Some only did it in college, or got out by sheer determination, good luck . . . or suicide. Others took it on as permanent employment. And many remain haunted by nightmare scenarios where they are the sole server in a restaurant packed with complaining patrons. For all those disenchanted current and former food service employees, Darron Cardosa has your back. His career began at a Texas steakhouse in 1984, and since 2008 he’s vented his frustrations in the popular blog The Bitchy Waiter. A snarky mix of David Sedaris, Anthony Bourdain, Erma Bombeck, and Mo Rocca, Cardosa distills 30 years of food service into dark, funny tales—about crazy customers, out-of-control egos, and what really goes on in that fancy restaurant—that anyone who worked in the industry will recognize and relate to.

    A man's promising fourth date ends in the emergency room. A female lawyer with bipolar disorder experiences the highs and lows of dating. A widower hesitates about introducing his children to his new girlfriend. A divorcée in her seventies looks back at the beauty and rubble of past relationships.These are just a few of the people who tell their stories in Modern Love, Revised and Updated, featuring dozens of the most memorable essays to run in The New York Times "Modern Love" column since its debut in 2004.Some of the stories are unconventional, while others hit close to home. Some reveal the way technology has changed dating forever; others explore the timeless struggles experienced by anyone who has ever searched for love. But all of the stories are, above everything else, honest. Together, they tell the larger story of how relationships begin, often fail, and--when we're lucky--endure.Edited by longtime "Modern Love" editor Daniel Jones and featuring a diverse selection of contributors--including Mindy Hung, Trey Ellis, Ann Hood, Deborah Copaken, Terri Cheney, and more--this is the perfect book for anyone who's loved, lost, stalked an ex on social media, or pined for true romance: In other words, anyone interested in the endlessly complicated workings of the human heart.

    Find out what made them consider this in the first place, how they did it, and why they have no regrets! Bonus chapters include Jen’s special recipe for making bite-sized éclairs and a packing list for YOUR move to Costa Rica!

    The moving, uplifting true story of an unlikely friendship between a man on the streets and the ginger cat who adopts him and helps him heal his life.

    

    (To date, it has won no fewer than 31 Emmys.) Seriously... I'm Kidding, Degeneres' first book in eight years, brings us up to date about the life of a kindhearted woman who bowed out of American Idol because she didn't want to be mean. Lively; hilarious; often sweetly poignant.

    I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging dickhead. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world. —from the IntroductionActual reader feedback: "I find it truly appalling that there are people in the world like you. You are a disgusting, vile, repulsive, repugnant, foul creature. Because of you, I don't believe in God anymore. No just God would allow someone like you to exist." "I'll stay with God as my lord, but you are my savior. I just finished reading your brilliant stories, and I laughed so hard I almost vomited. I want to bring that kind of joy to people. You're an artist of the highest order and a true humanitarian to boot. I'm in both shock and awe at how much I want to be you." Now with 16 Pages of Photos and a New Introduction

    Her teacher was busy chatting, so we waited patiently in the corridor. When he did come out, he indicated that the meeting would take place downstairs and headed off with us in tow. Before sitting down, I introduced myself using my first name, and put out my hand to be shaken. He mumbled back his full name as he took my hand, although I suspect he would have been shocked if I had actually dared use it. By this stage, I had already understood that teachers did not expect to be questioned about their practices. Of course, I did—question him, that is; politely and almost deferentially. There was a slight pause, as he dipped his head to better digest what he had heard. Then, with the assurance of a perfect, unarguable answer, he replied, “But you are in France, Madame”. Some months before, my husband, three children and I had casually unzipped and discarded our comfortable Australian lifestyle and slipped on life in the country of haute couture. On arrival, there was no celebrity designer waiting for us, ready to pin and fit our new life to us; so we threw it on and wore it loosely, tightly, uncomfortably, any old how—until we learned for ourselves how to trim, hem and stitch à la française. This book is testament to the joyous, but not always easy, journey that we took along the way.

