Book picks similar to
Parental Advisory by George Carlin


humor
audiobooks
nonfiction
philosophy-and-ideas

Broken Bananah: Life, Love, and Sex... Without a Penis


Ross Asdourian - 2018
    Broken Bananah is my completely true and overly honest journey through severe genital trauma. What happens when you lose something you love? And... can you really break a penis? Absolutely, and mine was one of the worst on file. Tethered to a catheter and surrounded by that’s-what-she-said jokes, I learned one of life’s greatest lessons: it can always be worse. Experience life and love without a penis in a recovery story that could only happen in New York City. Let’s laugh til we cry, dive into the weird, and grapple with the power of sex in this modern coming-of-something tale.

The Sadist, the Hitman and the Murder of Jane Bashara


George Hunter - 2018
    To his friends in Detroit’s affluent suburb of Grosse Pointe, he was a married father of two, Rotary Club President, church usher and soccer dad who organized charity events with his wife, Jane. To his “slaves,” he was “Master Bob,” a cocaine-snorting slumlord who operated a sex dungeon and had a submissive girlfriend to do his bidding—and he wanted more slaves to serve him. But Bashara knew he couldn’t rule a household of concubines on his income alone. He eyed his wife’s sizable retirement account and formulated a murderous plan. This meticulous account tells the complete story of the crime, the nationally watched investigation and trials, and the lives affected.

The Ducks In The Bathroom Are Not Mine: A decade of procrastination 2007 - 2017


David Thorne - 2017
     Includes Overdue Account, Walter's Cargo Shorts, Simon's Piecharts, Missing Missy, Obviously a Foggot, Formal Complaints, Justin’s Floodlight, Matthew’s Party, Permission Slip and many more.

The Bitchy Waiter: Tales, Tips & Trials from a Life in Food Service


Darron Cardosa - 2016
    Some only did it in college, or got out by sheer determination, good luck . . . or suicide. Others took it on as permanent employment. And many remain haunted by nightmare scenarios where they are the sole server in a restaurant packed with complaining patrons. For all those disenchanted current and former food service employees, Darron Cardosa has your back. His career began at a Texas steakhouse in 1984, and since 2008 he’s vented his frustrations in the popular blog The Bitchy Waiter. A snarky mix of David Sedaris, Anthony Bourdain, Erma Bombeck, and Mo Rocca, Cardosa distills 30 years of food service into dark, funny tales—about crazy customers, out-of-control egos, and what really goes on in that fancy restaurant—that anyone who worked in the industry will recognize and relate to.

Funny Jokes: Ultimate LoL Edition (Jokes, Dirty Jokes, Funny Anecdotes, Best jokes, Jokes for Adults)


Adam Smith - 2016
    « Funny Jokes » is one of the best compilations of jokes in English that will surely hold your attention. In this book you can find all sorts of jokes that will amuse you and will create a good mood for you. Have fun reading these hilarious jokes!

Heads in Beds: Hospitality and Tourism Marketing


Ivo Raza - 2004
    Heads in Beds gives insight into achieving best results by demystifing many misconceptions about marketing. Focusing on the practical side of managing hospitality and tourism marketing, this text includes several topics not covered anywhere else--marketing to travel agents, COOP marketing with wholesalers, and loyalty marketing. It provides readers with solid advice and strong direction. Heads In Beds is a book written for practitioners by a practitioner. So whether you are just starting a new job, a general manager, sales and marketing director, or a seasoned veteran looking for methods to increase your yield, the material in this book will help you manage the marketing function and generate better results. Other relevant job titles include: VPs and Directors of promotions, sales, destinations, and tourism, as well as hotel operators or innkeepers.

Don't Forget to Call Your Mama...I Wish I Could Call Mine


Lewis Grizzard - 1991
    In this book, Grizzard turns his attention to his mother, and to all mothers, casting a loving, comic eye toward the most important and defining relationship of all.

