If you or someone you know is discontented, distressed, or downright disturbed, maybe the Great White North is right for you, eh. But how much do you really know about Canada? Can you do a job that Canada needs (do you play hockey, drill for oil, or make poutine?)? Can you identify the best Canadian province for your lifestyle (lots of tundra or just some tundra?)? Can you master the proper pronunciation of "sorry"? What strange wizardry is the Canadian government? Is maple syrup acceptable substitution for currency? At long last, How to Move to Canada can help make your vague threat into a cold Canadian reality. This book is also full of activities such as: Color the flag of your new homeland Match the strange Canuck dialect with their local definitions And more! PLEASE NOTE: This is a humor book. It won't really help you emigrate. Rather, it's a subversive mix of real information on the Great White North plus a hilarious look at all the reasons why you won't like it there any better — and why they probably won't have you anyway.

    Introducing two eccentric ladies who form an unlikely friendship.Meet Mavis and Dot - two colourful, retired ladies who live in Worthington-on-Sea, where there are charity shops galore. Apart from bargain hunting, they manage to tangle themselves in escapades involving illegal immigrants, night clubs, nude modelling, errant toupees and more. And then there’s Mal, the lovable dog who nobody else wants. A gently humorous, often side-splitting, heart-warming snapshot of two memorable characters with past secrets and passions. Escape for a couple of hours into this snapshot of a faded, British seaside town. You'll laugh and cry but probably laugh more."This book is quirky and individual, and has great pathos...[it] will resonate with a lot of readers." Gill Kaye - Editor of Ingenu(e). Written with a light touch in memory of a dear friend who passed away from ovarian cancer, Angela Petch’s seaside tale is a departure from her successful Tuscan novels. All profits from the sale of the books will go towards research into the cure for cancer.

    Throughout his life, Milligan wrote prolifically - scripts, poetry, fiction, as well as several volumes of memoir, in which he took an entirely idiosyncratic approach to the truth. In this ground-breaking work, Norma Farnes, his long-time manager, companion, counsellor and confidante, gathers together the loose threads, reads between the lines and draws on the full breadth of his writing to present his life in his own words: an autobiography - of sorts. From his childhood in India, through his early career as a jazz musician and sketch-show entertainer, his spells in North Africa and Italy with the Royal Artillery, to that fateful first broadcast of The Goon Show and beyond into the annals of comedy history, this is the autobiography Milligan never wrote.

    But when Grayson Park's bride leaves him at the altar, a solo trip to paradise seems like just the thing to take him far from his troubles. Then he meets the beautiful and enigmatic Hi'iaka, and his troubles just begin--because when she's abducted by the sinister Kamapua'a, a savage creature bent on draining her life by the light of the full moon, she calls on Grayson to rescue her. With his loyal, new-found Hawaiian friend Polunu as his steadfast guide, Grayson sets out on an incredible adventure that pits him against the very gods of Hawaiian mythology and leads him to the heart of Pele's volcano, into the ocean to find the mythical Hook of Maui, and through the strange and brutal upcountry fleeing from demonic mo'o sent to destroy him. But there are only two nights left before the moon becomes full, and Grayson is running out of time to save Hi'iaka...and himself.

    Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be a fly on the wall of a creative agency? No? Well, that’s fine as well. You wouldn’t know you were in an agency anyway; flies have no concept of that kind of thing. All they’re interested in is standing in poo then walking around the rim of your coffee mug.

    The station manager who hired him was the first to recognize his considerable on-air talent, and helped start what has become a legendary radio career. Often compared to Howard Stern, Carton has hosted a series of highly rated shows, and in 2007 he joined WFAN, where he and Boomer Esiason host an eponymous show every morning for four hours out of a studio in New York City.In this debut book, Carton invites the reader to join him as he recounts tales from his suburban youth, defends his long-held love affair with the New York Jets, reminisces about the shenanigans of some of the highest paid and most celebrated athletes playing today, and reflects on his work as one of radio’s craftiest, most hilarious personalities ever to get behind the microphone.

    In The Grrl Genius Guide to Life, stand-up comic and Grrl Genius Club founder Cathryn Michon explains why she is a genius and demonstrates how you can become one, too, by following her easy twelve-step program.The first step in the program is the most important: Admit that you are a Grrl Genius. Acknowledge that you are beautiful, intelligent, and talented and that you are the only person in the world who can decide just how great you are. In subsequent steps, you will learn to embrace the domestic arts, love your Grrl Genius good looks, celebrate your sexuality, appreciate your Grrl Genius mother, and pass the Grrl Genius message on to others!Filled with little-known facts about such unacknowledged Grrl Geniuses as Mozart's younger sister Nannerl and Einstein's wife Mileva, as well as hilarious, embarrassing stories from Michon's own life, The Grrl Genius Guide to Life is a must-read for Grrl Geniuses and Enlightened Males everywhere. Michon shares her most humiliating memories -- singing show tunes at her aunt's funeral, crying uncontrollably in an airplane bathroom and holding up the flight -- as well as her moments of triumph, like attending the birth of her niece (a future Grrl Genius) and getting liposuction that not a single human being noticed. This is an uproarious roller-coaster ride through the life of a self-declared Genius -- in which Michon writes about everything from doughnuts to divorce, from physics to push-up bras -- and a comic inspirational guide for those aspiring to Grrl Geniushood.Cathryn Michon is a genius -- just because she says she is. Read her book, and you will become one, too. As with any twelve-step program, becoming a Grrl Genius takes work. All your life you have been telling yourself that your butt is too big, your ideas are too small, and your love for creme-filled doughnuts is inherently evil. With the help of The Grrl Genius Guide to Life, you will learn to recognize your own brilliance, shamelessly proclaim it to the rest of the world, and eat all the Krispy Kreme doughnuts you want. In case you need inspiration, Michon has included numerous Grrl Genius slogans and Little Pink Post-it Notes; in case you get hungry, she has included her recipe for the best chocolate chip cookies in the world. So go on -- take the first step. Read the book that is guaranteed to change your life forever (or at the very least to make you laugh yourself silly) -- and declare your Genius to yourself and the world!

