This book is written by a stand-up comedian that takes you through tragedy after tragedy on its path to hilarity. Will it make you laugh? Eventually. Will it make you cry? Probably. But the hope is that it will also make you smile, dream, and reflect, while simultaneously inspiring you to never stop chasing your dreams (even if your very own family is constantly trying to derail them). Brandt tells his life story with candor, detailing the many pit stops, wrong turns, crazy connections, and lucky breaks he experienced along the way to his comedy career, all while trying to balance a toxic relationship with his jailbird dad. Brandt's storytelling will make you laugh (it better because that's his job!) and believe, as he does, that when it comes to defining family, blood isn't always thicker than water.

    Meet Karl (the Joker), Boris (the Gladiator), Miss Winnifred Hardbottle, Buddy (the Little Whittler) and many more.

    

    

    Inside, you'll find hundreds of jokes that are guaranteed to stir up a room full of smiles, including knock-knocks, witty puns, and one-liners. Complete with hilarious quotes from celebrities like Jon Stewart, Lewis Black, and Jerry Seinfeld, everyone will revel in each gut-busting moment.So whether you're looking to add a few jokes to your repertoire, impress your buds, or improve your banter, this sidesplitting book arms you with the perfect joke for any occasion!

    She’s bored. Bored with her safe monotonous job; bored with her cautious loneliness. Thanks to an unexpected financial windfall, Cynthia opts for early retirement at fifty, hoping to find a new passion. Soon, she thinks she’s found it – in the form of a failing boutique abandoned by its mysterious owner. And the shop is not the only thing the proprietor has deserted. There’s a very nice husband left behind as well. It’s perfect. Until Cynthia meets Shannon Miller. Shannon is fourteen, a tough and defiant casualty of the foster care system. And she’s pregnant. Irresistibly drawn to this foul-mouthed, sarcastic, but vulnerable teenager, Cynthia rediscovers long-buried memories.Suddenly the store seems unimportant. And hoping she can explain to the new man in her life – eventually, anyway – Cynthia takes the leap. She offers Shannon a deal. With strings attached.If they both get what they want, does it matter that their scheme is just slightly illegal?

    Most of all, it’s about the difficulties of staying on the planet when it’s spinning out of control.While taking a humorous look at health, grandparenthood, computers, and social issues, How to Succeed… answers such pressing questions as: What brand of yogurt guarantees you will live to 110? Can older people really shop online, or is the "submit order" button visible only to users under 30? And how many pixels does it take to win your grandchild’s affection?As we get older, we can whine or complain about our losses--memory, muscles, and mobility--or we can roll with the paunches. This book rolls.

    In her critically acclaimed memoir Dork Whore, Iris Bahr finally lost her virginity in the summer between high school and Brown University. In this book, she’s ready for love a year later—but not much wiser. Through all of her uproarious capers, she tries to reconcile her craving for mindblowing sex with her desire for a meaningful relationship—all in an attempt to become an adult. Sort of.

    Every woman needs game. Take Oprah, Jada Pinkett-Smith, and Beyoncé Knowles. All three of these women have the one intangible quality that every mack, male or female, must possess: they all have game. In other words, they have intelligence, hustle, and common sense that they apply to every aspect of their lives -- especially in their relationships. Play or Be Played is an instruction manual for women who are tired of being played by men and who want to be players themselves. Though women may not want to play games, the truth is men often do. So women who hope to win in the game of love must first learn the rules. Bestselling author and true mack, Tariq "K-Flex" Nasheed shares: -ways to spot a scrub -what it takes to get with a baller -why men cheat -how men really judge women -the top three mistakes women make in relationships

     Chess is one of the world’s most popular board games, and is played by millions of people from all walks of life in parks, homes, online and tournaments. This two-player game is played on a checkered board with 64 squares arranged in an eight by eight grid called a chessboard. The game begins with each player possessing 16 pieces, 8 pawns, two rooks (sometimes called castles), two bishops, two knights, a queen and a king. The different player’s pieces are colored differently and are usually either black or white, though colors may vary. Regardless of the color variation though, each ‘team’ is referred to as either black or white. The objective of the game is to ‘checkmate’ the opponent’s king by placing it in such a position that it cannot escape capture. There are other methods to winning the game, such as when an opponent forfeits or resigns from the match. Forfeitures are normally as a result of the opponent losing too many pieces, or if a checkmate is seen as inevitable. There are also circumstances where the game ends in a draw for various reasons, meaning that neither player wins. The first official world chess championship was held in 1886 between Wilhelm Steinitz and Johannes Zukerfort. The victor and thus the first official World Champion was Wilhelm Seinitz. Since the creation of the World Chess Federation in Paris in 1924, the best chess players in the world have been awarded the title of Grandmaster, which is the highest accolade a chess player can get apart from world champion. The latter half of the 20th century saw computers being programmed to play chess, with many home computers now being able to play with such a high level of sophistication that they can outwit some of the best human players. The first computer to ever beat a reigning world champion was the computer Deep Blue, which beat Garry Kasparov in a match in 1997. What You're Going to Learn: Origins and History of Chess Rules and Notations Movements in the Game The Pieces, Their Movements and Values Chess Strategy and Tactics Tips for Beginners What Not to Do More Tactics ...And Much More! Ready to Play Like a Pro ? * * * DOWNLOAD YOUR COPY TODAY * * *

