There was a terrible mistake-Wayside School was built with one classroom on top of another, thirty stories high! (The builder said he was sorry.) Maybe that's why all kinds of funny things happened at Wayside-especially on the thirteenth floor.

    Inside, you'll find hundreds of jokes that are guaranteed to stir up a room full of smiles, including knock-knocks, witty puns, and one-liners. Complete with hilarious quotes from celebrities like Jon Stewart, Lewis Black, and Jerry Seinfeld, everyone will revel in each gut-busting moment.So whether you're looking to add a few jokes to your repertoire, impress your buds, or improve your banter, this sidesplitting book arms you with the perfect joke for any occasion!

    Apparently it’s fine for Scrimshaw Travel to make last minute amendments to the holiday without incurring any penalties or reducing the price in any way. That’s what the indifferent courier tells him on day one of the tour as she arrives in a clapped-out, old coach being driven by a partially-sighted driver. With the spa hotel replaced by a rundown guest house staffed by a neurotic manager, decrepit waitress and under-sexed, Italian waiter there doesn’t appear to be much of the brochure-described holiday left. Thank goodness for Angela, the rather lovely woman Derek pals up with on the journey down. She might just make the trip bearable. If only the other members of the group would leave them alone long enough to get to know each other, but Derek has always had the ability to attract the eccentric characters to him and he can’t escape them. Still, perhaps they’ll surprise him as he learns about their lives and secrets as they move from one hilarious excursion to another. And maybe Angela will provide one or two surprises herself. Driven to Distraction is a fun romp through the English countryside with characters finding love and friendship while travelling at twenty miles an hour. (Well, it is a clapped-out, old coach).

    Our story begins with falling in love with France, specifically the enchanting Dordogne. We weren’t the first and we won’t be the last. The region was an inspiration to prehistoric man, as the earliest known works of art are to be found in the nearby caves of Lascaux. From the 1000 chateaux perched on towering cliffs overhanging the meandering Dordogne River to the countless plus beaux villages (most beautiful villages) dotting the region, it is truly a magical place.The first book is a roller-coaster ride of the ups and downs of making the dream a reality, beginning with, Oh my God, are we really doing this?! To looking for the home, getting a loan, wading through the red tape of actually moving, and studying French! Finally, the most important part of making “our” dream come true, adopting a baby girl to make the journey complete.

    He's kind to animals, loves children and helps old ladies across the street. But when he gets a pencil in his hands, he becomes a menace. No subject is too taboo. From dead kittens, to Helen Keller, to organized religion, there's no subject he won't twist. Politically correct? Dan Collins doesn't know the meaning.You've never seen cartoons like this before. This definitely isn't the Sunday funnies. Hilarious, demented and guaranteed to have you clutching your navel between gasps for air. Once you get hold of this book, you'll be convinced that this guy needs serious help before he's doomed to an eternity in hell.Check out this collection of insane cartoons and see if you're as demented as Dan Collins. If you find yourself laughing hysterically at some of the most marvelously bent cartoons ever created, plan on joining him on his decent into the inferno.From an early age Dan was heavily influenced by revolutionary comic artists such as Robert Crumb, B. Kliban, Gahan Wilson and Sam Gross. Coming from small town Ohio to Ohio State University in the early, turbulent 70's was a cultural and political awakening for him that would have a lasting impact. The Vietnam War and the counter culture revolution were the back drop from which this small town choirboy 'innocent' would pen his creations. What emerged were some of the most off the wall cartoons ever drawn.

    He just wanted to retire in peace. Change descended when he accidentally shot a Peeping Tom. Though he buried him on his remote Montana property, he couldn't bury the man's curse. Haunted by it, and about to be found out, he sent up a desperate prayer. That night he had a strange dream. Priscilla's interpretation of the dream was to stockpile enough food to look after seventy people for five years because perilous times were surely coming . . .

