Book picks similar to
Loving Someone Gay by Donald H. Clark
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Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality
Christopher Ryan - 2010
Mainstream science--as well as religious and cultural institutions--has maintained that men and women evolved in families in which a man's possessions and protection were exchanged for a woman's fertility and fidelity. But this narrative is collapsing. Fewer and fewer couples are getting married, and divorce rates keep climbing as adultery and flagging libido drag down even seemingly solid marriages.How can reality be reconciled with the accepted narrative? It can't be, according to renegade thinkers Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá. While debunking almost everything we "know" about sex, they offer a bold alternative explanation in this provocative and brilliant book.Ryan and Jethá's central contention is that human beings evolved in egalitarian groups that shared food, child care, and, often, sexual partners. Weaving together convergent, frequently overlooked evidence from anthropology, archaeology, primatology, anatomy, and psychosexuality, the authors show how far from human nature monogamy really is. Human beings everywhere and in every era have confronted the same familiar, intimate situations in surprisingly different ways. The authors expose the ancient roots of human sexuality while pointing toward a more optimistic future illuminated by our innate capacities for love, cooperation, and generosity.With intelligence, humor, and wonder, Ryan and Jethá show how our promiscuous past haunts our struggles over monogamy, sexual orientation, and family dynamics. They explore why long-term fidelity can be so difficult for so many; why sexual passion tends to fade even as love deepens; why many middle-aged men risk everything for transient affairs with younger women; why homosexuality persists in the face of standard evolutionary logic; and what the human body reveals about the prehistoric origins of modern sexuality.In the tradition of the best historical and scientific writing, Sex at Dawn unapologetically upends unwarranted assumptions and unfounded conclusions while offering a revolutionary understanding of why we live and love as we do.
Yay! You're Gay! Now What?: A Gay Boy's Guide to Life
Riyadh Khalaf - 2019
Or maybe you just feel different…in time, that difference will become the greatest gift you could ask for. It will bring you love, a sense of identity, a new community, and eventually the freedom to be yourself. I promise! In this personal, heartfelt go-to guide for young queer guys, broadcaster, YouTuber, and LGBT+ advocate Riyadh Khalaf shares frank advice about everything from coming out to relationships, as well as encouragement for times when you’re feeling low. There’s a support section for family and friends written by Riyadh’s parents and LOADS of hilarious, embarrassing, inspiring, and moving stories from gay boys from around the world. Plus, inspirational gay men including Stephen Fry, Clark Moore, and James Kavanagh share the advice they would give to their younger selves. Packed with practical advice and bright, quirky illustrations and photos, this book contains chapters on:Labels—what does it mean to be gay, bi, trans, or queer?Coming outFirst crushes, first kisses, and first timesDealing with bullies and homophobiaLearning to love your bodySex ed for gay guysConsentHealing heartbreakFinding your tribe
Brave Face
Shaun David Hutchinson - 2019
I was depressed and gay.”Shaun David Hutchinson was nineteen. Confused. Struggling to find the vocabulary to understand and accept who he was and how he fit into a community in which he couldn’t see himself. The voice of depression told him that he would never be loved or wanted, while powerful and hurtful messages from society told him that being gay meant love and happiness weren’t for him.A million moments large and small over the years all came together to convince Shaun that he couldn’t keep going, that he had no future. And so he followed through on trying to make that a reality.Thankfully Shaun survived, and over time, came to embrace how grateful he is and how to find self-acceptance. In this courageous and deeply honest memoir, Shaun takes readers through the journey of what brought him to the edge, and what has helped him truly believe that it does get better.
Bi Any Other Name: Bisexual People Speak Out
Loraine Hutchins - 1991
In this groundbreaking anthology, more than seventy women and men from all walks of life describe their lives as bisexuals in prose, poetry, art, and essays
Annabel
Kathleen Winter - 2010
In 1968, into the devastating, spare atmosphere of Labrador, Canada, a child is born: a baby who appears to be neither fully boy nor fully girl, but both at once. Only three people are privy to the secret—the baby’s parents, Jacinta and Treadway, and their trusted neighbor and midwife, Thomasina. Though Treadway makes the difficult decision to raise the child as a boy named Wayne, the women continue to quietly nurture the boy’s female side. And as Wayne grows into adulthood within the hypermasculine hunting society of his father, his shadow-self, a girl he thinks of as “Annabel,” is never entirely extinguished. When Wayne finally escapes the confines of his hometown and settles in St. John’s, the anonymity of the city grants him the freedom to confront his dual identity. His ultimate choice will once again call into question the integrity and allegiance of those he loves most. Kathleen Winter has crafted a literary gem about the urge to unveil mysterious truth in a culture that shuns contradiction, and the body’s insistence on coming home. A daringly unusual debut full of unforgettable beauty, Annabel introduces a remarkable new voice to American readers.
