Book picks similar to
Every Time We Meet at the Dairy Queen, Your Whole Fucking Face Explodes by Carlton Mellick III
horror
bizarro
bizarro-fiction
bizzaro
The Flatshare
Beth O'Leary - 2019
Leon Twomey works nights and needs cash. Their friends think they’re crazy, but it’s the perfect solution: Leon occupies the one-bed flat while Tiffy’s at work in the day, and she has the run of the place the rest of the time. But with obsessive ex-boyfriends, demanding clients at work, wrongly imprisoned brothers and, of course, the fact that they still haven’t met yet, they’re about to discover that if you want the perfect home you need to throw the rulebook out the window…
The Naughty Never Die (Seduction #2)
L.L. Kellogg - 2013
Acting as her father's official hostess in the governor's mansion is tantamount to living in a fishbowl, which makes S-E-X extremely difficult. On the brink of a nervous breakdown, frustrated Josie loses her usual good sense along with her cool and lets her assemblyman boyfriend sweet-talk her into an impromptu romantic getaway--something she would never consider if she had a clue someone is trying to kill her.The Beast--an incurable bad boy who refuses to admit beneath his scars lurks a hero.A deliberately twisted message, via the governor's spiteful assistant, misleads ex Special Forces officer, DJ Ryder, as to the true objective of his freelance assignment. He's told to, not only track down the governor's classy daughter and hold her in protective custody, but to also teach her a lesson by letting her believe she's been kidnapped.When Josie discovers the scarred, but still sexy, badass has played her for a fool, she retaliates by feigning a raging case of Stockholm syndrome, teasing the brute until all he can think of is the 'hold her' part of his orders. How can Ryder concentrate on keeping Josie safe when he's busy avoiding the danger she poses to his heart?NOTE: This book has an extra high sensuality level and is not for those seeking a 'sweet' romance.
The Closer You Come
Gena Showalter - 2015
And now, he has only one goal: stay out of trouble. Strawberry Valley, Oklahoma, sounds like the perfect place for him and his two brothers-by-circumstance to settle down and live a nice, simple life. But model citizen isn’t exactly this rugged bachelor’s default setting—especially when it comes to a certain hot-blooded Southern beauty… Brook Lynn Dillon has always been responsible. Not that it’s done her much good. The down-on-her-luck waitress is broke, single and fun-deprived. Until Jase comes along. He is dangerous, stunningly protective, breathtakingly sexy and as tempting as sin, and the passion sizzling between them is undeniable. But can it melt her resistance? After all, the right kind of trouble might be just what they both need.
Darkhouse
Karina Halle - 2011
Though she’s been dealing with a quarter-life crisis and post-college syndrome like any other twenty-something, she’s still not what you would call “ordinary.” For one thing, there’s her past which she likes to pretend never happened, and then there’s the fact that she sees ghosts. Luckily for her, that all comes in handy when she stumbles across Dex Foray, an eccentric producer for an upcoming webcast on ghost hunters. Even though the show’s budget is non-existent and Dex himself is a maddening enigma, Perry is instantly drawn into a world that both threatens her life and seduces her with a sense of importance. Her uncle’s haunted lighthouse provides the perfect catalyst and backdrop for a horrific mystery that unravels the threads of Perry’s fragile sanity and causes her to fall for a man, who, like the most dangerous of ghosts, may not be all that he seems.
Dear Bridget, I Want You
Penelope Ward - 2017
You're the proper single mum with a good head on your shoulders. I'm just the carefree British doctor passing through town and temporarily living in your converted garage until I head back to England.But here's the thing... for some bloody reason, I can't stop thinking about you in very inappropriate ways.I want you.The only reason I'm even admitting all of this to you right now is because I don't believe it's one-sided. I notice your eyes when you look at me, too. And as crass as I appear when we're joking around about sex, my attraction to you is not a joke.So, what's the purpose of this note? I guess it's a reminder that we're adults, that sex is healthy and natural, and that you can find me just through the door past the kitchen. More specifically, it's to let you know that I'm leaving said door cracked open from now on in case you'd like to visit me in the middle of the night sometime.No questions asked.Think about it.Or don't.Whatever you choose.It's doubtful I'll even end up sliding this letter under your door anyway.--Simon
The Savages
Matt Whyman - 2013
. .Sasha Savage is in love with Jack - a handsome, charming ... vegetarian. Which wouldn't be a problem if it weren't for the fact that Sasha's family are very much 'carnivorous'. Behind the family facade all is not as it seems. Sasha's father rules his clan with an iron fist and her mother's culinary skills are getting more adventurous by the day. When a too-curious private detective starts to dig for truths, the tight-knit family starts to unravel - as does their sinister taste in human beings . . .
The Viscount's Tempting Minx
Erica Ridley - 2014
Why, the latest on-dit is that rakish Viscount Sheffield is canceling the fête of the year because he hasn't time for silly soirees. He doesn't need time—he needs her! When a flash of lightning destroys the venue for his family's annual Christmas ball, Lord Benedict Sheffield intends to enjoy a relaxing holiday for once. But after twelve days of beguiling Lady Amelia's guerrilla tactics, he's up to his cravat with tinsel . . . and tumbling head over heels in love.