    Austin's 1903Three Men and a Maid 1922Uneasy Money 1917The White Feather 1907A Wodehouse Miscellany, Articles & Stories 1916

     They say everyone has a skeleton in their closet, but why are so many of them coming to life? Tempest and Amanda work at the only paranormal detective agency in the book and business is booming. This second box set gives you over 1000 pages of pulse-pounding hilarious paranormal mayhem as they get themselves into yet more hot water solving cases no one else would be dumb enough to take. Dead Pirates of Cawsand – A ghost ship has been spotted off the coast of a quiet Cornish village where gold coins were recently found. Now skeletal pirates are wandering the streets, hiding in the mist to strike fear into the local community because they want their gold back. But they didn’t count on England’s best paranormal P.I. turning up. His well-earned break soon goes sideways as murder, kidnap, and ghost hunters ruin his vacation and threaten more than just his life. In the Doodoo with Voodoo – A client cursed by a voodoo priest is the start of a case that will push Amanda to her very limits. With Tempest away in Cornwall, Amanda has no back up, but she wants to do this for herself even though the priest is a scary character. However, when BFF Patience goes missing, it’s a race against time to solve the case before someone dies and she is about to find out just how badly she underestimated her suspect. The Witches of East Malling – There’s a storm brewing. It’s late Autumn in England, but the wet weather is hiding a dark crime – witches using lighting to kill! Hired to investigate, Tempest soon becomes a target himself when he comes face to face with a witch and she knows who and what he is. Is he closing in on the coven, or are they closing in on him? The deadly conclusion with leave you breathless. Crop Circles, Cows, and Crazy Aliens – Aliens? Really? There are lights in the sky, crop circles in the fields and the cows are producing glowing milk. It’s Amanda’s case, and seems a simple one until the first body shows up. Suddenly she has a mystery person leaving her clues, an internet star trying to help her investigation and conspiracy nuts raining from the sky. Is this the first wave of an alien invasion, or something far worse? Whispers in the Rigging – His dad reported stories of a ghost in the old Royal Dockyard, but that’s not why Tempest is going undercover. He’s there because his dad was found unconscious in a dumpster when he tried to poke around. Now Tempest must find out what is going on, but all too soon he realises there’s something beneath the dockyard that is much worse than ghosts. The paranormal? It’s all nonsense, but proving might just get them killed.

    No complex terminology. ★FREE eBook Download inside★ Your dad taught you how to play Chess, but he didn’t teach you much. You already know how to checkmate and move the pieces, but let’s face it, your friends and family still beat you more than you’d like. You don't just want to play. You want to win and possibly CONQUER ALL YOUR FRIENDS! You sly dog! I know the feeling and I’m here to help. My name is Maxen R. Tarafa and I’m a Skill Artist. In a few short months, I went from a struggling post-beginner to an adept intermediate player and doubled my Chess ability by teaching myself. In this book, I show you how you can double, even triple, your Chess ability like I did, but faster. But I’m going to tell you right now. My method is rather controversial. You see, most chess “experts” bombard you with complex Chess notation (QxB6?) and expect you to read complex Chess terminology. I don’t do that. I’ll give you a cheat sheet of what you NEED to remember, and you’ll be off to the Chess boards and killing Queens like it’s nobody’s business. In this book, you learn: -How to play your first 10 moves so YOU control the game (Chess Openings) -How to use 3 techniques (or Chess tactics) like bringing light sabers to a knife fight -How to identify one weakness, if you simply recognize it, you can win in one move -How to cut your training time in ½. Know what to study and apply brainhacking techniques. -How to avoid common beginner mistakes with time-tested Chess strategy -Where to find FREE Chess websites, apps, videos, and technology to double your skills -How to use the one principle I taught to Eduardo that took him from losing miserably to unbeatable -How to “bend” the Chess rules with little-known special moves (it’s not cheating!) -And more I taught a 9-year-old these principles and a week later he was beating 17-year-olds. Anyone, even you, can learn how to double your Chess ability by learning a few easy principles. You’ll even learn how to speed your decision-making and play speed chess. If you’re looking for quick and easy Chess instruction to double your skills, but don’t want to learn complex terminology and notation, this book is for you! Don’t let your friend, brother, dad, or roommate beat you again! Join the Casual Chess revolution! Plain-English Chess Instruction for Casual Players, Post-Beginners, and People who Want to Learn Fast! ★Now Available in Paperback! To buy paperback, scroll up and click the Paperback link (by the cover image)★