    But success wouldn’t have happened for this songwriter, artist and producer without the darker times of defeat. Now, in this daringly honest memoir, DioGuardi reveals everything she’s learned about living, creating, loving, stumbling, picking herself up again and ultimately succeeding.  And, of course, she hares behind-the-scenes stories from her years on American Idol, including the real truth about her departure from the show.  Passionate, wide and funny, A Helluva High Note inspires readers to find, develop and follow their own true voice.

    In this book, Alan and Lorna discover that their local town is not quite as sleepy as they had first imagined and that the local ladies will stand by you once their friendship is won. Alan and Lorna make some great new friends and have a few more unexpected adventures along the way. Add an appearance on Canadian TV into the mix, plus the trials and tribulations of alpaca farming, and this sequel will bring you bang up to date with the lives of two British expats in rural Spain.

    One bottle a night was never quite enough. When she tried to cut down, she found it nearly impossible to have an alcohol-free day.Everyone around could see her drinking, but no one realised what a serious problem it was. She was high-functioning, fun-loving Lotta, not some messy, hopeless drunk. Only Lotta knew how sick and twisted her thinking about wine had become.Desperate and miserable, she was falling deeper and deeper into a boozy hellhole and running out of ideas about what she could do to stop it. What's a girl to do when her beloved wine becomes the enemy?Here's what Lotta did. She stopped drinking and secretly started a blog that charted the highs and lows of learning to live without alcohol. Mrs D was anonymous, honest and, as Lotta would discover, surrounded by people who would help her on her journey, and whom she could help in return.

    In close proximity to the successes and heartbreaks of her son's career, Denise watched her son's painful descent into alcoholism and depression. This revealing account tells the tale of AJ’s rise to superstardom, his decline into addiction, and his struggles through rehab, and offers a look at the harsh world of the music industry.

    It’s about the hurdles of breaking the barriers of centuries, of family circles being broken with no goodbyes, of heartbreak and estrangement, and of the transitions and adjustments to a new way of living. But it is also, and more so, a story of leaving the old and embracing the new, of walking in the blessing of freedom from bondage, and of leaving behind the fear of tomorrow. It is the story of a family living, loving, and laughing their way along the journey of life. About the Author Rebecca Borntrager Graber was born into an Amish family of ten children. She lost her mother at the tender age of ten and later taught school in the Amish parochial schools. She married Lester Graber, who was ordained as an Amish minister the second year they were married. Rebecca and Lester were shunned by the Amish church thirteen years later, after taking a bold stand against some extra-biblical Amish rules. Rebecca always enjoyed writing and was a frequently published author in Family Life, Young Companion, and Blackboard Bulletin, which were monthly magazines published by the Amish. She has conducted many women’s Bible study groups in her home, taught Bible classes at a local jail, and carried on correspondence with prisoners from a variety of jails and prisons. At present Rebecca, her husband, Lester, and their youngest daughter, Dorcas, live in Fort Worth, Texas, where they are members of Eagle Mountain International Church.

    I hated working for him and I hated being around him. I hated it when he walked through the front door at home. And we feared him from the moment he pulled up in front of the house in his car.” So writes conservative firebrand and popular radio host Larry Elder. For ten years Elder and his father did not talk to each other. When they finally did, the conversation went on for eight hours—eight hours that took Elder on his father’s journey from the Jim Crow South, to service in the Marine Corps, to starting a business in Southern California. Elder emerged not just reconciled with his dad, but admiring him, and realizing that he had never fully known him or understood him.  Heartfelt, beautifully written, compulsively readable, A Lot Like Me—originally published as Dear Father, Dear Son—is both a powerfully affecting memoir and a personal, provocative slice of American history.

    But the historic landfall of October 1492 was only a secondary event of the year. The preceding January, they had accepted the surrender of Muslim Granada, ending centuries of Islamic rule in their peninsula. And later that year, they had ordered the expulsion or forced baptism of Spain's Jewish minority, a cruel crusade undertaken in an excess of zeal for their Catholic faith. Europe, in the century of Ferdinand and Isabella, was also awakening to the glories of a new age, the Renaissance, and the Spain of the "Catholic Kings" - as Ferdinand and Isabella came to be known - was not untouched by this brilliant revival of learning. Here, from the noted historian Malveena McKendrick, is their remarkable story.