You're Not Listening: What You're Missing and Why It Matters


Kate Murphy - 2020
    So do our politicians.We're not listening.And no one is listening to us.Despite living in a world where technology allows constant digital communication and opportunities to connect, it seems no one is really listening or even knows how. And it’s making us lonelier, more isolated, and less tolerant than ever before. A listener by trade, New York Times contributor Kate Murphy wanted to know how we got here.In this always illuminating and often humorous deep dive, Murphy explains why we’re not listening, what it’s doing to us, and how we can reverse the trend. She makes accessible the psychology, neuroscience, and sociology of listening while also introducing us to some of the best listeners out there (including a CIA agent, focus group moderator, bartender, radio producer, and top furniture salesman). It’s time to stop talking and start listening.

Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason


Alfie Kohn - 2005
    In this truly groundbreaking book, nationally respected educator Alfie Kohn begins instead by asking "What do kids need — and how can we meet those needs?" What follows from that question are ideas for working with children rather than doing things to them. One basic need all children have, Kohn argues, is to be loved unconditionally, to know that they will be accepted even if they screw up or fall short. Yet conventional approaches to parenting such as punishments (including "time-outs"), rewards (including positive reinforcement), and other forms of control teach children that they are loved only when they please us or impress us. Kohn cites a body of powerful, and largely unknown, research detailing the damage caused by leading children to believe they must earn our approval. That's precisely the message children derive from common discipline techniques, even though it's not the message most parents intend to send. More than just another book about discipline, though, Unconditional Parenting addresses the ways parents think about, feel about, and act with their children. It invites them to question their most basic assumptions about raising kids while offering a wealth of practical strategies for shifting from "doing to" to "working with" parenting — including how to replace praise with the unconditional support that children need to grow into healthy, caring, responsible people. This is an eye-opening, paradigm-shattering book that will reconnect readers to their own best instincts and inspire them to become better parents.

Baby-led Weaning: Helping Your Baby to Love Good Food


Gill Rapley - 2008
    It shows parents why baby-led weaning makes sense and gives them the confidence to trust their baby's natural skills and instincts. Filled with practical tips for getting started and the low-down on what to expect, Baby-led Weaning explodes the myth that babies need to be spoon-fed and shows why self-feeding from the start is the healthiest way for your child to develop. Your baby is allowed to decide how much they want to eat, how to eat it and to experiment with everything at their own pace. Baby-led weaning is a common-sense, safe, easy and enjoyable approach to feeding your baby. No more purées and weaning spoons, and no more mealtime battles. Simply let your baby feed himself healthy family food.

Far from the Tree: Parents, Children, and the Search for Identity


Andrew Solomon - 2012
    He writes about families coping with deafness, dwarfism, Down's syndrome, autism, schizophrenia, or multiple severe disabilities; with children who are prodigies, who are conceived in rape, who become criminals, who are transgender. While each of these characteristics is potentially isolating, the experience of difference within families is universal, and Solomon documents triumphs of love over prejudice in every chapter.All parenting turns on a crucial question: to what extent should parents accept their children for who they are, and to what extent they should help them become their best selves. Drawing on ten years of research and interviews with more than three hundred families, Solomon mines the eloquence of ordinary people facing extreme challenges.Elegantly reported by a spectacularly original and compassionate thinker, Far from the Tree explores how people who love each other must struggle to accept each other—a theme in every family’s life.

Beyond Time-Out: From Chaos to Calm


Beth A. Grosshans - 2008
    TV’s Supernanny regularly captures kids wildly, unbelievably out of control. How did our families get to such a state? Child psychologist Dr. Beth Grosshans has the answer. And mothers and fathers everywhere are listening. In what is sure to become a much-discussed blockbuster, Dr. Grosshans reveals why she believes nearly a half-century of parenting advice—with its emphasis on talking, exalting children’s self-esteem, and time-outs—is largely to blame for today’s lack of discipline. Her innovative ideas and techniques challenge this prevailing culture, proving that power and authority are as essential as love and good intentions to effective parenting. She persuasively explains why kids can only grow up healthy and strong when firmly led by their parents’ experience and better judgment, and provides a clear, easy five step program to follow. She enables parents to look at themselves clearly and identify their child-rearing style; they are often shocked to discover how their own behavior has inadvertently caused an imbalance in the family’s structure. Reading Beyond Time-Out is akin to sitting with Dr. Grosshans in her clinical office—and her core truths about healthy parent-child relationships are timeless.

