Killed the Mad King and defeated the Demon Lord.Now that I'm mortal again, all I'd like to do is to brew some tasty ales and serve my regulars at the Tipsy Pelican Tavern.Most of all, I'd like to avoid any trouble involving the church or the nobility.That's not too much to ask right? ....Right?This light novel contains...- Fantasy & Action- An unconventional op mc- A unique magic system- Slice of life arcs- A beautiful cast- Loads of humor- Several pages of original art- A heartwarming moment or two

    Could any novel be ruder than IS HARRY ON THE BOAT? Possibly this sequel to that brilliantly funny cult novel about holiday reps in Ibiza.

    The way they go about it is a howl.

    But almost no one actually does...Well, Val Jolly feels like she's almost no one. Invisible to her husband and dissatisfied with her life, deep in her soul Val yearns to be someone else. Someone sexy. Someone happy.With only her favorite romance novel to guide her, Val decides Italy is the perfect place for some relaxation, romance and reinvention. But she soon finds out that handsome men, like life, have plans of their own.Will Val score a home run? Or will she just want to run home? In the race to rediscover herself, what awaits Val at the finish line may be a completely unexpected type of victory. That's up to you to decide.If you've ever dreamed of ditching your life and running off to Europe, now’s your chance! Join Val on a roller-coaster ride through Europe that will leave you gasping! From gut-busting hilarity to gut–wrenching gaffs, finding yourself again is always worth the price of admission. Get your ticket now!Absolute Zero is not a mystery per se. (Unless you count the mystery of why we do the crazy things we do!) It is a stand-alone novel, and the funny, yet often heart-wrenching prequel to the hilarious Val Fremden Mystery Series. Just like life, this satirical look at starting over after forty is full of ups and downs. It's told through the eyes of a sharp-witted, reluctantly redneck woman who’s always played it safe – until now. Freedom comes at a great price for Val. Will it be worth it in the end?Pick up a copy and come along for a tour of Italy, Germany and the human heart.Praise for Absolute Zero:“Loved it. Couldn’t stop, had to see what happened next.”“This character makes you proud to be a woman.”“Want a good laugh and a new friend? Grab this.”“Her characters are lovable and believable and you cheer, and cry, along with them.”“Wonderful book. Had me at the first paragraph.”

    Laugh out loud as they encounter ‘crocodiles’ on the wall, strange African customs and unintelligible Afrikaans accents. Cringe with them as their visiting in-laws embarrass them in front of their new SA friends.If you enjoyed Educating Rita and Shirley Valentine you will recognise Mavis Turner.Set in the 1970s, But Can You Drink The Water? uses subtle observational humour with an underlying pathos to portray the upsets, hurt and changing family dynamics that emigration brings. (The story is based on a 13-part sitcom) ReviewWith a droll, witty, utterly British voice, this manuscript tackles playfully and sincerely the age-old fish out of water tale. What sustains this book, however, is the narrative voice, the dry and self-deprecating humor, and the ability of this author to tell a story simply and well. Publisher’s Weekly reviewer for the ABNA semi-finals.

    

    So after hearing of her daughter-in-law's sudden death, Delilah decides that coming to the rescue of her long-estranged son, Jessie, and her granddaughter, Tamara, would be a good look.  .  .though Lord knows she'll have to dig hard to find her maternal instincts.But Delilah quickly discovers Jessie wants nothing to do with her. And Tamara, who's following in Delilah's musical footsteps, isn't interested in her career advice, especially since Delilah got ahead using the singing couch. And Delilah's old flame, Deacon Pillar, an ex-convict who's traded in his gangster ways for a Bible, is stirring up a past that's sure to shock..."Hilarious faith-based romp.  .  .Walker shines a little light on a wacky family reunion with her usual inspirational, knee-slapping style." --Publishers Weekly "A comic novel about mistakes and second chances." --Library Journal