Witch Weigh
Caroline Mickelson - 2012
Magical spells aside, she’s snarky and selfish, and the other witches in her silent spell coven are fed up with her. Their plan to reform Tessa involves taking away her magic, saddling her with one hundred extra pounds and sending her to a weight loss spa. For good measure they call in Liam Kennedy, a charming and sexy fairy godfather, to teach her some manners. Desperate to regain her magic and determined to shed the weight, Tessa soon realizes that protecting her heart from Liam will prove to be her greatest challenge.
Hitman Anders and the Meaning of It All
Jonas Jonasson - 2015
Then his life takes an unexpected turn when he meets a female Protestant vicar (who also happens to be an atheist), and a homeless receptionist at a former brothel which is now a one-star hotel. The three join forces and concoct an unusual business plan based on Hitman Anders’ skills and his fearsome reputation. The vicar and receptionist will organize jobs for a group of gangsters, and will attract customers using the tabloids’ love of lurid headlines.The perfect plan—if it weren’t for Hitman Anders’ curiosity about the meaning of it all. In conversations with the vicar, he turns to Jesus and, against all odds, Jesus answers him! The vicar can’t believe what’s happening. When Hitman Anders turns to religion, the lucrative business is in danger, and the vicar and the receptionist have to find a new plan, quick.Fast-paced and sparky, the novel follows these bizarre but loveable characters on their quest to create a New Church, with all of Sweden’s gangsters hunting them. Along the way, it explores the consequences of fanaticism, the sensationalist press, the entrepreneurial spirit and straightforward human stupidity—and underlying all of it, the tenuous hope that it’s never too late to start again.
Keela
L.A. Casey - 2015
She has no time to dwell on them as she is moving out of her dog box sized apartment and into her first house with her fiancé. Moving house is a dreaded task, and Keela would love nothing more than for things to go quietly and smoothly, but when you’re engaged to a Slater brother, nothing goes quietly or smoothly. Nothing.Alec Slater loves his woman. He also loves playing games and surprising her. Picking moving day to do both, turns out to be a failure of epic proportions. Alec wants to make it up to Keela for his mistakes, but as the day goes on, and things go from bad to worse, he doesn’t know if living with him is something she wants anymore.What started out as a simple day of packing and moving house turns into the day from Hell. Unwanted house guests. Business propositions. Alcohol. Pregnancy tests. Panic attacks. Fighting. Arguing. Sex, and everything else that is crazy and represents the name Slater. Keela has a choice to make, and not one she will make lightly.Keela adores Alec, and what Keela adores, Keela cherishes.
Keeping Her
Cora Carmack - 2013
. . ahem . . . complicated start. By comparison, meeting the parents should be an absolute breeze, right?But from the moment the pair lands in London, new snags just keep cropping up: a disapproving mother-in-law-to-be, more than one (mostly) minor mishap, and the realization that perhaps they aren't quite as ready for their future as they thought.As it turns out, the only thing harder than finding love is keeping it.
Clown Tear Junkies
Douglas Hackle - 2013
A deadbeat dad gains employment as a lady-in-waiting in a fairytale bromance where every character looks exactly like someone else from John Carpenter’s The Thing. The unknowing victim of a cruel prank, a simpleton spends his entire life waiting on a park bench for the hottest girl in school. Using only his twenty-sided die and good old-fashioned D&D magic, a man must continually resurrect the neighborhood kid regularly murdered on his own front lawn. An aging slaughterhouse worker and the iconic figure from Edvard Munch’s The Scream hit the clubs every weekend in a vain attempt to get laid.These and many more absurdities await in Clown Tear Junkies, the debut collection from Douglas Hackle.
The Last Single Girl
Bria Quinlan - 2012
Last minute. Who doesn't already have plans on the busiest date night of the year.But, so far the best part of the search for a great date has been the cute café I found and the geeky-hot owner who keeps rescuing me from these crazy eLove.com dates. This should be easy-peasy. The internet is the home of all your hopes and needs, right?Spoiler Alert: it isn't.Between the bromance date and the crazed single dad who needs to hire a nanny and housekeeper, not get a date, I'm running out of options. If only a certain cutey didn't have a phone call with "sweetheart" every day.The weirder things get, the more I think just going solo is very I Am Woman, blah blah blah. Forget about the fact that my heart keeps bringing me back to a certain café even when I don't need to be there...I mean, my heart doesn't always get what it wants, does it?
A Very Charley Christmas
Darynda Jones - 2016
Exclusive Charley Davidson Short Story featured in the December 2016 newsletter.
It Felt Like a Kiss
Sarra Manning - 2013
Great job, really good hair, loyal friends, loving family. It’s only her succession of lame duck boyfriends that ruin the picture.Oh, and the world-famous rock-star father she’s never met, who won’t even acknowledge her existence.Then Ellie’s perfect life is smashed to pieces when her secret is sold to the highest bidder and her name, face (and pictures of her bottom) are splashed across the tabloids. Suddenly everyone thinks she’s a gold-digging, sex-crazy, famewhore.Enter David Gold. Charming and handsome David Gold. On paper he’s even more perfect than Ellie, if only he wasn’t her father’s ruthlessly ambitious lawyer whose job is to manage the crisis – and her. He certainly doesn’t think that Ellie’s the innocent party and she doesn’t trust him at all. So why is it that every time they’re alone together, damage limitation is the last thing on their minds?