Both are pretty easy to put off as they're very expensive and tend to wreck your house.' Stand-up comedian Sam Avery (aka the Learner Parent) started his award-winning blog when his twin boys were born. A million nappies, Peppa Pig episodes and a lot less sleep later, he shares all the lows, highs and hilarious in-betweens of his experiences of first-time parenthood in this, his highly anticipated first book. Sam's honest, messy and laugh-out-loud account of trying for a baby (which transpired to be babIES) and figuring out what to do with them once they arrived - right up to the toddler years of talking, walking and tantrum-ing - will have you crying with laughter between your own nappy changes and nursery runs.

    While Mickey was a good person at heart, he had a dark side that went far beyond his well-known alcoholism and infidelities. In this fictional portrait, Mickey--now in heaven--realizes that he’s carrying a huge weight on his shoulders, as he did throughout his life. He needs to unburden himself of all the horrible things he did and understand for himself why he did them. He wants to make amends to the people he hurt, especially those dear to him; the fans he ignored and alienated; and the public who made him into a hero. Mickey never felt he deserved the adulation, could never live up to it, and tried his damnedest to prove it to everyone. The fact that he was human made the public love him that much more.Through the recounting of his exploits on and off the field, some of them side-splittingly hilarious, some disturbing, and others that will make your head shake in sympathy, Mickey comes clean in this novel in the way he never could in real life. 7: The Mickey Mantle Novel puts you inside the locker room and bedroom with an American Icon every bit as flawed and human as we are.

    The profession requires cops to see people at their worst. They see death, tragedy, crime, and despair on a daily basis. The very nature of the tasks cops perform and the things cops see skews their sense of humor. Sometimes, a sense of humor is the only defense mechanism in a police officer's tool box. Stripped of the ability to laugh, or forced to be politically correct in a politically incorrect work environment can be hazardous to one's health. Coping becomes an essential component of a police officer's arsenal. One of the primary coping mechanisms utilized by cops is humor. A cop can find something funny about almost anything, regardless of how tragic the circumstances. Dark humor involves making light of a serious, disturbing or taboo subject matter. It is sometimes viewed as morbid, cruel, offensive, and graphic in nature and is yet, still found funny. This is the story of the author's twenty-year police career with the New York City Transit Police and NYPD as he worked with some of New York City's darkest knights - those cops who did and said the funniest things under the most difficult circumstances.

    . .Then Titus is arrested and sent to prison for attending a Reform meeting. Jennet is left to fend for herself and things go from bad to worse as she finds herself pregnant and alone – with another man’s child . . .

    Any villains who got in his way were made to pay - often with their blood. But when his son died of a drugs overdose, the old-school mobster swore revenge on the new generation of Liverpool-based heroin and cocaine dealers. Against all odds, he turned undercover informant. The first gangster to fall foul of Grimes' change of heart was Curtis Warren, aka 'Cocky', the wealthiest and most successful criminal in British history. Grimes infiltrated his cocaine cartel and led Customs to the largest narcotics seizure on record, putting Warren in the dock in the drugs trial of the twentieth century. After turning his attention to heroin baron John Haase, Grimes rose to become the boss of the villain's notoriously bloodthirsty 'security firm' - a professional gang of racketeers addicted to cocaine, explosive violence and non-stop criminality. But as his net began to tighten, Grimes was confronted with the ultimate dilemma. He discovered his second son was now a rising star in the drugs business. The life-or-death question was: should he shop him or not?Powder Wars also reveals the secrets behind one of the most controversial episodes in British judicial history - how former Home Secretary Michael Howard was duped into granting John Haase a Royal Pardon.Today, Paul Grimes has a £100,000 contract on his head and is a real-life dead man walking. Powder Wars is a riveting account of modern gangsters told in brutal detail.