Transgender 101: A Simple Guide to a Complex Issue
Nicholas M. Teich - 2012
The first guide to treat transgenderism as a distinct topic of study, this text moves beyond mere anecdote and recommendations for clinical practice to legitimatize transgenderism in society and culture.Chapters introduce transgenderism and its psychological, physical, and social processes. They describe the coming out process and its affect on family and friends; the relationship between sexual orientation and gender and the differences between transsexualism and lesser-known types of transgenderism; the characteristics of Gender Identity Disorder; and the development of the transgender movement. Each chapter explains how transgender individuals handle their gender identity, how others view it within the context of "normal" society, and how the transitioning of genders is made possible. The book features men who become women, women who become men, and those who live in between and beyond traditional classifications. Written for friends, family members, students, and professionals, this resource works as a stand alone text for social work and gender studies courses as well as a supportive text for sociologists, psychologists, and clinical practitioners. A special focus on issues affecting transgender youth, along with a glossary of key terms and helpful resources, makes this an ideal guide for younger audiences as well as those invested in their care.
As You Are: Ignite Your Charisma, Reclaim Your Confidence, Unleash Your Masculinity
Nick Sparks - 2015
Around the women who intimidate you most you struggle to think of what to say, sabotage yourself in ways you don't fully understand, and feel confused about when and how to express your sexuality. You worry that you'll have to settle for someone who you're not all that excited to be with (if you're lucky enough to find anyone) and/or face a messy divorce when it inevitably doesn't work out. That's why I wrote this book. I've coached men on improving their social and dating lives for over a decade, charging thousands of dollars for a weekend program, appearing on national news outlets, and amassing millions of views on youtube. I have a success rate with my clients that puts the rest of the industry to shame, and this book represents the very best of what I teach. I want to make this knowledge available now because I know what it's like to feel as though you'll have to settle for whatever comes along... like the women you really want to be with are speaking a different language. I wrote this book because I wish I had it back in middle school. This isn't a collection of pickup lines or tricks. Let's face it - if those worked, you wouldn't be reading this right now. Simply put, this book teaches you to be that person you are when you're "in the zone" all the time. It's about stripping away all the things that are keeping you from being naturally attractive. You've always known that, "just be yourself," was good advice, otherwise it wouldn't be repeated so often. This is the book that finally explains how to do it. In this book you're going to learn: - How to eliminate "rejection" - Why the words you say don't really matter - The action to take that will always get you "in the zone" - How to identify the women that really want you to approach them - Understanding what flirting means, and how to become a master at it - What to text if she doesn't respond - How to know exactly when she wants you to make the move - What to say to start a conversation in any situation - How to make conversations with people who intimidate you flow as smoothly as chats with your best friends - How to get her to contribute equally to the conversation so you don't do most of the talking and run out of things to say - How to easily overcome awkward silences - The secret to being funny - How to move an interaction forward sexually without ever worrying about being called "inappropriate" or "creepy" - How to get a phone number that turns into a date 90% of the time - How to ensure your dates are charged with sexual tension rather than ending in an awkward kiss attempt - The way sexual attraction actually works, and why the lessons you've learned your entire life are wrong - How to turn a friendship into something more - How to build a social circle so you'll always have a "wingman" or someone to hang out with - How to always look great, even if you're shopping on a budget - How to scream confidence with your body language instead of insecurity - The difference between "He was ok" and "He's awesome" - How to develop yourself into the man who naturally attracts the woman (or women) you really want Don't expect anything overly-complicated.
