What I found was that she hadn't kept some of it. She had kept all of it - every bus ticket, postcard, school report - from the moment I was born to the moment I finally had the confidence to turn round and say 'Why is our house full of this shit?'Sadly, a recycling 'incident' destroyed the bulk of this archive. This has meant two things: firstly, Dear Reader, you will never get to see countless drawings of wizards, read a poem about corn on the cob, or marvel at the kilos of brown flowers I so lovingly pressed as a child. Secondly, it's left me with no choice but to actually write this thing myself.This, my first ever book, will answer questions such as 'Is Mary Berry real?', 'Is it true you wear a surgical truss?' and 'Is a non-spherically symmetric gravitational pull from outside the observable universe responsible for some of the observed motion of large objects such as galactic clusters in the universe?'Most of this book is true. I have, of course, amplified my more positive characteristics in an effort to make you like me. Thank you for reading.

    You’re going to want to take notes.” Jobless, heartbroken and broke, new college graduate Laila Lucent packs up her car and drives alone across the country to her new life as a Las Vegas stripper. In an empowering, intelligent and hilarious memoir of self-discovery, 22-year-old Laila takes us deep inside the best, most infamous, strip club in Las Vegas, the Spearmint Rhino. From living with homeless drug addicts, to practicing yoga on the beaches of Costa Rica, from threesomes with wealthy foreigners, to dancing at the best music festivals in the world, The Yoga Stripper is a wickedly funny reverse fairy tale where morality is flexible, money is fast, and clothing is discouraged.

    Let me add another to the list: the moment I sang a duet to the the "Macarena" with Timmy Mallett, live to millions of people...'Sacked from his high-profile job as a national newspaper editor, Piers Morgan dived helplessly into the world of celebrity. But even twenty years of commenting on the lives of the rich and famous couldn't prepare him for the extraordinary world he uncovered...A riveting, scandelous and brutally honest account of one man's quest for celebrity, Don't You Know Who I Am? lifts the lid on the egos and outrageous behaviour of everyone from Paris Hilton to Cherie Blair, Kate Moss to the legend that is the Hoff.

    During the last three years of their stay, Jacquie Richards co-owned a restaurant and boarding house in the sea-side resort town of Swakopmund. This book follows the owners and boarders of J.J.'s through heartfelt trials and tribulations with memories of unique people and captivating experiences. A compelling page-turner that is well worth the read!

    Not ready to settle down and in need of an escape from her fast-paced job as a sitcom writer, Kristin instead traveled the world, often alone, for several weeks each year. In addition to falling madly in love with the planet, Kristin fell for many attractive locals, men who could provide the emotional connection she wanted without costing her the freedom she desperately needed. Kristin introduces readers to the Israeli bartenders, Finnish poker players, sexy Bedouins, and Argentinean priests who helped her transform into "Kristin-Adjacent" on the road–a slower, softer, and, yes, sluttier version of herself at home.

    There is also nothing more annoying. Who else can proudly insist that you’re perfect while simultaneously making you question every career, fashion, and relationship decision you have ever made?   No one understands the delicate mother-daughter dynamic better than Kate Siegel—her own mother drove her so crazy that she decided to broadcast their hilarious conversations on Instagram. Soon, hundreds of thousands of people were following their daily text exchanges, eager to see what outrageous thing Kate’s mom would do next. Now, in Mother, Can You NOT?, Kate pays tribute to the woman who invented the concept of drone parenting.  From embarrassing moments (like crashing Kate's gynecological exams) to outrageous stories (like the time she made Kate steal a cat from the pound) to hilarious celebrations (including but not limited to parties for Kate's menstrual cycles), Mother, Can you NOT? lovingly lampoons the lengths to which our mothers will go to better our lives (even if it feels like they’re ruining them in the process).

