His experience was not the little league, boys-of-summer stuff of modern America. For him, it was life and death. Now middleaged and living in California, Alan finds himself coaching a team of eight-year-olds in his beloved sport—and nothing is going right. For a start, the kids are no good at soccer. Secondly, they’re pampered. Born and bred on the sport, Black’s hardscrabble Scottish upbringing consisted of playing tough and victory at all costs. Needless to say, his coaching methods are a far cry from the “winning isn’t everything” mentality his little leaguers have been reared with; and players and parents alike are shocked as Black attempts to transform the losing team through drills and bombast. Alone at night, watching evangelicals on TV, Black finds himself searching for some truth in the culture he finds so bizarre. And it’s with the Tigers that he feels most out of sync—faced with a mix of soft suburban children, a raft of overprotective parents, and an Iranian co-coach called Ali. Told with Black’s uproarious Scottish sensibility, Kick the Balls follows the abrasive, irreverent, and hilarious coach as he contends with a team that winds up with a zero-win record. Both a celebration of his own tough childhood and an account of one man’s navigation of an alien culture, Kick the Balls will delight fans of well-told, laugh-out-loud memoirs.

    There are treatments available that can halt, and in some cases, even reverse the aging process.But how do you know what treatments are best for you? Which of the hippest, hottest, and newest are fabulously effective and which are nothing more than new-age snake oil? Let us be your guides. Dr. and Mrs. Guinea Pig Present The Only Guide You'll Ever Need to the Best Anti-Aging Treatments will outline all the best techniques and treatments, from the so-new-you-haven t-heard-of-them-yet to the tried-and-true; from the perfectly legal to the are-you-trying-to-get-me-arrested; from the simple to the outrageous; and from the cheapest drugstore creams to the most complicated surgeries. We will provide you with the information and research you need to create your own, unique anti-aging plan to look and feel your best forever!"

    Full of wit and charm, Mackle guides readers through a collection of hilarious and vulnerable tales written by moms who have seen it all.Laugh alongside a group of real mamas as they tell of the never-ending joys and unpredictable perils of motherhood. Between diaper fiascos and singing potties, and whether mowing to escape reality or being mistaken as a pile of laundry--hilarity ensues. The extraordinary vulnerability found in Same Here, Sisterfriend will not only remind every mom that she's not alone, but also encourage her to look for grace in even the messiest moments.Sisterfriends keep each other sane, strong, and lighthearted, which is exactly what Holly Mackle's mom-community does, bringing a little levity to the rough trenches of mamahood. So long as sisterfriends are only a text away, they can be sure of one thing--they will never have to face the mom life alone. The mostly true tales of their misadventures include:Animal noises overheard in the Lactation CenterRewarding themselves with chocolate chips while potty trainingAfter effects of the imaginary play game "horse bath"Cell phone photos they can't imagine deletingWith a little commiseration and a lot of laughter, the ladies behind the creation of Same Here, Sisterfriend encourage moms everywhere to let go of the image of perfection and rest in knowing that their sisterfriends have their back. So it's time to link arms in sisterfriend solidarity, because we might as well laugh, mama.

    Following the death of her parents, Christine goes to live on a housing scheme with her sister Kirsty, her brother-in-law and niece. But while existence on the housing scheme leaves much to be desired, Christine is as determined as ever to live a full and happy life. With much humour, warmth and charm, Fraser explores the realities of growing up in a wheelchair, as well as her experiences of working in a factory, of finding love, and of beginning what would become a successful writing career. Set against the evocative backdrop of the Scottish Highlands, Roses Round the Door is a heart-warming tale that is every bit as delightful and moving as Blue Above the Chimneys. Praise for Christine Marion Fraser ‘Christine Marion Fraser writes characters so real they almost leap out of the pages… you would swear she must have grown up with them.’ — The Sun ‘Christine Marion Fraser weaves an intriguing story in which the characters are alive against a spellbinding background'— Yorkshire Herald Fraser writes with a great depth of feeling and has the knack of making her characters come alive. She paints beautiful pictures of the countryside and their changing seasons — Aberdeen Express Full-blooded romance, a strong, authentic setting — The Scotsman Christine Marion Fraser (1938-2002) was one of Scotland's best-selling authors. She was the author of the much-loved Rhanna series, a Scottish saga set on the Hebridean island of Rhanna. She also wrote the acclaimed King’s Croft series as well as the Noble series. Christine’s formative years were spent in the post-war Govan district of Glasgow and she spent her later life in Argyll with her husband.

