The brilliantly funny cult novel about holiday reps in Ibiza.

    He’s in Goa, dreaming of the passport-thief who stole his heart (and his passport) forty-six years ago. Back then, fate kept bringing them together, but lately it seems to have given up.Jan has not. In his long search he has accidentally held a whole town at imaginary gunpoint in Soviet Russia, stalked the proprietors of an international illegal lamp-trafficking scam and done his very best to avoid any kind of work involving the packing of fish. Now he thinks if he just waits, if he just does nothing at all, maybe fate will find it easier to reunite them.His story spans fifty-four years, ten countries, two imperfect criminals (and one rather perfect one), twenty-two different animals and an annoying teenager who just…His story spans fifty-four years, ten countries, two imperfect criminals (and one rather perfect one), twenty-two different animals and an annoying teenager who just…Will…Not…Leave.But maybe an annoying teenager is exactly what Jan needs to help him find the missing thief?Featuring a menagerie of creatures, each with its own story to tell, We Are Animals is a quirky, heart-warming tale of lost love, unlikely friendships and the certainty of fate (or lack thereof). For the first time in her life the cow noticed the sun setting, and it was glorious.

    Mattie Sylvester, a widow of one of America's most celebrated painters, reveals the sordid truth of the past, and of her husband, to her secretary.

    Of course, no plan survives contact with the enemy, and Alan soon discovers he has far more enemies than he was expecting – aside from vicious pets, difficult owners, surly farmers, and children from hell, he finds himself working with an unhinged and jealous surgeon who makes it his personal mission ruin Alan's life. Battling long hours, life and death decisions, tragic cases, a complaint from the Royal College of Veterinary Surgeons and an unexpected love triangle, Alan’s hopes of saving the world are quickly replaced with a simple question: Can he even last a year in practice? Once Bitten… is the story of a young vet’s first few months in practice, and how they changed his life forever.

     The trade paperback edition of David Bowman's prize-winning first novel, Let the Dog Drive, has developed a cult following. Now Bowman's exuberantly praised second novel -- a hard-boiled comedy about love, abduction, and child care, set in a future where electricity has disappeared and fertility is on the wane, but human passions are as messy as ever -- is also in trade paperback.

    Her escape is achieved just before the disastrous advent of Hitler, and there is further tragedy to come.Follow her through childhood and adolescence, then on into her twenties when, finally made whole, she wins her own battle for freedom, for love and for her own place in the world.

    Born at the end of the nineteenth century in a slum district of Manchester, he's blessed with a loving, hard-working mam and dad, but they don't have two ha'pennies to rub together. In addition to suffering poverty, the family is struck by tragedy not once but twice. But Tommy is a survivor. At school he quickly makes lots of friends, and together they plot money-making schemes, settle scores and play lots of football. Then, at last, it's time to leave the playground behind. Denied the chance of a promising career as an engineer, Tommy instead finds employment at Manchester's Smithfield market and works his way up, finally becoming a porter. He's turning into a man, and amongst the young women who catch his eye is Kate Lally, who may just be the love of his life...

    Deputy Marshal in Kansas for a great deal of his life. As soon as his brother Tommy stops answering his letters, he gets extremely alarmed and decides to take matters into his own hands. When he puts a plan in place to travel to Texas, little does he know that a shattering surprise awaits him there; his brother has been found dead, next to the body of one of the most powerful ranchers in town. Will Lee manage to unravel the truth behind these enigmatic and shocking deaths?While Lee is still aghast, the local sheriff declares Tommy's death a suicide, and also accuses him of attempting robbery and murder. On the spur of the moment, the case is considered closed, which makes Lee highly suspicious. Feeling that they drag Tommy's name through the mud, he decides to defy the law and seek vindication. Will he succeed in this lonesome yet risky mission? How will he solve this demanding riddle and clear his brother's name?Lee's hazardous quest begins, having Susan Marsh and Ki'Somma, a young Cherokee medicine man, on his side. Doubts, lies, deceits, serious injuries as well as many other roadblocks will derange their endless undertaking. Will they manage to join forces triumphantly and complete this challenging mission? Or will Tommy always be remembered as a ruthless criminal?

    

    In a bid for freedom a lone spaceship hurtled through space before crashing in the hills outside a small village in Spain. On Christmas Day a strong, silent man with blank eyes entered Bar Noche Azul. Only a 13-year-old boy could have guessed that there was any connection between the two.

    Many years later, a couple sailing around the world take refuge on an uncharted island. Although they believe the tiny atoll to be uninhabited, it is actually home to a mysterious woman who has been stranded there for more than forty years. As that woman ponders whether to stay hidden or step back into society, a tempestuous storm threatens to change the course of all their lives.

    Charles Goodwin, the garden committee president, would like the garden to stay just the way it is. Lord Vernon of Barnstable, the appalling life peer, has plans for the garden. Bryony Mullins, the gusset-mouthed harridan, doesn't give a flying knicker elastic what happens to the garden as long as it's not what Vernon wants. Angel Tenby, the sexually organic gardener, wants the garden to run free. Mrs Kotzen, the neighbour, wants the garden to be chic. The vicar wants the garden to be accessible and relevant. Lily Ng, the teenage daily, would probably think the garden silly if she thought about it at all; she wants to offer sex in lieu of ironing. Mona Corinth, the Hollywood legend, is dead and may be about to become part of the garden. Iona Wallace is the obligatory love interest. She would like to be a garden: laid, forked, plucked, seeded, mulched, vigorously pollarded, bedded and admired for her natural beauty. The garden wants absolutely nothing at all.Sap Rising may well be a story about dark dank nature both human and vegetable and our uneasy relationship with the mystic natural forces that move the earth. It may be a parable on the fragile consensus that maintains and tends green England. On the other hand, it might just be a farcical love story set in a garden about nothing of any consequence performed by comic grotesques with a lot of swearing and unnatural sex.

    Yes, she’s thirty-three, single, and has had to work as a waitress and children’s party entertainer since her social worker salary suffered from budget cuts, but she stays positive and manages to pay the mortgage on her flat. Her home is her sanctuary – until Tom moves in downstairs. Lucy and Tom quickly fall in love and into a serious relationship, which is complicated by Tom’s recent separation from his wife, who he has two young sons with. Lucy is heartbroken when Tom breaks up with her, saying that something has to give in his busy life. Encouraged/coerced/badgered by her friends into getting ‘back on that horse’, Lucy finds herself at a tacky Singles Night; dating Danny, a Justin Timberlake impersonator; and attempting a rendezvous with her ‘special friend’. Lucy’s quest to move on from Tom would be a whole lot easier if she didn’t have to hear everything he does. After all, how on earth do you get over someone when you can hear them peeing? Him Downstairs is relatable Chick Lit for readers 18+ who have dipped their toe into the world of modern dating and relationships. It contains adult language and humour, and is written in ‘British English’.

    Not being happy all the time makes them stressed out of their tights. Carol practises uninhibited sex which ends with her panty liner stuck to the bottom of someone's shoe. Donnie, after a mystery bite in a third world country, thinks he's incubating a nest of spiders up his bum. Daphne gets fat. She makes soup all the time and wonders if Woolworth's sell a hose pipe to fit a Vauxhall Vectra. Pierce is a poet; a fat balding womaniser who's only steady relationship is with a cup at the sperm bank. He's the only one not on anti-depressants, and he's the hero.

    When his assistant shows up unannounced and tells him to get his head back in the game, she has no idea how her presence, and his mounting attraction to her, affects him—in the most terrifying and scintillating way.