i really mean it! IF YOU ARE EASILY OFFENDED AND BELONG TO ONE OF THE FOLLOWING GROUPS, PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS BOOK: SCOTTISH, WELSH, NORTHERN IRISH, IRISH CATHOLICS, COCKNEYS, CHAVS, UPPER CLASS ENGLISH TWATS, RELIGIOUS CHRISTIANS, MUSLIMS, JEWS, HOMOSEXUALS, RESIDENTS OF WATFORD, THE ACTOR ROBERT CARLYLE, THE WORKING CLASSES, THE UNEMPLOYED PUB GOING DOLE SCROUNGERS, THE AUTHOR'S FRIEND DANIEL SKELTON, REPUBLICAN AMERICANS, SOUTHERN STATES AMERICANS, CHRISTIAN MIDWEST AMERICANS WITH TRADITIONAL VALUES, ANY AMERICAN, TRANSVESTITES, SUPPORTERS OF THE ENGLAND FOOTBALL SQUAD, IRANIANS, EX PRESIDENT OF IRAN MAHMOUD AHMADINEJAD, SYRIANS, BASHAR AL ASSAD, WAYNE ROONEY, BELGIUMS, AGATHA CHRISTIE, THE FRENCH, YAHOO MESSAGE BOARD COMMENTATORS, SOUTH AMERICAN CRIME CARTELS, PRIESTS AND REVERENDS, THE WRITER OF THIS BOOK, PALESTINIANS, ARABS IN GENERAL, OLD YIDDISH MEN, THE FICTIONAL OLLAWONGA TRIBE OF DARKEST AFRICA, THE WRITER AND READERS OF FIFTY SHADES OF GREY, THE CHINESE AND TONY BLAIR. IF YOU BELONG TO ONE OF THE FOLLOWING GROUPS WHO HAVE HAD A MORE THAN CAMEO MENTION/APPEARANCE IN THE NOVEL, PLEASE READ THE BOOK WITHOUT FEAR OF OFFENSIVE STEREOTYPING: ITALIANS. If you have got this far, then allow me to enlighten you about a secret so great that the general public has no idea about but every government in the world knows and they are involved in a consistent cover up to keep the horrors from you.. What are the Ethereals? Some say they are the personifications of iconic and stereotypical energies given life by our collective beliefs and imagination. Others say they started as humans and evolved for much the same reasons given above. Both viewpoints have a basis in truth. A decade ago one of the most fearsome of these beings 'The Englishman,' was banished from our plane of existence by a weeping Tony Blair who cut the throat of a small child in a necromantic energy ritual to do so. With such a price paid, the question has to be asked ... just how serious a threat has arisen from the Ethereal world that the British government's only option is to bring back the Englishman to save us!!!! Set in 2012 in the lead up to the US election ... welcome to the twisted world of Mad Dog and The Englishman. WARNING: The following piece of hack work contains levels of swearing, depraved activity and violent situations sufficient enough to have Jihadi John puking up his guts.

    To make matters worse, Joey finds himself caught in the middle of a career threatening scandal. Can Charlotte help Joey get out of this disaster before it's too late?Find out in part four of Craving Her Curves!

    This is historical fiction set in World War 2 and shows Barbara Sinclair coming-of-age and learning to deal with the problems life throws at her. Barbara's War As war rages over Europe, Barbara Sinclair is desperate to escape from her unhappy home which is a target of the German Luftwaffe. Caught up by the emotion of the moment she agrees to marry John, her childhood friend, who is leaving to join the RAF, but a meeting with Simon Farley, the son of a local industrialist, and an encounter with Alex Everton, a Spitfire pilot, complicate matters. With rationing, bombing and the constant threat of death all around her, Barbara must unravel the complexities of her home life and the difficulties of her emotional relationships in this gripping coming-of-age wartime drama. The Middle Years Barbara's War - The Middle Years - is the second book in a three book series. The third and final book in this series will be released in September 2014. The phony war is over and Hitler is beginning his rampage through Europe. Barbara Sinclair is determined to 'do her bit' for the war effort but circumstances send her down another, unexpected path. She leaves her home to start a new life as a married woman but when the bombing raids begin, tragedy follows. The Resolution If Barbara's secret is discovered it will destroy her family, but no one can keep a secret forever. Her husband Alex, a Spitfire pilot, would reject her and her marriage will be over. A tragedy almosts rips the family apart and then Alex is posted abroad. Barbara has to learn to live without him. A series of domestic catastrophes, bad news and the unexpected appearance of her childhood friend, John Thorogood, cause her further heartache. Can she find a happy resolution to her problems?