    Killed the Mad King and defeated the Demon Lord.Now that I'm mortal again, all I'd like to do is to brew some tasty ales and serve my regulars at the Tipsy Pelican Tavern.Most of all, I'd like to avoid any trouble involving the church or the nobility.That's not too much to ask right? ....Right?This light novel contains...- Fantasy & Action- An unconventional op mc- A unique magic system- Slice of life arcs- A beautiful cast- Loads of humor- Several pages of original art- A heartwarming moment or two

    His innocent letter requesting an autographed picture begins a bizarre turn of events that eventually costs him his job, foils his romantic intentions toward a coworker, drains his finances, and generally ruins his life. Sid, a Don Quixote character with large blind spots regarding the fate of his one-sided correspondence with the movie star and his own behavior, cannot escape the wrath of lawyers, public relations bulldogs, angry bosses, and ex-girlfriends that drags his life down the tubes. Until he fights back.

    Some move toward the future heartened by what they learn from those around them--a tattoo artist, an invented medicine man, zoo animals, strangers, fellow outsiders. Deftly rendered, these stories abound with oddness and grace.In “Tattooizm,” included in The Best American Short Stories 2006, a young woman struggles with a promise that her boyfriend is determined to make her keep. In the Nelson Algren Award–winning “Space,” a reluctantly undertaken errand forces a young man to finally confront the death of his mother. And in “The Medicine Man,” hailed by the Times (U.K.) as “perfectly pitched and perfectly written,” a man recounts his manic attachment to his sister.Moffett’s closely observed stories are candid and complex, funny and moving. The world of Permanent Visitors is an idiosyncratic and generous one, its inhabitants searching for constancy in a place crowded with contradiction.

    After more than thirty years of being asked the same question—"Why don't you give us some good news for a change?"—veteran television news anchor Bruce Lindsay obliges us with humorous and heartwarming stories from the idyllic town that we believe we grew up in—or wished we did. Inspired from the stories found in real small-town newspapers, Bruce Lindsay introduces us to the down-to-earth, foible-filled characters from Parley's Grove—folks who can make the mundane mesmerizing and the absurd endearing. Warm, poignant, and always hilarious, these affectionate vignettes of small-town life will help you remember who you are and where you're from.

    Book by Jenkins, Dan

    He sleeps in a real bed and eats real food and only jumps into Neuroma to work. All he wanted was to log in, work and log out and live in general obscurity. Getting the attention of a CEO, meeting a stranger in real life, and forced to play in a secret game of corporations were not penciled into his calendar. While that was bad, he started to question whether Odditek was still in control, or had their complacency created the noose tightening around their neck. Bran was not yet aware of the choice before him. He could no longer stand back and watch, and he had to pick a side and fight before he lost the ability to choose. Would he recognize the inevitable in time? Was it possible to make a ‘correct’ choice, or had the lines blurred so much that hero and villain were indistinguishable? This novel is part of an Odditek series and is a LitRPG novel. I realize it’s the first Odditek series, but more are coming. This series started as a companion series to a book called Lantern Online. I wanted a way to build up the world as it now exists, and to explain what Odditek is. Neuroma and Nerves are mentioned in Lantern Online, and I felt all that information was taking away from my story and is mostly not relevant, but good to know information. I took a lot of it out and added it to this series. Anyway, out of that came Office Wars. I hope it's different than most LitRPG you will read, and brings another dimension to the genre. Explicit language! I will not lie, there is a satirical nature to this story, and a lot of the language and scenarios are morally questionable on purpose. In this story and I use a lot of curse words and controversial commentary. Just look on Facebook or any half a dozen social media sites, and you will see similar language, conversations, and other nonsense. If we all moved into a digital world, this is how I view that world.

    It was lust at first sight, and Rhapsody isn't going to let young Malcolm leave her presence without a promise to fulfill her fantasy.Malcolm had no idea when he accepted Rhapsody's invitation to her bedroom that he was selling his soul to the devil. Malcolm thinks he can bed Rhapsody and simply walk away, but she is not one to settle for a one night stand. Rhapsody goes to desperate measures to keep her cub extremely close to her. Gifting Malcolm a very expensive SUV, filling his belly with home cooked meals and funding a trip to Cancun are just a few of the tactics that Rhapsody uses to ensure that Malcolm spends his nights in her bed and no one else's. However, when Rhapsody finds a mysterious package on her doorstep containing proof of Malcolm's betrayal and deception, she seeks revenge and seals her own fate.

    Simplest thing in the world to send for mail-order brides - minimum of fuss, only a marginal expense, and everyone's happy with the end result. Jack Milton agrees with Sully's reasoning and agrees to be one of the grooms. When he meets his prospective bride, he's more than pleased with the match - but that's short-lived when the girls arrive at the ranch. Wynonna Westcott and her friends agreed to become mail-order brides only after signing some very specific contracts and receiving guarantees of their happiness. When things turn out to be the exact opposite of what they've been promised, they must figure out their next step - or be stranded in Kansas forever. This is book one of a new comedic sweet Western romance series by popular author Amelia C. Adams.