Live well, laugh often, love much and share God's blessings. We all know that laughter is the best medicine, and this is true, Laughter is a powerful antidote to stress, pain, and conflict. Nothing works faster or more dependably to bring your mind and body back into balance than a good laugh. Humor lightens your burdens, inspires hopes, connects you to others, and keeps you grounded, focused, and alert. Read our collection of jokes and funny short stories. These jokes and funny stories are collected from different sources in the Internet. Download our book now, and laugh out those stress away. Please note that this book is categorized under Jokes for Adults and may contain some offensive jokes and stories, and it is your discretion as a customer whether to share the jokes and stories with others.

    These 30 short chapters each deal with a particular programming problem drawn from sources as diverse as games and puzzles, intriguing combinatorial tasks, and more familiar areas such as data compression and string matching. Each pearl starts with the statement of the problem expressed using the functional programming language Haskell, a powerful yet succinct language for capturing algorithmic ideas clearly and simply. The novel aspect of the book is that each solution is calculated from an initial formulation of the problem in Haskell by appealing to the laws of functional programming. Pearls of Functional Algorithm Design will appeal to the aspiring functional programmer, students and teachers interested in the principles of algorithm design, and anyone seeking to master the techniques of reasoning about programs in an equational style.

    In this book, you'll learn how to become an entrepreneur, driving your career in the direction of your choosing. You'll learn how to build your software development career step by step, following the same path that you would follow if you were building, marketing, and selling a product. After all, your skills themselves are a product. The choices you make about which technologies to focus on and which business domains to master have at least as much impact on your success as your technical knowledge itself--don't let those choices be accidental. We'll walk through all aspects of the decision-making process, so you can ensure that you're investing your time and energy in the right areas. You'll develop a structured plan for keeping your mind engaged and your skills fresh. You'll learn how to assess your skills in terms of where they fit on the value chain, driving you away from commodity skills and toward those that are in high demand. Through a mix of high-level, thought-provoking essays and tactical "Act on It" sections, you will come away with concrete plans you can put into action immediately. You'll also get a chance to read the perspectives of several highly successful members of our industry from a variety of career paths. As with any product or service, if nobody knows what you're selling, nobody will buy. We'll walk through the often-neglected world of marketing, and you'll create a plan to market yourself both inside your company and to the industry in general. Above all, you'll see how you can set the direction of your career, leading to a more fulfilling and remarkable professional life.

    Completely Revised for the New 2007 Version of the CCNA Exam (#640-802) Cisco networking authority Todd Lammle has completely updated this new edition to cover all of the exam objectives for the latest version of the CCNA exam.

    Fully updated for Windows Server® 2008 and Windows Vista®, this classic guide delivers key architectural insights on system design, debugging, performance, and support—along with hands-on experiments to experience Windows internal behavior firsthand. Delve inside Windows architecture and internals: Understand how the core system and management mechanisms work—from the object manager to services to the registry Explore internal system data structures using tools like the kernel debugger Grasp the scheduler's priority and CPU placement algorithms Go inside the Windows security model to see how it authorizes access to data Understand how Windows manages physical and virtual memory Tour the Windows networking stack from top to bottom—including APIs, protocol drivers, and network adapter drivers Troubleshoot file-system access problems and system boot problems Learn how to analyze crashes

    Whether they're landscape or portrait photographers, illustrators or fine artists, masking and compositing are essential skills to master for combining images to the extent that it is impossible to tell where one image stops and the other one begins. Photoshop artist and educator Katrin Eismann takes readers through numerous step-by-step examples, highlighting the tools and techniques used for masking and combining images. Featuring work by leading artists and photographers, this book focuses on the techniques used to create compelling compositions, including making fast and accurate selections, mastering Photoshop's masking tools, and implementing the concept and photography from start to finish. The book addresses working with Photoshop's selection tools; selecting and maintaining fine details and edges; working with difficult image elements, such as cloth, hair, or translucent objects; and green-screen techniques. Katrin also addresses the creative aspects of image compositing, including how to start with a concept, plan and execute the photography, and seamlessly assemble the image. Combining technical direction and inspiration, this book will expand readers' imaginations, so they can fluidly and professionally create images with Photoshop.

