Hiding from Love: How to Change the Withdrawal Patterns That Isolate and Imprison You


John Townsend - 1991
    Often, you've learned these hiding patterns during childhood to protect yourself in a threatening environment. The problem is that when you hide your injuries and frailties, you isolate yourself from the very things you need in order to heal and mature--connection, intimacy, and love. What served as protection for a child becomes a prison to an adult.In Hiding from Love, Dr. John Townsend helps you explore the hiding patterns you've developed and guides you toward the healing grace and truth of safe, connected relationships with God and others. You'll discover:The difference between "good" and "bad" hidingWhy you hide the broken parts of your soul from the God who can heal themHow to be free to make mistakes without fear of exposing your failures and imperfectionsHow to obtain the joy and wholeness God intends you to have through healthy bonding with othersWorkbook also available.

The Courage to be Happy: True Contentment Is In Your Power


Ichiro Kishimi - 2016
    In The Courage To Be Happy, Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga again distil their wisdom into simple yet profound advice to show us how we, too, can use twentieth-century psychological theory to find true happiness.

Useful Delusions: The Power and Paradox of the Self-Deceiving Brain


Shankar Vedantam - 2021
    But if it is so bad for us, why is it ubiquitous? In Useful Delusions, Shankar Vedantam and Bill Mesler argue that, paradoxically, self-deception can also play a vital role in our success and well-being.The lies we tell ourselves sustain our daily interactions with friends, lovers, and coworkers. They can explain why some people live longer than others, why some couples remain in love and others don’t, why some nations hold together while others splinter.Filled with powerful personal stories and drawing on new insights in psychology, neuroscience, and philosophy, Useful Delusions offers a fascinating tour of what it really means to be human.

Emotional Wellness: Transforming Fear, Anger, and Jealousy into Creative Energy


Osho - 2007
    We fear that by expressing our true feelings, we will hurt and alienate those close to us. But by repressing our emotions—even in the benevolent guise of “self-control”—we only risk hurting ourselves.Osho, one of the most provocative and inspiring spiritual teachers of our time, provides here a practical and comprehensive approach to dealing with this conflict effectively. Incorporating new, never-before-published material, Emotional Wellness leads us to understand the roots of our emotions, to react to situations in a way that can teach us more about ourselves and others, and to respond to life’s inevitable ups and downs with far greater confidence and equilibrium. Discover:• The impact that fear, anger, and jealousy have on our lives• How emotions like guilt, insecurity, and fear are used to manipulate us• How to break out of unhealthy responses to strong emotions• How to transform destructive emotions into creative energy• The role of society and culture on our individual emotional stylesOsho’s unique insight into the human mind and heart goes far beyond conventional psychology. He teaches us to experience our emotions fully and to deal with them creatively in order to achieve a richer, fuller life.

Unwinding Anxiety: New Science Shows How to Break the Cycles of Worry and Fear to Heal Your Mind


Judson Brewer - 2021
    Whether facing issues as public as a pandemic or as personal as having kids at home and fighting the urge to reach for the wine bottle every night, we are feeling overwhelmed and out of control. But in this timely book, Judson Brewer explains how to uproot anxiety at its source using brain-based techniques and small hacks accessible to anyone.We think of anxiety as everything from mild unease to full-blown panic. But it's also what drives the addictive behaviors and bad habits we use to cope (e.g. stress eating, procrastination, doom scrolling and social media). Plus, anxiety lives in a part of the brain that resists rational thought. So we get stuck in anxiety habit loops that we can't think our way out of or use willpower to overcome. Dr. Brewer teaches us map our brains to discover our triggers, defuse them with the simple but powerful practice of curiosity, and to train our brains using mindfulness and other practices that his lab has proven can work.Distilling more than 20 years of research and hands-on work with thousands of patients, including Olympic athletes and coaches, and leaders in government and business, Dr. Brewer has created a clear, solution-oriented program that anyone can use to feel better - no matter how anxious they feel.

What to Say When You Talk to Yourself


Shad Helmstetter - 1986
    Any amount of inspirational reading will only provide us with techniques that could work if put into practice. This book explains the principles of self-talk - a unique way of reversing negativity, optimizing outlook, focusing plans and achieving success. The key is in affirming, telling yourself the right things which then reflect in a more positive lifestyle.

