"The Measly Middle Ages" portrays life as it really was in the days when knights were bold and the peasants were revolting.

    In other words, perfect." - The Huffington PostAn amusing and captivating tale that's a delightful primer for laughing at the inevitable: If you're a dinosaur, all of your friends are dead. If you're a pirate, all of your friends have scurvy. If you're a tree, all of your friends are end tables. Each page of this laugh-out-loud, illustrated humor book showcases the downside of being everything from a clown to a cassette tape to a zombie. Cute and dark all at once, this hilarious children's book for adults teaches valuable lessons about life.From the sock whose only friends have gone missing to the houseplant whose friends are being slowly killed by irresponsible plant owners (like you), All My Friends Are Dead presents hilariously entertaining stories about life and existential predicaments.The simple yet effective imagery, the personification of inanimate objects, and short, hilarious quips come together to create an amusing adventure through each character's unique grievance and wide-eyed dilemmas.Written by Avery Monsen, an actor, artist, and writer and Jory John, a writer, editor, and journalist. They are friends, and neither is dead. Yet.All My Friends Are Dead is both the saddest funny book and the funniest sad book you'll ever read.Children's book written for adults Displayed in an accessible cartoon form

    One Martin. Martin Boyle already has plenty to worry about. His germaphobic mother keeps him home from school if she hears so much as a sneeze, and his father is always off somewhere reenacting old war battles. Julia, the most beautiful girl in school, won’t even speak to Martin, and the gym teacher is officially out to get him. Which is why Martin really doesn’t need this curse hanging over his head. On a trip to the family cemetery, Martin wanders among the tombstones of his ancestors and discovers a disturbing pattern: when one Martin is born, the previous Martin dies. And—just his luck—Martin’s aunt is about to give birth to a baby boy, who will, according to tradition, be named Martin. Martin must find a way to break the curse, but every clue seems to lead to a dead end. And time is running out.

    Rowling, magical illustrations from Jim Kay and weird, wonderful and inspiring artefacts that have been magically released from the archives at the British Library. This spellbinding book takes readers on a journey through the Hogwarts curriculum, including Herbology, Defence Against the Dark Arts, Astronomy, Divination and more. Discover the truth behind making the Philosopher's Stone, create your very own potion and uncover the secret of invisible ink. Learn all about the history of mandrake roots and dragons, discover what witches really used their brooms for, pore over incredible images of actual mermaids and read about real-life potions, astronomers and alchemists. The perfect gift for aspiring witches and wizards and any Harry Potter fan. Celebrating twenty years of Harry Potter magic, and produced in association with the British Library to support their major exhibition, Harry Potter: A History of Magic.Contents:The magical world of Harry Potter --The journey --Potions and alchemy --Herbology --Charms --Astronomy --Divination --Defence against the dark arts --Care of magical creatures --Past, present, future --The British Library --J. K. Rowling.

    He's confronted the HOA. He's even taken on Santa himself. He doesn't usually win. These are the tales of the Dumb White Husband and they are all available here in this collected edition.This handsome volume includes:Dumb White Husband vs. the Grocery Store - John would rather sit and watch the game, but his wife needs some things at the store. Can he complete the list and get back in time to see the end of the game?Dumb White Husband vs. Halloween - Every Halloween, Chris has the scariest house on the block and gives out the best candy. But, this year, someone is showing him up and he'll stop at nothing to find out who.Dumb White Husband vs. Santa - Erik has planned the perfect Christmas for his family. The plan is foolproof, bulletproof and flame retardant. Nothing can undo the hours of planning and preparation. Nothing except maybe odd-shaped packages, ill-timed fruitcakes or an errant neighborhood Santa Claus.Dumb White Husband vs. the Tooth Fairy - Erik always has a plan and he's sure he would have figured out the whole Tooth Fairy thing eventually. But, when his three-year-old son takes a frisbee to the mouth, he's forced to speed things up. Between neighborhood kids with big mouths and unhelpful dentists he's going to need to improvise. Will he bend to the pressure of inflation? Will he get caught in the act? And, what do you do with those teeth anyway?Dumb White Husband for President (A novella) - There comes a time in every man's life when he must stand for the things he believes in. John doesn't believe in bagging his grass. So, when a new allergy-prone neighbor gets the HOA to require it, there's only one thing he can do - run for President of The Creeks of Sage Valley Phase II.John, Chris and Erik put aside most of their differences to run a campaign that they hope will see John elected as President and end the meddling of the rule-loving new kid on the block. Will they succeed? It's doubtful.