    Millions of fans have enjoyed Bremer’s observations, insight, and magical storytelling on television broadcasts. Now, in this striking memoir, the Minnesota native and lifelong Twins fan takes fans behind the mic, into the clubhouse, and beyond as only he can. Told through 108 unique anecdotes–one for each stitch in a baseball–Bremer weaves the tale of a lifetime, from childhood memories of the ballfield in remote Dumont, Minnesota, to his early radio days as the “Duke in the Dark,” to champagne soaked clubhouses in 1987 and 1991, and his encounters with Twins legends ranging from Calvin Griffith and Harmon Killebrew, to Kirby Puckett and Kent Hrbek, to Joe Mauer and Justin Morneau. Game Used gives fans a rare seat alongside Bremer and his broadcast partners, including Killebrew, Bert Blyleven, Jack Morris, Jim Kaat, Tom Kelly, and other Twins legends.

    Actually, more like half her weight. At the time, Jennette weighed 372 pounds.Jennette was not born fat. But, by fifth grade, her response to a school questionnaire asking what would you change about your appearance "was I would be thinner.” Sound familiar?Half-Assed is the captivating and incredibly honest story of Jennette’s journey to get in shape, lose weight, and change her life. From the beginning—dusting off her never-used treadmill and steering clear of the donut shop—to the end with her goal weight in sight, Jennette wows readers with her determined persistence to shed pounds and the ability to maintain her ever-present sense of self.

    Broken Bananah is my completely true and overly honest journey through severe genital trauma. What happens when you lose something you love? And... can you really break a penis? Absolutely, and mine was one of the worst on file. Tethered to a catheter and surrounded by that’s-what-she-said jokes, I learned one of life’s greatest lessons: it can always be worse. Experience life and love without a penis in a recovery story that could only happen in New York City. Let’s laugh til we cry, dive into the weird, and grapple with the power of sex in this modern coming-of-something tale.

    For 38 years, she has broken records, winning more games than any NCAA team in basketball history. She has coached an undefeated season, co-captained the first women's Olympic team, was inducted into the Basketball Hall of Fame, and has been named Sports Illustrated 'Sportswoman of the Year'.She owes her coaching success to her personal struggles and triumphs. She learned to be tough from her strict, demanding father. Motherhood taught her to balance that rigidity with communication and kindness. She is a role model for the many women she's coached; 74 of her players have become coaches.Pat's life took a shocking turn in 2011, when she was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer's disease, an irreversible brain condition that affects 5 million Americans. Despite her devastating diagnosis, she led the Vols to win their sixteenth SEC championship in March 2012. Pat continues to be a fighter, facing this new challenge the way she's faced every other--with hard work, perseverance, and a sense of humor.From the Hardcover edition.

    He has played to sold-out venues across North America, Europe, South Africa and Australia. He has sold more than six million DVDs, Forbes has ranked him in their Celebrity 100 list of most powerful entertainers for two years running, and he has been the top touring comedian in the United States for the last two years. Whether he's breathing life into an old curmudgeon, an over- caffeinated purple maniac, or a screaming, skeletal, dead terrorist, Jeff Dunham is the straight man to some of the funniest partners in show business. All by My Selves is the story of one pretty ordinary guy, one interesting hobby, one very understanding set of parents, and a long and winding rode to becoming America's favorite comedian. With wit, honesty, and lots of great show business detail, Jeff shares all the major moments in his journey. From the toy dummy he spotted at a toy store when he was 8 years old to playing to arenas filled with screaming fans, Jeff takes readers behind the curtain to explain how he turned an old fashioned art form into something truly modern and hip. Best of all, Jeff's story is accompanied by asides and interruptions from his characters-who share all the hilarious details Jeff himself is too embarrassed to include.