The Man with the Electrified Brain


Simon Winchester - 2013
    It was inside, inside my head, where all had become so wretchedly different. I had the night before been incontrovertibly a man of stable mood, of calm, of good cheer and unforced bonhomie. Now I had become changed, with dreadful suddenness, into another being altogether.”Simon Winchester has never shied away from big, even enormous, topics—as evidenced by his bestselling biography of the Atlantic Ocean, his account of the Krakatoa volcanic eruption, and his wildly popular “The Professor and the Madman,” about the making of the Oxford English Dictionary. In his Byliner Original “The Man with the Electrified Brain,” he takes on arguably his most daunting subject yet: his own flirtation with madness, and one of nature’s greatest and most enduring mysteries, the human brain. As a geology student in his second year at Oxford, Winchester was known as a young man of even temper and keen intellect, until one June morning when he woke to find himself “changed with dreadful suddenness into another being altogether,” his normal life “slumped into chasm” and “folded in the dirt.” For a period of nine days, he lived in immobilizing fear. Everyday items—familiar paintings, a pile of books, his own robe hanging from a hook—became objects of horror; the world lost color, purpose, all sense and safety. When the episode finally passed, he returned to normal, presuming that what had happened to him was a fluke. It wasn’t. The episode repeated itself at unpredictable and dangerous intervals for four years—always lasting for nine days—and very nearly caused the author’s death while he was on an expedition in the Arctic. What was wrong with him? Where could he find help? Would he spend the rest of his life anticipating the return of these mental blackouts? With the urgency of a whodunit, Winchester describes the coming and going of these terrifying dissociative states and the chance encounter that led to the controversial treatment of electroconvulsive therapy, which may or may not have cured him once and for all. Written by a consummate storyteller, “The Man with the Electrified Brain” locates that finest of lines between sanity and insanity and is Winchester’s most riveting and deeply personal work yet.

The Mindfulness Survival Kit: Five Essential Practices


Thich Nhat Hanh - 2013
    Zen Master and peace activist Thich Nhat Hanh argues eloquently for their applicability in our daily lives and on a global scale. Nhat Hanh discusses the value and meaning of each precept, offering insights into the role that it could play in our changing society.Thich Nhat Hanh calls the trainings a "diet for a mindful society." With this book he offers a Buddhist contribution to the current thinking on how we can come together to define secular, moral guidelines that will allow us to explore and sustain a sane, compassionate, and healthy way of living. The Five Mindfulness Trainings offer a path to restoring meaning and value in our world, whether called virtues, ethics, moral conduct, or precepts they are guidelines for living without bringing harm to others.

The Body Remembers: The Psychophysiology of Trauma and Trauma Treatment


Babette Rothschild - 2000
    That memory is often expressed in the symptomatology of posttraumatic stress disorder-nightmares, flashbacks, startle responses, and dissociative behaviors. In essence, the body of the traumatized individual refuses to be ignored.While reducing the chasm between scientific theory and clinical practice and bridging the gap between talk therapy and body therapy, Rothschild presents principles and non-touch techniques for giving the body its due. With an eye to its relevance for clinicians, she consolidates current knowledge about the psychobiology of the stress response both in normally challenging situations and during extreme and prolonged trauma. This gives clinicians from all disciplines a foundation for speculating about the origins of their clients' symptoms and incorporating regard for the body into their practice. The somatic techniques are chosen with an eye to making trauma therapy safer while increasing mind-body integration.Packed with engaging case studies, The Body Remembers integrates body and mind in the treatment of posttraumatic stress disorder. It will appeal to clinicians, researchers, students, and general readers.

Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy


Jessica Fern - 2020
    Using her nested model of attachment and trauma, she expands our understanding of how emotional experiences can influence our relationships. Then, she sets out six specific strategies to help you move toward secure attachments in your multiple relationships. Polysecure is both a theoretical treatise and a practical guide.

Ten Days to Self-Esteem


David D. Burns - 1993
    All you need is your own common sense and the easy-to-follow methods revealed in this book by one of the country's foremost authorities on mood and personal relationship problems.In Ten Days to Self-esteem, Dr. David Burns presents innovative, clear, and compassionate methods that will help you identify the causes of your mood slumps and develop a more positive outlook on life. You will learn thatYou feel the way you think: Negative feelings like guilt, anger, and depression do not result from the bad things that happen to you, but from the way you think about these events. This simple but revolutionary idea can change your life!You can change the way you feel: You will discover why you get depressed and learn how to brighten your outlook when you're in a slump.You can enjoy greater happiness, productivity, and intimacy—without drugs or lengthy therapy.Can a self-help book do all this? Studies show that two thirds of depressed readers of Dr. Burns's classic bestseller, Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy, experienced dramatic felief in just four weeks without psychotherapy or antidepressant medications. Three-year follow-up studies revealed that readers did not relapse but continued to enjoy their positive outlook. Ten Days to Self-esteem offers a powerful new tool that provides hope and healing in ten easy steps. The methods are based on common sense and are not difficult to apply. Research shows that they really work!Feeling good feels wonderful. You owe it to yourself to feel good!