    Funny Rhyming Picture Book for Beginner ReadersSuitable for ages 2-8Beautifully Illustrated Story that will have both parents and children laughing out loud!Find out what happened to this family when Mom gets fed up and decides to stop doing all the chores.How will the family cope when they are so used to Mom doing so much for them?What happens next is hilarious, but also includes a valuable lesson for the entire family, even the cat and dog!What would you do if your Mommy quit on you?You and your children will love how the family resolves the issue in this adorable and humorous tale.

    Overzealous hall monitors. Un-kicked footballs. It’s the Peanuts gang you know and love, and everyone’s at it again. Lucy is offering her trademark 5¢ psychiatric advice—and her customers are wondering if it’s actually worth the pennies. Snoopy’s dinner bowl has been thrown deep into enemy territory—and he will do anything to avoid retrieving it from the neighbor’s cat. Finally, our hero must work alongside the little red-haired girl, his secret crush, for a school project…can you guess how that will turn out? You’ll find old tricks and new antics in this latest collection of the world-renowned comics.   First published in 1950, the classic Peanuts strip now appears in more than 2,200 newspapers in 75 countries in 25 languages. Phrases such as “security blanket” and “good grief,” which originated in the Peanuts world, are now part of the global vernacular, and images of Charles Schulz's classic characters—Charlie Brown kicking the football, Lucy leaning over Schroeder's piano—are now universally recognized.

    You know where you can go? The f**k to sleep.”Go the Fuck to Sleep is a book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate, and radically honest, it captures the familiar—and unspoken—tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night. Read by a host of celebrities, from Samuel L. Jackson to Jennifer Garner, this subversively funny bestselling storybook will not actually put your kids to sleep, but it will leave you laughing so hard you won’t care.

     - They do not need to be read in order! - These books are perfect for almost all Minecraft fans, starting from children ages 8 and up! The following books are included in this Minecraft Boxed Set: Trapped in Minecraft: Spud’s Thrilling Adventure in the Overworld Trapped in Minecraft starts with Spud, a perfectly normal kid, who gets home and plays his Minecraft game. Like most nights, he plays for as long as he can. But this time, he soon finds himself trapped inside the Minecraft game, fighting for his survival. Will Spud escape or become another victim to Minecraft? Stories from the Skylands This story starts with our main characters, Rozzie & Greyson, tricking their parents into letting them hunt for secret treasure on Shell Mountain. Once they reach the mountain, however, they are transported to a strange, dangerous world – the Skylands! Filled with floating islands, weird creatures and dangerous obstacles, the Skylands make Rozzie and Greyson wish they were back at home under the covers! Escape from Minecraft: Buck Descends into the Caves Buck was having another normal night, playing Minecraft in hopes that his mom would stop bothering him. The longer he plays, however, the more he realizes he is being transported into the game! Soon he is in the caves, battling angry creepers and scary zombies. Will Buck be able to lead his group through the spooky Minecraft caves and get back to the real world? Herobrine Invades the Overworld The Overworld has been swarmed and civilization destroyed by massive hordes of attacking Creepers. Someone is behind it – and some say it’s Herobrine. Our three heroes, Tone Dead, Fumbles, and Moose, form a deadly team and fight their way through horde after horde. Finally, they encounter the legendary Herobrine. But Herobrine wasn’t exactly who they thought… Click “Add to Cart” To Get This 4-in-1 Boxed Set Deal & Save BIG!

