Damn, now I sound stupid, too." -Bomani Jones, ESPN "It's great, and I have no idea what just happened, but Jerry Jones dick exploded and that's enough for me." -Spencer Hall, SB Nation "The only parody Twitter account worth following" -Deadspin.com "This is the least influential book of anything I've ever read. I hated it." -Adolf Hitler In what is being hailed by many, probably, as the best, funniest, most gut-shittingly poignant literary work since The New Testament, PFT Commenter takes you on a realistic-fiction journey through the backdoor politics of today's NFL. Set in the 2014 offseason, Roger Goodell and President Barack Obama become locked in a mano a mano battle over the future of the Dallas Cowboys, culminating in a literal fight to the death. Starring NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, Barack Obama, Mike Ditka, Joe Biden, Michael Vick, Peter King, Ron Jaworski, Dan Snyder, Robert Griffin III, Danny Woodhead, J.J. Watt, Jerry Jones, Russell Wilson, Pete Carroll, and many more of your favorite NFL stars and media personalities; "Goodell vs. Obama: The Battle for the Future of the NFL" will take you on a journey that any NFL fan is sure to love, or at least not hate. WARNING: Told through the narrative eye and screaming mouth of an uneducated internet commenter, this book is filled with grammatical errors. It was written by a someone who was raised on scorching hot sports takes, light beer, and an undying love for Roger Goodell. He cares about TELLING, not about spelling. If that's going to be a problem,, there's the door.

    When he accepted the hit, Russ would not have believed whose interests he was actually serving. Now, with the job done, an otherworldly being is giving him with one hand what was just taken from him with the other. His life. Skills are everything and what doesn't kill you makes your skills stronger. Placed into the world of skills, Russ found himself faced with a new life governed by a system he did not completely understand. It is, however, a completely new start. Will Russ continue doing what he does best? Or will he be able to achieve the things that he had always wanted but considered to be a lost cause in his old life? Why not some of both? This is a litrpg story where the main character acquires skills and levels them up by using them. He gets ability choices as he levels up and as a reader you will be going through the choices with him, in most cases.

    It is illustrated with intricate sigils.

    Brown. Brown is the winner of the Texas Book of The Year Prize, 2013. The New York Times calls his work a rekindling of the faith in the shocking, weird and beautiful power of words. Brown finally sold the ship, The Sea Section, upon which he lived for years in the Long Beach harbor, after which he took to hunting for a city that was affordable and had a bustling writer s community. He landed in Austin, Texas and when the progress of that town got to be intense, he moved to the nearby countryside in Elgin, Texas, and from that pastoral setting came unfurling this new collection of his most personal work to date. Brown has been known as one of the most touring, well travelled living poets in America. He has based his whole writing career on changing peoples minds about poetry and he feels a quality, unforgettable live experience can achieve that. Brown told himself he needed a 10-year hiatus from writing poetry when he felt the well of creativity had dried up. 2 years ago, he wrote a one-hour long poetic play called Strange Light, commissioned by The Noord Nederlands Dans Group in Holland. The piece was performed by 14 dancers and accompanied by a live orchestra using music composed by fellow Americans, Emily Wells and Timmy Straw. While he was working on a new libretto for Wayne State University in Detroit, he was set up in a seemingly pastoral country setting, where, as Brown says, an incredible war broke out inside and out, such bright, massive storms, snakes, guns, howling wind, hard sun: all kinds of poems gushed forth. I gave in to the process and my best work to date was born, this will be my 5th book. Our Poison Horse touches on more autobiography than the romantic and fantastical that was so present in his past work. In Derrick Brown s words: I found a poetry in the real events that shaped or broke me. Every morning, I would quiet down, stare out into the field where we were watching our neighbors horse, a horse that was poisoned with pesticide by some local boys, a horse with massive scars all down its body from it s skin peeling from the poison sprayed upon it maliciously by some bastard kids. I watched the horse heal and finally come to me, and trust me and eat carrots. Something about that horse, Lacey, about it not trusting me and then warming up pulled something out of me that I didn t know I was ready for. There is a theme that in beautiful places, you will"

    It's nothing like the suburb you might live in . . . Unless, that is, an insane, Listerine-guzzling Realtor sold you your house? Or perhaps your postman happens to have a disturbing relationship with his claw hammer? A grieving Dan LaBarbara knows something is different in Helltown as soon as he comes back home. Yeah, sure, the town always been a little off. You can feel that about the place, like if you stepped into a house whose only occupants were freshly murdered corpses in an upstairs bedroom. But this is something else entirely. Standing in his little brother Barbie's basement workshop, holding one of those dioramas Barbie's been building since the accident, the ones that seem to move when you hold them, Dan can feel Barbie's terror. Barbie must know something is coming, something big, something evil. He's trying to warn Dan in the only way he knows. Why else would Barbie build a diorama depicting a man-sized version of a cartoon rabbit with bloody teeth about to devour a trembling teenager? Why else would he spend so much time crafting an intricate model of Death standing over a pimply teenager in the school library? And let's not even talk about that little model of the mob of undead surrounding the massive tower of vicious black spines behind the high school. Hilltown has a story to tell, and the lonely brain-damaged man who builds magical dioramas in his basement workshop has been telling it all along. As the evil closes in around them, Dan and his new love interest Jessica must do the impossible: save everyone one in Hilltown before it's too late.

