What she does like are clean houses, and dirty martinis. She recently traded in her housecleaning business for a P.I. license. Her timing seems perfect, when she cleans a former client's freezer and finds a severed hand inside, wearing an expensive ring. The client, Benny Needles, is a Dean Martin fanatic who swears he's innocent. But where there's a hand, there's a body, waiting to be found.It's a brand new world for Peri, and she has a lot to learn. Her boyfriend, Skip, a detective in the Placentia Police Department warns Peri that this case could be dangerous, but she can't stop sticking her nose into the middle of things. Her first lesson is that investigating murder can have bad consequences. In the middle of trying to solve the case, Peri takes on a surveillance job. The philandering husband is unhappy with her, and she discovers that even surveillance isn't always low risk. As the two cases collide, will Peri learn the truth behind both of them? And more important, will she ever get that dirty martini?

    Flip-flops are optional. All of your favorite hilarious Fun Stories gathered together in one place! Plus, extended versions of many of your laugh out loud favorites. PRAISE FOR FUN STORIES: “The offbeat & heartwarming humor kept me turning pages due to its rollicking adventures in every chapter. Your friends, loved ones, and co-workers will enjoy it too." "It's very funny and on point observational humor” “Has me laughing from beginning to end” "Similar to Dave Barry, Eric Idle, and Stephen Colbert's humor" “This guy's funny and charmingly off the wall” "Always thought coffee could get me through the midweek blues, but this blows it out of the water" "I love Fun Stories. Fantastic!" "Awesome stuff, really enjoyed the horse names. Great read." "Excellent and hilarious material here" INCLUDES ALL OF THESE AND MANY MORE: "Chick-fil-A Makes Me Feel Like Leonardo DiCaprio" "The Least Amount of Fame Possible (Old MacDonald)" "Cub Scout Dropout" "Not the Next Carrie Underwood" "Bigfoot Popcorn" "Gatorade For Your Soul" "Shamelessly Suggestive City Names" "I'm the Freakin' Michael Phelps of Googling" "Alright, Alright, Alright!" "Mind Game of Thrones" "Happy Friday (Mr. Pee Man)" "Clown Commuter Award" "How NASA Thins The Herd" "Crunchy Roads, Take Me Home" "Good Folks, Bad Coaching" "Ultimate Waitress Revenge" "Battle of the Bands" You'll be smiling for hours as the pages turn themselves. Three Fun Stories books have hit #1 on Amazon Humor. Five audio tracks from this book have hit the top 10 on the iTunes comedy chart. Click to download the book and start the fun! Need more info? If you enjoy the humor of these folks, you'll love reading Fun Stories Greatest Hits: Dave Barry, Dilbert, David Sedaris, Stephen Colbert, Carl Hiaasen, Christopher Moore, Jim Gaffigan, Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Jerry Seinfeld, Eric Idle, Erma Bombeck, Sebastian Maniscalco, Mindy Kaling, Jen Lancaster, Amy Lyle, The Far Side, Kevin Allison, Rainn Wilson, B.J. Novak, Sloane Crosley, Jimmy Fallon, Steve Martin, Judd Apatow, Adam Mansbach, Justin Halpern, Reader’s Digest, Dad Jokes, Garfield, Saturday Night Live, Friends, and The Office. Download Fun Stories Greatest Hits to start your next comedy adventure! Enjoy Fun Stories video posts at www.facebook.com/FunStoriesSeries. Get a free Fun Pack at www.mentalkickball.com. HUMOR, HUMOR & ENTERTAINMENT, PARENTING & FAMILIES, PARODIES, SATIRE, ESSAYS, SHORT STORIES, CELEBRITY & POPULAR CULTURE, COMEDY, CULTURAL, ETHNIC & REGIONAL, CARTOONS, JOKES & RIDDLES, MEN, WOMEN & RELATIONSHIPS, TRAVEL, POP CULTURE, RADIO, TELEVISION, PERFORMING ARTS, FUNNY BOOKS, HUMOR ESSAYS, FUNNY SHORT STORIES, FUNNY MEMOIR, HUMOR MEMOIR, FUNNY BOOK CLUB BOOKS, FUNNY ESSAYS, HUMOR BOOKS, HUMOROUS BOOKS, GIFTS FOR DAD, FUNNY GIFTS, LAUGH, LAUGH OUT LOUD, FUN, FUN, FUN, MORE COWBELL COWBELL

