because he wants to watch Caillou, he’s an a-hole. When your daughter outlines every corner of your living room with a purple crayon, she’s an a-hole. When your rug rats purposely decorate the kitchen ceiling with their smoothies, they’re a-holes. So it’s only natural to want to kill them sometimes. Of course you can’t because you’d go to prison, and then you’d really never get to poop alone again. Plus, there’s that whole loving them more than anything in the whole world thing. Karen Alpert is the writer of the popular blog Baby Sideburns. You may have seen some of her more viral posts like “Ten Things I Really F’ing Want for Mother’s Day,” “Daddy Sticker Chart” and “What NOT to F’ing Buy My Kids this Holiday.” Or you may know her from her Facebook page that has over 130,000 followers. I Heart My Little A-Holes is full of hilarious stories, lists, thoughts and pictures that will make you laugh so hard you’ll wish you were wearing a diaper.

    The cruel bon mot which has its sting drawn from the laughter that ensues. It was Oscar Wilde who pointed out that no comment was in bad taste if it was amusing - and if for that reason alone it is worth while preserving these delightful examples of verbal dexterity.

    Divorce taught Grizzard that Sunday nights are endless and that strange things grow on food left uncovered in the refrigerator. If Love Were Oil, I'd be About a Quart Low is the bittersweet account of Grizzard's three marriages and three subsequent divorces. Based on his bestselling book of the same name, this program features the inimitable talent of Lewis Grizzard and his very personal, often humorous views on women.The Lewis Grizzard column is syndicated nationally in more than 250 newspapers. He has written eight bestselling books, and is in great demand as an after dinner speaker. He and his dog, Catfish, live in Atlanta, Georgia.Other titles by Lewis Grizzard available through Sound Editions from Random House: My Daddy was a Pistol and I'm a Son of a Gun and Elvis is Dead and I Don't Feel so Good Myself.

    Never fear, there are hundreds of ways to revolt against the tedium of everyday life. Whether it’s making rude gestures to a hotel clerk under the desk or making your own "Do Not Disturb" sign that says "Come In If You Like Swordplay," Rich Fulcher's inventive collection will allow readers to unleash their rebellious sides—without getting arrested. Other tiny acts include unbuckling your seat belt before the plane has fully stopped, squeezing a zit into the ATM camera, driving through a lonely red light in the dead of night, wearing a French Renaissance outfit on casual Fridays, and greeting a stranger with a limp, well-lotioned hand. Featuring original illustrations by Mr. Bingo, the illustrator of The Book of General Ignorance whose clients have included Absolut, New York Times, Nike, and Suicide Girls; and designed by Dave Brown, also known as Bollo the gorilla in The Mighty Boosh and designer of The Mighty Book of Boosh.

    In her memoir, she vividly recounts falling in love, finding a job, getting drunk, getting dumped, realizing that Ivan from the corner shop might just be the only reliable man in her life, and that absolutely no one can ever compare to her best girlfriends. Everything I Know About Love is about bad dates, good friends and—above all else— realizing that you are enough.Glittering with wit and insight, heart and humor, Dolly Alderton’s unforgettable debut weaves together personal stories, satirical observations, a series of lists, recipes, and other vignettes that will strike a chord of recognition with women of every age—making you want to pick up the phone and tell your best friends all about it. Like Bridget Jones’ Diary but all true, Everything I Know About Love is about the struggles of early adulthood in all its terrifying and hopeful uncertainty.

    Helping to bring these forgotten figures into the light, Andrew Gimson's illuminating accounts are accompanied by sketches from Guardian sartirical cartoonist, Martin Rowson, making this the perfect gift for all lovers of history and politics.

     A relatable must-read for anyone who has lost a loved one, this memoir lights the way to afterlife and afterdeath where forgiveness supersedes pain, blame, remorse and regret. In her effort to understand the generational effects of alcoholism and subsequent dysfunctional adult relationships, Marlayna takes her youngest son and her father's ashes on a personal journey, embarking on an emotional voyage to both physical and mental states of being. She confronts her own existence as a mother and a daughter, seeking and ultimately finding peace with her disappointment, anger, failed marriage, and complex relationships with her own four children.

    This one-of-a-kind anthology captures the spine tingling adventures of daring men and women who venture into Alaska's vast wilderness and look death in the eye. Danger Stalks the Land relates gripping episodes of animal attacks, avalanches, aircraft disasters, fishing, hunting, and skiing accidents, and chronicles risky climbs and reckless mountaineering amid Alaska's fantastic peaks. Through exhaustive research and interviews, author Larry Kaniut has captured in one volume, the terror and beauty of man's attempt to explore a vast and unforgiving land.

    Taken, along with her mother and father, from the Terezín ghetto in Prague, Dita is adjusting to the constant terror that is life in the camp. When Jewish leader Freddy Hirsch asks Dita to take charge of the eight precious volumes the prisoners have managed to sneak past the guards, she agrees. And so Dita becomes the librarian of Auschwitz. Out of one of the darkest chapters of human history comes this extraordinary story of courage and hope.