Understanding Your Child's Sensory Signals


Angie Voss - 2015
    PLUS BONUS CONTENT...Sensory in a Nutshell! Just a little bit more, but not too much to overwhelm you. This practical, daily application handbook is helping parents, teachers, and caregivers all over the world to understand sensory signals and cues from a child rather than jumping to the conclusion of behavior driven. This user friendly "go to" handbook is geared for daily use and as a quick sensory reference guide designed to work hand in hand with ASensoryLife.com, where you can find printable handouts, sensory how-to videos, sensory tools and equipment ideas and links, as well as a sensory ideas on a budget. Enjoy the simple, organized format to give you the essential and useful information to respond to the child's sensory needs right on the spot! The handbook provides simple every day sensory strategies and techniques to help ALL children; including SPD, autism spectrum disorders, ADD/ADHD, APD, and developmental disabilities. This handbook provides guidance and understanding as to why children do what they do in regards to unique sensory processing differences and needs. When you respect a child's sensory differences, it will change how you respond. Keep it Real. Keep it Simple. Keep it Sensory!

Calm the F*ck Down: The Only Parenting Technique You’ll Ever Need


David Vienna - 2015
    This book is for you. Based on his viral blog post and addressing concerns from “my baby won’t poop” to “my boy likes girl toys” to “everything costs too much,” David Vienna‘s wise and funny parenting advice will amuse and inform—and remind you that (almost) nothing is worth freaking out about.-Includes advice from actual experts!-Great new dad gift that’ll keep him calm, cool, and collected-Paperback; 5.5 x 7.75 inches; 112 pagesEditorial Reviews“Step 1: Buy this book. Step 2: There is no second step.”—Farah Miller, editor Huffington Post Parents“If Vienna’s CTFD had been available four years ago, the money I could have saved on antacid and Grecian Formula would easily fund my daughter’s first year of college.”—Dave Engledow, author of World’s Best Father

Raising Worry-Free Girls: Helping Your Daughter Feel Braver, Stronger, and Smarter in an Anxious World


Sissy Goff - 2019
    For a variety of reasons, childhood anxiety rates are soaring, especially among girls. Today's parents need to know what contributes to anxiety and worry and how they can empower their daughters to overcome troubling emotions.In this immensely practical book, veteran counselor Sissy Goff shares how you can instill bravery and strength in your daughter. Addressing common age-specific issues, Goff gives you the tools to help you and your child understand why her brain is often working against her when she starts to worry, and what she can do to fight back. With your help, she will find the anchoring truth of God's strong, safe love for her and the confidence she needs to thrive.

What Your Explosive Child Is Trying to Tell You: Discovering the Pathway from Symptoms to Solutions


Douglas A. Riley - 2008
    Douglas Riley’s ear-to-the-ground insights will give much-needed help to desperate parents who have one overriding question: Why does my child act like this? This compassionate yet no-nonsense therapist explains that explosive behavior is the mere tip of the iceberg. Instead of using a one-size-fits-all strategy, Dr. Riley identifies the eleven most common causes of explosions and accordingly tailors his treatment strategies to address the underlying cause of the behavior. What Your Explosive Child Is Trying to Tell You is a lifeline for parents who are at their wits’ end. DR. DOUGLAS RILEY is a clinical psychologist whose practice focuses on children and adolescents who are explosive, oppositional, depressed, or have difficulties with concentration and learning. He is the author of The Defiant Child: A Parent’s Guide to Oppositional Defiant Disorder as well as The Depressed Child: A Parent’s Guide for Rescuing Kids.

Your Five-Year-Old: Sunny and Serene


Louise Bates Ames - 1979
    But what’s going on inside that five-year-old head? What stages of development does a child this age go through, and what should parents know that can help their five-year-old handle this impressionable year? Recognized authorities on child behavior and development, Drs. Ames and Ilg answer these and many other questions, offering both invaluable practical advice and enlightening psychological insights.  Included in this book: • Characteristics of age Five • The child and others • Discipline • Accomplishments and abilities • The child’s mind • School • The five-year-old party • Individuality • Stories from real life • Good books and toys for Fives • Books for parents  “Louise Bates Ames and her colleagues synthesize a lifetime of observation of children, consultation, and discussion with parents. These books will help parents to better understand their children and will guide them through the fascinating and sometimes trying experiences of modern parenthood.”—Donald J. Cohen, M.D., Director, Yale Child Study Center, Irving B. Harris Professor of Child Psychiatry, Pediatrics, and Psychology, Yale School of Medicine

