Damn, now I sound stupid, too." -Bomani Jones, ESPN "It's great, and I have no idea what just happened, but Jerry Jones dick exploded and that's enough for me." -Spencer Hall, SB Nation "The only parody Twitter account worth following" -Deadspin.com "This is the least influential book of anything I've ever read. I hated it." -Adolf Hitler In what is being hailed by many, probably, as the best, funniest, most gut-shittingly poignant literary work since The New Testament, PFT Commenter takes you on a realistic-fiction journey through the backdoor politics of today's NFL. Set in the 2014 offseason, Roger Goodell and President Barack Obama become locked in a mano a mano battle over the future of the Dallas Cowboys, culminating in a literal fight to the death. Starring NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, Barack Obama, Mike Ditka, Joe Biden, Michael Vick, Peter King, Ron Jaworski, Dan Snyder, Robert Griffin III, Danny Woodhead, J.J. Watt, Jerry Jones, Russell Wilson, Pete Carroll, and many more of your favorite NFL stars and media personalities; "Goodell vs. Obama: The Battle for the Future of the NFL" will take you on a journey that any NFL fan is sure to love, or at least not hate. WARNING: Told through the narrative eye and screaming mouth of an uneducated internet commenter, this book is filled with grammatical errors. It was written by a someone who was raised on scorching hot sports takes, light beer, and an undying love for Roger Goodell. He cares about TELLING, not about spelling. If that's going to be a problem,, there's the door.

    

    An unexpected inheritance. A chance for a new beginning. Lily’s no stranger to loss, but her life takes its most tragic turn the day her husband is killed. Unable to escape the memories surrounding her, she jumps at the chance to return to happy summer memories in the beautiful Pacific Northwest, where she spent summers as a teenager. She inherits Glass Beach Cottage from her late uncle and leaves behind the life she’s known, including her beloved son, for a new adventure.The rhythm of the ocean soothes her. Her heart begins to mend during morning strolls along the beach with her dog.  She encounters a kindness in the residents of the tiny coastal town. A young man who lost his hearing as a teen, a local shopkeeper who offers her a helping hand, and a widower and veterinarian, who persuades Lily to foster a new puppy, form her circle of friends.As guests come and go, she gains insight into the joys and sorrows of those who spend a few days at Glass Beach Cottage. Along with the healing power of the sea, Lily witnesses the strength of the human spirit and learns that the best remedy for her grief lies in the restorative power of helping others. Award-winning author, Tammy L. Grace, brings readers her new GLASS BEACH COTTAGE SERIES. The first book, BEACH HAVEN, is a heartwarming story of a woman’s resilience buoyed by the bonds of friendship, an unexpected gift, and the joy she finds in helping others.  Escape with a new favorite series and read BEACH HAVEN today. Read more from award-winning author, Tammy L. Grace HOMETOWN HARBOR SERIES Hometown Harbor: The Beginning (Prequel Novella) Finding Home Home Blooms Promise of Home Pieces of Home Finally Home COOPER HARRINGTON DETECTIVE NOVELS Killer Music Deadly Connection Dead Wrong GLASS BEACH COTTAGE SERIES Beach Haven STAND-ALONE BOOKS A Season of Hope (Christmas Novella)

     However, unbeknown to Sandra, the inclusion of her husband’s mother and his maiden aunt in the three week holiday meant that not all family members would be happy to just idle away time. For a recent unsolved murder in Pentrillick would intrigue the two not-so-young ladies, and after examining the facts, they would feel duty-bound to see if they could help bring about a satisfactory conclusion to the mystery. The Chocolate Box Holiday is the first in a new light-hearted series of books set in Pentrillick on the south coast of Cornwall.

    Soon the snow was so deep that she couldn't move. She could feel her shoes disintegrating and her feet were numb. The sky cleared and a great big moon came out and there were so many stars. She remembered what her mother had said before she died, that each star was one of her people. She musn't give up now . . .'When their mother dies and their father, in his grief, burns down their wagon and runs away, Kath and Ella - gypsy sisters - suddenly become orphans. With no one to turn to for help, they face hardship and hunger at every turn. Will their special sisters' bond be strong enough to see them to safety?From the bestselling author of Miss Appleby's Academy and Far From My Father's House comes a heartwarming tale of family and overcoming adversity.

