He is going to change the face of British comedy.Unfortunately for the residents of north London, he's going to finance this dream by becoming a gardener.The result is The Day Job, an account of a year spent working in other people's gardens: people like Mrs Fleming who is convinced there is buried treasure in the bottom bed; Mr Walters who is trying to create a fascist state policed by gnomes in his well-guarded plot in Gospel Oak; Mrs Glover who is probably the most attractive woman living in Britain; and poor Mr Nugent, who likes to save his urine in jam jars and pour it over his compost.Over four seasons Wallington crosses Hampstead Heath from job to job. He survives brushes with the evil contract gardeners who keep trying to knock him off his bicycle. He strives to impress literary agent Herman Gapp who might represent him - depending on what sort of job he does on Gapp's Alpine Terrace. He even finds time to fall for a housecleaner-cum-actor named Helen, as he becomes part of a strange band of artistes, each with a day job of their own, all waiting for that first break.This is the story of long nights spent in the back room of a pub trying to write unsolicited scripts, and of much longer days spent trying to understand the British and their strange obsession with gardening.

    Both are pretty easy to put off as they're very expensive and tend to wreck your house.' Stand-up comedian Sam Avery (aka the Learner Parent) started his award-winning blog when his twin boys were born. A million nappies, Peppa Pig episodes and a lot less sleep later, he shares all the lows, highs and hilarious in-betweens of his experiences of first-time parenthood in this, his highly anticipated first book. Sam's honest, messy and laugh-out-loud account of trying for a baby (which transpired to be babIES) and figuring out what to do with them once they arrived - right up to the toddler years of talking, walking and tantrum-ing - will have you crying with laughter between your own nappy changes and nursery runs.

    He had a solid job. He ran 5Ks for charity. He was living a nice, safe Midwestern existence. And then his wife left him for a handsome paramedic down the street.We’re All Damaged begins after Andy has lost his job, ruined his best friend’s wedding, and moved to New York City, where he lives in a tiny apartment with an angry cat named Jeter that isn’t technically his. But before long he needs to go back to Omaha to say good-bye to his dying grandfather.Back home, Andy is confronted with his past, which includes his ex, his ex’s new boyfriend, his right-wing talk-radio-host mother, his parents’ crumbling marriage, and his still-angry best friend.As if these old problems weren’t enough, Andy encounters an entirely new complication: Daisy. She has fifteen tattoos, no job, and her own difficult past. But she claims she is the only person who can help Andy be happy again, if only she weren’t hiding a huge secret that will mess things up even more. Andy Carter needs a second chance at life, and Daisy—and the person Daisy pushes Andy to become—may be his last chance to set things right.

    Sue VerSteeg...Most women have them: those two very distinct, very different voices in their mind. One can usually be chalked up to common sense, the other to mischief, mayhem or just plain morbid curiosity. Both are always there, though, ready with their two cents worth.Jemma Keith is no exception to the rule. She doesn't have a problem agreeing to photograph her cheating ex-boyfriend's wedding. The dilemma, however, is what to do once she gets there. Common sense feels like taking the high road; she can handle being the better person. Mischief wants to slither in, crashing the whole affair down around his worthless ankles.What's a woman to do when she can't make up her mind?At least both sides are in complete harmony about the bride's cousin, Anthony Giovanni: he's hot, handsome, and oh, so tempting.Join Jemma as she weaves through a web of lust, temptation, revenge, and maybe even love.

    There were 65 blocks on each floor, so in all the four floors had 260 blocks, all the members from each and every block started running towards Ramakant Laghate's residence. Since many years, nothing so exciting had happened in the building and there was no possibility of anything exciting happening in the near future. This is a peculiarity of Va Pu's stories; they start with a shock and give us another one at the end, the story it self at its height throughout the book. Every common man feels that something exciting should happen in his or her life. With this as a clue, Va Pu has cleverly woven the stories. Each and every story has a very special plot, which further heightens the suspense making it exciting as well and gives a shock at the end. Why do we get so engulfed in all those stories? Answer is simple. It is Va Pu's natural, heart-to-heart, and yet naughty style and the freshness of the topics

    Taking listeners behind the scenes of his research, Swanson discusses the origins of his boyhood passion for Lincoln, including his first visits to Springfield, Illinois, and Ford’s Theatre as a high school student; accounts for Booth’s movements during the manhunt; reveals how he authenticates Lincoln blood relics; and offers details about historic sites that remain little-known or obscure. Swanson describes the intrigue he continues to pursue - the women who aided Booth, lingering questions regarding other conspirators, and a timeline for both Lincoln and the conspirators on the night of April 14, 1865. The Lincoln Obsession is a uniquely personal look at how historical places and relics will forever shed new light on the first presidential assassination in America.

