In essays drawn from her witty and sometimes brutally candid column in the New York Observer, Candace Bushnell introduces us to the young and beautiful who travel in packs from parties to bars to clubs. Meet "Carrie," the quintessential young writer looking for love in all the wrong places..."Mr. Big," the business tycoon who drifts from one relationship to another..."Samantha Jones," the fortyish, successful, "testosterone woman" who uses sex like a man...not to mention "Psycho Moms," "Bicycle Boys," "International Crazy Girls," and the rest of the New Yorkers who have inspired one of the most watched TV series of our time. You've seen them on HBO, now read the book that started it all...

    The first of these came out in 1946: the ever famous "How to be an Alien." Later he enlarges the picture with "How to be inimitable" and "How to be Decadent." All three books were illustrated by the master of the cartoonists' art, the late Nicolas Bentley. Here they are, all in one volume, which will make life much easier for today's would-be Brits than it was for those who pervaded them. It is said that a few of the latter actually failed to become indistinguishable from the genuine British article because they found it too tiresome to seek out three separate books: a misfortune that need never again occur to anyone.

    The pages overflow with humor and an array of cool phrases that will have readers bending and sending, blowing soup, and gargling gravy all the way to the bathroom!

    In between watching his TiVo, he manages to make and release Clerks II, relate the story of his partner-in-crime Jason Mewes’ heroin addiction, get a tattoo, serve on a jury... and get caught stealing donuts from Burt ReynoldsThrown in are his views on the perils of strip clubs, the drawback of threesomes, the pain of anal fissures, his love-affair with Star Wars and so much more! Adults Only!

    . . and then broke? How would you survive? Could you improve on humanity's original timeline? And how hard would it be to domesticate a giant wombat? With this book as your guide, you'll survive--and thrive--in any period in Earth's history. Bestselling author and time-travel enthusiast Ryan North shows you how to invent all the modern conveniences we take for granted--from first principles. This illustrated manual contains all the science, engineering, art, philosophy, facts, and figures required for even the most clueless time traveler to build a civilization from the ground up. Deeply researched, irreverent, and significantly more fun than being eaten by a saber-toothed tiger, How to Invent Everything will make you smarter, more competent, and completely prepared to become the most important and influential person ever.

    Each entry includes full technical details, a complete development history, in-depth analysis, and a riveting fictionalized account of the invention's success or failure on the battlefield.Dive under the Atlantic in the turreted U-Cruiser, or rule its surface from an aircraft carrier made out of ice. Shred bomber formations in a high-performance flying wing fighter and then rocket to your untimely end from the cockpit of your very own suicide missile.We've got a pair of German armored land vehicles for you that are so large they had to be powered by naval engines! My Tank Is Fight! delivers the thrilling action of the Second World War - as it might have been - with a touch of humor and a lack of class.

    THE AUDACITY OF HYPE brings together his views on diverse subjects, ranging from wickedly funny pen portraits of the sometimes loveable, usually despicable chumps who like to think of themselves as our political elite, and their bonkers schemes to save the world that are in fact likely to do us more harm than a pile of witches, to WMD, disaster movies, the pitfalls of 'I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here' and the high and mighty rhetoric of Obama, this is an absurdly entertaining and utterly indispensable collection from one of Britain's most brilliant satirists.

    It is filled with quips and quotes that represent the Code of the West, like: "Always drink upstream from the herd" and "The easiest way to eat crow is while it's still warm. The colder it gets, the harder it is to swallow."

    In this deliciously dark volumeoh-so-appropriately shaped like a tombstoneyoull find hundreds of fatal factoids about death and dying, on everything from bizarre funeral rites and rituals from cultures across the world to how many American presidents have died on the Fourth of July to the cold-hard stats on the way youre most likely to meet your maker. (You might wanna earmark that page.) Stuffed with entertaining trivia about the one thing you can be sure of in life and hilariously, horrifyingly illustrated throughout, The Pocket Book of Death is a marvelously morbid guide to kicking the bucket.

