Throw in some vampires and a plot to overthrow the British monarchy, and what you have is the thrilling account that Charles Dickens was too scared to share with the world.From the brilliant mind of novelist and comic book veteran Peter David, Artful is the dark, funny, and action-packed story of one of the most fascinating characters in literary history.With vampires.

    By the divine promise of sacrifice, he awakened an Ash Angel with a new body, new powers, and a new war to fight. Cassandra, his temperamental trainer, tries to get him ready to battle Ghostpackers and Dreads, but it might be too little too late: for the first time in history, the Ash Angels are faltering against the fury of an evil more ancient than they are.While he fights to survive run-ins with a Sheid-hunted popstar and a gorgeous but dangerous Dread, Trace realizes his new life cannot erase the trauma of the old. Thrust onto the front lines of a violent war with ancient ambition, Trace finds that the deadliest demons are the ones lurking in his own mind.

    And when Maurice turns Reginald to save his life, it's just Reginald's own further bad luck that he wakes up to discover he's become the slowest, weakest, most out-of-shape vampire ever born, doomed to "heal" to his corpulent self for all of eternity.As Reginald struggles with the downsides of being a fat vampire -- too slow to catch people to feed on, mocked by those he tries to glamour, assaulted by his intended prey and left for undead -- he discovers in himself rare powers that few vampires have… and just in time too, because the Vampire Council might just want his head for being an inferior representative of their race. Fat Vampire is the story of an unlikely hero who, after having an imperfect eternity shoved into his grease-stained hands, must learn to turn the afterlife's lemons into tasty lemon danishes.

    Mina Murray and Jonathan Harker had a son. They named him Quincy. His guardian angel calls him Q. Dracula calls him nephew. Demons call him The Reaper. "There are things in this world that men and women aren’t meant to understand. We aren’t supposed to know these things exist, much less how to fight them. The things that go bump in the night, the monsters in the closet, the shadow out of the corner of your eye — that’s where I live." Year One collects the first four short novels in the Quincy Harker, Demon Hunter series Raising Hell - Winner of the 2016 Manly Wade Wellman Award - Quincy Harker takes on a demon-summoning entrepreneur that makes Gordon Gecko look like Santa Claus. Straight to Hell - The Four Horsemen are back in Charlotte, NC, and I don't mean Ric, Arn, Tully, and Barry. Harker has to save the world from the forces of Apocalypse. Hell on Heels - She's hot, she's mean, she's borderline psychotic and has a lot of issues with Harker and his people. She's Gabriella Van Helsing, and she's Hell on Heels. Hell Freezes Over - Somebody is walking through dreams and murdering families all over Harker's city. Now the ghost of a murdered little girl is walking through Harker's dreams. Is he going to stand for this? Yeah, when Hell Freezes Over.

    With weeks to live, a package arrives at the door of his hillside mansion—an artifact he paid millions for…a hominoid skull with elongated teeth, discovered in a farmer’s field in the Romanian countryside. With Shanna, his beautiful research assistant looking on, he sinks the skull’s razor sharp fangs into his neck, and immediately goes into convulsions. OPENS THE DOOR TO AN ANCIENT EVIL...A rural hospital. A slow night in the ER. Until Moorecook arrives strapped to a gurney, where he promptly codes and dies.WHERE DEATH IS JUST THE BEGINNING.Four well-known horror authors pool their penchants for scares and thrills, and tackle one of the greatest of all legends, with each writer creating a unique character and following them through a vampire outbreak in a secluded hospital.The goal was simple: write the most intense novel they possibly could.Which they did.A Word of Warning:Within these pages, you will find no black capes, no satin-lined coffins, no brooding heartthrobs who want to talk about your feelings. Forget sunlight and stakes. Throw out your garlic and your crosses. This is the Anti-TWILIGHT.NOTE: DRACULAS is a full length novel, 80,000 words long. But this ebook is also brimming with an additional 80,000 words of extras and bonuses:- a clickable table of contents- a round-robin interview with Strand, Wilson, Crouch, and Kilborn about writing DRACULAS- deleted scenes- two alternate endings- four excerpts from the authors’ other works- the short story “Serial” by Crouch and Kilborn- the short story “Cub Scout Gore Feast” by Kilborn and Strand- the short story “A Sound of Blunder” by Kilborn and Wilson- author biographies- comprehensive clickable bibliographies- an exclusive, behind-the-scenes look at the writing of DRACULAS, delivered through a collection of over seven hundred emails between the writers as they were brainstorming and writing the book

    Entering a world of mysterious powers and nightmarish consequences, Chris realizes the secret belief of every teenage boy- that his wang has the power to change the world. The Monkey's Penis is the third installment in the terrifying Shingles series, and once again readers with weak hearts or bladders are advised to read on at their own risk...

    Open at your own risk. Sarah and Tommy have the same kinds of problems as most any ten-year-old girl and six-year-old boy. Homework, bullies, Dad not going in to work since Mom ran off to fuck the postman. That sort of thing. But they're not going to take their problems lying down. After a quick bus ride into town to buy a gun, they think their problems are all but solved. That is, until a creepy weirdo follows them into an alley. But they aren't the only ones in that alley. What they discover will make you soil your pants in terror. It will make your skin crawl. It might even give you... Shingles.