    It's to do with bikes. They're everywhere. And so are their riders. Some of these riders seem to be sporting sideburns and a few of them are winning things. Big things. Now Ned wants to know how on earth it came to this. And what, exactly is 'this'.In On the Road Bike, Ned Boulting asks how Britain became so obsessed with cycling. Ned's search puts him in contact with some of the wonderful and wonderfully idiosyncratic people who have contributed to this nation's two-wheeled history. It's a journey that takes him from the velodrome at Herne Hill to the Tour of Britain at Stoke-on-Trent via Bradley Wiggins, Chris Boardman, David Millar (and David's mum), Ken Livingstone, both Tommy Godwins, Gary Kemp (yes, him from Spandau Ballet) and many, many more. The result is an amusing and personal exploration of the austere, nutty soul of British cycling.

     Get the first five books in the Zion Sawyer Cozy Mystery series in one box set: Cappuccino, Café Au Lait, Espresso, Caffe Macchiato and Americano. Almost 1,000 pages of mystery and intrigue in everyone’s favorite tourist town all in one volume. Follow Zion, Tate, and the other quirky residents of Sequoia as they solve mysteries, while getting their favorite brew at the Caffeinator.

    His fleeting fame as the drummer for a one-hit wonder rock band is nearly a decade behind him. His ex-wife is about to marry a terrific guy. And his Princeton-bound teenage daughter Casey has just confided in him that she’s pregnant—because Silver is the one she cares least about letting down.So when Silver learns that he requires emergency life-saving heart surgery, he makes the radical decision to refuse the operation, choosing instead to spend what time he has left to repair his relationship with Casey, become a better man, and live in the moment—even if that moment isn’t going to last very long. As his exasperated family looks on, Silver grapples with the ultimate question of whether or not his own life is worth saving.

    HEY, U UP? tackles all the milestones of relationships today—both glorious and embarrassing— with sections ranging from “How to Ask Someone Out After You’ve Slept with Them” all the way to “Establish Your Family as the Christmas Family by Turning Your Significant Other Against Their Own Parents.” In addition to the laugh-out-loud essays, lists, questionnaires, and even flowcharts further enliven the pages.

    From the author of the bestselling true-crime classic 'Fred & Rose', comes the astonishing inside story of the world's biggest cash robbery: the Tonbridge Securitas heist.

    It’s going to take a woman’s courage to find a new beginning…One night, after her father gambles everything away, Evie and her family are forced to do a moonlight flit. It’s a fresh start in the South, where no-one knows their name, and Evie desperately misses all they’ve left behind. Yet Evie’s troubles are just beginning. Her mother, worn down by life, deserts them for a new man, and with her grandmother’s sight failing, Evie must carry the burden of earning their keep. Holding the family together becomes harder when tragedy strikes at its heart, but there is hope on the horizon . . .Evie Carter just needs the courage to change the fortunes of her family.

    Now it’s time to return the favor. The massive Mozari spaceship struck without warning. In an instant major cities were leveled. Millions were wiped from the face of the Earth. The horrifying message to those remaining—your training starts now. Pods scattered across the globe are filled with strange, alien wares and scientists of all backgrounds must come together to harness the advanced technology in a race to discover its secrets before the one-year deadline. And before their experiments with the exo suits kill another soldier. Few possess the rare antibodies needed to control the Mozari armor. But Daniel West soon discovers he’s one of the civilians selected to be fitted and trained to use the suit. Instead of following in his family’s footsteps, he joins the military and is assigned to a team on a mission to the Mozari ship. But when tragedy strikes his team, he must take command of a mission into enemy territory that promises nothing less than certain death. What they discover on the ship changes everything. This novel contains violence and profanity.

    Because even though it sounds like you're calling your friend a weirdo, this book is in fact a wonderfully astute and affectionate look at the female psyche, and perfect for any girl with a sense of humor (and a desire to know what boys think of girls). With his unique Homer-Simpson-channeled-through-Jessica-Simpson sensibility, Todd Harris Goldman—that Todd Harris Goldman, the funny, crude, un-PC, very savvy author of Boys Are Stupid, Throw Rocks at Them!—explains why boys think the opposite sex is weird. Narrated by a boy who's sort of a moron, it questions all the things that are completely alien to boys, but with a surprisingly sweet insight and great good spirit. Waxing vs. shaving. The color pink. Shoe obsessions. The everyday dilemma: "Does this dress make me look fat?" The appeal of tiny little dogs. Fake boobs. The mysteries of PMS. In the end he can only conclude that girls are weirdos and leave it at that—a conclusion that girls will not only understand but own up to proudly.

    We’re judged by social media’s faceless masses, pressured into maintaining a Pinterest-perfect home, and expected to base our self-worth on retweets, faves, likes, and followers. Our collective FOMO, and the disparity between the ideal and reality, is leading us to spend more and feel worse. No wonder we’re getting twitchy. Save for an Independence Day–style alien invasion, how do we begin to escape from the stressors that make up our days?Jen Lancaster is here to take a hard look at our elevating anxieties, and with self-deprecating wit and levelheaded wisdom, she charts a path out of the quagmire that keeps us frightened of the future and ashamed of our imperfectly perfect human lives. Take a deep breath, and her advice, and you just might get through a holiday dinner without wanting to disown your uncle.