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    Fresh. Hilarious. Since we love laughing at funny jokes and pictures, we decided to create a series of books showcasing hilarious jokes we find throughout the day from all over the internet. We’ve even found some jokes in that old crusty sock you keep under your bed… Book is not appropriate for young kids. May have adult language or adult themes. Reader discretion is advised HAVE FUN! And let us know what you liked and where we can improve by leaving a review!

    Whether this is because they haven't yet mastered the 21st century phone or because they live to embarrass you throughout all forms of communication, Text Fails from Mum, is a hilarious collection of our all time favourite texts from Mum.Please stop changing the google logo so much, I like the original one.Mum I don't change the logo. Google changes it.On my computer, you don't run the Google?If I did I wouldn't be driving a 2004 Ford.Andy, I can't find my phone. Can you call it so I can try and track it down?I don't have time to be quippy, mum. It's in your hand.What? No it's not. I've got a bag of groceries in my hand. Are you saying it's in the grocery bag? How do you know these things!?WHAT ARE YOU TEXTING ME WITH!?Never mind! I found it! Thanks!This humour gift book is the laugh out loud answer to the annual conundrum what should I get Mum for Christmas, Mother's Day and her Birthday? Text Fails From Mum is the perfect stocking filler, and a gift all the family can relate to and enjoy.

    FICTION: Poolside at their motel, the Fab Four fell into conversation with a snappy-dressing local named Bert the Shirt, who listened as the band worked out a harmony to the most beautiful song he’d ever heard--and wouldn’t hear again for over half a century. FACT: That night, the Beatles played an unannounced free concert in the motel bar. Everyone was welcome. Local musicians showed up with guitars and keyboards, and had the once-in-a-lifetime experience of jamming with the Beatles till 4 am. This legendary event has forever after been known to Key West locals as THE PARADISE GIG.FICTION: Next day, hung over and exhausted, the Beatles left for the airport, having somehow lost a stained and battered notebook that held a priceless stash of unrecorded songs. NOW CUT TO THE PRESENT: A beautiful woman is doing a yoga headstand on a Key West beach when she’s abducted by a pair of thugs. An aspiring young singer is offered a recording deal that seems a bit too good to be true. Bad things happen to a couple of one-hit wonders…And old Bert hears a new song that is hauntingly familiar, but that he can’t quite place.Could it possibly be the same song he’d heard at poolside so many years before? Could it be that all the present mayhem circles back through the decades to THE PARADISE GIG? Could the precious, even sacred, Beatles notebook possibly turn up after all these years? Could Bert be the hero who would rediscover that stash of unheard songs for music lovers everywhere—and save a young singer’s life in the process? With Nacho, his intrepid Chihuahua, at his side, and with no one but bumbling detective Pete Amsterdam for an ally, the undaunted Bert the Shirt sets out through the Florida haze to piece it all together, learning along the way how much the world has changed—and how much it has not. In equal parts suspenseful and nostalgic, funny and romantic, this time-bending caper celebrates the power of music and the many tricks of memory, the joys of youth and the comforts of age, and the free and funky spirit of Key West.

    He has been a busy man. Yet, for the last two years, he has also managed to squeeze in a weekly column for The Times. Without fail, he sat down every week and wracked his brain to think of something to write 900 words about. Dispatches From the Sofa is the brilliant result. Alighting on such random topics as the potential demise of Margaret Thatcher, the love-hate relationship with your football club, Mike Read's musical of Oscar Wilde, fat pop stars, Serbian breakfast banter, the pleasures of air-guitar, the banking crisis and the evil phenomenon of Jedward, this is a thought-provoking, wide-reaching, hilarious and self-deprecating collection - which also includes the first two chapters from his unpublished novel - from one of our funniest, quickest and most beloved comedians.

    Do they know something that we don’t, or are we all just trying to figure it out? For so many of us, our hearts and minds still feel that we are twenty-something young women who can take on the world. But in our bodies, the flexibility and strength that were once taken for granted are far from how we remember them. Every day we have to rise above the creaky joints and achy knees to earn the opportunity of moving through the world with a modicum of grace. Yet we do rise, because it’s a privilege to grow old, and every single day is a gift. Peter Pan’s mantra was “never grow up”; our collective mantra should be “never stop growing.” This collection of user-friendly stories, essays, and philosophies invites readers to celebrate whatever age they are with a sense of joy and purpose and with a spirit of gratitude.