Marching Bands Are Just Homeless Orchestras


Tim Siedell - 2010
    The bookstore or library is half full of that kind of crap. What you're holding here is a collection of quips and observations with a refreshingly gloomy, sometimes twisted, always funny take on life. Or lack thereof.With illustrations by renowned artist Brian Andreas, this book is a glimpse inside the humorously askew mind of a writer whose witticisms have been featured on NPR, printed onto t-shirts, performed on stage in Germany, and posted online at the Washington Post, Wall Street Journal, and New York Times. He's been named one of the top funniest people on Twitter by the likes of Maxim, MSNBC and Mashable.

Rediscovering the Saints


Matthew Kelly - 2019
    And yet, we seem gripped by exasperation and paralyzed by the false belief that we can't do anything about it. The saints dispel that exasperation and inspire us to bold action. They remind us over and over again: We can change the world.

How to Move to Canada: A Discontented American's Guide to Canadian Relocation


André Du Broc - 2016
    If you or someone you know is discontented, distressed, or downright disturbed, maybe the Great White North is right for you, eh. But how much do you really know about Canada? Can you do a job that Canada needs (do you play hockey, drill for oil, or make poutine?)? Can you identify the best Canadian province for your lifestyle (lots of tundra or just some tundra?)? Can you master the proper pronunciation of "sorry"? What strange wizardry is the Canadian government? Is maple syrup acceptable substitution for currency? At long last, How to Move to Canada can help make your vague threat into a cold Canadian reality. This book is also full of activities such as: Color the flag of your new homeland Match the strange Canuck dialect with their local definitions And more! PLEASE NOTE: This is a humor book. It won't really help you emigrate. Rather, it's a subversive mix of real information on the Great White North plus a hilarious look at all the reasons why you won't like it there any better — and why they probably won't have you anyway.

Of Moose and Men: A Skewed Look at Life in Alaska


A.E. Poynor - 1999
    E. Poynor. For less than twenty percent of what you paid for that grande maple-choco-frappa-machacino latte you'll spew out your nose while reading this book, you can learn about an aspect of Alaska most people never think about: everyday life in Alaska. Of Moose and Men: A Skewed Look at Life in Alaska provides a unique insight into the Land of the Midnight Sun, where laughing about the trials unique to the country is better than giving up.

Chicken Soup for the Soul: Laughter is the Best Medicine: 101 Feel Good Stories


Amy Newmark - 2020
    This is storytelling at its funniest.If laughter is the best medicine, then this book is your prescription. Turn off the news and spend a few days not following current events. Instead, return to the basics—humanity’s ability to laugh at itself. Maybe you should even do a news cleanse for a few days! Hide under the covers and read these stories instead. Or read a chapter a day, or a story a day for 101 days. These pages contain the antidote to whatever is troubling you. They will definitely put you in a good mood. No one is safe from our writers— from spouses to parents to children to colleagues and friends. And of course the funniest of all are the stories they tell about their own mishaps and those “most embarrassing moments.” There’s no holding anything back in these pages, so prepare for lots of good, clean (and not so clean) fun.

Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet - Behind the Story (Backstage Pass to Novels)