    Lord help her… NOTE: This volume contains the first three books of the Jessica Christ series, including ... Book 1: The BeginningBook 2: And It Was GoodBook 3: It's a Miracle!*Plus* the first chapter of Book 4: Nu Alpha Omega The Beginning Jessica McCloud knows first-hand that it’s tough to fit in when you’re God’s only begotten daughter. While she has the power to smite, and she’s privy to most of the juicy gossip in her West Texas town, nobody is knocking on her door with frankincense and myrrh. The Messiah-in-the-making still has to contend with algebra tests, her first crush, and menstrual cramps with the power to spark lightning storms…As if dealing with her overbearing Father and a scheming preacher wasn’t enough, Jessica must face down the demons that lurk around every corner. No matter what she wants from life, everything seems to lead to a final showdown with the devil. The daughter of God has a choice: face the destiny thrust upon her or find some way to forge her own path…And It Was GoodAs she enters the uncharted territory of high school, Jessica McCloud could use a few more friends who believe in her. Of course, that means something entirely different for the daughter of God. After her two-millennia-dead half-brother visits her in a dream and tells her it’s time for her to stop messing around, Jessica begins the hunt to discover what miracles she can perform. And if one of them happens to win the heart of her long-time crush, Greg, then so be it. But when a reporter with a grudge against God catches wind of her first miracle, Jessica stumbles her way through one scandal after another until she wonders if the world wouldn’t be a much happier place with no miracles at all. It's a Miracle! Miracles happen when you least expect them. And if you’re Jessica McCloud, God’s only begotten daughter, they happen when you least want them. Is an uneventful senior year of high school too much for Jessica to hope for?Yes. Yes it is.Instead of focusing on college applications, Jessica must juggle Jimmy’s newest scheme, Eugene’s latest slander, and a gruesome (unpaid) internship at Midland Memorial Hospital. And just when she’s starting to get the hang of it, a serious PR blunder ignites a firestorm of brand new accusations. It would take nothing short of a miracle for Jessica to come out on top this round, and she isn’t holding her breath…

    R is one of the most powerful and flexible statistical software packages available, and enables the user to apply a wide variety of statistical methods ranging from simple regression to generalized linear modelling. Statistics: An Introduction using R is a clear and concise introductory textbook to statistical analysis using this powerful and free software, and follows on from the success of the author's previous best-selling title Statistical Computing. * Features step-by-step instructions that assume no mathematics, statistics or programming background, helping the non-statistician to fully understand the methodology. * Uses a series of realistic examples, developing step-wise from the simplest cases, with the emphasis on checking the assumptions (e.g. constancy of variance and normality of errors) and the adequacy of the model chosen to fit the data. * The emphasis throughout is on estimation of effect sizes and confidence intervals, rather than on hypothesis testing. * Covers the full range of statistical techniques likely to be need to analyse the data from research projects, including elementary material like t-tests and chi-squared tests, intermediate methods like regression and analysis of variance, and more advanced techniques like generalized linear modelling. * Includes numerous worked examples and exercises within each chapter. * Accompanied by a website featuring worked examples, data sets, exercises and solutions: http: //www.imperial.ac.uk/bio/research/crawl... Statistics: An Introduction using R is the first text to offer such a concise introduction to a broad array of statistical methods, at a level that is elementary enough to appeal to a broad range of disciplines. It is primarily aimed at undergraduate students in medicine, engineering, economics and biology - but will also appeal to postgraduates who have not previously covered this area, or wish to switch to using R.