    The columnist-author sheds light on some of the important matters of life, such as the care of Willie Nelson albums and the problems of finding clean underwear when you live alone

     Sure, black men and women have been through four hundred years of slavery, oppression, murder, and watching white college students try to dance. But now that it's hip to have black friends, white people aren't sure how to go about it. And that is a real American tragedy. Thank God Nick Adams is here to help you avoid potential racial pitfalls and successfully make the transition from white to "aiight." Now, you'll know not to start a conversation with, "So, that new Jay-Z album is pretty great, right?" Or tell a co-worker he looks just like (fill in blank with name of dark-skinned person who works in the other building.) You'll know that a lot of black people you meet at parties or work functions don't care who played Thelma's husband on "Good Times," don't want to discuss the Malcolm X biography you just read and definitely don't want to listen to country music. Ever. Yes, it's a good thing Nick is here to explain. Because if we're going to live together in peace and harmony, you people are going to need help. Black People, Briefly Explained. A Q&A with Nick Adams Q: Nick, what is the correct term to use when addressing my new friends: Black or African-American?A: Personally, I always liked Afro-American. I liked being named after a 1970's hairdo. But then I wondered why we didn't become the Jheri-curled Americans or High Top Fade Americans. Q: Nick, if black people can use the "N" word as a term of endearment, can I, a white person, do so? A: No. I don't care if you have your hair in cornrows while wearing a Phat Farm t-shirt at an R. Kelly concert. Black people don't get to be president, and white people don't get to use the word nigger. Can we just call it even now? Q: Nick, I'd like to try slang. Is that okay? A: When you guys start using our words, that's when we know it's time for us to stop using them. Every time a white, middle-aged math teacher calls a student, "dog," black people all over the country are notified via email. Believe it. Q: Nick, surely you have to agree that Eminem is a hip-hop visionary? A: Let's try this one more time: Kurtis Blow, RUN-DMC, LL Cool J, Rakim, Chuck D, KRS-One, Tupac, Notorious B.I.G., Nas, Common, Mos Def, Bitch!

    Gill is an unashamedly intolerant perfectionist whose witty observations and scathing criticism have made him one of the most respected critics to walk through a restaurant's doors. 'Table Talk' is an idiosyncratic selection of A.A. Gill's writing about food, taken from his Sunday Times and Tatler columns.

    

    

    The story of a young man who finds himself somewhat unexpectedly a fine arts major in college, a fledgling sculptor in Chicago, a gadabout painter in Hoboken, and who eventually winds up a writer sometimes called "a born storyteller".The author of more than fifty books, Pinkwater now chronicles his own early life.

    The result was a classic column full of Bombecks signature wit and warmth. Now the beloved column that has hung on hundreds of refrigerator doors has been cheerily illustrated and designed as a handsome gift book, Eat Less Cottage and More Ice Cream. In it, Bombeck gently reminds us of what is really important in life: If I had my life to live over again I would have waxed less and listened more.I would have cried and laughed less while watching television . . . and more while watching real life.But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute of it . . . look at it and really see it . . . try it on . . . live it . . . exhaust it . . . and never give that minute back until there was nothing left of it. . . . Long-time fans of Erma Bombeck will be thrilled to have this favorite column in the form of a beautiful keepsake. Readers discovering Bombeck for the first time will become fans instantly. Eat Less Cottage and More Ice Cream offers wisdom to inspire all of us.

    But are they? He is probably the only man who has ever requested the recipe for an airline’s lasagna or wanted to enjoy his flight with an inflatable rubber woman sat on his knee. Prepare to meet the man who must have his diet of stir-fried mulberry leaves accommodated and the man who left his false teeth on a flight and is sure he recognized them on a later flight—in a flight attendant's mouth. Ravenscroft's correspondence tackles travel annoyances like excess baggage charges alongside more surreal letters, such as the one starting out asking an Australian airline if they offer an authentic Australian experience (for instance, Australian cuisine or in-flight movies) which then moves on to the question of at what age a baby is safe from being swallowed by a dingo.

    It is said that traffic on British motorways came to a complete standstill as commuters were forced to stop their cars due to fits of laughter while listening to it on Radio Four. This book is an affectionate account of a four-year friendship, including copious anecdotes from their time together in the commentary box and during their travels overseas. Jonathan Agnew comments: "Brian Johnston was a tremendous influence on my early years at Test Match Special. His wit, warmth, and great sense of fun was not only a feature of his cricket commentary, but also in the way he lived his life. Our friendship has been immortalized through the "leg over" incident, but there was a much deeper bond between us than merely that hilarious broadcasting classic, and I am thrilled to have the opportunity to share this with cricket lovers everywhere." Aggers on Johnners is the holy grail of cricket books, a must-have for anyone who loves the noble game.