All they have to do is fix the place up and sell it for a tidy profit!Except—as anyone who has renovated an old house knows—things are never that easy.The walls are rapidly crumbling around them, the architect is a certified lunatic, the budget is spiraling…and then there’s the disturbingly intelligent cow to worry about.On top of all this, the renovation is being featured on a daytime reality TV show, and as soon as Great Locations presenter Gerard O’Keefe catches sight of Hayley’s first-floor balcony, he’s determined to woo her out of her ban on romance, whether she wants him to or not.Will Dan and Hayley survive and sell up? Or will the whole thing collapse on them like a ton of bricks?From bestselling author Nick Spalding comes a hilarious tale of life, love and dodgy plumbing.

    Drawing on observations by eminent biologists, from Thomas Huxley to Charles Darwin to Richard Dawkins, Ricky Steve and Karl offer their usual benighted summation.Areas of discussion include: The heuristic potential of flora and fauna; Karl is impressed by a new motoring accessory; Seashores to semiconductors; Gene genius; Monkey thumping; Karl's instinct for extinction; Self-improvement a la Frankenstein; Dodos - a dead delicacy?; Aurally challenged alligators, hedonistic rodents and horse-biting ranidae; Genital aesthetics - Karl talks bollocks.

    If he can't, he'll never be able to shut out the memory of his wife getting torn to shreds by the infected. Fifteen years ago the world fell apart. By day the zombie infected swarm the streets, and at night the stalkers come out of their nests to kill. Mankind is on the brink of extinction. When a teenager called Justin tricks Kyle into taking him along, Kyle has to learn to trust others, and himself, again. He doesn't want to face his past, but there are some things that you can't turn away from. A gripping story of survival that zombie apocalypse fans will love.

    Or pulled the blankets over your head and imagined creatures inching across your bedroom. Well, they’re real. The Organization, as it’s called, is tasked with keeping the nightmares of myth and legend from invading the public eye. The group must be kept a secret along with the fact that the creatures exist. As civilization expands its boundaries, that undertaking becomes more difficult. A very few are selected to stand on the lines between humankind and the horrors lurking in the dark recesses of the world. Follow Jack Walker and Red Team as they’re pulled into the shadows to combat creatures that once kept them awake at night.

    Taking the form of a biologist's illustrated journal found in the aftermath of the attack, this pulse-pounding, suspenseful tale of zombie apocalypse follows the narrator as he flees from city to countryside and heads north to Canada, wherehe hopesthe undead will be slowed by the colder climate. Encountering scattered humans and scores of the infected along the way, he fills his notebook with graphic drawings of the zombies and careful observations of their behavior, along with terrifying tales of survival. This frightening new contribution to the massively popular zombie resurgence will keep fans on the edge of their seats right up to the very end.The official Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Zombie...

     But with the people of the Rune Lands encroaching on the southern cities of Unigaea, and something brewing in the sky that could prove fatal to the entire online world, Oric must make the choice between personal vengeance and becoming the hero he is destined to be. Joining him on his epic journey are a giant Tagvornin wolf, a mute Solar Mage, and a cunning illusionist named Sam Raid. Do not miss this the start of this powerful LitRPG fantasy trilogy by the author of Fantasy Online and The Feedback Loop series!

    Over 1,000 pages of chilling, post-apocalyptic thriller action and suspense.SOMETHING INSIDIOUS HAS ARRIVED--RIGHT IN THE HEARTLAND OF OUR NATION, TURNING NEIGHBOR AGAINST NEIGHBOR!.Dr. Lauren Hale, a new hospital resident, is nearly killed by a raving mad emergency room patient, in a senseless, unprovoked attack. Officer David Olson , veteran cop and former Marine, returns from a father-son camping trip to discover that his ex-wife has vanished under bizarre circumstances, and his police department is on the verge of collapse. Jack and Emma Harper , a young, upwardly mobile couple, find their hip city neighborhood rapidly descending into madness. Dr. Eugene Chang , a research scientist for a major pharmaceutical company makes a shocking discovery that might explain the spreading wave of illness and violence gripping the city. Eric Larsen , leader of a top-secret, rapid-response unit, circles high above the Midwest, in an unmarked military transport. Mission still unknown, his team waits to parachute into the night.WITHIN TWENTY-FOUR HOURS, complete strangers from different walks of life will be forced to join together to survive the LIVING NIGHTMARE that has been unleashed on their city--AND THEIR COUNTRY.This is their story.WELCOME TO THE ZULU VIRUS CHRONICLES!

    He isn't one of them. Meet Bill Ryder: programmer, gamer geek, and hopeless dweeb when it comes to women. All he ever asked for out of life was to collect his paycheck, hang out with his buds, and eventually (someday) ask out the girl of his dreams.However, then Bill met Sally. She was mysterious, aggressive, and best of all...smoking hot. Bill never stood a chance. Before he knew what was happening Sally had lead him to his death, and that was only the beginning of his troubles. Now Bill awakes to find himself an undead predator of the night. The only problem is he’s still at the bottom of the food chain. He’s in way over his head, surrounded by creatures more dangerous, better looking, and a whole lot cooler than he is. Worst of all is the dreaded Night Razor, a master vampire who just can’t stand him. He gives Bill a 90-day deadline to either prove himself or meet a more permanent kind of death, and the deck is definitely stacked against him.But Bill isn’t exactly average. A vampire like him hasn’t been seen in over five centuries. He's got a few tricks up his sleeve, unlikely allies to help him out, and an attitude problem that makes him just too damn obnoxious to quit. He may just pull it off... if he doesn't get his teeth kicked in first.Bill the Vampire is an 80,000 word horror comedy adventure by Rick Gualtieri.

