Gaimon gathers the best of his popular Q&A column—and pokes fun at his younger self.Despite the howling protests from his peers, no one’s ever been more willing to spill the beans on what it’s really like inside the pro cycling peloton than the sarcastic scribe Phil Gaimon. Building on the outrageous success of his hilarious 2014 debut, Pro Cycling on $10 a Day: From Fat Kid to Euro Pro, Gaimon gathers the absolute gems from his monthly Q&A feature column in VeloNews magazine into his new book, Ask a Pro: Deep Thoughts and Unreliable Advice from America’s Foremost Cycling Sage, adding a dose of fresh commentary and even more acerbic and sharp-eyed insights. With six years of material to work with—including his incredible rise into the pro ranks, the devastating loss of his contract for 2015, and his bold return to the Big League—Gaimon covers every possible topic from the team dinner table to the toilet with plenty of stops along the way. Gaimon offers wise-ass (and sometimes earnest) answers to fan questions like: · How much chamois cream should I use?· I’ve started shaving my legs. How can I be accepted by my friends?· What do you do to protect yourself when you know you’re about to crash?· How many bikes does my husband really need?· What’s the best victory celebration? Do you practice yours?· In women’s cycling, what is the proper definition of a pro?· What do you say to someone if they honk or almost hit you?· Do you name your bikes?· What do pros think when they see a recreational cyclist in a full pro kit or riding a pro-level bike?· Can you take your bike apart and put it back together?· How bad does the weather have to be to call off a training ride?· How do you know when it’s time to change a tire?· When you’re in a breakaway all day, do riders form a future friendship?· Riders keep complaining about "unsafe" weather at races. When did pro cyclists turn into such wussies?· How do the pros define a "crash"?Gaimon wields his outsider’s wit to cast a cock-eyed gaze at the peculiar manners, mores, and traditions that make the medieval sport of cycling so irresistible to watch. Ask a Pro includes new resources from Gaimon, too, including his Cookie Map of America, dubious advice on winning the race buffet, a cautionary guide for host housing, Phil’s pre-race warm-up routine, and a celebrity baker’s recipe for The Phil Cookie.

    When the 23-year-olds are transferred to a remote army unit, several hilarious situations follow, thanks to the stark novelty of a feminine presence in the traditionally male army. However, with each passing day, the differences in their personalities begin to emerge. Deepa is more ‘officer’: she insists on being called ‘Sahab’ and even takes to swearing like the troops. Anju is more ‘lady’: she can’t give up her make-up and Mills & Boon romances. Or resist the charms of a certain dashing young officer, despite her friend’s warnings to stay away. The girls frequently fall out and get back together, but face the same dilemma: is any man worth more than their uniform?

    His father was black, his mother a full-blood member of the Kickapoo Traditional Tribe of Texas. He remembers neither of them. Both disappeared soon after Concho’s birth and his Kickapoo grandmother raised him on the tribal reservation just outside Eagle Pass, Texas.Often bullied as a youth for his differences, Concho soon grew into the promise of his big hands and wide shoulders. Hatred of him remained in some; fear joined that emotion in others. Concho learned to walk a solitary path, which first took him away to college and then to Afghanistan as an Army Ranger.Now, a group of Neo-Nazi terrorists have taken over a mall in Eagle Pass. One hostage is the woman Concho loves. The only path Concho can see is straight ahead and through.

    The last thing Pandi expected was to run into a ship from the future on the outskirts of Sol system. Even less expected was that the ship would fall apart while she was inside it, the Universe correcting the paradox. The wormhole in the center of the ship beckoned, and Pandi jumped through, forty thousand years into the future. She arrived on a massive station built around a black hole. Once the center of a Galactic Civilization, the station was used to generate wormhole gates linking the Cosmos. The empty station is a memorial to the civilization that once was.One survivor, an immortal being called Watcher, remains, guarding the secrets of the station from those who covet its advanced technology. Watcher, lonely from his self-enforced exile, befriends Pandi. Soon the woman from Alabama discovers that there is more to Watcher than is apparent on the surface. What was Watcher's part in the fall of civilization? The answer to this question will determine whether Pandora Latham survives in this world, or becomes just one more death added to the trillions who went before her.Grand adventure in the tradition of Larry Niven and Poul Anderson, set in a far future in which many struggle for supremacy, and one woman from the past will decide the winner.