    Available here:readmeaway.com/download?i=1593279523The Linux Command Line, 2nd Edition: A Complete Introduction PDF by William ShottsRead The Linux Command Line, 2nd Edition: A Complete Introduction PDF from No Starch Press,William ShottsDownload William Shotts’s PDF E-book The Linux Command Line, 2nd Edition: A Complete Introduction

    Written for both experienced and new programmers alike, Learning Ruby is a just-get-in-and-drive book -- a hands-on tutorial that offers lots of Ruby programs and lets you know how and why they work, just enough to get you rolling down the road. Interest in Ruby stems from the popularity of Rails, the web development framework that's attracting new devotees and refugees from Java and PHP. But there are plenty of other uses for this versatile language. The best way to learn is to just try the code! You'll find examples on nearly every page of this book that you can imitate and hack. Briefly, this book:Outlines many of the most important features of Ruby Demonstrates how to use conditionals, and how to manipulate strings in Ruby. Includes a section on regular expressions Describes how to use operators, basic math, functions from the Math module, rational numbers, etc. Talks you through Ruby arrays, and demonstrates hashes in detail Explains how to process files with Ruby Discusses Ruby classes and modules (mixins) in detail, including a brief introduction to object-oriented programming (OOP) Introduces processing XML, the Tk toolkit, RubyGems, reflection, RDoc, embedded Ruby, metaprogramming, exception handling, and other topics Acquaints you with some of the essentials of Rails, and includes a short Rails tutorial. Each chapter concludes with a set of review questions, and appendices provide you with a glossary of terms related to Ruby programming, plus reference material from the book in one convenient location. If you want to take Ruby out for a drive, Learning Ruby holds the keys.

    The open nature of the Android OS offers programmers the freedom to access the platform's capabilities and this straightforward guide walks you through the steps for creating amazing Android applications. Android programming expert Donn Felker explains how to download the SDK, get Eclipse up and running, code Android applications, and submit your finished products to the Android Market. Featuring two sample programs, this introductory book explores everything from the simple basics to more advanced aspects of the Android platform.Takes you soup through nuts of developing applications for the Android platform Begins with downloading the SDK, then explains how to code Android applications and submit projects to the Android Market Written by Android guru Donn Felker, who breaks every aspect of developing applications for the Android platform into easily digestible pieces No matter your level of programming experience, Android Application Development For Dummies is an ideal guide for getting started with developing applications for the Android platform.

    With countless satisfied developers, tens of thousands of freely available libraries, and continual improvements to the language and its ecosystem, modern Perl development can be easy, reliable, and fun. To take advantage of the full power of Perl 5--to become a true expert, capable of solving any problem put before you--you must understand the language. Modern Perl explains Perl 5 from theory to implementation, including Perl 5.12.

    With step-by-step instructions, complete scripts, and expert tips to guide readers, this work gets right down to business - after grounding readers with separate discussions of first the scripting language (PHP) and then the database program (MySQL), it goes on to cover security, sessions and cookies, and using additional Web tools.

    It describes how to index your data, including types you definitely need to know such as MS Word, PDF, HTML, and XML. It introduces you to searching, sorting, filtering, and highlighting search results.Lucene powers search in surprising placesWhat's Inside- How to integrate Lucene into your applications- Ready-to-use framework for rich document handling- Case studies including Nutch, TheServerSide, jGuru, etc.- Lucene ports to Perl, Python, C#/.Net, and C++- Sorting, filtering, term vectors, multiple, and remote index searching- The new SpanQuery family, extending query parser, hit collecting- Performance testing and tuning- Lucene add-ons (hit highlighting, synonym lookup, and others)

    Widely accepted as the authoritative text and reference on electronic circuit design, both analog and digital, this book revolutionized the teaching of electronics by emphasizing the methods actually used by circuit designers -- a combination of some basic laws, rules of thumb, and a large bag of tricks. The result is a largely nonmathematical treatment that encourages circuit intuition, brainstorming, and simplified calculations of circuit values and performance. The new Art of Electronics retains the feeling of informality and easy access that helped make the first edition so successful and popular. It is an ideal first textbook on electronics for scientists and engineers and an indispensable reference for anyone, professional or amateur, who works with electronic circuits.