Manic-Depressive Illness: Bipolar Disorders and Recurrent Depression


Frederick K. Goodwin - 1990
    Hailed as the most outstanding book in the biomedical sciences when it was originally published in 1990, Manic-Depressive Illness was the first to survey this massive body of evidence comprehensively and to assess its meaning for both clinician and scientist. It also vividly portrayed the experience of manic-depressive illness from the perspective of patients, their doctors, and researchers. Encompassing an understanding about the illness as Kraeplin conceived of it- about its cyclical course and about the essential unity of its bipolar and recurrent unipolar forms- the book has become the definitive work on the topic, revered by both specialists and nonspecialists alike. Now, in this magnificent second edition, Drs. Frederick Goodwin and Kay Redfield Jamison bring their unique contribution to mental health science into the 21st century. In collaboration with a team of other leading scientists, a collaboration designed to preserve the unified voice of the two authors, they exhaustively review the biological and genetic literature that has dominated the field in recent years and incorporate cutting-edge research conducted since publication of the first edition. They also update their surveys of psychological and epidemiological evidence, as well as that pertaining to diagnostic issues, course, and outcome, and they offer practical guidelines for differential diagnosis and clinical management. The medical treatment of manic and depressive episodes is described, strategies for preventing future episodes are given in detail, and psychotherapeutic issues common in this illness are considered. Special emphasis is given to fostering compliance with medication regimens and treating patients who abuse drugs and alcohol or who pose a risk of suicide. This book, unique in the way that it retains the distinct perspective of its authors while assuring the maximum in-depth coverage of a vastly expanded base of scientific knowledge, will be a valuable and necessary addition to the libraries of psychiatrists and other physicians, psychologists, clinical social workers, neuroscientists, pharmacologists, and the patients and families who live with manic-depressive illness.

Your Survival Instinct Is Killing You: Retrain Your Brain to Conquer Fear, Make Better Decisions, and Thrive in the 21s t Century


Marc Schoen - 2013
    But here’s the paradox:  our tolerance for discomfort is at an all-time low. And as we wrestle with a sinking “discomfort threshold,” we increasingly find ourselves at the mercy of our primitive instincts and reactions that can perpetuate disease, dysfunction, and impair performance and decision making. Designed to keep us out of danger, our limbic brain’s Survival Instinct controls what we intuitively do to avert injury or death, such as running out of a burning building.   Rarely are we required to recruit this instinct today because seldom do we find ourselves in situations that are truly life-threatening. However, this part of our brain is programmed to naturally and automatically react to even the most benign forms of discomfort and stress as serious threats to our survival.   In this seminal book we learn how the Survival Instinct is the culprit that triggers a person to overeat, prevents the insomniac from sleeping, causes the executive to unravel under pressure, leads travelers to avoid planes or freeways, inflames pain, and due to past heartache, closes down an individual to love.  In all of these cases, their overly-sensitive Survival Instinct is being called into action at the slightest hint of discomfort.  In short, their Survival Instinct is stuck in the “ON” position…with grave consequences.  Your Survival Is Killing You can transform the way you live. Provocative, eye-opening, and surprisingly practical with its gallery of strategies and ideas, this book will show you how to build up your “instinctual muscles” for successfully managing discomfort while taming your overly reactive Survival Instinct. You will learn that the management of discomfort is the single most important skill for the twenty-first century.    This book is, at its heart, a modern guide to survival.

Disarming the Narcissist: Surviving and Thriving with the Self-Absorbed


Wendy T. Behary - 2008
    So how do you handle the narcissistic people in your life? You might interact with them in social or professional settings, and you might even love one—so ignoring them isn’t really a practical solution. They're frustrating, and maybe even intimidating, but ultimately, you need to find a way of communicating effectively with them.Disarming the Narcissist, Second Edition, will show you how to move past the narcissist's defenses using compassionate, empathetic communication. You'll learn how narcissists view the world, how to navigate their coping styles, and why, oftentimes, it's sad and lonely being a narcissist. By learning to anticipate and avoid certain hot-button issues, you'll be able to relate to narcissists without triggering aggression. By validating some common narcissistic concerns, you'll also find out how to be heard in conversation with a narcissist.This book will help you learn to meet your own needs while side-stepping unproductive power struggles and senseless arguments with someone who is at the center of his or her own universe. This new edition also includes new chapters on dealing with narcissistic women, aggressive and abusive narcissists, strategies for safety, and the link between narcissism and sex addiction.Finally, you'll learn how to set limits with your narcissist and when it's time to draw the line on unacceptable behavior.

A General Theory of Love


Thomas Lewis - 2000
    Three eminent psychiatrists tackle the difficult task of reconciling what artists and thinkers have known for thousands of years about the human heart with what has only recently been learned about the primitive functions of the human brain.A General Theory of Love demonstrates that our nervous systems are not self-contained: from earliest childhood, our brains actually link with those of the people close to us, in a silent rhythm that alters the very structure of our brains, establishes life-long emotional patterns, and makes us, in large part, who we are. Explaining how relationships function, how parents shape their child’s developing self, how psychotherapy really works, and how our society dangerously flouts essential emotional laws, this is a work of rare passion and eloquence that will forever change the way you think about human intimacy.