    Ajay Khurana, Before I started on the cruise trip where I met you, I was uncertain about travelling by myself. You changed my outlook towards travelling, and towards life. Despite all the wondrous changes you made in my life, I have a complaint; I can't stand your son. He is arrogant, mannerless and a complete womanizer. Every negative adjective that I can find for him would fall short in describing who he actually is. I am not sure why and what made him like that, but I wish you could take control of his life and train him to become a better person, someone who is respectful towards women. Thanks, Advika. If you don’t believe me, you can read this book and find out why I hate him so much. However, don’t judge him by his looks, and don’t kill him. After all, he is Ajay Khurana’s son; my favourite man in the world. Stop by and grab this book real soon. Let me know if you hate him as much as I do.

    With Arbitron ratings clocking over 3+ million listeners a week and simulcast daily in 37 million homes on Free Speech TV, where she is also the number one show, her strongest numbers are in the grand prize demographic of highly educated males 25-54, despite, or maybe because of , her status as an out gay woman. It probably explains the sublime effectiveness of her national billboard slogan: "Stephanie Miller...making men rise in the morning". Stephanie also headlined the country’s number one comedy tour, “Stephanie Miller’s Sexy Liberal Comedy Tour", as well as the number one comedy album, "Stephanie Miller's Sexy Liberal Comedy Album". She has recently had her second #1 comedy album in the country with her "Stephanie Miller's Happy Hour, Volume One". She frequents the Holy Trinity of cable news: CNN, MSNBC, and FOX, where she bursts the infallibility balloons of right wingers, often with one well-aimed pinpoint punchline. Here is SEXY LIBERAL!, which you can see as Al Franken rewritten by Sarah Silverman, Chelsea Handler horizontal on the desk of The Daily Show. Steph is the youngest child of Congressman William Miller of NY, Barry Goldwater’s running mate in 1964. We all know how that turned out. Though Steph was only 3, she shows here how that defeat affected her as much as it changed the Republican Party. It made her who she is. SEXY LIBERAL! is the book her 3,000,000 fans have been begging her to write. it’s both deeply personal and hilariously political. But most of all it is Stephanie’s unique voice, her jokes, her happy clappy optimism, and her truth that they tune in to day after day, that they download as a subscription podcast, that they buy tickets for, to see her unbleeped and in person. That’s what SEXY LIBERAL! delivers. Like an uncensored comedy drone right to your door!“Stephanie Miller is like ice cream for breakfast, or box-wine through a Krazy Straw: pure pleasure that some people say is bad for you, but you know better. Sexy Liberal! is deeply, deeply profane, big-hearted, surprising, and it might make you pee your pants a little. Just what you need! Read this book. Stephanie Miller for Everything, 2016!”--Rachel Maddow, host of The Rachel Maddow and author of Drift: The Unmooring of American Military Power “Sexy Liberal! is a great book with mind-expanding astuteness and side-splitting humor. Stephanie Miller is so wondrously witty and wise you will want to quote her. But, first, you must read her. Buy this book and help Amazon at last turn a profit. --Lily Tomlin “Sexy Liberal! is inspired reading. It is laugh-enhancing and beyond thought-provoking! A must read. --Jane Wagner Reading Stephanie's book is like being on the best kind of dinner date. The conversation is smart, funny and politically insightful. And Stephanie's contribution bad either. Seriously, what a fun read. Stephanie, in her wonderfully self-deprecating way, lets you into her brilliant mind, her no BS take on the political scene, and life itself. Enter at your own risk.--Rob Reiner

