Thematically covering every subject imaginable, from God to dogs, this collection is the seminal gathering of our national wit and a picture of who we are as a nation - a monument to our monumental silliness.'An Englishman, even if he is alone, forms an orderly queue of one.' George MikesJane Austen, Jo Brand, Craig Brown, Winston Churchill, Alan Clark, Jeremy Clarkson, Billy Connolly, Peter Cook, Tommy Cooper, Stephen Fry, A.A. Gill, Boris Johnson, Samuel Johnson, Maureen Lipman, Spike Milligan, Eric Morecambe, William Shakespeare, George Bernard Shaw, Frank Skinner, Sue Townsend, Peter Ustinov, Queen Victoria, Oscar Wilde, P.G. Wodehouse, Victoria Wood and many more.

    Hard-Hitting Insults for Every OccasionIncluding      •  Insulting Someone’s Intelligence      •  Insulting Someone’s Sexual Prowess      •  Insults for the Office      •  Insults on Game Day     •  Insults throughout History     •  Insults from around the WorldPlus insulting gestures, backhanded compliments, comebacks, all the things you should never say about someone's mama, and much more!

    These top guns of tournament poker are frequent winners in today's highly competitive online scene, as well as in live tourneys. Their collective experience and track record is staggering: more than 35,000 tournaments played, more than 1,000 final tables made, over 200 major wins, and more than $6,000,000 in cashes. They regularly outplay fields consisting of other top professionals victories that are documented by detailed online hand histories.Are you ready to learn winning ways from today's true tournament experts?The authors are not only consistent winners, but powerful teachers as well. Step-by-step, they reveal their decision-making processes, using hands drawn from actual play not examples contrived to fit a particular poker theory.Reading this book is like attending a master class in tournament poker.You'll see the way cutting-edge pros use their wisdom and incredibly extensive experience to analyze almost every poker situation imaginable. Deep-stacked or short-stacked, against single or multiple opponents, you'll learn the skills that will make you a winner, including: - When and how to play aggressively or tightly- When to make moves- When to make continuation bets and when to hold back- How to induce and pick off bluffs- How to accumulate chips without constantly risking your tournament life.Poker is a fun game, but it's even more fun when you win.If you want to become a great tournament player, shouldn't you be learning from the best? NOW You can!

    The majority of scholars now believe that an understanding of verbal aspect is even more important than verb tense (past, present, etc.). Until now, however, there have been no accessible textbooks, both in terms of level and price (most titles on the topic retail for more than $100). In this book, Constantine Campbell investigates the function of verbal aspect within the New Testament Greek narrative. He has done a marvelous job in this book of simplifying the concept without getting caught up using terms of linguistics that no one except those schooled in that field can understand. The book includes exercises, an answer key, glossary of key concepts, an appendix covering space and time, and an index to Scripture cited. Professors and students, at both the undergraduate and graduate levels, will use this is as a supplemental text in both beginning and advanced Greek courses. Pastors that study the Greek text will also appreciate this resource as a supplement to their preaching and teaching.

    Working on the principles that a person learns more quickly by example than by rule, the author has put together a book that abounds in immediately usable German sentences and phrases on a wide variety of subjects.The student will find pleasure in the amusing sketches and drawings used to imbed new vocabulary firmly in the student's mind, in the many excellent photographs of cities and landmarks in German-speaking countries, and in the glimpses of German culture and custom subtly interwoven into the conventional material.The book, though eminently useful for self-study, is especially amenable to classroom use or study with a private tutor. The variety of teaching aids that this book places at the teacher's disposal is remarkable. The lessons contain dialogues, grammar and idiom studies (replete with examples), and extensive practice exercises. In addition there are 28 full-page and double-page sketches of specific scenes (a harbor, a zoo, a theatre, etc.) with pertinent items numbered and identified in German and English; sketches and photographs, which the student is asked to describe in German; German proverbs, jokes, and more.The dialogues and reading material encompass an exceptionally wide range of real-life situations, and are extended to include most of the basic vocabulary one would need in each situation. The analysis of German pronunciation is very comprehensive (and the simple phonetic system used in the early stages is readable by sight). The practice exercises are carefully designed to allow the student to use what he learned. The closing sections contain a summary of grammar, a guide to letter writing (with sample German letters), and a valuable study guide to German literature by Dr. Richard Friedenthal.The book differs from others of its type in that it gives more attention to the elementary stages of learning, and the rate of progress is less rapid than usual. This means that any intelligent person, even if he is an absolute beginner, can with sufficient application arrive at the end of the course confident of having acquired a solid foundation for further study.

    Maybe you learned Spanish verb conjugations and lists of vocabulary, but you still can't speak the language.The Accelerated Spanish system is completely different: You can learn fluent Spanish with a step-by-step system that begins with the fundamentals of the Spanish language, moving from there into actual conversational fluency.This first volume will teach you to think like a Spanish speaker and give you the vocabulary that makes up 50% of the Spanish language.