    A talking pink iguana. A town trying to solve a lawman’s murder. Hi, I’m Glinda Goodall — the Good Witch of the South — and I want to welcome you to Witch’s Cove, Florida, a delightful beach town where witches and humans reside in peace and harmony. Sounds perfect, right? Yeah, that’s what it says on the billboard, but here’s the real scoop. My aunt, who runs the Tiki Hut Grill where I work, sees ghosts — or rather sees one of them — namely her dead husband. My mom, a funeral director, is addicted to all things that have to do with The Wizard of Oz. She even has a terrier named Toto. And then there’s my familiar, Iggy, who is a very disgruntled pink iguana who fancies himself a detective. As for me, I’m a problem solver. My flaws are that I’m way too nosy for my own good, and I rarely say the right thing at the right time. This week’s exciting news? Our not-so-beloved law enforcement officer was murdered, and my best friend’s brother was accused of the crime. I have to help find the real killer, right? How could I not? Stop in to Witch’s Cove and grab a meal at the Tiki Hut Grill. You just might see me and my familiar in action.

    Divorced, low on funds, and unhappy with where she's at in life, she decides to buy a lodge in the mountains and start over. When she arrives at her new home, she finds the grand lodge is a run-down mess. To make matters worse, she finds the one person she's connected with standing over a dead body on her first full day in town. Now, Toni needs to find a way to clear her new friend of murder while searching for a job and figuring out what to do with the lodge she'd pinned her dreams on. Throw in a goofy dog who needs a home, a ghost reluctant to share his space, and a handsome neighbor eager to help her rebuild, and she's got her hands full. Determined to make her fresh start a success, she rolls up her sleeves and gets to work, but will it be enough? This is the first book in the Haunted Lodge Cozy Mystery series.

    You can’t fathom the weirdness– unless you’re one of the ER aliens. If you are, buy a dozen copies to give away: to your family, your neighbors, and the PTA. They’ll learn things you never had the heart to tell them, but they should know, like how it's like to work in the ER, the deviousness of shampoo bottles and the dangers of frying bacon naked.

    But when a body falls from a laundry chute and lands at Laura’s feet, replacing flowered wallpaper becomes the least of her duties. To clear her young assistant of the murder and save her fledgling business, Laura’s determined to find the killer. Turns out it’s not as easy as renovating a manor home, especially with two handsome men complicating her mission: the police detective assigned to the case and the real estate agent trying to save the manse from foreclosure. Worse still, the meddling of a horoscope-guided friend, a determined grandmother, and the local funeral director could get them all killed before Laura props the first pillow. - - - - - - - - - - - - - STAGING IS MURDER by Grace Topping | A Henery Press Mystery. If you like one, you’ll probably like them all.

    Get paid to travel and write about it.Only no one told Jules that it would mean eating oily seabirds, repeatedly falling off a husky sled, getting stranded on a Mediterranean island, and crash-landing in Iran.The exotic destinations come thick and fast – Hong Kong, Hawaii, Huddersfield – as Jules navigates what it means to be a travel writer in a world with endless surprises up its sleeve.Add in a cast of larger-than-life characters – Elvis, Captain Cook, his own travel-mad Dad – and an eye for the ridiculous, and this journey with Jules is one you won’t want to miss.

    Meet Dora and Evie, two best friends who are suddenly thrown into the world of life undercover as they fight to prove Dora’s innocence in the death of her money-laundering boss.

    Moving a thousand miles after inheriting an apartment in her Mom’s hometown was one thing. Finding out that she comes from a family of witches was another. Surprise? Still reeling from the new information, Lou finds herself at odds with the owner of the local coffee shop. No big deal, right? Until the owner shows up dead, right outside Lou’s front door. Now the prime suspect, Lou’s got to hurry and solve the murder before she’s tried in the court of public opinion. When the victim turns out to have ties to a drug ring, the whole case gets more complicated. Especially when the same drugs are found in Lou’s new apartment. Between the talking dog, her new magic lessons, gaining a family, and the ridiculously handsome, single-father ex-cop who seems to pop up wherever she goes, Lou’s got more than enough to keep her busy. When the police chief decides she’s guilty and will go to any lengths to prove it, Lou has to hurry and figure out who actually ‘dunit’ before she’s locked up for good.