    Put your feet up and enjoy the laziest witch in Britain and her snarky, talkative cat!Ivy Wilde is not a hero. She doesn't want to be a hero. She wants to live a quiet, stress-free life that involves as little work as possible. If her innate magic can help her achieve that, then it's all to the good. Alas, you don't always get what you wish for.Slouch WitchWhen a bureaucratic disaster ends up with Ivy as the victim of a case of mistaken identity, she's yanked very unwillingly into Arcane Branch, the investigative department of the Hallowed Order of Magical Enlightenment. Her problems are quadrupled when a valuable object is stolen right from under the Order's noses.It doesn't exactly help that she's been magically bound to Adeptus Exemptus Raphael Winter. He might have piercing sapphire eyes and a body which a cover model would be proud of but, as far as Ivy's concerned, he's a walking advertisement for the joyless perils of too much witch-work.And if he makes her go to the gym again, she's definitely going to turn him into a frog.Star WitchWhen sapphire eyed Rafael Winter comes knocking at Ivy's door because he needs her to spy on the latest reality television series of Enchantment, she jumps at the chance. Hanging around a film set can't be hard ... or dangerous ... right?Spirit WitchIvy is flung once more into a world of intrigue, adventure and potential death and disaster. It's not her fault - it just so turns out that she's now the only person in the entire world who can communicate with the dead. And they're a chatty bunch with a list of demands.Sparkle Witch Christmas novellaYou would think December would be Ivy's ideal time of year. After all, festivities abound and witches everywhere are encouraged to put their feet up and relax. That's not quite the case when she has various Order members attempting to finagle her into Christmas activities - and a special artefact from the top of the Christmas tree goes missing.

    His impeccable record should speak for itself but he wasn’t taking any chances. When his commander volunteers him to head the annual Toys-For-Toddlers Christmas gala, saying no wasn’t an option. It seemed as though Sal had pulled off the impossible, even with only sixty days to do so. But at the last minute, things seemed to unravel and he found himself in over his head. Party planner was never going on his resume. Gloria, (Rori) Boudreau loved the holidays. Her business as a photographer and graphic designer was booming. Yet she needed to think about January, when it stalls out. When a part-time dispatcher position opened up at the police department, she grabs it. Timing was horrible, but it fit her schedule and it paid enough to ensure she could continue chasing her dream next year and that was all that mattered. Through the lens of Rori’s camera, everyone except Salvatore seemed to be enjoying the Christmas fundraiser. This was her reputation on line as well, and she needed it to be picture perfect. One way or another, she was determined to get a smile out of Salvatore. In the end, Salvatore lands more than a promotion. It might not be what he wanted for Christmas, but one moment, can change a lifetime. And he can’t wait until Christmas to unwrap this gift. Was what he had to offer enough for Rori? Salvatore didn’t want his love to end up amongst her unwanted gifts to return.

    He never knew how soon he and his fellow Raiders would have to prove themselves on the field of battle. After the failed coup to oust the emperor, the Novacks do not fade quietly into the background. They continue a low-grade insurgency, but in doing so, they open the door to other players that bring the entire empire to the brink of destruction. Sergeant a’Hope Hollow must lead a ragtag group of fellow non-humans in an attempt to avert a catastrophe that can wipe out humans forever. Read DEVOTION now.

    The guy she had a crush on in school is her mother’s best friend’s son who will also be at the party. She got over her school crush years ago, but she knows everyone will be giving her pitiful looks at the party and wedding that follows, which is the main reason for her to want to skip all the events. She can’t believe her luck when she finds out the handsome stranger who offers to give her a ride to the farmhouse is actually willing to attend the party as her boyfriend—her fake boyfriend. What happens when she needs to live the lie for more than just the one pre-wedding event and has to bring the fake boyfriend to the wedding? Is the handsome stranger willing to be part of the charade? Note: Fake Boyfriend is a short, contemporary romance.

