The only creature he’ll likely miss will be Merle, the antisocial cat he shares his home with.Simon does, however, have a minor problem — he has no idea how They will orchestrate his extraction from our planet. With the threads of his earthly existence unravelling by the day, all he can do is wait patiently for a sign.Then, with time running out, he stumbles upon a significant clue to his departure. What Simon doesn’t know is that clue could uncover a truth more arcane than any alien world.

    His memory has been slipping, and he worries that soon he won’t remember her at all.When he finds a vintage cigar box hidden in June’s old dresser, he begins to obsess over the odd collection of knick-knacks contained inside it — but his journey to remember the past will take a horrifying turn for the worse.

     Fresh from Duck Soup (1933), Julius, Leonard, Arthur and Herbert Marx - or as the world knows them, Groucho, Chico, Harpo and Zeppo - are transported by a freak electrical storm to Nacogdoches, Texas in the year 1826. Landing in the midst of the Fredonian Rebellion (the first attempt by settlers in Texas to secede from Mexico) and into the company of the only other Jewish person in town, they are in deep dreck. Falling in with Stephen F. Austin and inadvertently filling his head with knowledge of what is to come, our heroes risk tampering with the future of Texas, and perhaps the entire U.S.A., in their quest to return to their own time. Will they find their way back? Or will they be doomed to live out their lives without indoor plumbing?

    When the system begins to misfire under the workload, the ill-equipped representatives of God and the Devil tasked with managing the process are given an ultimatum. Fix The Afternet or go back to your previous afterlives. They begin an odyssey through the hordes of souls awaiting judgement and the oblivious living in search of a solution. Rich in comic detail and populated with characters real and imagined from throughout time, their quest is never going to be straightforward…

    Keating the vampire used to love the stories that humans would write about his species. They had endlessly amused him.Madeline De Martine had changed all that though. From terrifying, bloodthirsty creatures of the night... to maudlin, effeminate idiots obsessed with adolescent American girls, De Martine's blockbuster romances had irrevocably ruined the image of the vampire as far as Keating was concerned.So tonight he's paying the multi-millionaire writer a visit to offer some constructive feedback, and show her the error of her ways... Dogs Of War Giving interactive gameplay a whole new meaning. Disaster... Epic. Huge. Unmitigated. Disaster. Zack Hampton's beloved Gamestation console has just committed electronic suicide - right in the middle of a hectic multiplayer Dogs Of War game.Where the hell is he supposed to find another one the week before Christmas? All the shops have sold out! Imagine Zack's delight when he stumbles on a quaint Christmas shop, run by the enigmatic Mister Fix... and discovers a unique 'special edition' Gamestation on sale for a bargain price. Following a very strange conversation with the old shopkeeper, Zack buys the console and rushes home to rejoin the online mayhem as quickly as possible. This Gamestation is very special though, and Zack is about to take part in a game of Dogs Of War he is never going to forget. I, Zombie A story of the thinking dead. 'My name is Jim Monroe and I am a zombie. My natural life on this planet has ceased and I've been re-animated to stalk the world as a pale, grotesque imitation of my former self. I'm different from my undead brethren though... I'm a zombie with a brain. This is the short, shocking story of how I came to be this way.'Spine Slaughter When hedgehogs attack! On a warm summer's day, the village of Wincing On Thames is attacked by the most unlikely of blood thirsty monsters.Hoards of deadly hedgehogs are on the loose, with a taste for human flesh. Can hockey stick wielding Jason, Scab the punk and their friends survive the onslaught? And what turned these normally placid little animals into creatures from the darkest of nightmares?

    Devin Lyle and Craig Rockwell are back, this time to a haunted castle in Ireland where a banshee may have gone wild—or maybe there's a much more rational explanation—one that involves a disgruntled heir, murder, and mayhem, all with that sexy light touch Heather Graham has turned into her trademark style.

    When Reid pushes Alex and their friends into invading a historically haunted Massachusetts house, Alex knows it’s a terrible idea, but indulges his friend. What could go wrong?Inside, a mysterious Shadow looms in the darkness. The door to the house vanishes, leaving them trapped. The group flees through the tiny, one-roomed house that defies logic, constantly shifting, presenting them with new doors, hallways, and rooms that seem to be plucked from their memories and fears. One by one, the Shadow hunts them, intent on burning them all from within.Is there any way to escape? Or will they be burned from the inside out?