    The captain and officers all abandoned ship, leaving the few remaining castaways to fend for themselves as the boat toppled onto its side and water flooded into the passenger decks.In the wee hours of the night, newlyweds Benji Smith and Emily Lau feared for their lives, desparate and terrified after a malfunctioning lifeboat left them stranded on the sinking ship. By this point, the other lifeboats had all gone. They had been left behind.This thoughtful memoir — hailed by The Daily Telegraph as "a compelling, minute-by-minute account of the chaotic evacuation" — tells the remarkable story of the couple's harrowing escape, as they clung to a rope and rapelled down the hull of the doomed vessel.But the astonishing story continues, as they find themselves stranded in Rome and ignored by the United States Embassy. With only the clothes on their backs, they relied upon the kindness of strangers to help them find food and shelter, clothing and medical attention. And finally a ticket home.But even then, in the safety of their own home, they would find their sleep haunted by nightmares and their days crippled by anxiety and insecurity. And even as they struggled to overcome PTSD, they would simultaneously find themselves in a battle with the news media to even have their story told.Praised by Newsweek/The Daily Beast for its "honest reflection and frightening detail", this gripping, triumphant story is ultimately a spiritual tale, the story of a pair of survivors who find hope and meaning in the aftermath of a tragedy.

    How I wished I could've let go and allowed the tears to spill. But I knew that if I had cried, Mama would've asked me what the matter was. And if I had told her the truth, she would've said that I was lying. And if she thought that I was lying . . . well, you know the rest.Still, I wonder . . . did she know?Did anyone know? Didn't everyone know?"Lucy Green Eyes is based on the true-life story of Merlene McDaniel as told from her eyes growing up in the segregated South. Although Merlene spends much of her early years dodging the stinging switches of an overly-strict grandmother, yearning for the embrace of a part-time mother, hoping for a smile from an oncoming stranger, or running from dirty old men, her inner strength allows her to ride on the wings of endless hope, and we can't help but ride along.

    This final volume candidly explores the pertinent societal question: how does an ill-equipped adult child of alcoholics navigate life after a childhood fraught with abuse, scarcity and neglect? Continuing her engrossing journey from the moment City of Angeles ends, Glynn Brown shares the vignettes of her life - replete with enlightening mistakes, edifying consequences, forgiveness and personal redemption. Big As All Hell And Half Of Texas is an honest and inspirational account of Glynn Brown's ultimately successful battles with depression, divorce, single parenting, and ill-fitting love affairs."This memoir is a journey in self-examination lived not as a victim but as a searcher always hoping that the universe will smile the next day. The author asks several questions of herself. Perhaps the most searing query is, "Why am I not enough?" The answer suggested is that finding someone who sees any one of us as enough is a challenge that may consume a lifetime. And, perhaps, even more critically, is that moment when we find that we are more adequate than we believed, that those who reject are more deeply wounded or lost than we imagined. Marlayna's tale is compelling, painful, joyous, and riveting." - R. Vincent

    I did not write this book for sympathy or notoriety; I wrote it in an attempt to shed light on the ghosts that have haunted me for a lifetime, hoping that by putting them down on paper that I could look at them more objectively from a mature point of view and eventually free myself from them.

    ‘Why you not stay with me tonight—in my cave.’ He seemed enthusiastic. And we were looking for adventure." Thus begins the story of how Marguerite van Geldermalsen—a New Zealand-born nurse—became the wife of Mohammad Abdallah Othman, a Bedouin souvenir-seller of the Manaja tribe, and lived with him and their children in a community of 100 families in the ancient caves of Petra in Jordan. Marguerite and a friend were traveling through the Middle East in 1978 when she met the charismatic Mohammad and decided that he was the man for her. Their home was a lofty 2,000 year-old cave carved into the red rock of a hillside. She became the resident nurse and learned to live like the Bedouin—cooking over fires, hauling water on donkeys, and drinking sweet black tea—and over the years she became as much of a curiosity as the cave-dwellers to tourists. This is her extraordinary story.