    So Reed tries his hand at the detecting business and what follows is a humorous journey into suspense territory. FAREWELL, MY DEUCE (Book 4) Reed Ferguson returns in his most harrowing adventure yet! Life and the detecting business are running smoothly for private eye Reed Ferguson, until one of the Goofball Brothers goes missing. Reed leads the search and soon discovers Deuce's connection to some unscrupulous characters. As Reed learns more about Deuce's activities, the clues point to intrigue, danger and death. But will Reed find his friend alive, or will it be "Farewell, My Deuce." OUT OF THE PAST (Book 5) Compelled by a dark secret from his past, private investigator Reed Ferguson takes on his most unique case yet: bodyguard for young, spoiled trust-fund baby Stephanie McMahon. As Reed tries to protect her from her father’s enemies, he gets more than he bargained for. Things are not what they seem, no one can be trusted, and the past has a way of coming back to haunt us. And when suspicious deaths begin piling up, Reed knows he might be next. With a twisting plot and film noir fun that readers have come to expect, Out of the Past is Reed Ferguson at his best. TORCH SCENE (Book 6) Denver private investigator Reed Ferguson is between cases when a house fire threatens to consume the home of his girlfriend, Willie. The police think it's arson, and they look to Willie - the owner of the building - as the logical suspect. Worse yet, when a body is found in the charred third-floor apartment, the police think Willie is the killer. Reed hops into action to clear her name, but as his own list of suspects grows, so does the danger. Can Reed find the culprit who committed murder, or will his investigation go up in flames?

    When the system begins to misfire under the workload, the ill-equipped representatives of God and the Devil tasked with managing the process are given an ultimatum. Fix The Afternet or go back to your previous afterlives. They begin an odyssey through the hordes of souls awaiting judgement and the oblivious living in search of a solution. Rich in comic detail and populated with characters real and imagined from throughout time, their quest is never going to be straightforward…

    Three years into a twenty year mission to a new solar system, the colony ship Magellan and its ten million residents sent their last pulse message… "Peace with the Navereen is at an end." Trapped in Cargo Bay 37, fighter pilot Fristion Nash and twelve hundred others lived through the Magellan apocalypse. They have survived for a decade under Frank Block's exacting leadership. Now survival isn’t enough. Nash wants answers. Frank Block wants only control and obedience.Praise for Map Runners: “I found the book funny and exciting. I can't wait for the rest of them to come out.”

    Searching for answers from his own past, James suddenly finds himself back in war torn Britain in December 1944 facing a new and very dangerous reality. James is enlisted as a member of an RAF bomber crew and is forced to face the horror of war in the skies over Nazi occupied Europe, an icy death in the English Channel and an execution at the hands of a crazed Gestapo officer. He also finds love amidst the drama of war and finally discovers that the reality of life on our world isn’t quite what we think it is.Out of time follows on from the extraordinary success of The Angel of Time by Michael Stewart. If you enjoy the thrill of historic war-time fiction coupled with a thought provoking twist. All sales during November will be donated to The Poppy Appeal!

    Treaties are signed, trade is restored. But spies and diplomatic turmoil lead to a high-tech cold war of epic proportions. Ex Space Marine Gina Wilcox finds herself in a law enforcement career after the war, but life can be just as dangerous on the streets as the battlefield. Sleeper cells activate, assassinating government officials. Crime syndicates flourish. And a certain high-tech android has been stolen by the League, spirited off world for unknown purposes. Into this milieu a band of Marine outcasts join the fight. They spent more time in the brig than on the battlefield, yet racked up admirable wartime kill ratios. These renegades are quietly recruited by Republican Naval Intelligence to lead black ops against the League. Gina Wilcox will join their leader Commander Hamilton Wolf in a risky interstellar quest to retrieve an android who doesn’t even realize she’s not human. The fate of two civilizations hangs in the balance . . .