    So you go on a road trip together, have a few drinks, a final fling before the long academic haul ahead. Young and bright, you feel the future surge beneath you like a sleek stallion, under your full control.But a series of small lapses ends in tragedy and now you're faced with a terrible decision: Do you take responsibility for what you've done and risk losing everything? Or flee into the night unseen, with only God and conscience as your jury?Sixteen years ago, Scott Bowman faced this decision...Now a successful psychiatrist with a loving family, Scott endures a judgement far more harrowing than any god or man could conceive. An ancient derelict appears in his practice, an apparently senile old man with a remarkable artistic talent. Otherwise disconnected from the world around him, this strange little man quickly demonstrates an ability to foretell events through his drawings.But before long Scott is left to wonder: is this eldritch prophet predicting events? Or shaping them?PRAISE FOR THE CARTOONIST"In THE CARTOONIST, Sean Costello creates a fast-moving read that mounts in tension while mixing horror with psychological anguish." —J. B. Macabre"Sean Costello's The Cartoonist is a wonderful blend of horror, psychology, and the power of suggestion that leaves you guessing right up to the very end!" —The New Jersey Grapevine

    Who are they? They are him and her. They are you and me. They are rowing to salvage what remains of themselves. They are rowing to remember the fun we’ve had."Michael Seidlinger is a homegrown Calvino, a humanist, and wise and darkly whimsical. His invisible cities are the spires of the sea where we all sail our coffins in search of our stories."--Steve Erickson, author of Zeroville“Melding the static, high-concept premise of two humans floating alone on a coffin in a sea devoid of all else with stark and meditative prose, The Fun We've Had evokes a highly unexpected experience, somewhere between Beckett's most hopeless solipsists and the mysterious energy of a child's Choose Your Own Adventure-era dream.”--Blake Butler, author of There Is No Year and Three Hundred Million“It is obvious that Michael J Seidlinger had a great deal of fun writing The Fun We've Had. What more could a reader ask for?”--Michael Kimball, author of Big Ray“The best poets are writing poetry no matter what they are writing, creating entirely new and weird spaces. There is no doubt Seidlinger has made one of the weirdest spaces we will ever inhabit. In The Fun We’ve Had, every visible thing is a love of disturbing tremors, keeping ahead of our ever-curious eyes, hoping to savor every line. What a magnificent book.”--CAConrad, author of The Book of Frank"Seidlinger’s imagination is a sea unto itself, the reader riding these rollicking waves. This book will have you clutching pages as though they’re life vests. Fans of Calvino and Shelley Jackson will dig the slow submerge into this crazy romp."--Joshua Mohr, author of Damascus"Michael J Seidlinger writes with the kind of weird, wonderful, joyful abandon that reminds the reader that world is still the great unknown. In The Fun We’ve Had, he examines the long blank space between life and death, fills it with love and loss and boats made of coffins, with people clinging to life and using the weight of the past as ballast. This is a fun read, true; but it's also a true read, and that's what makes it so beautifully sad."--Amber Sparks, author of The Desert Places and May We Shed These Human Bodies“Ready for an analogy? Here goes: When you need to give a dog a pill, you don’t just jam it down his throat, you wrap that pill in something yummy, like, say, ham. Michael J Seidlinger understands that this principle extends to people and books. So he’s got this pill he wants you to swallow, right? That pill is the truth about love and death and strife and, more generally, the messy mysterious business of being human, and also of being nothingness. Pretty heavy, right? Big old horse pill. But then Seidlinger, no fool, wraps it in the yummy slow-smoked maple goodness of his humor. He obviously had a fine time writing this book, which is precisely the reason you’ll have a fine time reading it.”–Ron Currie Jr., author of Flimsy Little Plastic Miracles

    Cotntains Blood Beast, Demon Apocalypse, Wolf Island, Death's Shadow, Dark Calling, Lord Loss, Demon Thief, Slawter, Bec

    Unfortunately, the way home isn't as clear-cut as he'd hoped and he's forced to turn to Aria, his GPS, for an alternate route. However, Aria has something far more sinister in mind...

    

    But are they? He is probably the only man who has ever requested the recipe for an airline’s lasagna or wanted to enjoy his flight with an inflatable rubber woman sat on his knee. Prepare to meet the man who must have his diet of stir-fried mulberry leaves accommodated and the man who left his false teeth on a flight and is sure he recognized them on a later flight—in a flight attendant's mouth. Ravenscroft's correspondence tackles travel annoyances like excess baggage charges alongside more surreal letters, such as the one starting out asking an Australian airline if they offer an authentic Australian experience (for instance, Australian cuisine or in-flight movies) which then moves on to the question of at what age a baby is safe from being swallowed by a dingo.

    What’s meant to be an uneventful trip turns into a coming-of-age journey that teaches Jem that adulthood is not as easy as he might have expected, and life usually has a plan of its own.

    She was really too young to understand what was happening - only that her mother was in disgrace and that they were leaving Aunt Mabe in America and returning home to England. The following May, Joanna - 'Jon' - was born. Rose and Jon were totally different. Jon was vivacious, fun, liked a good time, and always got what she wanted, even when what she wanted happened to belong to Rose. Rose was reserved, controlled, never wanted to leave her home or Gloucestershire, and was - well - an ordinary girl who grew into an ordinary woman. But as Jon raced from disaster to disaster, from one violent relationship to another, Rose, in her quiet way, salvaged the family, held them together, pasted over the cracks of tragedy and emotional upheavals whilst at the same time fighting her own personal crises. It was much later - when the children were growing up, when life at last seemed tranquil and settled - that Jon precipitated Rose across the Atlantic and into the most extraordinary event of her life. When Rose finally returned from America no-one could ever again think of her as an ordinary woman.