    With Canon EOS Rebel T3i/600D: From Snapshots to Great Shots, you get the perfect blend of photography instruction and camera reference that will take your images to the next level! Beautifully illustrated with large, vibrant photos, this book teaches you how to take control of your photography to get the image you want every time you pick up the camera.Follow along with your friendly and knowledgeable guide, photographer and author Jeff Revell, and you will: Learn the top ten things you need to know about shooting with the Rebel Use the Rebel's automatic modes to get better shots right away Move on to the Creative zone, where you have full control over the look and feel of your images Master the photographic basics of composition, focus, depth of field, and much more Learn all the best tricks and techniques for getting great action shots, landscapes, and portraits Find out how to get great shots in low light Fully grasp all the concepts and techniques as you go, with assignments at the end of every chapter With Canon EOS Rebel T3i/600D: From Snapshots to Great Shots, you'll learn not only what makes a great shot work--you'll learn how to get that shot using your Rebel.And once you've got the shot, show it off! Join the book's Flickr group, share your photos, and discuss how you use your Rebel to get great shots at flickr.com/groups/canonrebelt3i600dfr....

    Marcin Milkowski, Ph.D. and Prof. Dariusz Jemielniak, Ph.D. It is the largest English-Polish dictionary ever published. It contains over 1.8 million words, covering hundreds of thousands of meanings in over two hundred thousand definitions, includign abbreviations, synonyms, antonyms, et al. Its range is over 20% wider than in the case of any dictionary published before.It is also the first English-Polish dictionary developed in the 21st century, basing on actual English language usage and frequencies (based on corpora of American, British, and Canadian English), covering not only general vocabulary, but also terminology and idioms typical for business, finance, law, medicine, the sciences and technology, including over 150 disciplines! It is the first English-Polish dictionary including words such as QWERTY, screenager, smartphone, tablet or boccia, with their proper pronunciation. The dictionary can replace the standard Kindle e-reader dictionary, to allow one-click lookups (please, note that this functionality is typical for all Kindle e-readers, but not necessarily a tablet).

    This Rosary tool has also been consistently in the Amazon top ten best selling books of Prayer since every month since its release; this includes paperback and kindle prayer books. Buy with confidence and may it enhance your opportunity to pray to Our Lady.This is a tool to allow you to use your Kindle to pray the rosary. This version of the rosary is intended to allow for praying the rosary with the turn of each page acting as a rosary bead. It contains all four rosary mysteries Joyful, Sorrowful, Glorious, and Luminous. The table of contents will allow you to jump to any of the four mysteries. Given that the Kindle, Nook, and other eBook devices allow thousands of books to be carried within them, it makes sense that the most powerful prayer in the world should also be included. Turning one page for each bead of the rosary makes the device feel and respond like a rosary necklace. Praying the rosary is an art which includes a certain rhythm of changing beads and prayers while in contemplation. Other rosary books either teach the prayers or outline the process but don’t account for the rhythm an art of contemplation that the process itself supports. This version allows that process to be integrated into the book itself; no beads required. While I personally love rosary beads, I don’t always have them available. I also like having the precise bible scriptures associated with each Mystery integrated into the process itself; it allows a more detailed focus by reading the actual living word of God without losing rhythm. While I personally know what the mysteries are about and what each decade story is, it adds a bit of opportunity to read in detail the bible passages of each mystery while not breaking stride with the prayer process. And, if there is ever a moment of distraction by events around me, I never lose my exact spot in praying the rosary.I pray that this book enhances opportunity for you to pray the rosary on many occasions when otherwise you may not have, and I hope it enhances your prayers on a regular basis through deeper connection with the scriptures which are the living word of God. The following updates were made based on user recommendations:VERSION UPDATED JULY 22, 2012 - Changed the table of contents to show the correct day for Luminous Mysteries to be prayed 'Thursday', updated the Glory Be prayer to be included after the first 3 Hail Mary's at the opening of each Mystery, Updated the Glory Be to be worded more technically correct.VERSION UPDATED DECEMBER 11, 2011 - Changed language of Apostle's Creed to match Catholic Church New Translation, fixed misspelled word "beech" to read "beseech", fixed missing bible verse for Mysteries "crowning with thorns" and "coronation of mary".

    Updated atlas contains maps of every U.S. state that are 35% larger than the standard atlas version plus over 350 detailed city inset and national park maps and a comprehensive, unabridged index. Road construction projects and updates highlighted for every state and conveniently located above the maps. Contains mileage chart showing distances between 77 North American cities and national parks with driving times map. Tough spiral binding allows the book to lay open easily. Other Features Best of the Road - Our editor's favorite road trips from our Best of the Road collection follows scenic routes along stretches of coastline, both east and west, to forests mountains, and prairies; and through small towns and big cities. For a weekend or a week there's something for everyone. Tell Rand! As much as we work to keep our atlases up to date, conditions change quickly and new construction projects begin frequently. If you know of something we haven't captured in our atlas, let us know at randmcnally.com/tellrand. Tourism websites and phone numbers for every U.S. state and Canadian province on map pages

    The 4 quilts in this pattern use 1 big block to make quilts that are about 45 inches square finished. The units for these quilts include four patches, nine patches, half square triangles and tri square triangles.

