For that reason, the pictures I request of those who wish to apply are explicit. The full prerequisites are attached to the correspondence. If you aren’t comfortable with these demands, don’t bother applying."Ella applies, seeing straight through the bullshit; she goes as far as derisivly add a set of pictures fitting the requirements the letter demands:A picture of her "pussy" - a fat, indolent persian - and of her in her nightwear - yoga pants and a hoodie.In lieu of an introduction, her message reads:« Dear Daniel Franko Phillipe Del Luz,I’ve applied to guarantee that I’m not summoned to your little orgy.Fuck you. We aren’t all stupid.Ella. »It was supposed to go through an automated system;she didn't expect anyone to read it...Let alone the King

    How would their stories unfold after the wedding bells stopped ringing? Set in a fictional realm based on New York City, DESPERATELY EVER AFTER sprinkles women’s fiction with elements of fantasy, and encourages readers to rethink everything they know about happy endings. Years after turning her husband from beast back to man and becoming his queen, Belle finds out she’s finally going to have a child. But before she can announce the wondrous news, she catches him cheating and watches her “happily ever after” go up in flames. Turning to her friends for the strength to land with grace, she realizes she’s not the only one at a crossroads: Cinderella, a mother of four drowning in royal duties, is facing her 30th birthday and questioning everything she’s done (or hasn’t) with her life. Rapunzel, a sex-crazed socialite and one-woman powerhouse, is on a self-destructive quest to make up for 20 years locked away in a tower. Penelopea, an outsider with a mother-in-law from hell, is harboring a secret that could ruin everything at any moment. One part Sex and the City, two parts Desperate Housewives, and three parts Brothers Grimm, DESPERATELY EVER AFTER picks up where the original tales left off—and reimagines them a la Gregory Maguire’s Wicked. With the wit of authors like Jennifer Weiner and the vision of ABC’s Once Upon a Time, the women of DESPERATELY EVER AFTER rescue each other from life’s trials with laughter, wine, and a scandalous new take on happily ever after.Press:“Laura Kenyon makes happily ever after desperately delicious!” ~ Stephanie Evanovich, New York Times bestselling author.“If you are looking for a fun and gossipy story to satisfy the holes left when Sex and the City and Desperate Housewives had their series finales (or even if you’re going through Once Upon a Time withdrawal come season finale time) look no further than Desperately Ever After.” ~ Chick Lit Central“An explosive cocktail that will have you laughing out loud and wanting more and more!” ~ Lost in Chick Lit“Kenyon’s colorful imagery and often quick, lighthearted style makes it easy to keep flipping pages.” ~ The New Canaan Advertiser“This book is hilarious, sweet, and ingenious.” ~ WordsWisdomWhitney“Laura Kenyon’s Desperately Ever After is part Disney princess, part Sex in the City, and part TMZ Celebrity Gossip Site … and it’s fabulous!” ~ Kristy Feltenberger Gillespie, Keep Calm and Write On“There are misunderstandings, secrets kept that should be shared (and vice versa), silly situations and reconciliations a-plenty, so summarizing the rest of the story would be no easy task and, besides, it would take away the fun of reading it.” ~ Girls Love to Read (formerly Chick Lit Reviews and News)“It’s sarcastic, it’s flirty, it’s cheeky, it’s hilarious! Laura gave those girls and their stories such an interesting, contemporary spin with some magic and lots of humor. I couldn’t stop reading and my cheeks hurt from grinning.” ~ Guest post from Maryline at Jenny in Neverland

    Well, at least not the hearts and flowers, see-your-soulmate-across-a-crowded-room-and-the-world-stands-still kind of love. No, Emily is a pragmatist and she’s abandoned her family’s tradition of matchmaking based on instinct and uncanny intuition for a more scientific approach to pairing people up. Emily believes love is more about compatibility and common interests than anything mystical.But a run-of-the-mill job turns her world on end when swoony cake designer Sam Cavanaugh pops up as a potential match for her newest client. The attraction she feels for him throws a wrench in her plans, but Emily’s not giving in without a fight.Emily is nothing if not practical. And reasonable. But she’s about to learn that sometimes the sweetest things in life…are neither.

