A deadly pandemic throttles the globe. Democracy has crumbled. Armed gangs of militant protestors stalk the streets. Amidst this waking nightmare, a new horror develops. The virus is mutating.Dan Lewis's wife is sick. When he receives a call from the hospital, he's prepared for the worst. Or so he thought. Because that call plunges Dan into an unending spiral of insanity and depravity. Now, he must fight his way through the battle-scarred streets of New York City to find his wife, unprepared for what awaits him out there...in the shadows.Grim and terrifying, but laced with gallows humor and surprising heart, THE BLOOD BEAST MUTATIONS is an all-too-relatable story of courage and gruesome horror.

    Incomprehensible horrors from beyond are going to devour our world but that’s no excuse to get all emotional about it. Morag Murray works for the secret government organisation responsible for making sure the apocalypse goes as smoothly and as quietly as possible. In her first week on the job, Morag has to hunt down a man-eating starfish, solve a supernatural murder and, if she’s got time, prevent her own inevitable death. The first book in a new comedy series by the creators of ‘Clovenhoof’, Oddjobs is a sideswipe at the world of work and a fantastical adventure featuring amphibian wannabe gangstas, mad old cat ladies, ancient gods, apocalyptic scrabble, fish porn, telepathic curry and, possibly, the end of the world before the weekend.

    How did he get here? From the vantage point of his prison cell, Toby pens his memoir, trying to piece together how he fell so far, all the while fielding the uninvited literary opinions of his murderous cellmate, Gary.What Toby unspools is a tale of twisted bureaucracy, public servants gone rogue, and the ever-present pervasive stench of rotting prawns (don't ask). Realizing that his political career is far from the noble endeavor he'd once imagined it would be, Toby makes a bid for freedom...before the terrible realization dawns: it's impossible to get fired from the public service. Refusing to give up (or have to pay for his relocation fee), Toby's attempts to get fired grow more and more extreme, and he finds himself being propelled higher and higher through the ranks of bureaucracy.

    Multi-dimensional swashbuckling would be hard enough, but our two unfortunate souls broke up a week ago.Can friendship blossom from the ashes of a relationship? In infinite dimensions, all things are possible.

    She has a first-kiss tree and a broken-arm tree. She has a car-accident tree. There is a tree at the hospital where Jackie’s mother passed away into the long good night. When one of them gets cut down, Jackie doesn’t know what to do but she doesn’t let that stop her. She picks up the biggest rock she can carry and puts it through the window of a car. Smash. She intends to leave before the police arrive, but they’re early. Ann is Jackie’s best friend, but she’s got problems of her own. Her mother is chained up in the basement. How do you bring that up in casual conversation? “Oh, sorry I’ve been so distant, Jackie. My mother has more teeth than she’s supposed to, and she won’t eat anything that’s already dead.” Ann and her sister Margaret don’t have much of a choice here. Their mother needs to be fed. It isn’t easy but this is family. It’s not supposed to be easy. It’ll be okay as long as Margaret and Ann still have each other. Add in a cantankerous old man, his powerfully stupid dog, a headless ghost, a lesbian crush and a few unsettling visits from Jackie’s own dead mother, and you’ll find that One Bloody Thing After Another is a different sort of horror novel from the ones you’re used to. It’s as sad and funny as it is frightening, and it is as much about the way families rely on each other as it is about blood being drooled on the carpet. Though, to be honest, there is a lot of blood being drooled on the carpet.

    Be careful what you wish for...When a lowly antiques dealer who's in love with the governor's girlfriend releases a genie from a magic lamp, he unwittingly wishes himself into a hole the size of the Grand Canyon!

    Sheltered by her overbearing father, Louisa has years of catching up to do and can think of no better person than gorgeous Sam Rawlins to show her. Is she ready for the time of her life? Hell, yes.Ordinarily unflappable adventure guide Sam Rawlins makes his living showing the wealthy how to have fun, but nothing in his experience could have prepared him for the "adventure" Louisa Honeycut asks for. He might be showing Louisa the time of her life, but the quirky little snack-cake heiress is soon turning Sam's own life upside down...and perversely, he likes the new vantage point.