    Fourteen-year-old Victoria Keats is horrified when her father demands that she go to work for wealthy Mr Preston – everyone knows why he takes young girls into his house. But her violent father, who’s never let her forget she’s not the son he wanted, won’t listen to her concerns – and when she stands up for herself, he throws her out of their dingy little house in the slums.Intelligent, book-loving Vicki vows to make her father regret this day; but she is all alone in the world. Despite her courage and quick wits, it seems likely she will starve – until two men, both complete strangers, provide her with no-strings-attached help.As Vicki’s life improves beyond all recognition, she can’t help but fixate on the mystery of these two good Samaritans: who were they? And why did they help her? She determines to find the men and thank them, but tracking them down may be harder – and more life-changing – than she thinks . . .

    G. Wodehouse Biography NovelsThe Adventures of SallyThe Clicking of CuthbertA Damsel in DistressThe Coming of BillThe Gem CollectorThe Girl on the BoatThe Gold BatThe Head of Kay'sIndiscretions of ArchieThe Intrusion of JimmyJill the Reckless or The Little WarriorThe Little NuggetLove Among the Chickens Illustrated by Armand BothMike Illustrated by T. M. R. WhitwellMike and PsmithA Man of MeansMy Man JeevesNot George Washington. An Autobiographical NovelPiccadilly JimThe PothuntersA Prefect's UncleThe Prince and BettyPsmith in the CityPsmith, JournalistRight Ho, JeevesSomething NewThe Swoop! or How Clarence Saved EnglandTales of St. Austin'sThree Men and a MaidUneasy MoneyThe White FeatherWilliam Tell Told Again Illustrated by Philip Dadd Stories Collections Death At The ExcelsiorJeeves Takes Charge and Other Stories The Man Upstairs and Other StoriesThe Man With Two Left Feet And Other StoriesThe Politeness of Princes and Other School Stories StoriesAhead of Schedule Archibald's BenefitAt Geisenheimer's The Autograph Hunters The Best SauceBill the BloodhoundBlack for LuckBy Advice of Counsel Concealed Art A Corner in Lines Crowned Heads Death at the ExcelsiorDeep WatersDisentangling Old Duggie Extricating Young Gussie The Goal-Keeper and the Plutocrat The Good Angel The Guardian An International Affair In AlcalaJeeves and the Chump Cyril Jeeves in the Springtime Jeeves Takes Charge The Making of Mac's The Man, the Maid, and the Miasma The Man with Two Left FeetThe Man Upstairs The Man Who Disliked CatsThe Mixer Misunderstood One Touch of Nature Out of School Pillingshot, Detective The Politeness of Princes Pots O'Money The Romance of an Ugly Policeman Rough-Hew Them How We WillRuth in Exile A Sea of Troubles Shields' And the Cricket Cup Sir Agravaine a Tale of King Arthur's Round Table Something to Worry About The Test Case Tom, Dick, and Harry Three from Dunsterville The Tuppenny Millionaire When Doctors Disagree When Papa Swore in Hindustani Wilton's Holiday ArticlesSome Aspects of Game-Captaincy An Unfinished Collection The New AdvertisingThe Secret Pleasures of Reginald My Battle with Drink In Defense of AstigmatismPhotographers and Me A Plea for Indoor Golf The Alarming Spread of Poetry My Life As a Dramatic Critic The Agonies of Writing a Musical Comedy On the Writing of Lyrics The Past Theatrical Season PoemsDamon and Pythias The Haunted Tram

    They were happy times, but money was tight. Paddy slept on a mattress he dragged in from the street, and at 17 he struggled severely with the stress of juggling a college course and two jobs to support his beloved mum.But while cash may have been short, grit and wit were in over-supply, and this is the improbable true story of the lad who went from kipping in abandoned cars in Bolton to racing supercars on Top Gear, via laying concrete floors in prisons, a lively career in a leisure centre, a showbiz intervention by school pal Peter Kay and eye-popping adventures in the world of teledom.There has been mischief and misadventure, joy and sorry, huge success and unexpected challenges. It's a lifey well lived, and an unforgettable personal memoir written from the heart.

