Is It a Choice?: Answers to the Most Frequently Asked Questions about Gay & Lesbian People


Eric Marcus - 1993
    Offering frank insight on everything you've always wanted-and needed-to know about same-gender relationships, coming out, family roles, politics, and much more, including:How do you know if you're gay or lesbian? What should you do if your child is gay or lesbian? Do gay parents raise gay children? If you think a friend is gay or lesbian, what should you say? Why do gay men and women want to get married? What does the Bible say about homosexuality?

Families Like Mine: Children of Gay Parents Tell It Like It Is


Abigail Garner - 2004
    Like the millions of children growing up in these families today, she often found herself in the middle of the political and moral debates surrounding lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) parenting.Drawing on a decade of community organizing, and interviews with more than fifty grown sons and daughters of LGBT parents, Garner addresses such topics as coming out to children, facing homophobia at school, co-parenting with ex-partners, the impact of AIDS, and the children's own sexuality.Both practical and deeply personal, Families Like Mine provides an invaluable insider's perspective for LGBT parents, their families, and their allies.

Why Marriage Matters: America, Equality, and Gay People's Right to Marry


Evan Wolfson - 2004
    It is the work of one of the most influential attorneys in America, who has dedicated his life to the protection of individuals' rights and our Constitution's commitment to equal justice under the law. Above all, it is a clear, straightforward book that brings into sharp focus the very human significance of the right to marry in America—not just for some couples, but for all. Why is the word marriage so important? Will marriage for same-sex couples hurt the "sanctity" of the institution? How can people of different faiths reconcile their beliefs with the idea of marriage for same-sex couples? How will allowing gay couples to marry affect children? In this quietly powerful volume, the most authoritative and fairly articulated book on the subject, Wolfson demonstrates why the right to marry is important—indeed necessary—for all couples and for America's promise of equality.

The Best Little Boy in the World Grows Up


Andrew Tobias - 1998
    But "John Reid" didn't write it. Years would pass before the writer could reveal his true identity as Andrew Tobias, America's bestselling financial guru, author of The Only Investment Guide You'll Ever Need. Now, twenty-five years later, Tobias, proud to use his real name, brings his remarkable life story up to date.Writing with his customary charm and frank humor, Tobias tells of love affairs and heartbreak, hot New York parties and tough political battles, the excitement of genuine social change and the tragedy of seeing dear friends die young. Here too are the unforgettable scenes of Tobias revealing his sexual orientation not only to his parents but to the president of the United States.The author is an irresistible companion as he shares with us his proud stories, embarrassing confessions, and hilarious musings on "the homosexual lifestyle." Witty, heartfelt, and wonderfully affirming in every sense, this is Andrew Tobias's finest book to date.

The Jack Bank: A Memoir of a South African Childhood


Glen Retief - 2011
     Glen Retief's childhood was at once recognizably ordinary--and brutally unusual.Raised in the middle of a game preserve where his father worked, Retief's warm nuclear family was a preserve of its own, against chaotic forces just outside its borders: a childhood friend whose uncle led a death squad, while his cultured grandfather quoted Shakespeare at barbecues and abused Glen's sister in an antique-filled, tobacco-scented living room.But it was when Retief was sent to boarding school, that he was truly exposed to human cruelty and frailty. When the prefects were caught torturing younger boys, they invented "the jack bank," where underclassmen could save beatings, earn interest on their deposits, and draw on them later to atone for their supposed infractions. Retief writes movingly of the complicated emotions and politics in this punitive all-male world, and of how he navigated them, even as he began to realize that his sexuality was different than his peers'.

10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do to Improve Their Lives


Joe Kort - 2003
    Joe Kort explores as he guides readers through the complex journey of becoming a gay man. Dr. Kort points out that the beginning of this journey is about taking responsibility for your own life, and reading this book shows you exactly how to do this. Readers will learn how to identify their own internalized homophobia that is preventing many of gay men from leading satisfying lives and keeping them from having healthy relationships.Gay men often say that after coming out they feel better at first, but for many it doesn't last. 10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do to Improve Their Lives provides a thorough map for navigating through the difficult terrain of becoming the gay man you want to be in the context of your family, of your sexual health, and ultimately of a partnered relationship.* Discover how to find your authentic gay self* Learn the five biggest mistakes gay men make when seeking a relationship* Understand how to understand loved ones who disapprove of you being gay* Overcome damaging patterns that are holding you back from a healthy sex life

Lesbian Couples: A Guide to Creating Healthy Relationships


D. Merilee Clunis - 1988
    The book pays special attention to differences of race, class, age and physical ability, and addresses the issues raised when one or both partners are recovering from alcohol, substance, or sexual abuse. The book also addresses differences that lesbians may encounter in their relationships regarding such issues as butch-femme, transgender identity, bisexuality, monogamy, and s/m. Thoroughly readable and extremely helpful, with an updated resource guide, Lesbian Couples is a book that every lesbian will want to own.

Surpassing the Love of Men: Romantic Friendship and Love Between Women from the Renaissance to the Present


Lillian Faderman - 1981
    Surpassing the Love of Men throws a new light on shifting theories of female sexuality and the changing status of women over the centuries.