    He never saw them again. Their bodies were never found, and Adam himself was discovered with his back pressed against an oak tree and his shoes filled with blood. The Likeness: Still traumatised by her brush with a psychopath, Detective Cassie Maddox transfers out of the Murder squad and starts a relationship with fellow detective Sam O'Neill. When he calls her to the scene of his new case, she is shocked to find that the murdered girl is her double. Faithful Place: The course of Frank Mackey's life was set by one defining moment when he was nineteen. The moment his girlfriend, Rosie Daly, failed to turn up for their rendezvous in Faithful Place, failed to run away with him to London as they had planned. Broken Harbour: In Broken Harbour, a ghost estate outside Dublin - half-built, half-inhabited, half-abandoned - two children and their father are dead. The mother is on her way to intensive care. Scorcher Kennedy is given the case because he is the Murder squad's star detective. The Secret Place: Even in her exclusive boarding school, in the graceful golden world that Stephen has always longed for, bad things happen and people have secrets. The previous year, Christopher Harper, from the neighbouring boys' school, was found murdered on the grounds. The Trespasser: Being on the Dublin Murder squad is nothing like Detective Antoinette Conway dreamed. Her working life is a stream of thankless cases and harassment. Antoinette is tough, but she's getting close to the breaking point.

    

    Framed for a brutal murder, Jake Hunter, a summer associate at a prestigious Manhattan law firm, finds himself caught up in a harrowing game of cat and mouse that puts his friends and family in grave danger. When Jake discovers his mentor, the firm's biggest rainmaker, lying in a pool of blood and near death, the attorney's final words lead Jake to evidence that could topple the highest ranks of the Russian mafia. Unable to go to the police, who are convinced that he is the killer, Jake is forced to go on the run. With only three days to save himself, his new girlfriend, and his kidnapped younger brother, Jake's time is running out. Unsure of who to trust, and faced with a dark secret from his past, Jake quickly learns that nothing is as it seems. Only one thing is certain-with the Russian mob, the FBI, two mercenary spies, and a private detective all hot on his trail-everyone is Chasing Hunter.

    

    But his deductive abilities will be put to the test when he’s called on to detect philatelic forgeries at Thwaites, one of the city’s great auction houses. The recently knighted cat also finds time to coach a croquet team, oversee rehearsals of a sequel to Cats, and help deliver a baby. Not to be outdone by cheesy actors or blundering attorneys, he makes his film debut and testifies in a criminal trial at the Old Bailey. But he has a special place in his heart for St. James’s Palace, the address he longs to call home. This delightful sequel to James the Connoisseur will prove irresistible catnip for feline lovers.

    . .It’s 1981. Eleven-year-old Sadie adores her beautiful and vibrant mother, Connie, whose dreams of making it big as a singer fill their tiny house in Leeds. It’s always been just the two of them. Until the unthinkable happens.Jean hasn’t seen her good-for-nothing daughter Connie since she ran away from the family home in Harlow – or Pram Town as its inhabitants affectionately call it – aged seventeen and pregnant.But in the wake of the Royal Wedding, Jean gets a life-changing call: could she please come and collect the granddaughter she’s never met?We all know how Charles and Diana turned out, and Jean and Sadie are hardly a match made in heaven – but is there hope of a happy ending for them?Written in Joanna Nadin’s trademark dazzling prose, The Talk of Pram Town tells the story of three generations of Earnshaws and asks whether it always has to be like mother, like daughter . .

    Her only escape is the perfect couple she watches through the train window every day, happy and in love. Or so it appears. When Rachel learns that the woman she's been secretly watching has suddenly disappeared, she finds herself as a witness and even a suspect in a thrilling mystery in which she will face bigger revelations than she could ever have anticipated.Adapted from Paula Hawkins' novel - an international phenomenon selling over twenty million copies worldwide - this gripping new play will keep you guessing until the final moment.

    Poised to become the youngest partner in his firm, an act of revenge derails his dreams and sets his life on a whole new course. Tried and convicted by the court of his self-righteous father, Michael is forced to work for the Public Defender’s office. It is in this office he meets the person that will change his life forever, Shamika Carrington. Shamika Carrington is a sixteen year old girl who is being charged with the murder of her father. Michael instantly connects with the young girl and vows to fight for her freedom. There’s one major issue, Shamika confessed to stabbing her father to death. As Michael digs into the motive behind the murder, he begins to uncover stones that a powerful person is determined to keep covered. Nothing is as it seems as he struggles to win the most difficult case of his career and save Shamika from a first degree murder conviction.

    She vows to find a man on every continent for some pure no-strings-attached fun. Adriana is stunning and can have any man she desires.Yet she wants an eligible bachelor who'll slip a five-carat Harry Winston diamond on her finger. Leigh has a doting boyfriend that most girls would kill for. But when literary bad boy Jesse Chapman asks to work with her, she just can't refuse. Knocking back raspberry mojitos one night, the three friends make a pact - to change one thing in their lives by the end of the year. Game On. (Large Print Edition)

    But he’s called away to deal with a crisis in Hong Kong and she’s left to settle into a new country on her own. One by one, her three grown-up children need help with major life problems and there’s only her to help them, because as usual, Paul puts his job first. Then she finds out that her husband's been unfaithful for years, and it’s the final blow to their marriage, especially as she’s met another man she finds attractive and kind. Her confidence grows as she wins acclaim as an embroidery artist and then she comes into an inheritance. Will her loyalty keep her with her husband, as it has before, or will Paul get more than he’d bargained for with the new, independent Rosalind?