    In Outta the Bag, Clive Better—the better-than-best plumber in town—attends a speed dating event where—instead of attempting to score phone numbers—he recounts his recent run-in with a freaked-out cat and a sexy-but-psychotic woman that has left him confused, scratched up, and rather aroused.

    Sort of."It was his pheromones that did it. With one sniff, sex researcher Leigh Fromm recognizes that any offspring she might have with the mysterious stranger would have a better-than-average chance of surviving any number of impending pandemics.But when Leigh finds out that the handsome “someone” at her great aunt’s wake is Prince Roman Habsburg von Lorraine of Austria, she suddenly doubts her instincts—not that she was intending to sleep with the guy. The royal house of Habsburg was once completely inbred, insanity and impotency among the highlights of their genetic pedigree. (The extreme “bulldog underbite” that plagued them wasn’t called the Habsburg Jaw for nothing.)It doesn’t matter that his family hasn’t sat on a throne (other than the ones in their Toilette) since 1918, or that Austria is now a parliamentary democracy. Their lives couldn’t be more different: Roman is routinely mobbed by paparazzi in Europe. Leigh is regularly mocked for having the social skills of a potted plant. Even if she suddenly developed grace, charm and a pedigree that would withstand the scrutiny of the press and his family, what exactly is she supposed to do with this would-have-been king of Austria who is in self-imposed exile in Denver, Colorado?

    Instead of finishing med school to become a doctor, she chooses a different path and raises money for hospitals – new wings, equipment, whatever they need. Except there is one hospital she would be happy to never set foot in again--her fathers. So of course he hires her to create a gala for his sixty-fifth birthday. Charity can’t say no. Now she is working in the one place she doesn’t want to be. Except she’s attracted to Dr. Elijah Bennet, the handsome playboy chief. Will she ever prove to her father that’s she’s more than a med school dropout? Or will her attraction to Elijah keep her from repairing the one thing she desperately wants to fix? ** This is NOT erotica. It's Romance and a love story. ** * This is a two book series: Part 1 and Part 2 * )

    Every night after her depressing bureaucratic job (so much for saving the world), after coming home to her empty apartment Clara settles down with a pint of ice cream for some good, old-fashioned Facebook stalking. It’s her college boyfriend, The One Who Got Away. He now has a perfect marriage, perfect house, perfect life—everything she could have had if she hadn’t been so, so stupid. But, wait. Jeanie from Facebook shows up at Clara’s job. There’s a new app they’re beta-testing and Clara’s perfect for it. That night she clicks on it and… nothing happens. But the next morning when Clara wakes up at noon, hung over, listening to her roommate blow-drying her hair and singing “Gettin’ Jiggy Wit It”, she realizes she’s back in college. With the chance to do it all over again. Back in the world of frat parties, BFFs, and long-suffering, overlooked lab partners, join Clara as she discovers what it really means to hit the reset button on life. What could possibly go wrong? And, this time, can she get it right?

    A phone call interrupts their conversation, and she has to leave before she can find out anything about him--what his name is, where he's from, and why his smile is so familiar.Her wishes that they'll run into each other again come true, but not how she expects. When her older sister finally lets the family meet her new boyfriend, Samara is shocked to see it's the guy from the music store!Awkward and hilarious scenes abound as Samara tries -- in vain -- to undo the crush she'd formed earlier. Inspired by the film Dan in Real Life, this novella will tickle you pink.