     This book will start you on your journey to stop enabling. If you just can’t maintain boundaries with your adult child/children, and you find yourself constantly taken advantage of, then this book is for you. Discover the wealth of shared experience that can exist in a parent/adult child relationship that is not dominated by unrealistic expectations, manipulations and resentment. The goal is to empower you, as you understand the enabling cycle and then learn some very practical tools to help you stop. The enabling cycle can be challenged, and change will happen. Getting your power back in your life, and feeling the freedom of being in control of your decisions is an amazingly freeing process. It does however take work, and that is where this very practical book can get you started. You may find that your needs are constantly disregarded, while your adult child expects you to continually be there to pick up the pieces and rescue them again and again. It is time to learn HOW TO put firm boundaries in place in a calm and dignified manner. This book will help you see what lies are keeping you in your current stressful and unfulfilled situation. You will learn how to start the journey towards sharing a mutually fulfilling mature relationship with your adult child. Here Is A Preview Of What You'll Learn Understanding the Enabler or Rescuer How the Enabling Cycle Continues and Grows Boundaries Are Your Friend! Dignified Assertiveness The Importance of Individuation It’s Not Cruel To Say ‘No’! Changing Your Thinking (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) Practical Steps For Putting Your New Thinking and Boundaries Into Action Take action right away to start your empowering journey today by downloading this book, "How To Stop Enabling Your Adult Children", for a limited time discount of only $0.99! Tags: enabling adult children, rescuing, relationships, parenting, boundaries, enabling, individuation, cognitive behavioural therapy, CBT, self-talk, healthy boundaries

    And how do you do that? By learning to Push in the Orangetheory Fitness workout. By doing so, you also learn to do the same in your life - to take on new challenges, to pursue your biggest goals, and to become the best version of you.What makes Orangetheory different from every workout you’ve tried? Why is it one of the fastest-growing fitness franchises today? And how can it change your life? In Push, you’ll learn the amazing story behind Orangetheory, the journey Ellen Latham took to create it, and how to apply the elements of Base, Push, and All Out from the workout studio to your own life.

    An honest look at how children can drive the most loving parent to periodic madness, along with practical suggestions for how to cope.--Adele Faber.

    Sex has become just sex. But while society has taken sex too far, the church hasn't taken it far enough.God wants couples to make love in marriage-with passion, with purpose, and with pleasure. Marriages aren't experiencing all the benefits that come from a healthy sex life. Couples are facing a barrage of influences that keep them from connecting with each other regularly-the kids, the career, the house, the errands, etc.SEXPERIMENT shows people that sex in marriage is more than just sex, and it's more than a chore. The Youngs believe it's time to get back to understanding the context of sex in marriage and that it's time for couples to break the barriers keeping them from a healthy sexual relationship. Couples ought to experience the benefits of having sex regularly, intentionally, and creatively. SEXPERIMENT will allow couples to discover that the intersection of God and sex can lead to a life punctuated by exclamation marks!

    Psychologist Dennis Ortman likens the psychological aftermath of sexual betrayal to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in its origin and symptoms, including anxiety, irritability, rage, emotional numbing, and flashbacks. Using PTSD treatment as a model, Dr. Ortman will show you, step by step, how to: • work through conflicting emotions• Understand yourself and your partner• Make important life decisions  Dr. Ortman sees recovery as a spiritual journey and draws on the wisdom of diverse faiths, from Christianity to Buddhism. He also offers exercises to deepen recovery,  such as guided meditations and journaling, and explores heart-wrenchingly familiar case studies of couples struggling with monogamy. By the end of this book, you will have completed the six stages of healing and emerged with a whole heart, a full spirit, and the freedom to love again.