Symptoms of Being Human
Jeff Garvin - 2016
Snarky. Rebellious. And gender fluid. Some days Riley identifies as a boy, and others as a girl. The thing is…Riley isn’t exactly out yet. And between starting a new school and having a congressman father running for reelection in uber-conservative Orange County, the pressure—media and otherwise—is building up in Riley’s so-called “normal” life.On the advice of a therapist, Riley starts an anonymous blog to vent those pent-up feelings and tell the truth of what it’s REALLY like to be a gender fluid teenager. But just as Riley’s starting to settle in at school—even developing feelings for a mysterious outcast—the blog goes viral, and an unnamed commenter discovers Riley’s real identity, threatening exposure. Riley must make a choice: walk away from what the blog has created—a lifeline, new friends, a cause to believe in—or stand up, come out, and risk everything.
Tinderbox: The Untold Story of the Up Stairs Lounge Fire and the Rise of Gay Liberation
Robert W. Fieseler - 2018
In revelatory detail, Robert W. Fieseler chronicles the tragic event that claimed the lives of thirty-one men and one woman on June 24, 1973, at a New Orleans bar, the largest mass murder of gays until 2016. Relying on unprecedented access to survivors and archives, Fieseler creates an indelible portrait of a closeted, blue- collar gay world that flourished before an arsonist ignited an inferno that destroyed an entire community. The aftermath was no less traumatic—families ashamed to claim loved ones, the Catholic Church refusing proper burial rights, the city impervious to the survivors’ needs—revealing a world of toxic prejudice that thrived well past Stonewall. Yet the impassioned activism that followed proved essential to the emergence of a fledgling gay movement. Tinderbox restores honor to a forgotten generation of civil-rights martyrs.
Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-First Century
Barbara Carrellas - 2005
With a juicy mix of erotic how-to and pleasure-centered spiritual wisdom, acclaimed sex educator Barbara Carrellas radically updates the ancient practice of Tantra for modern sexual explorers desiring to push past their edge in search of the great cosmic orgasm.With more than one hundred easy-to-follow techniques for expanded orgasmic states and solo and partner play (as well as more adventurous practices), this in-depth guide reveals the delicious worlds of ecstasy available to all, including:The Erotic Awakening Massage • Breath and Energy Orgasms • Twenty-Minute Tantra Evolutionary Selfloving • Sex and Healing • Tantric BDSMNo matter what your gender, sexual preference, or erotic tastes, URBAN TANTRA will expand your notions about pleasure and open you up to new heights of intimacy and sexual fulfillment.
A Queer History of the United States
Michael Bronski - 2011
Transgender evangelist Jemima Wilkinson, in the early 1800s, changed her name to “Publick Universal Friend,” refused to use pronouns, fought for gender equality, and led her own congregation in upstate New York. In the mid-nineteenth century, internationally famous Shakespearean actor Charlotte Cushman led an openly lesbian life, including a well-publicized “female marriage.” And in the late 1920s, Augustus Granville Dill was fired by W. E. B. Du Bois from the NAACP’s magazine the Crisis after being arrested for a homosexual encounter. These are just a few moments of queer history that Michael Bronski highlights in this groundbreaking book. Intellectually dynamic and endlessly provocative, A Queer History of the United States is more than a “who’s who” of queer history: it is a book that radically challenges how we understand American history. Drawing upon primary documents, literature, and cultural histories, noted scholar and activist Michael Bronski charts the breadth of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender history, from 1492 to the 1990s, and has written a testament to how the LGBT experience has profoundly shaped our country, culture, and history. A Queer History of the United States abounds with startling examples of unknown or often ignored aspects of American history—the ineffectiveness of sodomy laws in the colonies, the prevalence of cross-dressing women soldiers in the Civil War, the impact of new technologies on LGBT life in the nineteenth century, and how rock music and popular culture were, in large part, responsible for the devastating backlash against gay rights in the late 1970s. Most striking, Bronski documents how, over centuries, various incarnations of social purity movements have consistently attempted to regulate all sexuality, including fantasies, masturbation, and queer sex. Resisting these efforts, same-sex desire flourished and helped make America what it is today. At heart, A Queer History of the United States is simply about American history. It is a book that will matter both to LGBT people and heterosexuals. This engrossing and revelatory history will make readers appreciate just how queer America really is.