      As the nation’s iconic calendar, the 2020 edition will forecast cultural, culinary, and other life-changing trends; preview notable astronomical events; provide time- and money-saving tips for gardeners of all varieties; set the hook for best fishing days; forecast traditionally 80 percent–accurate weather; and cover a range of related topics, including anniversaries, folklore, husbandry, home remedies, recipes, amusement, contests, and more—too much more to mention—all in the inimitable way it has done since 1792.

    These ads prove that even if you’re lonely, you don’t have to be boring, as advertisers in this book demand much more than long walks on the beach from their potential mates. .Arranged by theme (“The Usual Hyperbole and a Whiff of Playful Narcissism”), and including footnotes to obscure references, Sexually I’m More of a Switzerland promises to be, like its predecessor, “a bracing splash of cold reality in the flushed face of romance” ( Chicago Tribune )..

    When Making Cocoa for Kingsley Amis was first published, it catapulted its author into the bestseller lists and established her as one of our funniest and most eloquent of poets.'Cope has an extraordinary canny sense - quite rare among poets - of what will engage a reader's attention.' Poetry Review'A jet-age Tennyson.' London Review of Books'Like Larkin and Harrison, Cope has proven that a popular poetry is possible without compromising quality.' Acumen Series

    She puts the English national character under her anthropological microscope, and finds a strange and fascinating culture, governed by complex sets of unspoken rules and byzantine codes of behaviour. The rules of weather-speak. The ironic-gnome rule. The reflex apology rule. The paranoid-pantomime rule. Class indicators and class anxiety tests. The money-talk taboo and many more ...Through a mixture of anthropological analysis and her own unorthodox experiments (using herself as a reluctant guinea-pig), Kate Fox discovers what these unwritten behaviour codes tell us about Englishness.

    That's what actress and writer Annabelle Gurwitch discovered when she was fired by her idol Woody Allen ("You look retarded"). She confided her tale of woe to her friend Felicity Huffman, who made Annabelle laugh with her own stories. Annabelle realized that there was a world of people out there waiting to laugh at the experience that virtually everyone shares, and she began to collect stories of being fired from friends and colleagues. Soon she was contributing regular "Fired!" segments to "Day to Day" on NPR and gathering friends to appear with her in sold-out performances of "Fired!" in Los Angeles and New York. "Fired!," her documentary film inspired by these stories, comes out in 2006. This book is a collection of hilarious but true tales from people who've all gotten the ax, the boot, or been canned at some point in their lives. In "That's a Fact," Andy Borowitz tells the story of being fired as a writer for the television sitcom "The Facts of Life" after being informed that he just didn't "get" Tootie. "Take that hanger off your head, you idiot!" were the last words Jeff Garlin heard before being fired from Spec's Music store after only one day on the job, just one of the many firings he recounts in "That Garlin Boy." In "Jimmy the Idiot," Dana Gould sums up his firing from the cast of the sitcom "Working" that led him to become a producer of "The Simpsons": "In the second episode, I was a math genius, in the third -- a motocross racer, and in the fourth episode I was replaced by a chimp, but nobody noticed." In "Poor Judgment," Illeana Douglas tells about being fired after a few hours of working as a coat check girl: "How isit possible to be fired from hanging coats? I have arms. I know what coats are. I don't come home and throw my coat on the floor. I hang it in a closet. I have experience." How did Bob Saget find out he was being phased out of his job on "The Morning Program"? "One day I showed up and my hosting chair was gone!"With an all-star cast from Tim Allen to Morgan Spurlock, from Anne Meara to David Cross, and contributions from people from all over the country, this book proves it's not the bounce that counts, it's the bounce back.

    . .On April 15, 1865, Abraham Lincoln updated his status: "Taking the missus to the theater"God and Stephen Hawking trolled each other in a comment war over the creation of the universe?Alexander the Great "checked into" all the countries he conqueredIrreverent and clever, The History of the World According to Facebook goes back through time, from the beginning of the world to the present, to cover all the major events and eras of human history, such as the Renaissance, the Industrial Revolution, and the Information Age. Filled with hundreds of actual figures from across the centuries and thousands of invented statuses, comments, and actions lampooning Facebook users’ penchant for oversharing, abbreviation, self-importance, and lazy jargon, The History of the World According to Facebook defies all attempts at taking the multi-billion user social media platform SRSLY. It is the funniest parody of history and the dawn of man since, well, the dawn of man.