    But when Lady Clifton dies soon after giving birth, Sir George hands the child over to be brought up on Beeswing Farm. John Hoverton and Laurie Clifton are raised as brothers.

    This workbook offers 80 pages of printing activities that also reinforce literacy skills by using words children need to read and write for school. With easy-to-follow directions children will have fun learning to print! Features activities that teach: ~How to write each letter of the alphabet ~Combining letters to make words ~Combining words to make sentences The popular Brighter Child Workbook series offers a full complement of instruction, activities, and information in 51 subject-specific workbooks. Encompassing preschool to grade 6, this series covers key subjects including basic skills, English & grammar, math, phonics, reading, science, and Spanish. This series is helping prepare children by giving them a solid foundation in key skills necessary for success in the classroom

    This methodology revealed distinct cyclical patterns that were used to provide the foundation for his forecasting. The wonderful advances in science add to the mix, but are tools to use, not answers that should automatically be accepted as we see with the climate agenda. The lesson in weather, in history, in anything, is that the foundation you stand on today is built from yesterday to reach for tomorrow. The book examines the clash between that philosophy and one that minimizes lessons of the past, or ignores them, and uses climate and weather to simply further an agenda that has very little to do with either. An uncurious media is a willing accomplice in advancing the missive to the population, The Climate Chronicles reveals that clash in an effort to get the reader to search beyond what they are told. As such its a must read for those seeking not an agenda driven answer, but the right answer, wherever it may lead them. Bastardi's goal is not to get you to blindly accept what he says, but to dig in and examine for yourself. The book shows, given the implications of not doing so, more is at stake than just tomorrows weather.

    It's a strange language, a little like English. Without it, how would our intrepid journalists be able to describe a world in which innocent bystanders look on in horror, where tots in peril are saved by have-a-go heroes, and where troubled stars lash out in foul-mouthed tirades?Robert Hutton has been working around native journalese speakers for two decades, living as one of them and learning their ways, and now he has made their secrets available to the public for the first time. When he first began collecting examples online, he provoked a 'Twitter storm', and was 'left reeling' by the 'scores' of examples that 'flooded in'. He realized that phrases which started as shorthand to help readers have become a dialect that is often meaningless or vacuous to non-journalese speakers.In a courageous attempt both to wean journalists off their journalese habit, and provide elucidation for the rest of us, Romps, Tots and Boffins catalogues the highs and lows of this strange language, celebrating the best examples ('test-tube baby', 'mad cow disease'), marvelling at the quirky ('boffins', 'frogmen') and condemning the worst ('rant', 'snub', 'sirs'). It's a 'must-read' 'page-turner' that may 'cause a stir', 'fuel controversy', or even 'spark' 'tough new rules' in newsrooms.Shortlisted for the Political Humour Book of the Year at the PaddyPower Political Book Awards 2014 "great joy from Robert Hutton's Romps, Tots and Boffins. Never has the weird language of headlines been so wittily defined."--Libby Purves, 'books of the year', The Times"Robert Hutton...has set himself up as the Dr Johnson of this strange, widely read, hardly spoken, language."--Matthew Engel, Financial Times"I'm loving a little book just out by my fellow political journalist Rob Hutton. It's called Romps, Tots and Boffins: The Strange Language of News but is so much more than a hilarious compendium of the ghastly cliché to which our trade is prone. "--Matthew Parris, The Times"An essential guide to finding out what you are reading about. Some people may dismiss this as a 'loo book' but, actually, it's so much more."--Ann Treneman, The Times"A right romp"--Paul Dietrich, The Metro"A fascinating code-breaker of the cliches, inanities and banalities which fill our newspapers. Or, if you prefer, 'News Secrets Revealed Leaving Bosses Shamefaced'. I'm not sure I dare write another word."--Nick Robinson"Finally, I understand what my fellow journalists are writing about."--Simon Hoggart"Long journey to Lib Dem Conference enlivened by Robert Hutton's journalese book, Romps, Tots + Boffins - hilarious, wonderful, + very true - a mini classic"--Andrew Sparrow, Guardian Politics blogger"Very funny new book by Robert Hutton - "Romps, Tots + Boffins: the strange language of news" - a must-read page-turner"--Iain Martin, former editor of the Scotsman and Scotland on Sunday"For readers, it promises to explain what journalists really mean. And for journalists, it also provides a guide to some of the hackneyed, arcane and clichéd phrases that are probably best avoided."--Axegrinder, Press Gazette"an amusing dictionary of arcane hack-speak"--Michael Deacon, The Telegraph"The world of journalism was rocked to its foundations last night as a top newsman claimed to have discovered the secret of 'journalese'." --John Rentoul, The Independent