Half of the essays are brand new, the others are all reworked and rewritten, based on pieces that were originally published in Golf Digest. Often biting, usually cranky, always hilarious and surprising—this is Dan Jenkins at his best, writing about the sport he loves the most.      "I've always wanted to do something for the golfer who has everything. I thought about a suede golf cart, or maybe a pair of cashmere Footjoys. Then I settled on writing this book." So begins Dan Jenkins's latest—and funniest—collection of golf essays. The book consists of thirty-eight essays, all of them, as Dan says in the first essay, are "literally throbbing with opinion."     In this book Dan delves into the greatest rounds of golf he's ever seen; the funniest things said on a golf course; the rivalries on tour and in the press box; the game's most magical moments—and its most absurd. Unplayable Lies is an ode to the game Jenkins loves. But it is Dan Jenkins, so nothing—even the game of golf—can escape his wrath, his critical eye, or his acerbic pen. The best way to describe it is to turn the book over to Mr. Jenkins:      In "Titanic and I"—probably the most hilarious and surprising essay in the book, telling true stories of Titanic Thompson: gambler, golf hustler, accused murderer, legendary storyteller—Dan explains how Titanic would win a wager by saying he could knock a bird off a telephone wire: "Titanic would drop a ball on the ground and take out his four-wood, waggle it, and pretend to aim at the bird on the wire. When some sucker would bet him he couldn't do it, Ti would pull out a gun he carried and shoot the bird off the wire."     In "The Greatest Rounds": "Show me a man who doesn't know what Arnold did in the last round of the '60 U.S. Open at Cherry Hills, and I'll show you a soccer fan in Paraguay."     This is a perfect follow up to His Ownself. It even has an Introduction by Sally Jenkins, one of the country's top sportswriters and Dan's own darling daughter.

    Koalas look cuddly, but they're actually irritable, solitary beasts who do not want belly rubs. What kind of mocking god created creatures with poofy ears and big black noses that don't want belly rubs? BOpossums: North America gets one lousy marsupial, and let's just say it's not going to win any beauty contests. Or even not-ugly contests. C−Wombats: "Wombat" is a great name. It's got a "wom" and a "bat," and an "omba." They're kind of nondescript animals, cute in a generic pudgy mammal way, but their name spelled backward is "tabmow," and that makes all the difference. AThe Book of Ratings is hysterically arbitrary and undeniably infectious.

    The lure of the Island has made it the top tourist destination in the state of Michigan. However, Mackinac Island holds many secrets. These secrets come in many forms—some from beyond the grave, others passed down for hundreds of years.If you have been to Mackinac Island many times before, or you have not yet visited this gem of the Great Lakes, the stories in this book will both inform and entertain you.Inside this book you will not only find many of the Island's ghost stories, legends, and tragic tales, but also a brief history describing each location. In addition, stories from the Straits of Mackinac, including deadly shipwrecks, ghost ships, and other tragedies, are included. Last, for those unfamiliar with ghostly phenomena, you will find a chapter with a crash course introduction to the who, what, when, why, and where of ghosts.

    The topics may vary widely, from love to mental illness to the most recent "Florida Man" headline, but it's all in the same handwriting. Welcome to The Immortal Soul Salvage Yard.

    It springs spontaneously from the lofty hearts and makes its own way to unite with its generous reciprocators. At times, it becomes dry and seeks the abundance of a big-hearted lover. In other scenarios, the river gets frozen and looks for the warmth of a passionate soul. And in some cases, it may just be ready and waiting to leap forth from its humble abode. All it takes is just a little stroke of fate for that river to unleash itself and flow in its full glory.'Unleash That River' is an anthology of six short stories of love and contemporary romance.1) Keys: When Dhyey returns home to meet his mother after several months, he discovers that she has started sharing the house with a beautiful tenant, Nishita who not only holds the key to his house, but to his locked heart as well.2) Dot Every 'i' And Cross Every 't':Varun and Puja met for the first time through an arranged marriage proposal. However, in order to make sure that they are the ones who can really complement each other for the rest of their lives, they must take a step out of their comfort zones, and do something unprecedented and outright crazy.3) Why Not:Neel and Rashi both have miserably failed at their first romantic endeavor. Will they keep cursing their rotten luck and ask why? Or will they reclaim the charge of their lives to embrace the second chance and say why not?4) Immeasurable Nouns:Aditi and Kartik are the academic stars of their class and each other’s arch rivals. Aditi hates boys. But Kartik secretly loves her. To win her heart, he must wait for the right moment and make every move cautiously. One day, during an English class, that moment presents itself in its full bloom.5) Madly In Marriage:Swayam and Soniya have not left any stone unturned to avoid marrying each other. But their families see this union as a match made in heaven and are hellbent to see it through. 6) Hearts And Ice-creams:Tushar is obsessed with finding his childhood crush who disappeared out of his life without a clue. Fifteen years later, will he be able to move on or destiny has yet to play its last trick?

    When a group of out-out-town friends investigating the legends are driven off the road by a mysterious hearse, their night of cheap thrills turns to chills as they begin to die one by one. ISLAND OF THE DOLLSDeep within an ancient Aztec canal system on the outskirts of Mexico City lies Isla de las Munecas...a reportedly haunted island infested with thousands of decrepit dolls. While there to film a television documentary, several friends discover a brutal murder. Soon fear and paranoia turn them against one another - even as the unknown killer stalks them throughout the longest night of their lives.

