We were inundated with thousands of disgusterous entries! To discover our winners, we waded through burps, farts and rotten eggs; bogies, vile stew and goo to find the funniest and most revolting specimens. This eBook contains the crème de la phlegm-hand picked by children's author, songwriter and McFly frontman, Tom Fletcher, and Wales's Children's Poet Laureate, Anni Llyn.A huge thank you to our revolting partners Puffin Books, the National Literacy Trust, Literature Wales, Magic Light, and the Roald Dahl Museum and Story Centre for all their help and support!

    Seeing an elderly woman crushed to death under a baby grand piano is not the best start to anyone’s day, and Max Dempsey’s is about to get a whole lot worse.When sacked bank manager turned bank robber Max Dempsey (aka Simon Golightly) finds himself deep in debt to dodgy undertaker Danny Bishop, he’s prepared to do almost anything to pay it off and keep all of his fingers.But he’s likely to lose a lot more than his fingers when he agrees to do a “little job” for Danny and unintentionally crosses psychopathic Greek gangster, Nikos Spiropoulos.Meanwhile, Bernard Pemberton and his granddaughter Tess are on a road trip to scatter their beloved Dottie’s ashes on a Scottish hilltop, but is it really her ashes in the cremation urn or something else altogether?Cremains is a crime caper that twists and turns its way towards a conclusion that even Max himself couldn’t have predicted.

    He runsaway to an uninhabited island, falls in love, digs up treasureand saves an innocent man. Mark Twain’s timeless story of TomSawyer will take you through a journey of evolving friendships,budding romance and thrilling adventures.

    Sentences are short and so are words, each sentence is illustrated with a funny watercolor picture.This book is wonderful for bedtime reading, handy for travel, perfect for beginner readers.Scroll up and click “Look Inside” to get a preview or click “Buy Now” to add this children's book to your collection.I am sure you'll enjoy it!

    A fun way for children to learn about farm animals and the sounds they make! Old MacDonald (played by Vinko the Bear) is having a typical day on the farm: he feeds the chickens and collects their eggs as the hens “cluck-cluck;” he milks a cow as the other cows graze in the pasture and “moo-moo;” he shears the wool off a sheep as the other sheep envy the newly shorn sheep’s haircut and “baa-baa.” The only thing that’s different about this typical day on Old MacDonald’s farm is that young readers are clucking, mooing, baaing, and oinking as they sing the familiar song and learn about life on the farm and the sounds that farm animals make.

    and this book's fun-loving family is out to discover all the wonderful signs of the beautiful Fall season. Join in their antics as they shake and rhyme their way to a surprise ending that is sure to delight readers of all ages. There's even a couple of wisecracking squirrels to keep the laughs coming as the pair frolic through the pages telling jokes that will "leaf" you "fall"ing over into a great big pile of chuckles.

    Pack your bags and get ready to hit the road with this latest installment of family fun! You can help create car songs, spot some historical sights, even stop at a roadside diner--with a Mad Libs? twist, of course!Many have tried to imitate the world's most popular word game, but they just can't ___VERB___ the mustard! With Mad Libs? on the Road, traveling has never been so wacky!Book Details: Format: Paperback Publication Date: 6/7/1999 Pages: 48 Reading Level: Age 8 and Up

    A little boy has had enough of thunderstorms interfering with his life! He's done with being afraid and he's had enough of the "roars" in the sky ruining some of his favorite days!Determined to find out what's behind the roaring and get it to stop already, he sets off on a brave adventure.Who knew there were such interesting things in the clouds?!Pirates, firefighters and even dinosaurs quickly turn fear into one big-bellied-giggle after another!

    You may find it for free on the web. Purchase of the Kindle edition includes wireless delivery.

    This time there are no suave, wise-cracking good guys, no humorless, drug-addled bad guys. The story I want to tell you is all about how I learned to sleep at night, to close my eyes without seeing cold places and dead eyes… how I dragged whatever was left of me up out of the dark, finally. That’s the story I want to tell, because that’s the story I need to hear. I want to know how it ends..."Returning to normal life after his dark days in the depths of the Jianghu hasn't been easy for Randall Lee. With big changes coming in his future, though, Randall offers to help rehabilitate an injured friend, only to find that the need for healing goes far deeper than he ever expected. Bridging the events of Jianghu and the upcoming Randall Lee Mystery, The Art of War, Eating Bitter is a quiet story of resilience and perseverance, punctuated with Randall's trademark humor and self-deprecation.

    When Farts Had Colors is the story of 4th grader Lance Chance who hates Mondays. This particular Monday Lance's mom coaxes Lance to school with his favorite sandwiches and a 'wish-kiss'. On his way to school Lance is tormented by "the biggest, meanest 4th grader ever to stalk the halls of Alfonso Orr Elementary School. Merry Maddox. Bully Extraordinaire…”A legend" and her posse of mayhem, the Crazy M&Ms. If having to hand over his sandwiches and perform a certain humiliating act wasn't enough, Lance gets blamed by Merry Maddox for letting out a fart so horrible it forces the entire school to evacuate. Lance runs away from school and wishes that farts had colors. "Then everyone would have known it was Merry Maddox who sent out those heat seeking missiles of doom and destruction," thinks Lance. And just like that, Lance's wish comes true. Will Lance come up with a plan to expose Merry Maddox and reveal her true colors?

    I knew that if I wanted to make it to the end of the week alive, I would have to avoid upsetting Grandpa as much as possible. No singing, no playful nips, no jaunty bell.”Bird and Grandpa stay home in Massachusetts while Mother, Father, Joseph and Maya head south for a winter holiday. When Grandpa determines to set tropical Bird free in freezing February, Bird must use every bit of bird brain power to outsmart him.• Will Bird become a parrot popsicle?• What’s in the creepy second bedroom where no one ever goes?• Do Grandpa and Bird play Dig a Hole to China and Send Birdie on a Trip?In the spirit of Tom and Jerry, Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fudd, and Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote, here come Bird and Grandpa in the hilarious first short story in the Grandpa Hates the Bird series!

    But How?The farm animals watch as he scampers across the barnyard. But look out for the cat! Can our little friend make it all the way to the house?Join along in the fun, and find out how that mouse got in our house!

    Stein, Mad Scientist series!Franny K. Stein is not your average girl—she’s a mad scientist. She prefers poison ivy to daisies and piranha to goldfish, and when Franny jumps rope, she uses her pet snake. Being a mad scientist is exciting, but it does have its drawbacks. From fending off giant monstrous fiends to getting a lab assistant to battling her own teenage self, Franny has her hands full! Join her on her first four wacky, weird, creepy adventures and find out why Franny is everyone’s favorite mad scientist. This collection includes: Lunch Walks Among Us Attack of the 50-Ft. Cupid The Invisible Fran The Fran That Time Forgot

    (The first book, 'Mrs Caldicot's Cabbage War was filmed starring Pauline Collins in the title role.) Mrs Caldicot and her colleagues from the Twilight Years Rest Home win the lottery. Their win is small but it transforms their lives in an unexpected way. A trip abroad results in disaster but Mrs Caldicot and company rise above their misfortune.