    Doctor Ravinder Shah speaking. No case too weird, no problem too bizarre. Strangeness a speciality. How can I help you?” London Social Worker Rav Shah moonlights as a paranormal detective, aided by one of his clients and a Border Collie he rents by the hour. It was supposed to be a bit of fun: a search for truths out there; a quest for a life more interesting than the one that fate, destiny, and personal apathy had granted him. But then a case involving a Yorkshire farmer and a herd of flying pigs leads him into a world darker and more dangerous than he’d ever dreamed. The truth is indeed out there. And it’s got Rav square in its sights.

    With a supporting cast of fellow comedians, this is a warmly written and wonderfully honest adventure-through-sport that will both entertain and inspire.Along the way, we are introduced to the characters helping Paul with his quest. Celebrity names such as Bryony Gordon, Russell Howard, Roisin Conaty and Vassos Alexander pop up with wit and wisdom, alongside an alpine adventure to the Mayr Clinic with Michael McIntyre that pushes Paul to the limit. And not forgetting the 'words of wisdom' and derision from Paul's anti-running friend, Richard.

    Unfortunately, that was before two dudes wielding high-tech gadgets made off with both his kegs and his brother. Now Clyde has to hunt down his sibling with only his most trusted lackey along to help. Will he manage to recover both his beer and Dougie? Will they survive the night as they unveil the mysterious secret of the kidnappers? Will the Earth be destroyed thanks to their bumbling incompetence? Probably that last one, but you’ll have to read it to find out.

    He has been a busy man. Yet, for the last two years, he has also managed to squeeze in a weekly column for The Times. Without fail, he sat down every week and wracked his brain to think of something to write 900 words about. Dispatches From the Sofa is the brilliant result. Alighting on such random topics as the potential demise of Margaret Thatcher, the love-hate relationship with your football club, Mike Read's musical of Oscar Wilde, fat pop stars, Serbian breakfast banter, the pleasures of air-guitar, the banking crisis and the evil phenomenon of Jedward, this is a thought-provoking, wide-reaching, hilarious and self-deprecating collection - which also includes the first two chapters from his unpublished novel - from one of our funniest, quickest and most beloved comedians.

    Hal SpacejockAn incompetent space pilot, a massive debt and a twenty-four hour deadline...Freighter pilot Hal Spacejock has a life to die for: His very own cargo ship, a witty and intelligent flight computer ... and a debt so big it makes the GFC look like a rounding error.Hal's an upright sort of guy, and he won't take jobs from gun runners, drug smugglers or politicians. On the other hand, the finance company's brutal enforcer is on his doorstep, and Hal has barely twenty-four hours to pay him off. Miss the deadline and he - and his ship - will go under. Way, way, under.Faced with an impossible choice, Hal chooses an impossible job ... and gains an impossible new co-pilot into the bargain.Hal Spacejock is the first novel in the Hal Spacejock series (80,000 words, approx 350 pages)2. Hal Spacejock: Second CourseRex Curtis is trying to save his freight company from bankruptcy, and the last thing he needs is a cheeky freelancer stealing his best customers.Hal Spacejock, cheeky freelancer, is fighting for survival in the cut-throat interstellar cargo business. The last thing he needs is a powerful enemy.Two headstrong men on a collision course, in a Galaxy barely room enough for one.Hal Spacejock: Second Course is book two in the Hal Spacejock series. (80,000 words, approx 350 pages)3. Hal Spacejock Just DessertsPlanet Cathua has a proud history where robots are concerned. Their legendary factories produced the best, the fastest, the most efficient robots in the Galaxy ... but no longer.Now they must go cap in hand to neighbouring planets, haggling and bartering for the very  robots they used to be so famous for.One Cathuan patriot is determined to reverse this embarrassing situation, and Hal Spacejock lands in the middle of his sinister plot ...Hal Spacejock: Just Desserts is book three in the Hal Spacejock series. (80,000 words, approx  350 pages)Plus ... Hal Spacejock: VisitHal returns to his ship after a shopping expedition, and finds Clunk in a right old state. Break out the crayons and colouring sheets ... they're booked in for a school visit!Hal and Clunk, stars of the Hal Spacejock comedy series, feature in this 3500-word short story. Visit slots into the series any time after Hal Spacejock (book one), but can be read and enjoyed as a stand-alone.

    Technology has been reduced to legend, monsters roam the forests, and fear reigns supreme. But that is just the beginning... The wind-borne spores are spreading, disfiguring men and twisting their minds, turning them into creatures that threaten to destroy the townships. Among the townsfolk, political and the religious, dissension is spreading. Through it all, a mother must protect her son...

    Some are more credible than others, and, frankly, some are completely insane, but all are observed with appropriate seriousness as Taylor attempts to better understand some of the spooky things that have happened to him in his life, especially that night at the Cold House.But that’s not all, folks. Taylor once again gives you a behind-the-scenes tour of his crazy life and the many beyond-the-grave events he’s encountered. (You’ll be shocked how often Slipknot has been invaded by the supernatural.) Taylor also touches on his religious background and how it led him to believe in much more than the Man in the Sky.