Behind the Story Team - 2011
    Inspired by a hunger to know the story behind every good read and governed by the vision that what has transpired has a story to tell, we’ve brought Behind the Story™ for every book fan to enjoy.Our mission is to enable novel lovers all around the world to heighten and enrich their reading experience like they’ve never thought possible before… Begun “For the Fans, By the Fans“, we take our readers on a tour by the hand to show what is behind the curtains – what is “Behind the Story”That’s what makes us smile. Now, let us share it with you.Praises from: The "Behind the Story Effect"After reading a BTS... You feel inspired to follow your hearts and dreams... — ArshiI felt like the Behind the Story offered a new look into the book, and appreciated that, as most of the time, that angle is unexplored.— Aspiring AuthorEver been backstage at a concert? Here you go -- in written form.— Author, EditorI felt enriched with knowledge about the book, and I felt like I knew more about the book. — Aspiring AuthorIt makes me discover new things, and when I re-read the book, my emotions are different, deeper now that I understand what's behind the book.— KarlenI felt closer to the writer knowing more about them as a person and why they wrote what they wrote. — The Beta Reading ClubGet ready for one of the most unique experiences you will ever have...this is definitely CliffNotes and SparkNotes on Steroids. — Author, EditorSAMPLE EXCERPT:Inspiration is a hackneyed word in the creative writing world. All writers are inspired by something. Perhaps a better word to help phrase the question of ‘what inspired Jamie Ford to write his historical-fiction novel’ might be enthused, spurred, stimulated, or impassioned.The answer was a small red button pinned to Jamie’s father’s shirt that read: “I am Chinese.” A simple statement that became the title of the short story that grew into Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet—the same short story that his workshop editor urged him to turn into something bigger. The button distinguished Chinese residents from the Japanese community, the perceived enemy, whom the American government persecuted after the bombing of Pearl Harbor in 1941. It was the paranoia epidemic and the destruction of Japan towns across the United States that forms the historical backdrop of Ford’s novel.When Jamie’s father, an only child, passed away thus severing the links with his Asian heritage, he begin to explore his legacy and unearthed the histories that became the seeds of his novel. It was during his research about the Wah Mee club massacre in Seattle, that Ford encountered other people from his father’s generation who had had to wear the little red badge...

Stories from a Theme Park Insider


Robert Niles - 2011
    What time is the 3:00 parade? Why does a child need to be 40 inches tall to ride a roller coaster? What happens when the president of France gets lost inside Pirates of the Caribbean? A former employee, or "cast member", at Walt Disney World's Magic Kingdom answers these and other questions while sharing humorous stories about working inside the world's most popular theme park."Stories from a Theme Park Insider" takes you inside the park's famous tunnels and backstage for a look at how theme parks really work, and the funny moments and embarrassments that can happen when your work is someone else's vacation.

Tales from the Dad Side: Misadventures in Fatherhood


Steve Doocy - 2008
    Personally, I think the eye-catching cover shot of me in my pajamas is reason enough. (By the way, those are my real kids on the cover, and yes, those are my actual ankles. No, I'm not retaining water.)What you're holding in your hands is a very funny and sometimes remarkably poignant look at fathers, not from the mother's point of view or the child's, but from the dad's side. Which is why it's called Tales from the Dad Side.It's filled with stories of what it's like to be a dad and a son, from a child's first day of kindergarten to the awkward sex talk and right up to the day the always-practical dad tries to pay for college with bonus miles. I was there for every landmark in my children's lives, except the day I was on the riding lawn mower and missed my son's first words, which my wife insists were “trust fund.”As children get older, the lessons of the father get harder, like teaching my son how to shave just as my father taught me, with a rusty double-edged safety razor. At the end of my dad's lesson, I emerged from the bathroom nicked and gouged, looking like an extra from a Quentin Tarantino film. My more civilized son is a Norelco man. With my high-school-age daughters, I promised them a day on which I'd take them anywhere and do anything with them they wanted, expecting them to ask for dinner and a movie; I was horrified when they told me they wanted all of us to get manicures and pedicures together. That was not the answer I was expecting; it was like discovering Lou Dobbs was an illegal alien.Over the course of raising three children, I have learned with my wife that fathers are different from mothers. That could be the greatest understatement since Noah turned on the Weather Channel and found out that the next forty days called for a 20 percent chance of light rain.The truth is, fatherhood is like Wikipedia: some parts based in fact, others just made up along the way. And while bookstores are filled with tales of mothers, their children and families, there are few from the dad's side. Now, as a public service, I'm doing my part to right this wrong.I sincerely hope this answers your questions. If perhaps it's not exactly your cup of tea, I bet you've got a father or mother in your life who'd like the stone-cold truth about dads. Besides, for the same money, you can either put three gallons of gas in your car or take home this book, which has a highway rating of 29 smiles an hour.Steve Doocy