    The 300 Calorie Cookbook offers slimmed-down versions of your favorite foods, with family-pleasing recipes for burgers, sandwiches, soups and stews, salads, main courses, even casseroles-all just 300 calories or less per serving.Betty Crocker takes all the guesswork and effort out of calorie counting at mealtime by providing clear calorie counts, comparisons for food swaps, full nutrition information for each recipe, and calorie charts for common ingredients.With 300 low-calorie recipes, you'll never run out of tasty, satisfying meals that will still help you stay on trackOffers a simple, fad-free way to control portion size-perfect for anyone looking to lose or maintain their weight with low-cal dishes or for people with diabetes and anyone who has to carefully monitor their calorie intakeForty inspiring full-color photos, proving that healthy cooking can be hearty and deliciousThe 300 Calorie Cookbook offers easy solutions for anyone counting their calories, letting you watch your weight without sacrificing great taste or favorite family dishes.

    These texts are characterized by a startling and macabre novelty, with elements of the grotesque, fantastic and child-like touching the imagination of the everyday. They express the cultural landscape of Stalinism -- years of show trials, mass atrocities and stifled political life. Their painful, unsettling eloquence testify to the humane and the comic in this absurdist writer's work. The translator Neil Cornwall gives a biographical introduction to his subject, enlarged upon by the poet Hugh Maxton in a contextual assessment of the writing of Flann O'Brien, Le Fanu and Doyle, and of their shared concerns with detective fiction, terror and death. Daniil Kharms 91905-42) died under Stalin. Along with fellow poets and prose-writers of the era -- Khlebnikov, Biely, Mandelstam, Zabolotsky and Pasternak -- he is one of the emerging experimentalists of Russian modernism.

    8 pages of illustrations.

    In ‘Cora Lee is Stupid’ a young girl takes vengeance on an abusive older sister. In ‘Dead Weight’ three bank robbers get more than they bargained for during their getaway. In ‘Rosetta Stone’ a bitter young man comes face to face with the end of the world.

    Baby becomes distressed at feeding times and refuses to feed or eats very little despite obvious hunger. Why won’t he/she eat? This is a question parents ask numerous health professionals while searching for a solution. Babies are typically diagnosed with one, two or three medical conditions to explain their aversive feeding behavior during brief appointments. Consequently, many parents don’t receive an effective solution from the health professionals they consult. This is why this book is so necessary. Rowena Bennett is an Australian nurse who holds professional qualifications in various nursing fields including pediatrics, midwifery, child health, mental health and lactation consultant. She has over 20 years experience advising parents how to resolve infant feeding and sleeping problems. Rowena has helped over 1000 babies get over their aversion to bottle-feeding and enjoy feeding once again. Parents claim the relief is life changing. In Your Baby’s Bottle-feeding Aversion, Rowena describes the various reasons babies display aversive feeding behavior, explains how the reader can identify the cause, and describes effective solutions. Included are step-by-step instructions on how to resolve a behavioral feeding aversion that occurs as a result of being repeatedly pressured to feed - the most common of all reasons for babies to become averse to feeding. Your Baby’s Bottle-feeding Aversion provides practical professional feeding advice that not only makes good sense, it works!

    The Gamer’s Edition is the ultimate guide to videogames, packed full of the most up-to-date news, achievements and developments in the gaming world, illustrated with the best and most exciting imagery from this year’s top titles. Complete with fascinating facts, figures and features on the most popular games, the latest edition also includes gameplay tips and hints, retro facts from classic games, and your favorite characters battling it out against each other in our new "Vs" feature. One of the features we’ve included here brings you the results of our readers' poll of the most visually stunning videogame graphics ever. As game graphics become ever more stylized, fast-moving and impressive, we guide you through a visual feast of the 50 titles you ranked as the very greatest. To participate in the poll for next year’s book, please visit www.guinnessworldrecords.com/gamers. We’d love to hear from you, and you could win yourself a prize!

    People need cheering up. I have the answer. ‘Pills, Thrills and Methadone Spills: Adventures of a Community Pharmacist’ is a collection of the best blogs, tweets and anecdotes about the wonderful world of pharmacy.“If the shutter is three quarters down, then we are shut and not just vertically challenged”...“Gave me huge insight into the ‘real’ world of community pharmacy – I didn’t realise just how much pharmacists deal with on a day to day basis, so for me this was very informative, but in a reallyclever, and massively funny way!” Lucy Pitt, Marketing Manager, The Pharmacy Show“As well as being brilliantly funny, this book is a refreshingly honest view of the world of pharmacy. From student pharmacists to the fully-qualified, every chapter provides a story that the reader can relate to and enjoy.” Georgia Salter, Pharmacy Student“A well observed reflection of life in pharmacy with very funny reflections” Catherine Duggan, Royal Pharmaceutical Society"It is always fun to be reminded that pharmacists' perils and fun at the workplace are similar irrespective of which country we practise in!" Selina Hui-Hoong Wee , Pharmacist, Malaysia“A great entertaining and amusing read" Mike Holden, Chief Executive, National Pharmacy AsociationThanks to Laura Martins for her initial book cover design!

    The theme is the experience of Longden watching LOST FOR WORDS become a TV drama along with a collection of observations of life at home and abroad.

    Some mammoths were smaller than children. Owls are the dumbest birds in the world. Very few people with Tourette's syndrome swear. You can't get a six-pack from doing sit-ups. King Arthur's sword wasn't called Excalibur. Milk doesn't make your bones strong. There's no bones in your fingers. The Bible states that humans can't become angels. Humans have more than two nostrils. It's impossible to slide down a bannister. At a wedding, the bride doesn't walk down the aisle. Ties were invented for war, not fashion. Most Disney classics made almost no money. Slavery has only been illegal in the UK since 2010. George Washington wasn't the first American President. Velcro doesn’t exist. Nobody knows why we sleep.