“You’re about as useful as a windshield wiper on a goat’s butt.” Keep this book handy, someday you’ll be glad you have it. “Let's play horse. I'll be the front end and you just be yourself.” Pick any of the many jaw-dropping insults then laugh at the look on your adversary’s face when you whip one out and use it on them. You’ll leave no doubt in their mind that you are a master of sarcastic insults! ADDED BONUS: In addition to the fresh and hilarious insults in this book, you’ll also find great sarcastic observations about life hidden inside this book’s pages, like… “I think the reason so many people have smart phones is because opposites attract!” You’re no idiot, so you need this book to start your new life as the master of sarcastic insults and put-downs! “Hey! Who left the Idiot Box open? Now they're everywhere!”

    

    James Bond isn't a secret agent. The funny bone isn't a bone. E-readers like the Kindle were invented in 1949. Slavery has never been more common as it is today. Neanderthals were extremely smart and were able to speak. Vikings invented rap battles. Natural oranges aren't orange. Rats didn't cause the Black Death. Halitosis doesn't exist. Buddhists don't worship Buddha. Everyone mispronounces "Nutella." St. Patrick wasn't Irish. There has never been 50 states in the United States. Selfies aren't a recent fad. They have existed since 1839. Guardian angels aren't mentioned in the Bible. A comatose person can speak and walk around. Nicotine doesn't cause cancer.

    Maybe your teacher took the controversial stand that the Civil War was all about states’ rights… or maybe you learned all about the horrors slavery, but never quite figured out why things didn’t get better after the war ended. If you didn’t go to school in the United States, things are even more confusing. When the media is full of references to the Confederate flag, the legacy of slavery, and poverty in the American South, you might have a vague sense that things are bad because of the Civil War… but why? Why does a war that happened over a hundred and fifty years ago still cast a shadow over the United States? This book will tell you why. It will lead you, step-by-step, through the causes of the Civil War, and the effects. But unlike your high school history teacher, it won’t put you to sleep with long-winded biographies and lists of dates. The names you’ll learn are the big players, the ones with big personalities, who made big differences. In just a few minutes a day, you can read bite-sized stories from the Civil War – quick, easy explanations to guide you through the main points, with just enough scary, surprising, or just plain strange facts to keep you coming back for more. Each chapter ends with a bonus helping of trivia and some quick questions to test your knowledge. By the time you’re finished, you’ll know all the facts your history teacher never taught you – from who said slavery was a “positive good” (and why they thought that), to who dressed up in women’s clothing to escape from Union soldiers.

    Norman Baker said that about his autobiography. Why? He was a jackass. In the pages of this book meet 20 losers, killers, confidence tricksters, and incompetents - the Jackasses of History. For adult readers.

    Covering Sid's early years in South Africa and life as a ladies' hairdresser, his obsession with gambling and women, his questioning by Scotland Yard in a murder case, Hancock's Half Hour and the Carry On films, and Sid's death on stage at the age of 63, Cliff Goodwin reveals the amazing truth behing the legend.

    

    I just want to be known as a clown because to me that's the height of my profession. It means you can do everything-sing, dance, and above all, make people laugh.” – Red Skelton “All I want to do is to make people laugh, to take the word ‘heartache’ out of their vocabulary” – Red Skelton A lot of ink has been spilled covering the lives of history’s most influential figures, but how much of the forest is lost for the trees? In Charles River Editors’ American Legends series, readers can get caught up to speed on the lives of America’s most important men and women in the time it takes to finish a commute, while learning interesting facts long forgotten or never known. Among radio personalities and television entertainers, almost nobody had a career as long or storied as Red Skelton, one of America’s foremost comedians during the 20th century. Over the course of 70 years, Skelton made crowds laugh from vaudeville to performing as a clown, and while he is best known for The Red Skelton Show and his other variety shows, he also managed a 45 year stage career, as a pantomime or one of the other characters he created over the years. Although Skelton was extremely popular in America at the peak of his career, his entertainment was also a throwback to the early 20th century, which compelled television studios to balk at the notion of continuing to air his shows by 1970, even though his shows had spent almost two straight decades with Top 10 ratings on the air. Understandably bitter, Skelton refused to have his shows in syndication until the 1980s, and by then, the same concerns about his appeal to younger crowds had only gotten worse as he and his show had aged. Skelton is still best remembered for his performances and his television career, but he was also a noted artist who fittingly excelled at depicting clowns on canvas. Despite the seemingly silly content of his work, Skelton’s skills as an artist were so impressive that he made millions of dollars a year selling his art and having it displayed. By the time he died in 1997, it’s estimated that he may have made more money through art than through performing. American Legends: The Life of Red Skelton chronicles the life and career of one of America’s most beloved comedians. Along with pictures of important people, places, and events, you will learn about Red Skelton like never before, in no time at all.