    One night when Zoe's cousin invites her out to stop moping, live a little, and have some fun; fate steps in with both feet and offers up a remedy. West Jameson is a typical ladies man, who is out for a good time, has no clue what it means to be in a relationship or in love. But one memorable one night stand, for both good and bad reasons, sends Zoe and West down a spiraling path neither one of them has anticipated. Take this journey with these two as they discover that love isn't always easy but it's worth it. Chances are never given, they're taken...& sometimes love happens purely...By Chance

    Do reputations never change?Some people aren't always forever...Taking chances may be reckless, but the prizes can be great. Is love always enough or will the heady temptations of fame prove too much?I don't think I've read anything so gut-wrenching and amazing before' - ReviewerNo Cheating, HEA seriesScroll up and grab it now.

    And so when she meets and falls in love with Daniel Fallow, son of a successful businessman, she's quick to accept his proposal of his marriage. His family, though, are against the match, and so the young couple marry in secret. Grudging acceptance follows, and as the Depression worsens Daniel is persuaded to join the family business, unaware of his father's dodgy dealings. Tragedy is just around the corner, and worse is to come when war is declared in 1939: as Daniel leaves to fight and her children are evacuated, Hope wonders if she will ever have all her family around her again...

    The relationship is perfect from the outside looking in, but what happens when secrets come to light and ends their future? Kenji decides seven years is a long time for things to just end; however, after hearing some of the vile actions his ex committed, he can no longer salvage anything. Sadly, like most ex’s, Robin is in denial and refuses to let any woman take him from her. Nyana Simpson has gone through a lot in her youth, but she made it. As an adult, she’s living her life carefree, and nothing can bring her down. She has a job, and her own place but the loneliness creeps in making her feel as if no one can love her. She comes in contact with a man who couldn’t possibly desire her, the same way she desires him. What happens when one family member brings them together, and another is desperately trying to keep them apart? Sade is living in a nightmare she can’t wake up from. With no help in sight, she decides to transfer her job and start over. Unfortunately, the nightmare follows her, and things go from bad to worse. Somehow, her knight and shining armor appears, but can he save her when he’s dealing with his own nightmare? Sade has to do something to save her life, but what happens when her life is no longer her own and the person responsible decides to show her there’s no way out?

    Summer's last hurrah. For nine-year-old Eddie Gilmarten and his mother, who have fled to his aunt's home in the Shawnee Hills of Southern Illinois, Aunt Gene's isolated rural property is the perfect place to escape an alcoholic father. There are caves to explore and sprawling wooded hills to play upon, but all is not fine in this idyllic country setting. Eddie and his Ma aren't the only souls who have sought sanctuary on his aunt's sprawling property, although they might be the only innocents who have done so. There is a dark entity at large, one that might or might not be a figment of Eddie's fertile imagination, and a man of secrets with a twisted mind and a terrible appetite for innocence. Yet, even in the midst of pain there is hope, and valor may sometimes be found in the hearts of the wicked. For Frank O'Keefe-- the bank robber known as "the Fox"-- Eddie and his mother might not just be his only chance for survival... They might also be the only chance for his soul's redemption. Indian Summer is the latest novel by the indie best selling author of The Oldest Living Vampire Tells All and Mort. This novel contains adult situations, language and violence. It may not be suitable for younger readers. Approx. 80,000 words. Released June 2011 by Cobra Ebooks.

    After being fired from his job as the clandestine stooge on hit TV show Ghostbusters UK, Elliott returns home to find his girlfriend missing. To make matters worse, Hapkido Valentine, the legendary 1980s wrestler, has returned from the dead and taken up residency in Elliott’s flat. Despite a voracious appetite for sausage sandwiches, Hapkido is convinced he has finally become the mystical Japanese warrior he once portrayed in the ring.Together they must undertake a dangerous journey to find out why the Universe created this most unlikely of partnerships. All that stands in their way is a medallion wearing TV psychic, a train-spotting assassin and the murderous intentions of the local over 75’s women’s group. If Elliott thought the day started badly, things are about to get a whole lot worse.

    Inevitably, as they set off on the journey back to Nottingham the lawmen's disgust at the captive's crime colours their opinion of him and Little John has to be restrained from brutally assaulting the man. The harsh winter conditions slow their progress though, and eventually the prisoner's protestations and desperate violent actions have the lawmen questioning what's really been happening in Stapleford...Can Robin and John complete the mission they've been given, or will their own innate sense of justice lead them down an unexpected path?Fans of the bestselling Forest Lord series will love this exciting new stand-alone tale, set just before Blood of the Wolf, that explores the themes of morality and justice in medieval England.

    Thus CHACHA CHAUDHARY was born in 1971.Tall and robust SABU, who is an inhabitant of planet Jupiter, gave Chaudhary an ideal company. A combination of wisdom and strength was formed to tackle any difficult task. It is said that " Chacha Chaudhary's brain works faster than a computer". Though both fight the criminals and tricksters, each episode ends with a touch of humour. The duo perform in lighter vein. The CHAUDHARY family consists of his wife Bini, a fat sharp tongue woman, Sabu, Rocket - the dog and Dag- Dag, an old truck who is half human- half machine. Chacha Chaudhary is the most popular Indian comics. More than 10 million readers enjoy this series regularly in newspapers and comic books in ten languages. A T.V. serial based on the comics has crossed 500 episodes and still continue to be telecast on premier channel "Sahara ONE".

    Apart from this, many a times each state of each nation has role models from the past but not forgotten history. Maharashtra has its own idols. The greatest and most loved of them all is shivaji maharaj.

    But when a skirmish with pirates grows into something more, he finds himself caught up in a series of escalating events that lead him into the mighty Aggadeh Empire, pursued by a murderous pirate hellbent on revenge and possibly connected to the nobility of the empire, joined by two companions of dubious trustworthiness, and a young dragon focused on obtaining the mindstone in Nem's possession.