    A girl on the run from love. An exotic location where the weather isn't the only thing that's hot. Kate Saunders is sure of only one thing as her flight to a new life lands in a new country: short of joining a convent, her new job teaching at an all-female school is just what she needs. Until she meets Kai. Cultured and worldly, Kai lives a life of wealth and privilege where he always gets what he wants. And what he wants next is Kate. - - - - Box set contains three full length novels that are smart, sexy, and laugh-out-loud.

    He and Brody are settling into their new life when he stumbles onto a plot of marijuana plants on public land. Knowing a thing or two about growing weed, Breeze befriends the mysterious mountain man tending to the crop. When his new friend is killed, he tries to help law enforcement solve the crime. When the authorities prove reluctant, he is forced to take matters into his own hands. In the process, he transforms from boat bum to a true man of the mountains. Blue Ridge Breeze - There is a fugitive loose on McGuire Mountain. Local law enforcement asks Breeze to help track the man down. The mission goes horribly wrong. In the process of trying to make it right, Breeze uncovers corruption by the Chief of Police. Though he’s committed no crime, he once again finds himself on the wrong side of the law. He thinks the problem is resolved, but someone is stalking his cabin. Breeze and Brody become prisoners in their own home. The situation forces Breeze to utilize his mountain skills like never before. Beech Mountain Breeze - A freak accident causes Buckeye Lake to be drained. A girl’s body is found in the mud. A mysterious mountain hermit is a suspect, but no one has ever seen him. Breeze is called upon to track a man that he’s not even sure exists. He teams up with an attractive female police officer, who wants more than just a professional relationship. Pressure mounts as the case progresses, in more ways than one. High Country Breeze - In the mountains of western North Carolina, things aren’t always as they seem. When a college student is found dead, the incident is quickly ruled a suicide. The boy’s parents hire Breeze and Brody to investigate his death. At first, they are stonewalled by the entire community, but Breeze devises a devious and clever plan to get to the truth. They think they’ve broken the case wide open, but soon learn their mission is not complete. New River Breeze - There is a fugitive near the New River that baffles Breeze with his speed and endurance. Creekside Investigations becomes occupied with the marital surveillance business; tracking cheating spouses in the High Country. Breeze can’t accept his failure to capture the Running Man, so he puts his fledgling business aside to return to the wilderness in pursuit of his prey. It all leads to an explosive ending that will rip your guts out and leave you wandering what happens next.

    She’s well on her way to becoming a world-renowned actress and her latest movie will surely be a big hit at the box office. She’s basically winning at life… Until now. The emergence of a mysterious stalker, hell-bent on taking her no matter what, has put a wrench into Veronica’s perfect life. After a foiled kidnapping attempt at her latest project, her agents are left with no choice but to hire a Delta Protector. Jason Keyes had been content serving as part of the Delta Force until a mission goes awry and the blood of his beloved comrade stained his hands. Desperate for escape, he leaves the military and goes back home, only for his old friend Chase to offer him a job he can’t refuse: to protect Veronica Langley. As their differences collide and each of them battle to get their way, will their passionate arguments lead to something more? Or will their bullheaded personalities clash and spell death for the both of them? TORN APART Georgiana Pratt, aka “George”, is sick and tired of living under her parents’ rules. She yearns for the day when she can finally spread her wings and make decisions for herself. Studying at a university far, far away from her parents’ prying eyes seems like the perfect solution to her problem. Despite their protest, she leaves the comforts of home and takes the first step into college. She swears this time the only person to run her life is the person possessing it: her. Ex-Marine Spencer Downing has been waiting for a challenge to come his way, and his new assignment might just be the ticket. It wasn’t just a simple protector job; he needed to disguise himself as a student, and keep an eye on a girl who’s never been out of her parents’ roof. The catch is she must never find out. As the fates conspire to get Spencer and George closer, will they give in and provide a chance for their love to blossom? Or will the secret between them tear them apart? BROKEN Rebecca Hayes has joined Chase’s pack of delta protectors, and her first mission involves protecting two subjects – a budding musician and his daughter. Despite her extensive military training and expertise, even she has to admit guarding two people would be difficult…which is why she’s getting a partner. Rebecca is in for the shock of her life when she meets Michael Gardner, the newest addition, and her partner, as well as the man who destroyed her heart many years ago. Michael is surprised to meet his former flame, and sees this moment as an opportunity to rekindle the bond broken between them. But how can he do that when the girl he left behind is now a woman determined to have nothing to do with him? Tanner Lee’s reputation in the music industry has reached a point where going out unprotected is no longer an option, more so for his daughter, Elizabeth, who he already hardly ever has time for. While he plays his bad boy image down to a T, a bigger part of him just wants to be the doting father Elizabeth needs and deserves. He hires Rebecca and Michael to protect them, and the spark that ignites between him and Rebecca is too strong to deny… With feelings she thought she’d buried to the ground starting to resurface, can Rebecca and Michael work things out before their issues threaten to jeopardize the mission? Or will Tanner and Rebecca cross the forbidden line and find their own happy ending…with each other ***Delta Protectors is three standalone security romance books each with a guaranteed happily ever after.