    

    

    Jokes, humor, and comedy come in many forms. Whether it is a few funny jokes, a silly joke book, or a funny movie, we can all benefit from the positive effects of comedy and humor! You'll love this hilarious joke book. Share a funny joke with a friend today! Kindle Unlimited and Amazon Prime Members can borrow this book for FREE! 100+ funny insults and jokes Hilarious insults, comedy, and humor Hours of funny jokes and entertainment With this MASSIVE collection of funny insult jokes you can make everyone laugh! This ebook full of funny insults is perfect for any occasion. You and your friends will laugh for hours at this funny joke book. Uses for funny jokes... Can aid in story-telling Great for conversation starters Improves conversation and social skills Can make others laugh, smile, and be more playful Can lighten tense moods and create rapport with others Are you looking for funny and hilarious insult jokes? You’re so dumb… you thought the Harlem Shake was a drink! LOL You’re so fat… you fell out of both sides of the bed! HAHA You’re so poor… you wash your paper plates! LOL Your feet are so big your shoes need license plates! This Hilarious Joke Book has 100+ Funny Insults About... You’re so dumb insults You’re so ugly insults You’re so fat insults You’re so skinny insults You’re so poor insults Other insults… LOL Funny Jokes Club The LOL Funny Jokes Club is dedicated to comedy. We'll tickle your funny bone with our side-splitting jokes and humor. Whether it's funny and hilarious one-liners, dirty adult jokes, or laugh-out-loud rib tickling knee slappers, the LOL Funny Jokes Club does it all! Scroll up and click "buy" to start laughing now! If for any reason you are unsatisfied, there is a 100% money back guarantee!Tags: insults, jokes, insult joke book, insult, joke books, funny insult jokes, fat jokes, skinny jokes, dumb jokes, stupid jokes, yo momma jokes ebook, ebooks, jokes, funny, kindle joke books, funny jokes, book, comedy, lol, jokes, funny, insults, jokes, haha, joke, laugh, laughing, giggle, humor, comedy, funny, humor, kindle ebooks, joke club, dirty jokes, adult jokes, funny jokes books, hilarious jokes, funny books, funny jokes, laugh, laughter, laughing, funny books, comedy, humor, laughter, e books, ebook download, jokes, joke book, funny jokes, funny joke books

    Whereas Caesar Triumphant covers Caesar's invasion of the Isle of Wa, now known as Japan, Caesar Ascending is set in 44 BC and tells the story of his planned invasion of Parthia, and includes the characters of the internationally bestselling Marching With Caesar series, featuring Titus Pullus. Determined not to repeat the mistakes made by Caesar's friend and fellow Triumvir Marcus Licinius Crassus, the Dictator has trained his Legions in tactics specifically designed to thwart the famed Parthian cataphracts and horse archers, but as Caesar and his army learns, the Parthians have been working on their own surprises, all in an attempt to destroy another Roman army and send a message to Rome that they are not the only world power.

    Learn the Alphabet and pronunciation as well as useful phrases in 8 categories, such as greetings, travel and directions, making friends to business and emergencies. Download, read and enjoy your vacation like never before.

    You’ll also discover what Area 51 is — and why “ufologists” are so fascinated with this secretive facility. You’ll also learn about the portrayal of aliens in pop culture, the ancient spiritual connections between religion and aliens, and unanswered questions about alien hieroglyphics on Mars! With It’s Special “Textbook” Formatting and Exercises, This Book Ensures You Understand All of This Essential Knowledge! In UFOs and Aliens, you’ll find out about alien encounters, abductions, and UFO Sightings. This book also describes crop circles and other unexplained phenomena that may be evidence of visitors from other worlds! You’ll discover what the New World Order is, whether alien civilizations are good or bad, and whether an alien invasion is imminent! You’ll even learn how “ancient aliens” may have facilitated or accelerated human development! Hurry! Download this Expanded Second Edition of UFOs and Aliens: UFO Secrets (& Conspiracies) – Area 51, Alien & UFO Encounters, Alien Civilizations & the New World Order (Conspiracy) right away! Just scroll to the top of the page and select the Buy Button. Download Your Copy TODAY!

     This book is perfect for history lovers. Author James Weber did the research and compiled this huge list of events and battles that changed the course of history forever. Some of them include: - The Japanese Invasion of Manchuria (September 18, 1931) - The Signing of the Non-Aggression Pact between Germany and the Soviet Union (August 23, 1939) - The Battle of Britain (Summer 1940) - Pearl Harbor (December 7, 1941) - The Destruction of Cologne during the Thousand Bomber Raid (May 30, 1942) - The Battles of Midway (June 1942) - The German Surrender at Stalingrad (February 2, 1943) - Drop of the Atomic Bomb on Hiroshima (August 6, 1945) and many many more The book takes you through the most important events of WWII from before the beginning of the war in 1939 until its end in 1945. It contains all the major battles and fights. You will find pictures and explanations to every event, making this the perfect resource for students and anyone wanting to broaden their knowledge in history. Download your copy now! Tags: world war ii books, world war 2 historical fiction, history, world history, history books, history of war, war tactics, military, history books best sellers, world war 2 books for kindle, world war 2 books for teens, world war 2 books young adult, history books for kids, military tactics, world war 2 memorabilia, world war ii in colour, world war 2 movies, world war 2 posters, world war 2 books for kids, world war 2 books for adults, history channel, nazi germany, axis, allies, d-day, history for dummies, iwo jima, pearl harbor, adolf hitler, world war z, world war, third reich, erwin rommel, heinrich himmler,