     A lonely girl plots revenge in the shadow of a mountain. A stolen princess fumbles a century backward. A dwarfish man crafts brilliant automatons. A Polish Jew strikes matches against the Nazis. A dead girl haunts a crystal lake. A terrified princess searches a labyrinth. A rich collection of six historically inspired retellings, Once is a new generation of fairytales for those who thought they'd heard the tales in all their forms. Featuring the novellas of Elisabeth Grace Foley, Rachel Heffington, J Grace Pennington, Emily Ann Putzke, Suzannah Rowntree, and Hayden Wand.Titles in this book set:The Mountain of the Wolf by Elisabeth Grace FoleyShe But Sleepeth by Rachel HeffingtonRumpled by J. Grace PenningtonSweet Remembrance by Emily Ann PutzkeDeath Be Not Proud by Suzannah RowntreeWith Blossoms Gold by Hayden Wand

    Worse than that? She's broke. Her boyfriend recently left her, so she's stuck paying her hefty apartment rent alone. After two months unemployed, there's no money left. With no immediate family to turn to, Red reaches out to her estranged grandmother, a reclusive writer living on an island off the coast of Charleston. Several days later, Red receives $30,000 and an invitation to visit. James Wolfe is not Red's grandmother - but he's the only person waiting for her at the boat dock. Red has something he needs. He won't take "no" for an answer, and he doesn't mind screwing her over to get it. He lost his conscience six years ago, when he went off the grid. Since then, life is about him - and the renowned oil paintings he does under the mysterious pseudonym "W." Until the moment he sees her. Then Red is all he wants. And Wolfe will have her - any way he can. * This story is the first of three serials about Red & Wolfe. Red & Wolfe Part I was originally published in The BEND Anthology, a collection of stories from the authors of The Erotica Consortium.

    I like to think of them as poisoned apples. Once you taste them, you will never see fairy tales in the same light again. The Grimm Diaries Prequels are short books in the form of epistolary diary entries. They are teasers for The Grimm Diaries. The 6 diaries are told by The Evil Queen, Peter Pan, Little Red Riding Hood, the Devil, Prince Charming, and Alice Grimm.Grimm Diaries Prequels:1 Snow White Blood Red (narrated by The Snow White Queen)2 Ashes to Ashes and Cinder to Cinder (narrated by Alice Grimm)3 Beauty Never Dies (narrated by Peter Pan)4 Ladle Rotten Rat Hut (narrated by Little Red Riding Hood)5 Mary Mary Quite Contrary6 Blood Apples (narrated by Prince Charming)7 Jawigi (narrated by sandman Grimm)

    Joining single father Ben Hanson and his children for the holidays seems an easy enough task until Santa informs her that Ben is the man behind the disturbing new book 'Beyond Bah Humbug: Why Lying to Your Children about Santa Claus is a Bad Idea'.Posing as Miss Kane, the children's new nanny, Carol pulls out all the stops to show Ben how fun Christmas can be, all the while struggling to understand how one man could hate the holidays so much. How could she, Santa's only daughter, be so attracted to a man who refuses to believe her father exists?**Please note - this book was originally titled Carol's Christmas**

    What she has is a fiancé she never wanted and a compelling urge to run away. But if she manages to escape, will she find her happily ever after?

    Melissa (Mel), still ringless after dating the same man for six years, deserves the engagement ring charm. The red hot chili pepper would be perfect for Seema, who is in love with her best male friend Scott, but can't seem to make their relationship more than platonic. And recently laid off journalist Nic wants the shovel, which symbolizes hard work, to help her get her career back on track. Nic does everything she can to control who gets which silver keepsake - as well as the future it represents. But when the charmed cake is mysteriously shifted from the place settings Nic arranged around it, no one gets the charm she chose for them. And when the other party guests' fortunes begin coming true, Mel, Seema, and Nic can't help but wonder.... Is the cake trying to tell them something?

    He doesn’t want to be hurt again. But their attraction to each other is undeniable. Caroline’s job as personal assistant to billionaire Evelyn Sutton takes her to the family beach house on Palmer Island. She’s looking forward to a few quiet days getting the house ready. She didn’t expect to find her boss’s youngest son swimming in the pool. Pete Sutton plays the spoiled rich guy well. It affords him the privacy to do the charity work that’s important to him. He likes his mother’s PA too much for a quick fling, but dating anyone is out of the question. He’s still licking his wounds from his one and only serious relationship. Neither one of them is looking for love, but can they ignore the chemistry between them when they are stuck together on beautiful Palmar Island? This is a 20,000 word sweet romance novella with no cliff hangers and a HEA. it's the first of the Clean Beach Billionaire series.