    Then came the Carpet . . . That’s the old story everyone knows and loves. But now the Carpet is home to many different tribes and peoples, and there’s a new story in the making. The story of Fray, sweeping a trail of destruction across the Carpet. The story of power-hungry mouls—and of two brothers who set out on an adventure to end all adventures when their village is flattened.It’s a story that will come to a terrible end—if someone doesn't do something about it. If everyone doesn’t do something about it . . .First published in 1971, this hilarious and wise novel marked the debut of the phenomenal Sir Terry Pratchett. Years later, Sir Terry revised the work, and this special collectable edition includes the updated text, his original color and black-and-white illustrations, and an exclusive story—a forerunner to The Carpet People created by the seventeen-year-old nascent writer who would become one of the world's most beloved storytellers.

    Seuss have helped many a child (and grownup) along the complicated road of life. For those who need reminders, here is a collection of some of the good doctor's wisest and wittiest sayings, on subjects as varied as "Equality and Justice" and "Facing Up to Adversity" to "The Art of Eating" and "The First Nerd"! A perfect gift for all occasions, ideal for sharing among generations--now with a "gift tag" on the jacket flap for consumers to personalize!

    . . . losing your diary is the WORST!! Then I decided that until I find it, I totally HAD to put together a list of important diary-keeping lessons to remember in case of missing diary emergencies like this one.This diary is full of tips from me on fun things to write about in your diary, with space for you to write and draw your own entries. Meanwhile, my BFFs Chloe and Zoey, my ANNOYING little sister Brianna, my crush Brandon (sighhh), and mean girl MacKenzie are all involved in the search for my real diary, with plenty of adventures along the way! SQUEEE!!!

    When, as a result of "the Loosening," the precious family heirloom, the Luggertuck Lump (quite literally a lump), goes missing, the Luggertucks look for someone to blame. Is it Horton Halfpott, the good-natured but lowly kitchen boy who can't tell a lie? Or one of the many colorful cast members in this silly romp of a mystery.

    All they do is sit in their cages, eat carrots, and poop. Then his annoying little sister blackmails him into hiding a bunny in his closet. She knows what really happened to his "stolen" bike and she's threatening to tell. Now Drew’s in a real jam. If his "No pets!" parents find the rabbit or, worse, his sister blabs the truth, he'll be grounded till grade seven for sure. And if that’s not enough trouble, two girls at school drag him into a prank war that goes from bad to worse (all the rabbit’s fault). Plus, the weirdest girl in his class wants to be his science partner. If she tells him she wants to be his girlfriend, he just knows he’s gonna die. Drew must find a way to outwit the mean girls, wiggle out of the blackmail deal, and get rid of the rabbit before it destroys his bedroom and his life.

    On this particular day the whole valley seemed to rejoice in the fullness of the season—but suddenly Barbara and Regina’s peaceful frontier life is changed forever. General Braddock and his army had been defeated and soon the Pennsylvania settlers would suffer the bloody effects of the French and Indian War. On October 16, 1755, a band of Indians, led by Allegheny warriors, stormed through Buffalo Valley, burned the Leiningers’ log cabin, and captured the sisters. Few survived the Penn’s Creek Massacre and even fewer lived to tell the story. Regina makes a promise to her older sister just before they are unwillingly separated—each to endure different fates. Barbara is taken deep into the wilderness, but holds on to the hope that she will find her little sister. Though she is adopted into the Indian tribe, there is a longing deep inside that cannot be denied. She must escape—but the penalty if caught is certain death. No one expresses Barbara’s apprehensions better than her own words, written in 1759: “If one could not believe that there is a God, who helps and saves from death, one had better let running away alone...The extreme probability that the Indians would pursue and recapture us, was two to one compared with the dim hope that, perhaps, we would get through...even if we did escape the Indians, how would we ever succeed in passing through the wilderness, unacquainted with a single path or trail…"