    In another universe, humanity is overrun by monsters so evil that their very presence dims the light of the stars. In yet another universe, humanity is drawn into an endless battle for dominion over the galaxy. This is not one of those universes. In this universe, humanity is in charge of the Galactic Peace Committee. In theory, the Committee is an unmatched force for good, bringing peace and prosperity to countless worlds and ensuring that conflicts between different races are settled with words and not planet-cracking weaponry or super plagues designed to turn everyone into goo. In theory. Jake Smith is a diplomat. He works for the Committee. This is his story – and it goes about as well as you’d expect. In other words, it doesn’t go very well at all. Can Jake survive petty aliens? Sure. He’s a diplomat. It’s all part of the job. What about angry aliens? Probably. He does have a killer robot for a secretary, and he’s not bad with a shock staff. How about a fleet of aliens out for blood? That… that might be a little bit trickier. The Galactic Peace Committee… keeping peace (sort of) throughout the galaxy.

    In this book I have set out prove that statement is completely untrue and in fact with customers like these then maybe the opposite could be said. So sit back, grab your self a drink perhaps an alcoholic one if you feel that way inclined and enjoy some of the strangest, ridiculous and most outrageous complaints and statements from all walks of life. The second volume is out now and is much longer and in my opinion even better than the first, though i would say that.

    Having longed for children since before she can remember, she was suddenly faced with an array of unfamiliar, unexpected and sometimes downright embarrassing emotional and physical reactions. And when Poppy (and a year later Daisy) was born she had to learn a whole new set of skills.From trying to conceive and a first positive pregnancy test to Poppy's first birthday, Minus Nine To One takes you through the worries, surprises, excitement, miracles and sheer bloody hard work that Jools - and all new mums in their own different ways - have to cope with along the way. As Jools writes, 'This certainly isn't meant to be read as a guidebook, or a medical reference book - it is simply my story and I hope that you can relate to it in some way (and maybe even relax with it in the bath!).'Down to earth, personal and very, very funny, this is the book no aspiring mother will want to be without.

    However, this is not yet the case.Join Jade and her father as they visit Aunt Cora’s house, where Jade cracks one. See how Jade's father helps her understand, in a fun and creative way, what can be done inside the home and what can be done outside the home.Asaf Shani is the father of three girls. In the last 15 years, he has worked with thousands of people worldwide to help them improve their conflict management skills. Asaf's clients often tell him, "If only I would have known these life skills 30 years ago …" and "Why wasn't I taught this stuff when I was a kid?" These remarks, usually accompanied with a sigh, were the motivation for Asaf to write “Jade’s Life Skills Series”—a series of books intended to facilitate a discussion between parents and their children about all those latent and vitally important life skills. Learning Manners is the first book in “Jade's Life Skills Series.” In this book, through the international subject of … farting, the importance of context is brought to light.

    Here in New Mouse City, the capital of Mouse Island, my books are all bestsellers! My stories are funny, fa-mouse-ly funny. They are whisker-licking-good tales, and that’s a promise!Red Pizzas for A Blue CountMy troublemaker cousin was trapped in Transratania! And before I could even squeak, my sister, Thea, dragged me along on her rescue mission. Little did we know that Transratania is the land of vampire bats! Holey cheese, bats give me goose bumps!Attack of the Bandit CatsCaptured by cats! It’s every rodent’s worst nightmare. It al started when my cousin Trap convinced me to join him on a quest for a legendary island covered in silver. But before you could say “hot cheese on toast,” we were attacked by a ship of pirate cats!A Fabumouse Vacation for Geronimo Sometimes a busy businessmouse like me needs a nice, relaxing vacation. But everytime I tried to get away, disaster struck! By the time I finally tore myself away from The Rodent’s Gazette, all the good trips were booked up. I found myself stuck in a flea-ridden old hotel, sharing a room with a bunch of Gerbil Scouts!

    -- The book that was confiscated by the Secret Service because they thought it contained hacking secrets (It doesn't)-- Nominated for the Origins Award for Best Roleplaying Supplement.