    Why?Her sister is marrying Bobby's brother.She's trussed up in a bridesmaid dress that must have been designed originally as a Victorian Torture Chamber.To teach them a lesson, she and Bobby have been assigned to the Kiddie Table.And that's only the beginning...

    After their appearance on The Kayla Mangrabler talk show, they decided to go their separate ways and cause as much havoc as possible.  Jesus has been stuck at the craps table for three days, sipping vodka and Red Bull, completely missing the end of the world. But he is about to meet up with Death and go on a road trip that will test their resolve and their blood alcohol content. Meanwhile, an unlikely band of heroes are headed to Las Vegas to fight the Apocalypse. Creepy Chuzz and his one-armed, addict monkey Phil are flying there in an ice cream truck. Chuzz's best friend Leon plans to lend a hand, assuming he can escape the clutches of the insane Father Maniwhore not to mention Pestilence, who has designs on the janitor's bathtub-LSD-addled brain. Along the way they will encounter bouncing glory hole boxes, militant lesbians, an undead general, a flying demon named Princess Sally, hordes of zombies, and a trio of secret agents hellbent on delivering a Cease and Desist order to Lucifer himself. They'd better hurry, because the Devil is rising in the desert, and he is hungry to start the Apocalypse that his son could not. But only if he can get it on with his giant floating glory hole.

    Their mission: hunt down and destroy the real William Shatner. Featuring: Captain Kirk, TJ Hooker, Denny Crane, Priceline Shatner, Cartoon Kirk, Rescue 9-1-1 Shatner, singer Shatner, and many more. No costumed con-goer will be spared in their wave of destruction, no red shirt will make it out alive, and not even the Klingons will be able to stand up to a deranged Captain Kirk with a light saber. But these Shatner- clones are about to learn a hard lesson . . . that the real William Shatner doesn't take crap from anybody. Not even himself.

    People are turning into clowns. Society isn’t interested in finding a cure or treating the infected as humans. But when unconventional couriers begin to harass the contaminated, and clowns start disappearing, a band of transformed coworkers set out to find answers.

    Carly, an unassuming receptionist at Guru Fashion Agency, is shocked when sexy new guy Jake texts her to say he needs her help—fighting off zombie models! Soon she discovers New York is under siege and she’s the chosen one who can save them all. With the help of her sassy, donut-loving deskmate Joyce and the intriguing Jake, Carly embarks on a death-defying adventure that leads to a Fashion Week showdown with the Queen of the Zombies, one of the industry’s biggest icons. It just might be the strangest first date she’s ever had.

    Hamilton Beckett, the catch of the season. The only problem? She's never actually met Hamilton. Fortunately, one of her oldest and dearest friends, Mr. Henry St. James—who has returned to New York after a two-year absence—does know Hamilton. Much to Henry's chagrin, Charlotte immediately ropes him into helping her meet Hamilton. However, none of her plans to catch Hamilton's eye go as she expected, and she is even more confused when her old feelings for Henry begin to resurrect themselves. In the midst of the mayhem Charlotte always seems to cause, she wonders if the gentleman of her dreams might be an entirely different man than she thought.

    Abigail hopes that her birthday will slip by unnoticed and uncelebrated, but her employer, detective of the supernatural R. F. Jackaby, has other plans. Using magical party crackers that teleport the pair to unknown destinations in time and space and a cryptic map that may lead to a forgotten treasure, Jackaby intends to give Abigail what he considers to be the best gift of all--adventure. Abigail and Jackaby must tame an enormous (and carnivorous) rabbit, defend a castle, and master a dirigible if they want to find the treasure and get back to New Fiddleham alive.

    in this e-book collaboration between Stephen King and Joe Hill.In the Tall Grass begins with a sister and brother who pull off to the side of the road after hearing a young boy crying for help from beyond the tall grass. Within minutes they are disoriented, in deeper than seems possible, and they’ve lost one another. The boy’s cries are more and more desperate. What follows is a terrifying, entertaining, and masterfully told tale, as only Stephen King and Joe Hill can deliver.In the Tall Grass was originally published in two parts in the June/July and August 2012 issues of Esquire magazine. This is their second collaboration since the novella Throttle, published in 2009.