    Building on the critical success of Dancing Barefoot and Just A Geek, he has collected more of his own favorite stories in his third book, The Happiest Days of Our Lives. These are the stories Wil loves to tell, because they are the closest to his heart: stories about being a huge geek, passing his geeky hobbies and values along to his own children, and vividly painting what it meant to grow up in the ’70s and come of age in the ’80s as part of the video game/D&D/BBS/Star Wars figures generation.Within the pages of The Happiest Days of Our Lives, you will find:● “The Butterfly Tree”: how one Back to School night continues to shape Wil’s sense of social justice, thirty years later● “Blue Light Special”: the greatest challenge a ten year-old could face in 1982: save his allowance, or buy Star Wars figures?● “A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Geek”: why fantasy role-playing games are such an important part of Wil’s past – and his present● “The Big Goodbye”: a visit to Paramount gives Wheaton a second chance to say farewell to Star Trek . . . properly, this time● “Let Go”: a moving eulogy for a beloved friendIn all of these tales, Wheaton brings the reader into the raw heart of the story, holding nothing back, and you are invited to join him on a journey through The Happiest Days of Our Lives.

    More can happen to Monica in one week than most people experience in a year, from facing down psychopathic drug dealers to the FBI threatening to put her in the Witness Protection Program or the SWAT team appearing to rescue her from a man she's done with, and every story is as true as it is strange. Get ready for an exciting ride that takes you from the depths of drug addiction to the pinnacle of high society only to end up six feet under.

    In the battle of his life over the ragingly successful music label he had helped found, Ruthless Records, Heller had seen death threats, strong-arming, and beatings. Now the violence had come home when his enemies burglarized his house, jacked his Corvette, and left behind this sneering piece of graffito.Heller didn't get mad; he got even. "Ruthless" tells the explosive story of Jerry Heller's alliance with Eric Wright, aka Eazy-E, one of the legends of rap music and a founding member of N.W.A., "the world's most dangerous band." As a longtime music industry superagent, Heller had the skill and insight necessary to guide N.W.A.'s cometlike rise to the top of the charts. Along the way there were raucous nationwide tours, out-of-control MTV pool parties, and X-rated business meetings. Heller held on through the brutal shocks and reversals of the Ruthless Records era, which saw the label being targeted by the FBI, and its principal artists locked in bitter conflict, until a final turnaround placed Ruthless at the top of the heap once more. Always in the middle of the whirlwind were Jerry and Eazy, an odd-couple pairing that represents one of the deepest and most appealing stories in American music.You don't have to be an N.W.A. fan to love "Ruthless," Heller turns the music industry inside out, exposing its strange logic and larger-than-life personalities. "Ruthless" provides keen insight into the popular music scene, with an unforgettable portrait of its rollicking excesses, life-churning drama, and multimillion-dollar highs.

    The Bitch In the House.Women today have more choices than at any time in history, yet many smart, ambitious, contemporary women are finding themselves angry, dissatisfied, stressed out. Why are they dissatisfied? And what do they really want? These questions form the premise of this passionate, provocative, funny, searingly honest collection of original essays in which twenty-six women writers—ranging in age from twenty-four to sixty-five, single and childless or married with children or four times divorced—invite readers into their lives, minds, and bedrooms to talk about the choices they’ve made, what’s working, and what’s not.With wit and humor, in prose as poetic and powerful as it is blunt and dead-on, these intriguing women offer details of their lives that they’ve never publicly revealed before, candidly sounding off on:• The difficult decisions and compromises of living with lovers, marrying, staying single and having children• The perpetual tug of war between love and work, family and career• The struggle to simultaneously care for ailing parents and a young family• The myth of co-parenting• Dealing with helpless mates and needy toddlers• The constrictions of traditional women’s roles as well as the cliches of feminism• Anger at laid-back live-in lovers content to live off a hardworking woman’s checkbook• Anger at being criticized for one’s weight• Anger directed at their mothers, right and wrong• And–well–more anger...“This book was born out of anger,” begins Cathi Hanauer, but the end result is an intimate sharing of experience that will move, amuse, and enlighten. The Bitch in the House is a perfect companion for your students as they plot a course through the many voices of modern feminism. This is the sound of the collective voice of successful women today-in all their anger, grace, and glory.