    Full of acute observation, uncontrollable humour and a rousing climax.’ - Country Life ‘To his credit Stancomb resists the stereotype of the closed-minded British expatriate.’ - Independent on Sunday - Pick of the paperbacks ‘A thoroughly good read ---An endearing tale of a roller coaster ride.’ - Croatia Online ‘This is not a tale of your usual English couple. This is such a fantastic read ... both humorous and thought provoking.’ - Travellingbookjunkie ‘The author presents this quirky little tale in an honest way, even when he is on the receiving end of a joke. You don’t need to make a break with your past to enjoy this book. It is a fascinating, humorous and totally believable read.’ - Robin’s Reviews ‘A good read. I enjoyed best the humorous bits.’ Tony Rossiter (author of It’s Only a Bloody Game) ‘A good read.’ - Tariq Ali Notes From a Very Small Island is the follow-up to the bestselling ‘Under a Croatian Sun’, which tells the story of a couple upping sticks and leaving their humdrum life in London for blue skies and café life on an island in Croatia. In this second book, the couple continue their attempts to fit in with the village community, but it’s not always easy, and more often than not their endeavours involve them in in hilarious disasters. They also now try to start some projects up, but they have to battle with maddening ex-communist authorities and highly suspicious locals. However, through this, they get to see the crippling legacies that communism and the recent war have left in the lives of their new neighbours. Although largely a light hearted tale, the book is also a heartfelt insight into a community trying to adjust to being members of the EU and the ways of the Western World.

    In The Big Field, the baseball league championship is on the line, but just how far is reluctant second-baseman Hutch willing to bend to be a good teammate?

    And while it's not OK for someone else to make yo-momma jokes about your momma, it is perfectly healthy — even downright hilarious — to find the humor in your own upbringing. In fact, these writers highly recommend it. So if you think your mom is nuts, pull up a chair. You're in good company.

    Stein, Mad Scientist series!Franny K. Stein is not your average girl—she’s a mad scientist. She prefers poison ivy to daisies and piranha to goldfish, and when Franny jumps rope, she uses her pet snake. Being a mad scientist is exciting, but it does have its drawbacks. From fending off giant monstrous fiends to getting a lab assistant to battling her own teenage self, Franny has her hands full! Join her on her first four wacky, weird, creepy adventures and find out why Franny is everyone’s favorite mad scientist. This collection includes: Lunch Walks Among Us Attack of the 50-Ft. Cupid The Invisible Fran The Fran That Time Forgot

    

    He sleeps in a real bed and eats real food and only jumps into Neuroma to work. All he wanted was to log in, work and log out and live in general obscurity. Getting the attention of a CEO, meeting a stranger in real life, and forced to play in a secret game of corporations were not penciled into his calendar. While that was bad, he started to question whether Odditek was still in control, or had their complacency created the noose tightening around their neck. Bran was not yet aware of the choice before him. He could no longer stand back and watch, and he had to pick a side and fight before he lost the ability to choose. Would he recognize the inevitable in time? Was it possible to make a ‘correct’ choice, or had the lines blurred so much that hero and villain were indistinguishable? This novel is part of an Odditek series and is a LitRPG novel. I realize it’s the first Odditek series, but more are coming. This series started as a companion series to a book called Lantern Online. I wanted a way to build up the world as it now exists, and to explain what Odditek is. Neuroma and Nerves are mentioned in Lantern Online, and I felt all that information was taking away from my story and is mostly not relevant, but good to know information. I took a lot of it out and added it to this series. Anyway, out of that came Office Wars. I hope it's different than most LitRPG you will read, and brings another dimension to the genre. Explicit language! I will not lie, there is a satirical nature to this story, and a lot of the language and scenarios are morally questionable on purpose. In this story and I use a lot of curse words and controversial commentary. Just look on Facebook or any half a dozen social media sites, and you will see similar language, conversations, and other nonsense. If we all moved into a digital world, this is how I view that world.

    There was a terrible mistake-Wayside School was built with one classroom on top of another, thirty stories high! (The builder said he was sorry.) Maybe that's why all kinds of funny things happened at Wayside-especially on the thirteenth floor.

    This delightful little story tells of a young girl's time with her grandmother as she relates a legend of how a mischievous little white fox with all his grand adventures going over and under and through became the red fox we all know today.How the Fox got His Color may well become all-time children's classic and a perfect book for the young reader.