Herculine Barbin: Being the Recently Discovered Memoirs of a Nineteenth-century French Hermaphrodite
Herculine Barbin - 1978
Herculine was designated female at birth. A pious girl in a Catholic orphanage, a bewildered adolescent enchanted by the ripening bodies of classmates, a passionate lover of a schoolmistress, she's suddenly reclassified as male. Alone & desolate, he commits suicide, aged 30, in a miserable Paris attic. Here's a lost voice of the sexual past in an erotic diary. Provocative, articulate, eerily prescient as she imagines her corpse under the probing instruments of scientists, Herculine brings a disturbing perspective to our notions of sexuality. Foucault, who discovered these memoirs in the archives of the French Department of Public Hygiene, presents them with the graphic medical descriptions of Herculine's body before & after death. In a striking contrast, a painfully confused young person & the doctors who examine her try to sort out the nature of masculine & feminine at the dawn of the age of modern sexuality. "Herculine Barbin can be savored like a libertine novel. The ingenousness of Herculine, the passionate yet equivocal tenderness which thrusts her into the arms, even into the beds, of her companions, gives these pages a charm strangely erotic...Michel Foucault has a genius for bringing to light texts & reviving destinies outside the ordinary."--Le Monde, 7/1978
All Joy and No Fun: The Paradox of Modern Parenthood
Jennifer Senior - 2014
Award-winning journalist Jennifer Senior now asks: what are the effects of children on their parents?"All Joy and No Fun is an indispensable map for a journey that most of us take without one. Brilliant, funny, and brimming with insight, this is an important book that every parent should read, and then read again. Jennifer Senior is surely one of the best writers on the planet."-Daniel Gilbert, author of Stumbling on HappinessIn All Joy and No Fun, award-winning journalist Jennifer Senior isolates and analyzes the many ways in which children reshape their parents' lives, whether it's their marriages, their jobs, their habits, their hobbies, their friendships, or their internal senses of self. She argues that changes in the last half century have radically altered the roles of today's mothers and fathers, making their mandates at once more complex and far less clear. Recruiting from a wide variety of sources-in history, sociology, economics, psychology, philosophy, and anthropology-she dissects both the timeless strains of parenting and the ones that are brand new, and then brings her research to life in the homes of ordinary parents around the country. The result is an unforgettable series of family portraits, starting with parents of young children and progressing to parents of teens. Through lively and accessible storytelling, Senior follows these mothers and fathers as they wrestle with some of parenthood's deepest vexations-and luxuriate in some of its finest rewards.Meticulously researched yet imbued with emotional intelligence, All Joy and No Fun makes us reconsider some of our culture's most basic beliefs about parenthood, all while illuminating the profound ways children deepen and add purpose to our lives. By focusing on parenthood, rather than parenting, the book is original and essential reading for mothers and fathers of today-and tomorrow.
Beyond Tears: Living After Losing a Child
Ellen Mitchell - 2005
In Beyond Tears, nine mothers share their individual stories of how to survive in the darkest hour. They candidly share with other bereaved parents what to expect in the first year and long beyond:* Harmonious relationships can become strained* There is a new definition of what one considers "normal" * The question "how many children do you have?" can be devastating* Mothers and fathers mourn and cope differently* There simply is no answer to the question "why?"This sharing in itself is a catharsis and because each of these mothers lost her child at least seven years ago, she is in a unique position to provide perspective on what newly bereaved parents can expect to feel. The mothers of Beyond Tears offer reassurance that the clouds of grief do lessen with time and that grieving parents will find a way to live, and even laugh again.
Immodest Acts: The Life of a Lesbian Nun in Renaissance Italy
Judith C. Brown - 1985
Brown was an event of major historical importance. Not only is the story revealed in Immodest Acts that of the rise and fall of a powerful woman in a church community and a record of the life of a religious visionary, it is also the earliest documentation of lesbianism in modern Western history. Born of well-to-do parents, Benedetta Carlini entered the convent at the age of nine. At twenty-three, she began to have visions of both a religious and erotic nature. Benedetta was elected abbess due largely to these visions, but later aroused suspicions by claiming to have had supernatural contacts with Christ. During the course of an investigation, church authorities not only found that she had faked her visions and stigmata, but uncovered evidence of a lesbian affair with another nun, Bartolomeo. The story of the relationship between the two nuns and of Benedetta's fall from an abbess to an outcast is revealed in surprisingly candid archival documents and retold here with a fine sense of drama.