    Her designs are jaunty, friendly, sometimes quietly funny. They call to mind childhood picnics, summer gardens and busy kitchens, with their motifs of Sweet Peas and Figs or bold calligraphic patterns such as Toast & Marmalade. Above all the name Emma Bridgewater suggests home and welcome. This book combines beautiful photographs of Emma's life and designs with a collection of warm stories of her family, along with the inspirations for and characters involved in the success of this particularly English brand.

    The #1 "New York Times" Bestselling Author of "A Man Called Ove" shares an irresistible and moving collection of heartfelt, humorous essays about fatherhood, providing his newborn son with the perspective and tools he'll need to make his way in the world.

    At the time of my arrest, I was a thirty-seven year old Harvard graduate with medical and post-doctoral degrees. I attended one of the finest residency and fellowship training programs in the world at the University of California, San Francisco. I played two sports in college, earned awards at every level of education and training, had wonderful friends and a beautiful three-year-old daughter. Having grown up the son of a restaurant manager and a housewife, I had transcended the humble beginnings of a small Midwestern town to become the quintessential American Dream.Or so I thought. But with my arrest on felony importation charges, everything I had worked so hard for was swept away and the entire trajectory of my life was indelibly altered. I would embark on a three year battle not only for my medical license, but also for my freedom. This journey would lead to intense personal introspection, and in that process, I would discover with ugliness, there was also beauty, and with punishment, mercy.There are many reasons I have written this manuscript, with one of the most important being that I hoped my story would resonate with others who have gone through difficult circumstances as a consequence of a dark side of their personality. With this book, I hope to inspire others to accept and embrace the good and bad, while continually striving for improved self-understanding and acceptance.I have changed names primarily for legal purposes, but the facts are unchanged. Although the events described in the book occurred more than ten years ago, I think about them nearly every day. The shame and humiliation are ever-present. Any simple Google search of my name reveals the truth, and that truth has affected me over and over, despite the years, as it probably should. As the judge told me that day in a federal courtroom, "You have betrayed the public's trust." This is my confessional.

    Known for her hilariously acerbic observations on her blog, People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Mann now brings her sharp wit to bear on suburban life, marriage, and motherhood in this laugh-out-loud collection of essays. From the politics of joining a play group, to the thrill of mothers’ night out at the gun range, to the rewards of your most meaningful relationship (the one you have with your cleaning lady), nothing is sacred or off-limits. So the next time you find yourself wearing fuzzy bunny pajamas in the school carpool line or accidentally stuck at a co-worker’s swingers party, just think, What would Jen Mann do? Or better yet, buy her book.

    At least that’s how it works when you’re dealing with the legendary mind of Carl Reiner. In his 2013 memoir, “I Remember Me,” Carl treated us to ninety years of professional and personal anecdotes, ranging from witty, weird and heartwarming to insightful, informative, and always funny – usually a combination of at least two, sometimes three or four, of the aforementioned. Carl had taken us on a nostalgic trip through every corner, every nook and cranny, of his life. Or so we thought. But over the next two years, new “old memories” kept coming… and coming… and coming… until, before too long, another book was born. In addition to the above adjectives, “I Just Remembered” adds a whole new batch: the mysterious saga of the gold money clip and the rubber bands; the beautiful and bizarre Joyce Kuntz; the shocking story of Jack Parr and Fidel Castro; never before heard revelations about William Shakespeare; whimsical journeys down the information superhighway via Twitter, Google and YouTube; and for good measure, truly useful health tips for a long and happy life. “I Just Remembered” is the perfect companion to “I Remember Me,” and it will have you asking, over and over, “How could he have forgotten that?!” He didn’t. He just remembered.

    Illustrated with 16 pages of photographs.