    Millicent Le Sueur is an eccentric, obsessive-compulsive bag lady in a rural Southern town who witnesses the killing of a teenage girl. Or so she claims. Some townsfolk believe she killed the girl and made up the story to cover her crime. Counting, checking, deducing and tracking, she looks for a killer she hopes won’t count her as the next victim.

    To find closure and the truth about superstitions, Rory takes her dog Pluckie to a town called Destiny, where superstitious beliefs are a way of life.Rory's visit to Destiny takes an unexpected turn when Pluckie saves Martha, the owner of the Lucky Dog Boutique. While Martha recovers, Rory reluctantly agrees to manage the pet shop for her. But when Martha becomes the prime suspect in the local bookshop owner's murder, Rory can't believe that the sweet old woman would do it. Convinced the real killer is still roaming Destiny's streets, Rory resolves to crack the case before Martha's luck runs out.Praise:"Doggone cute."-LIBRARY JOURNAL"

    Drunk, Jr. if you really wanna know. And I'm on a plane headed to Paradise Isle on the trip of a lifetime. The occasion? My honeymoon. Except, there's only one problem.I'm riding solo.It's a really long story, and if you don't mind, I'd prefer to leave it at that.Really? You must know? Fine, I get it. You're the nosey type. Here's the abbreviated version. I came within an inch of marrying a cheating slut. There. Get the picture? Good.But that's not what this story is about. This story is about what happened after I got to Paradise and a dead body showed up in my motel room.And, of course, the cops tried to blame it on me.And then the actual murderer decided they wanted me dead too.Fuck.The hits just kept on coming.And to top it all off. This woman started following me around the island, and she couldn't seem to keep her hands off me. But not in a good way.So if you're interested in a bit of Caribbean flavored action and adventure, with a hint of sexual tension, a dash of unapologetic profanity, and a kick-ass ending, then this is your book.If you're looking for the next best piece of literature since - oh, hell, who am I kidding? I don't know shit about good literature. But if that's what you're looking for, then keep moving, cause this ain't that.If, however, you're like me and just looking for a good time, then I'm your fella. I promise you, you won't be disappointed.Rated R for language, crude humor, and sexual innuendos. Rated A+ for entertainment value.

    Convicted dealer Christopher Morgan swears off black market genetics for good. Before he's even released from prison, he finds himself on a hit list. Someone wants Chris dead and he has no idea why. Once released, Chris takes the first job he's offered. But, soon after, the new boss at his lab is murdered. Chris fears it has something to do with his past—and so do the police. He enlists the help of a close colleague, Tracy Harrow, to clear his name and search for answers. They discover a shocking connection between Chris and the other names on the hit list. In a perilous race against time, Chris and Tracy realize that far more is at stake than just Chris's life. Together, they uncover a dark conspiracy that goes deeper into the world of bioengineering and genetic enhancements than they could have imagined. Enhancement is a fast-paced, near-future thriller about genetic engineering, organized crime, and the abuse of advanced technology.

    And the Cauldron Festival celebration has ignited her mother's passion once again for matchmaking. And when the warlock she's supposed to hook up with brings an entourage of Shifters as security with him, Brita is certain she wants nothing to do with the self-important jerk.However, she can't seem to get one of the Shifters off her mind.Cas, a werewolf on an assignment from the Council, can't let something like lust, love, and the mating scent get in the way of his job, but Brita makes it hard for him to do the task he was hired for—very, very hard—by her mere presence. Besides, she's bossy, sometimes she's a little mean, and her magic has attracted the attention of some very dangerous people. Still, protecting Brita is turning out the be the only job he really wants.

    investigator Morris Brick, a former homicide cop on the trail of a murderous psychopath who gives a terrifying new meaning to the word DERANGED . . . They call him the Skull Cracker Killer. He drugs his victims. Breaks open their skulls with a hammer and chisel. The rest is inhuman. Five years ago he terrorized New York City, claiming twelve victims before the killing stopped. Now he’s racking up victims on a fresh hunting ground. Where former LAPD homicide detective Morris Brick is working as a consultant on a serial-killer film. Where a desperate mayor pleads with Brick to take on the case. And where the only way he can stop the next wave of murders is by outsmarting a madman—before he strikes again, this time much too close to home . . .