Sometimes we tell these stories to make people laugh. Sometimes we tell them to make people think. Sometimes we tell them so we can increase the chances we'll see the other person naked.Paul Shirley's stories are about an adulthood spent all over the world: living in Spain, playing in the NBA, and having his heart (and spleen) broken. But they're also stories about growing up in small-town Kansas: triumphant spelling bees, catastrophic middle school dances, and a Sex Ed. class taught by his mother.They're funny stories. They're vulnerable stories. Most of all, they're universal stories, just as the stories we tell on dates should be.

    For Claire Anderson, this crosses the line. To make matters worse, they’re on the lam and can’t be returned to sender until In Between, the afterlife way station, can arrange transportation to pick them up. In the meantime, Claire tries to contain this motley crew, hoping to stave off an international incident. How do they manage to walk among us? Will Claire succeed in repatriating them? And at what cost? The Afterlife Coach is a humorous tale of second chances, self-awareness and, for those among us who make bad choices, demonstrates just how hard it is to die happily ever after.

    And after he handed in a scorching book report of the classic novel, Old Shep, My Pal, detention is just what he’s been handed. He is sure he’s done nothing wrong: he hated every minute of that book, especially when the dog dies in the end! Why do dogs always die at the end? Wallace refuses to do a rewrite of his report, so his English teacher, who happens to be directing the school play of Old Shep, My Pal, forces him go to the rehearsals to teach him a lesson on why the story is the way it is. Surrounded by theater kids who are apprehensive of him, Wallace sets out to prove himself. But not by changing his mind. Instead, he changes the play into a rock-and-roll rendition, complete with Rollerblades and a moped!

    

    She clings tenaciously to Dirk, her boyfriend of five years, employing every trick she can to keep his interest. When she finds a message taped inside her pajamas, she thinks Dirk has finally proposed. But he hasn't, and Liza's life is about to become interesting in ways she never imagined.Agent Link Stone thinks Liza Benson is a mousy schoolteacher who needs attention, but when she tells him she's worried about a message in her pajamas, he's sure she's insane. Grudgingly he begins to investigate her story only to realize Liza has somehow become involved in a sinister plot. Now he's convinced her boyfriend is a cold-blooded killer, but how to convince Liza? And, more importantly, how to keep from falling for her himself?

    Although by now, not such a green graduate, the animals and their owners keep her challenged in a way never described in the text books.

    Man versus monster; conflict versus conversation; age versus youth; humanity versus its environment; utopia versus what we're living through now. This is a combative and moving book and an answer to anyone who's ever accused poetry of receding into irrelevance.

    With more than 150 new games, this will provide hours of entertainment!Big Nate Super Scribbler is a fantastic addition to the growing collection of Big Nate novels, comic compilations, and activity books from creator Lincoln Peirce.Diary of a Wimpy Kid author Jeff Kinney says, "Big Nate is funny, big time!"

    Worst of all, they've stolen it right from her house! The Diamond & Kulniki Detective Agency must get right to work. Unfortunately, all of their super sleuthing leads Stevie and her partner Jesse right to their apartment building's garbage bin. Will they ever be able to get through the banana peels, ketchup packs, and rotten, smelly trash to solve the crime?

    The wit and wisdom of the West, as documented by Dalton Wilcox, poet laureate of the West.

    With her long hair and bright eyes, she is beautiful, but she can see in the dark, hunt better than any farmhand and communicate with the creatures of the forest. One day in the woods, Irina meets the ancient wise-woman Raizel, who reveals the truth: Irina is a princess, the long-lost daughter of King Harmon and Queen Chloe of Ragnor. Unsure of her place, Irina returns home, only to find her kingdom threatened by a wicked magician intent on revenge. Yet in the coming days of battle, could it be that a princess with the courage of a warrior and the instincts of a wolf is exactly what Ragnor needs?

    Because of an unhealthy relationship with the bottle, he’s ruined his reputation as one of the South’s preeminent commissioned metal sculptors. And his desperate turn to ice sculpting might’ve led to a posse of angry politicians on his trail. With the help of his sane and practical potter wife, Raylou, Harp understands that it’s time to return to the mig welder. Yes, it’s time to prove that he can complete a series of twelve-foot-high metal angels—welded completely out of hex nuts—for the city of Birmingham. Is it pure chance that the Elbow Boys, their arms voluntarily fused so they can’t drink, show up in order to help Harp out in a variety of ways? And why did his neighbor smuggle anteaters into desolate Ember Glow? Is it true that there’s no free will?

    Because the machine, code named Belch, is doing their homework for them, they start spending a lot of time together, attracting a lot of attention. And attention is exactly what you don't want when you are keeping a secret. Before long, members of the D Squad, as they are called at school are getting strange Instant Messages from a shady guy named Milner; their teacher, Miss Rasmussen, is calling private meetings with each of them and giving them pop tests that they are failing; and someone has leaked the possibility of a homework machine to the school newspaper. Just when the D Squad thinks things can't get any more out of control, Belch becomes much more powerful than they ever imagined. Soon the kids are in a race against their own creation, and the loser could end up in jail...or worse!

    Over 15,000 sold! Relive some of the most hilarious moments in television with the SCTV troupe.

    Regardless of religion, race, sex, sexuality or nationality. He hates all of you. Basically, you are fucked." God is pissed off. He has run out of patience with humans and decided that our time is over. We've had our chance and its back to the drawing board. "Fuck the lot of them" is his newest gospel. Mo, and Jay, best Friends who've fucked up in the past, beg him for one more chance to get the humans back on track. Alongside Mr Saluzar, the head of a global charity foundation, and Nick, The Fallen Angel, they hurtle towards Armageddon and their one chance to prove God wrong. They have seven days to save us. On The Seventh Day contains strong language and religious irreverence which some may find offensive. Irreverent dark humour from the author of Lanarkshire Strays and the dEaDINBURGH series.