    What's to Love: The Fat Cat makes the perfect lasagna-stuffed stocking stuffer in this oversized holiday one-shot from some of our favorite Garfield pals! What It Is: It's time for the not-so-classic story of "The Lasagna Monster That Stole Christmas," where the Lasagna Monster steals ALL the lasagna in the world on Christmas Day!

    Theo, her lovable chocolate Lab, has been her faithful companion since she was born. But now, as a result of the Great Recession, Courtney's world is unraveling. Her father has been unemployed for a long time and the bank is about to foreclose on their home. Soon her family will be moving into an apartment that doesn't allow dogs. Heartbreakingly for Courtney that means Theo won't be able to come along. After unsuccessfully trying to find someone to take the old dog, Courtney's parents decide to take Theo to a no-kill animal shelter as a last resort. But when the day of reckoning arrives something completely unexpected occurs. It ends up leading Courtney on an extraordinary journey, which teaches her important life lessons and makes her understand that a dog's love is forever.

    a canine-human Esther Perel' The ObserverWouldn't you love to know what your dog was thinking?The truth is that your dog is communicating with you all the time but, unless you know the signs, you aren't picking up on what your dog wants you to know. Louise Glazebrook is a dog behaviourist, trainer and television presenter who specialises in teaching people how to understand and connect with their dogs. In The Book Your Dog Wishes You Would Read, Louise tackles everything from bringing the right dog home, understanding body language and breed behaviour, responding to common behavioural issues, to the toys and games that you and your dog will both love.Most dog trainers focus on the dog, but Louise focuses on you, the owner, giving you the skills and confidence to interpret your dog's needs and behaviour and build a better, happier relationship for life.

    No puzzle is ever too tricky for the two of them to solve . . .Ottoline lives in a stylish apartment in Big City with a small hairy creature called Mr Munroe. Together they look after the Brown family's eclectic collections - and dabble in a spot of detective work. So they are the first to the scene of the crime when a string of high society dog-nappings and jewel thefts hits Big City. Ottoline (who luckily has a diploma from the Who-R-U Academy of Disguise) and Mr Munroe go undercover - and expose an ingenious scam masterminded by furry feline crook, the Yellow Cat.

    The Black Death has arrived. Fatima loses her parents to the plague. She's wandering in the forest alone and doesn't know where to go for comfort. In her desperation and in the cold at night, she dreams of a pink unicorn that can save her from fear and starvation. When she wakes she sees the carriage of the princess passing by. It has a pink unicorn design on it. Fatima pursues the carriage, meets the princess, and her life is forever changed as she learns the true meaning of the pink unicorn. Scroll up and grab a copy today More Collection from Ken Clue Finder Club Collection : http://amzn.to/1f18sdw 2 Ending Options Fairy Tale : http://amzn.to/1Ehbi4J Unicorn Fairy Tale Collection : http://amzn.to/1Tg9Kij Dragon Fairy Tale Collection : http://amzn.to/1IAV8oR

    Anyone who comes in contact with it is overcome with greed. For centuries, this treasure has been hoarded deep below the oceans surface. To steal it, one has to get past the creature! One groups quest for the cursed riches is retold in this striking graphic novel adaptation.

    From the Trade Paperback edition.

    This is because a child is absolutely captivated by animals. The encyclopedia of animals is especially appealing to all kids. Kids are fascinated by any book on animals. Animal books are loved by kids and the animals do indeed inspire them. Kids will be completely entertained and will stay interested with a book that holds their interest. Kids love learning about the animals.

    The second book from Brandon Boyd which follows up the successful White Fluffy Clouds, From the Murks of the Sultry Abyss comes in a special outer box, a limited edition #d sheet of stickers of artwork from Boyd, and the book itself comes sealed.