    Part 1 King Henry IV. Part 2 King Henry V King Henry VI. Part 1 King Henry VI. Part 2 King Henry VI. Part 3 King Richard III King Henry VIII Troilus and Cressida Coriolanus Titus Andronicus Romeo and Juliet Timon of Athens Julius Caesar Macbeth Hamlet King Lear Othello Anthony and Cleopatra Cymbeline Pericles Venus and Adonis Rape of Lucrece Sonnets Lover's Complaint Passionate Pilgrim Sonnets to Sundry Notes of Music Phoenix and the Turtle

    Robin Robertson has written a book of remarkable cohesion and range that calls on his knowledge of folklore and myth to fuse the old ways with the new. From raw, exposed poems about the end of childhood to erotically charged lyrics about the end of desire, from a brilliant retelling of the metamorphosis and death of Actaeon to the final freeing of the waters in "Holding Proteus," these are close examinations of nature--of the bright epiphanies of passion and loss.At times sombre, at times exultant, Robertson's poems are always firmly rooted in the world we see, the life we experience: original, precise, and startlingly clear.

    Corner shops nestle beside the tiny terraced houses and two minutes away is the lively Tower Road market, where it is said, if you can't buy something then it's not made. Once World War Two breaks out, however, life in Conner Street changes dramatically - for ever...

    A perfect evening of comedy. Scenes Include:ACT ONEWord Dance (Part One)The Night the Bed FellFables for Our Time (Part One)The Wolf at the DoorThe Unicorn in the GardenThe Little Girl and the WolfIf Grant Had Been Drinking at AppomattoxCasuals of the KeysThe Macbeth Murder MysteryGentleman ShoppersThe Last FlowerACT TWOThe Pet DepartmentFile and ForgetMr. Preble Gets Rid of His WifeTake Her Up TenderlyThe Secret Life of Walter MiddyWord Dance (Part Two) Only material authorized for the production of this play may be used."Of belly laughs there is abundance...Small, cozy, and completely captivating revue...a sheer delight... joyous, magnificently lunatic festival" - New York Daily News

    It was done at last. They were married. The wedding took place in Naples, a city of burning rubble and poverty – for the time was 1944 and the Germans were in retreat. Thousands of Italians were starving and prepared to do anything to survive. Liana was more determined than most, not only to survive, but to get out of the hell-hole that Naples had become. She had lied, cheated, played provocative games, and now stood in a crumbling church before an emaciated priest. Beside her stood Nicholas Hamilton-Howard, Earl of Wessex, a young English officer who was totally bewitched by the exquisite Italian girl. Even during the service she was terrified – terrified that someone would reveal the truth about her, but when the final blessing was given she knew she was safe and she vowed to devote her life to making Nicholas happy, even though she did not love him – even though their life together was to be built on lies and deception… Angela Arney was born in Hampshire, where she still lives with her husband. She has been a teacher, a hospital administrator and a cabaret singer. The author of a number of romances, Cast the First Stone is her first full-length novel.

    His slow descent into semi-madness is chronicled here, in The Office, The Scripts volume 2. Following on from the phenomenal success of series 1 voted Comedy of the Year at the British Comedy Awards the second series averaged over 4 million viewers, with a 25% audience share. This book features the scripts from all six episodes and contains over 500 picture screengrabs taken from the broadcast masters and available exclusively in this BBC publication. Original and accurate and painfully funny: it will have every office in the country twitching with spasms of recognition This is a gem. The Times

    This intriguing story is juxtaposed with the captivating tale of Henry’s younger sister, Mary Tudor. Almost everyone knows that King Henry VIII of England had six wives and two daughters, but many do not realize that he also had two sisters. Both of King Henry’s sisters became queens through dynastic marriages, but their fates were very different. Margaret, King Henry’s elder sister, became Queen of Scotland, while Mary, his younger sister, became Queen of France. The Nymph from Heaven is a historical novel based on the life of Henry’s younger sister, Mary Tudor. Mary, not to be confused with her niece, “Bloody” Mary, graced the stage of European politics for only a few short years, but her story is a fascinating one. Born a beautiful princess into Tudor England in the late Middle Ages, Mary’s hand was sought in marriage from the age of three. But bound to duty by her high position, Mary knew that any match arranged for her would almost certainly take her out of England for marriage with a stranger in a foreign land. But Mary falls in love with a poor English knight, and is determined to marry him. Through many trials and tribulations, and against all odds, Mary marries her one true love. But the price may prove too high.