    On her Raleigh Tuff Burner bike, she makes her way to a rickety covered bridge that, within moments, takes her wherever she needs to go, whether it’s across Massachusetts or across the country.Charles Talent Manx has a way with children. He likes to take them for rides in his 1938 Rolls-Royce Wraith with the NOS4A2 vanity plate. With his old car, he can slip right out of the everyday world, and onto the hidden roads that transport them to an astonishing – and terrifying – playground of amusements he calls “Christmasland.” Then, one day, Vic goes looking for trouble—and finds Manx. That was a lifetime ago. Now Vic, the only kid to ever escape Manx’s unmitigated evil, is all grown up and desperate to forget. But Charlie Manx never stopped thinking about Victoria McQueen. He’s on the road again and he’s picked up a new passenger: Vic’s own son.

    Yes, her name is Halloween. The cosmic universe is definitely playing some kind of sick joke on her. She’s the ultimate witch cliché, complete with a black cat and spooky house. Thank heavens she’s missing the warts and flying broom.When Halloween inherits her great-aunt’s manor, she decides to put the house to good use as a bed-and-breakfast. Her first guest is the sinfully good-looking Nicolas Marco, but he’s not here for the continental breakfast. Halloween discovers a ratty old book in the attic. It’s written in an unfamiliar language, and unknown to her, the tome is cursed.Halloween soon learns there’s a link between the book and her newfound talent as a necromancer. But her new skills come with a catch: the reanimated dead aren’t as cupcake-sweet as they were when they were alive. When a rival witch comes after the book, Halloween doesn’t know who to trust–the sexy vampire who says he wants to save the day, or the warlock who says he can destroy the book once and for all.Halloween had better learn fast. Because when the dead start rising, only a powerful witch can put them back under.

    NOBODY MESSES WITH HIS LIBRARIAN. . . Who killed Michael Vanderhorst’s maker? It’s a darn good question. But when the trail brings Michael to hellishly sunny Phoenix, Arizona, his biggest problem soon becomes a cute little librarian he can’t seem to stay away from. He’s never met a bigger danger magnet! Even her book cart has it out for her. And is that the drug cartel following her around, too? “Dear God, woman! What have you gotten yourself into?”Things go from bad to worse when local vampires won’t play nice.Can this four-hundred-year-old vampire keep his librarian safe and himself out of hot water? Can he bring his maker’s killer to justice? Yesterday, he would’ve said yes. But yesterday, he didn’t have a strange connection with a librarian. Yesterday, people weren’t trying to kill her.

    Paranormal Investigations. Consulting. Advice. Reasonable Rates. No Love Potions, Endless Purses, or Other Entertainment.Harry Dresden is the best at what he does. Well, technically, he's the only at what he does. So when the Chicago P.D. has a case that transcends mortal creativity or capability, they come to him for answers. For the "everyday" world is actually full of strange and magical things—and most don't play well with humans. That's where Harry comes in. Takes a wizard to catch a—well, whatever. There's just one problem. Business, to put it mildly, stinks.So when the police bring him in to consult on a grisly double murder committed with black magic, Harry's seeing dollar signs. But where there's black magic, there's a black mage behind it. And now that mage knows Harry's name. And that's when things start to get interesting.Magic - it can get a guy killed.

    Then the unthinkable happens, an attack that changes her life forever. And forever is a very long time for a vampire.Now working the night shift as a private investigator, Samantha is hired by Kingsley Fulcrum to investigate the murder attempt on his life, a horrific scene captured on TV and seen around the country. But as the case unfolds, Samantha discovers Kingsley isn't exactly what he appears to be; after all, there's a reason why he survived five shots to the head...

    Then she’s captured by Bones, a vampire bounty hunter, and is forced into an unlikely partnership.In exchange for help finding her father, Cat agrees to train with the sexy night stalker until her battle reflexes are as sharp as his fangs. She’s amazed she doesn’t end up as his dinner – are there actually good vampires? Pretty soon Bones will have her convinced that being half-dead doesn’t have to be all bad. But before she can enjoy her status as kick-ass demon hunter, Cat and Bones are pursued by a group of killers. Now Cat will have to choose a side … and Bones is turning out to be as tempting as any man with a heartbeat.

    Dan Shamble and his ghost girlfriend are called to the Vampire Circus when a fortune teller’s cards go missing. Not exactly the glamorous life, but the stakes escalate when a vampire trapeze act goes dead wrong, and Shamble discovers even more skeletons in the closet than the ones that live there. As he shuffles for clues through an unnatural cast of carnies, he faces a slate of suspects that could freak out even the most daring detective—a werewolf lion tamer, a fat lady with an enormous secret, an undead ringmaster…and what could be scarier than a circus clown? The only thing certain is that the show must go on—dead or alive.

    She's a witch. And she's heartless... literally.Mercy died twice. Once when she became a vampire. Again, when her own father had her heart cut out of her chest. But Mercy’s guide in the Craft had other ideas. The essence of her heart, now bound to her brother's soul, revived the vampire witch. But the Order of the Morning Dawn will stop at nothing to eliminate her. An organization devoted to two tasks-burning witches and vanquishing vampires-will literally go to hell and back in an effort to liberate Mercy's brother's soul and end Mercy’s vampiric life. If Mercy wants to live she must go to hell herself and capture her brother’s soul before the Order can get to him. Will Mercy survive, or will the Order finally eliminate one of the most notorious vampires in existence? Bloody Hell is the first book in Theophilus Monroe's Legacy of a Vampire Witch series. These vampires don’t sparkle. If Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles ever met the Mayfair witches you might end up with a character like Monroe's Mercy Brown. She is a ruthless, badass, snarky anti-hero straight out of your worst nightmares. But you will want to root for her nonetheless! Bloody Hell will take you from the time she was turned in the 1890s through the present day. Readers of Monroe's Voodoo Legacy will get a glimpse of her role in that series-from her own perspective-while being taken on a new action packed adventure and dark urban fantasy story that is wholly Mercy's own.