    Maybe I'm wearing everything out, but I believe the body is a fantastic thing and it will repair itself and I'll go again. If it's running too rich, I don't stop what I'm doing, just weaken the mixture and carry on.'Since we last heard from him, Guy Martin has restored a 1983 Williams F1 car then raced Jenson Button in it; helped to build a WWI tank; ridden with Putin's favourite biker gang the Night Wolves; competed on the classic endurance circuit; stood on top of one of Chernobyl's nuclear reactors and taken part in his last ever Isle of Man TT.Then there's the stuff he really can't wait to get out of bed for: 12-hour shifts for a local haulage firm and taytie farming in his new John Deere tractor.Besides all this, he's saved his local pub from closure and become a dad.But let him tell you his own stories, in his own words:'You're getting it from the horse's mouth. No filter. I hope you enjoy it.'

    Paul Kalanithi. As he nears the end of his 7-year residency he gets the report no one wants, cancer. Now his forty-year plan is scrapped. The hopes and dreams he and Lucy, his wife, have held to are dramatically altered. In this book you will find the story of a man that seeks out truth and meaning in a very detailed way. From his undergraduate literary pursuits to his combined goal of neuroscience and surgery Dr. Kalanithi desires to connect meaning to every aspect of human life. As cancer becomes his story the reader will see the emotional decisions made about starting a family and continuing his beloved career. Dr. Kalanithi begins to see how his care for his patients would be altered as he experiences the treatments himself. Through every emotion Paul and Lucy share the love for each other and life. Inside this SUMMARY READS Summary & Highlights of When Breath Becomes Air: Summary of Each Chapter Highlights (Best Quotes) BONUS: Critics Corner BONUS: Free Report about The Tidiest and Messiest Places on Earth - http: //sixfigureteen.com/messy.

    For Cazzie David, the world is one big trap door leading to death and despair and social phobia. From shame spirals caused by hookups to panic attacks about being alive and everyone else having to be alive too, David chronicles her life’s most chaotic moments with wit, bleak humor, and a mega-dose of self-awareness. In No One Asked for This, David provides readers with a singular but ultimately relatable tour through her mind, as she explores existential anxiety, family dynamics, and the utterly modern dilemma of having your breakup displayed on the Internet. With pitch-black humor resonant of her father, comedy legend Larry David, and topics that speak uniquely to generational malaise, No One Asked for This is the perfect companion for when you don’t really want a companion.Mean sister --Do not disturb --Ex dysmorphia --Almost pretty --Is everything gonna be fine? --Tweets I would tweet if I weren't morally opposed to Twitter: I --Why God is definitely real --Too full to fuck --So embarrassing --Love you to death --Insecurity when you're the new girlfriend --Environ-mental mom --Tweets I would tweet if I weren't morally opposed to Twitter: II --Shit-talking etiquette --My parasite --Privileged assistant --I got a cat for my anxiety --This essay doesn't pass the Bechdel test --Tweets I would tweet if I weren't morally opposed to Twitter: III --Moving out --Erase me --Thanksgiving

    (I understand that it’s likely the former, which is a fancy “book” way of saying “the first one.”) I talk about my grandparents, doing stand-up comedy as a teenager, bar mitzvahs, and Jewish summer camp, and tell way more stories about doing drugs than my mother would like. I also talk about some of my adventures in Los Angeles, and surely say things about other famous people that will create a wildly awkward conversation for me at a party one day. I hope you enjoy the book should you buy it, and if you don’t enjoy it, I’m sorry. If you ever see me on the street and explain the situation, I’ll do my best to make it up to you.

    The airlines were international superstars; even among those long-gone carriers, their still-remembered names can conjure deep feelings of nostalgia, romance, and adventure: Braniff, Continental, BOAC, Swissair, TWA, Pan Am.This was the fifties and sixties. The world was on the move, and it was the new jet planes that were getting people there. But competition for the travel dollar was fierce, and Madison Avenue decided the face (and heart) of every airline would be the flight attendant, the stewardess. So it was that the “stew” became synonymous with the airline’s brand. She—and at that time they were exclusively female—was the airline.The stewardess became the fantasy every woman: glamorous professional, high-end server, customer service expert, nurse, therapist, and in no small measure: sex symbol.And to that end, these women were carefully selected for their looks and brains, then rigorously trained for weeks, and finally dressed as high-flying, high-heeled models in uniforms often created by top fashion designers. Heddy Frosell da Ponte was one of those chosen women. She was the ideal candidate to be employed by Pan Am in the 1960s: a pretty female with a terrific figure, under thirty-two years old, unmarried, and a speaker of multiple languages.The Glamour Years of Flying as a Stewardess is Heddy’s fascinating, often times hilarious collection of exploits as she traveled the world as a stewardess during the golden age of international air travel.This remarkable book is also a rare look back at the people, places, cultures, and lifestyles gone forever, but now brought back to vivid life by a stewardess-turned-author who knows how to tell a fast-moving tale. So buckle up; this will be one flight you’ll never forget. About the Author Heddy Frosell da Ponte was a flight attendant for forty five years. Now retired, she lives in Georgia. She is the author of The Glamour Years of Flying as a Stewardess.

    The search for little Pearl consumed the next several weeks, and the story became front page news all over the United States. Hundreds of residents from the nearby towns of Waldron and Booneville Arkansas helped in the search, and a mysterious mountain hermit seemed to hold the secret to Pearl's disappearance. The incredible events that followed contributed to a mountain legend that still exists today.