Place at the Table: The Gay Individual in American Society


Bruce Bawer - 1993
    Bruce Bawer exposes the heated controversy over gay rights and presents a passionate plea for the recognition of common values, "a place at the table" for everyone.

The Velvet Rage: Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man's World


Alan Downs - 2005
    Yet despite the progress of the recent past, gay men still find themselves asking, "Are we really better off?" The inevitable byproduct of growing up gay in a straight world continues to be the internalization of shame, a shame gay men may strive to obscure with a façade of beauty, creativity, or material success. Drawing on contemporary psychological research, the author's own journey to be free of anger and of shame, as well as the stories of many of his friends and clients, The Velvet Rage outlines the three distinct stages to emotional well-being for gay men. Offering profoundly beneficial strategies to stop the insidious cycle of avoidance and self-defeating behavior, The Velvet Rage is an empowering book that will influence the public discourse on gay culture, and positively change the lives of gay men who read it.

No House to Call My Home: Love, Family, and Other Transgressions


Ryan Berg - 2015
    His job was to help these teens discover their self worth, get them back on their feet, earn high school degrees, and find jobs. But he had no idea how difficult it would be, and the complexities that were involved with coaxing them away from dangerous sex work and cycles of drug and alcohol abuse, and helping them heal from years of abandonment and abuse.In No House to Call My Home, Ryan Berg tells profoundly moving, intimate, and raw stories from the frontlines of LGBTQ homelessness and foster care. In the United States, 43% of homeless youth were forced out by their parents because of their sexual orientation or gender identity. Berg faced young people who have battled extreme poverty, experienced unbalanced opportunities, structural racism, and homophobia. He found himself ill-equipped to help, in part because they are working within a system that paints in broad strokes, focused on warehousing young people, rather than helping them build healthy relationships with adults that could lead to a successful life once they age out of foster care.By digging deep and asking the hard questions, and by haltingly opening himself up to his charges, Berg gained their trust. Focusing on a handful of memorable characters and their entourage, he illustrates the key issues and recurring patterns in the suffering, psychology and recovery of these neglected teens.No House to Call My Home will provoke readers into thinking in new ways about how we define privilege, identity, love and family. Because beyond the tears and abuse, the bluster and bravado, what emerges here is a love song to that irrepressible life force of youth: hope.

Serving in Silence


Margarethe Cammermeyer - 1994
    Colonel Cammermeyer's dismissal from the U.S. Army has stirred debate all the way to the Presidency; now she writes of her decision to challenge official policy on homosexuality. 16-page photo insert.

Times Two


Kristen Henderson - 2011
    Times Two is about two women meeting, falling madly in love, and realizing that they are so crazy about each other that they want to have a family together. The fact that they both get pregnant at the exact same time is where things start to get interesting. Sarah Kate Ellis, a high-powered magazine executive, and Kristen Henderson, a laid-back rock star, decide it’s time to start their family. After determining that Sarah should get pregnant first while Kristen works on her band’s new CD, they head to a fertility doctor to start the process. But after months of drug treatments, miscarriages, and heartbreak, Kristen decides to start trying, too. That’s when the utterly improbable happens: Sarah and Kristen find out that they are both pregnant—and are due three days apart. Overjoyed by the news that they are both expecting, Sarah and Kristen are also overwhelmed by all that lies ahead. Both have successful, demanding careers. Both have large, close-knit families nearby, including two strongly opinionated mothers who immediately want to be involved with everything. And both are completely clueless about the challenges they’re about to face. They soon realize that none of their previous accomplishments has prepared them for the highs and lows of impending motherhood: not Kristen’s stint touring with The Rolling Stones, nor Sarah’s march up the corporate ladder in the world of women’s magazines. They go through everything first-time parents-to-be experience—but twice over. They’re producing double the hormones, double the morning sickness, double the cravings, and have double the ups and downs. From the start, Sarah and Kristen think of their babies as twins, each woman carrying half of a set. But for two women who’ve always finished each other’s sentences, they suddenly find themselves on opposite ends of the mothers-to-be spectrum, with different opinions on almost everything. One wants a drug-free birth, while the other wants an epidural at the first sign of a contraction. One is dying to know the baby’s gender, but the other refuses to find out until she hears the baby’s first cry in the delivery room. The difficulties of having two pregnant women under the same roof are multiplied by the legal and social obstacles of being a gay couple. Told from Kristen and Sarah’s insightful and hilarious she said/she said perspective, this touching, modern family adventure will entertain, enlighten, and resonate with readers of all stripes.

Dykes to Watch Out For


Alison Bechdel - 1986
    Grin, giggle, and guffaw your way through this celebrated cartoonist's graphic commentary of contemporary lesbian life.

Coming Out Under Fire: The History of Gay Men and Women in World War Two


Allan Bérubé - 1990
    Here is a dramatic story of these people, revealing the history of the anti-gay policy pursued by the U.S. military authorities in World War II. Two 8-page photo inserts.