7 Secrets of the Newborn: Secrets and (Happy) Surprises of the First Year


Robert C. Hamilton - 2018
    Hamilton, M.D., has spent more than three decades caring for newborns. In his practice, Dr. Bob has seen it all--what works, what doesn't. How can you get your baby to nurse, sleep, and maybe even cease crying? What strategies can help you connect and communicate with your infant? What important decisions will you make during the first year for your child, yourself, and your partner? Here, Dr. Bob shares his clear, sensible, warm advice--as well as all the latest scientific data and research--on how to:- Offer comfort to a crying newborn using the "Hold"- Gently teach your baby how to sleep (and get some sleep yourself)- Establish healthy patterns- Breastfeed, formula-feed, or bottle-feed using either- Play!- Manage screen time in your home- And more to help you navigate the unforgettable first year of your child's life.

The Winter of Our Disconnect


Susan Maushart - 2010
    But it will also challenge you to take stock of your own family connections, to create a media ecology that encourages kids - and parents - to thrive.When journalist and commentator Susan Maushart first decided to pull the plug on all electronic media at home, she realised her children would have sooner volunteered to go without food, water or hair products. At ages 14, 15 and 18, her daughters and son didn’t use media. They inhabited media. Just exactly as fish inhabit a pond. Gracefully. Unblinkingly. And utterly without consciousness or curiosity as to how they got there. Susan’s experiment with her family was a major success and she found that having less to communicate with, her family is communicating more.At the simplest level, The Winter of Our Disconnect is the story of how one family survived six months of wandering through the desert, digitally speaking, and the lessons learned about themselves and technology along the way. At the same time, their story is a channel to a wider view - into the impact of new media on the lives of families, into the very heart of the meaning of home.

First, We Make the Beast Beautiful: A New Story About Anxiety


Sarah Wilson - 2017
    I bump along, in fits and starts, on a perpetual path to finding better ways for me and my mate, Anxiety, to get around. It's everything I do.Sarah Wilson—bestselling author and entrepreneur, intrepid solver of problems and investigator of how to live a better life—has helped over 1.2 million people across the world to quit sugar. She has also been an anxiety sufferer her whole life.In her new book, she directs her intense focus and fierce investigatory skills onto this lifetime companion of hers, looking at the triggers and treatments, the fashions and fads. She reads widely and interviews fellow sufferers, mental health experts, philosophers, and even the Dalai Lama, processing all she learns through the prism her own experiences.Sarah pulls at the thread of accepted definitions of anxiety, and unravels the notion that it is a difficult, dangerous disease that must be medicated into submission. Ultimately, she re-frames anxiety as a spiritual quest rather than a burdensome affliction, a state of yearning that will lead us closer to what really matters.Practical and poetic, wise and funny, this is a small book with a big heart. It will encourage the myriad sufferers of the world's most common mental illness to feel not just better about their condition, but delighted by the possibilities it offers for a richer, fuller life.

The Nurture Assumption: Why Children Turn Out the Way They Do


Judith Rich Harris - 1998
    This electrifying book explodes some of our unquestioned beliefs about children and parents and gives us a radically new view of childhood.Harris examines with a fresh eye the lives of real children to show that it is what they experience outside the home, in the company of their peers, that matters most. Parents don't socialize children; children socialize children. With eloquence and humor, Judith Harris explains why parents have little power to determine the sort of people their children will become. The Nurture Assumption brings together insights from psychology, sociology, anthropology, primatology, and evolutionary biology to offer a startling new view of who we are and how we got that way.

The Price of Privilege: How Parental Pressure and Material Advantage Are Creating a Generation of Disconnected and Unhappy Kids


Madeline Levine - 2006
    Materialism, pressure to achieve, perfectionism, and disconnection are combining to create a perfect storm that is devastating children of privilege and their parents alike.In this eye-opening, provocative, and essential book, clinical psychologist Madeline Levine explodes one child-rearing myth after another. With empathy and candor, she identifies toxic cultural influences and well-intentioned, but misguided, parenting practices that are detrimental to a child's healthy self-development. Her thoughtful, practical advice provides solutions that will enable parents to help their emotionally troubled "star" child cultivate an authentic sense of self.