Damn, now I sound stupid, too." -Bomani Jones, ESPN "It's great, and I have no idea what just happened, but Jerry Jones dick exploded and that's enough for me." -Spencer Hall, SB Nation "The only parody Twitter account worth following" -Deadspin.com "This is the least influential book of anything I've ever read. I hated it." -Adolf Hitler In what is being hailed by many, probably, as the best, funniest, most gut-shittingly poignant literary work since The New Testament, PFT Commenter takes you on a realistic-fiction journey through the backdoor politics of today's NFL. Set in the 2014 offseason, Roger Goodell and President Barack Obama become locked in a mano a mano battle over the future of the Dallas Cowboys, culminating in a literal fight to the death. Starring NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, Barack Obama, Mike Ditka, Joe Biden, Michael Vick, Peter King, Ron Jaworski, Dan Snyder, Robert Griffin III, Danny Woodhead, J.J. Watt, Jerry Jones, Russell Wilson, Pete Carroll, and many more of your favorite NFL stars and media personalities; "Goodell vs. Obama: The Battle for the Future of the NFL" will take you on a journey that any NFL fan is sure to love, or at least not hate. WARNING: Told through the narrative eye and screaming mouth of an uneducated internet commenter, this book is filled with grammatical errors. It was written by a someone who was raised on scorching hot sports takes, light beer, and an undying love for Roger Goodell. He cares about TELLING, not about spelling. If that's going to be a problem,, there's the door.

    This book is full of my best stories – kickabouts with jumpers for goalposts with Bobby Moore, mine and Sandra’s disastrous honeymoon to Torquay in a dodgy car and my funniest ‘Mr Pastry’ moments – as well as my thoughts on the important things in life. I’m finally sharing what I’ve learned on and off the pitch: from growing up poor in Poplar to the heights of the Premiership and even lying in a coffin with a load of rats on national television. It’s everything I know about true team spirit, hard work, tough times, why family are so important and why everyone deserves respect no matter whether they’re royal or sleeping rough – and, of course, the real joy of a jam roly-poly.'

    From humble beginnings in a barn in Pennsylvania to soaring victories in the French Alps, Team 7-Eleven is the complete history that has never been fully told-until now.

     Chloe Marks doesn't have time for love, and that's that. So why is it that when she needs it the least, two men who couldn't be more different crash into her life and spin everything on its head? With a career on the brink of disaster, the curvy sports agent has no time for trouble... even less so for double the trouble. Dante and Dominic Kenner are werebear twins that everybody knows. The hockey stars have bright futures ahead of themselves, just as long as they don't mess it up. But what's the fun in behaving? Especially when there's a woman they both want and cant have! Brotherly love might be a thing, but these two Alpha bears have never played fair, and Chloe is about to find out what happens when she's really wanted. Double Bear Trouble is a full-length menage romance with growly Alpha males, a curvy woman with plenty to prove, and twists and turns to keep you on your toes! There's no cheating, a HEA and a guaranteed happy ending!

    Joyce's year on the hockey beat is a steep learning curve for him; NHL scouts spend each season gathering information on players fighting it out to break into the world of professional hockey. They watch hundreds of games, speak to scores of players, parents, team-mates and other scouts, amassing profiles on all the top contenders. It's a form of risk assessment—is this young hopeful deserving of a multi-million dollar contract?—and it can be a tough and thankless task. Scouts are ground into the game, picking up nuances of play that even the most committed fan would miss, but they are looking at more than just how well a kid can play. And come the final draft, only a tiny percentage of their full year's work might matter.Examining the amount of information gathered on the under-eighteen hopefuls, the scrutiny to which they are subjected, and the differences between the rigour of American and Canadian junior teams, Joyce opens a window on the life and methods of an NHL scout and penetrates the mysterious world of scouting as no one has before.

    . . until Grandma intervenes. Nelly looks fabulous in her new swimsuit, so she wears it all the time--while riding her bike, playing basketball, eating at a fancy restaurant . . . even while sleeping.But Nelly refuses to wear it for swimming. Grandma, a swimming champion, has other ideas. Finally Nelly, dipping one toe at a time, learns to float, blow bubbles, kick . . . and is on her way to becoming a champion swimmer herself!

    The forces at play in the decade's battle for hockey supremacy-dazzling speed vs. brute force-are now, for better or worse, part of hockey's DNA. This book is a welcome reappraisal of the ten years that changed how the sport was played and experienced. Informed by first-hand interviews with players and game officials, and sprinkled with sidebars on the art and artifacts that defined Seventies hockey, the book brings dramatically alive hockey's most eventful years.

    But can this slow-movin' ice fixer smooth the grooves before the next period? Or will he lose his COOL? The timer's ticking! BUZZZZZZ!

    These were the days when the young Oilers, led by a teenaged Wayne Gretzky, were poised on the edge of greatness, and about to blaze their way into the record books and the consciousness of a nation. While the story of the early Oilers embodies the book, The Game of Our Lives is much more than a retelling of one season in the life of an NHL team.Unlike any book ever written in the annals of hockey, Gzowski beautifully weaves together the anatomy of a modern NHL team with the magnificent history of the game to create one of the best books about hockey in Canada. Here are the great teams and the great players through the ages—Morenz, Richard, Howe, Orr, Hull—the men whose rare and indefinable genius on the ice exemplified the speed, grit and innovation of the game.The Game of Our Lives is the best book on the Canadian passion for hockey; a wondrously perceptive account of the hold the game has on Canadians. —Jack Granatstein, The National Post

    But Jordan realizes the title carries with it a new-found sense of responsibility. He needs to be a leader if he wants the team to win it all this season, which means leaving behind his reputation as a partying ladies' man. Charlotte Stone is a best-selling author and Manhattan socialite who is sick of the city. She's determined to live somewhere different that doesn't include being a guest star on her mother's reality show. But places like London or Los Angeles would just be more of the same. Then she hears about a building renovation project in Detroit and decides a move to somewhere completely unexpected is exactly what she needs. What Charlotte doesn't need is another hockey player in her life. Two years ago, she dated the biggest pest in the league who ended up breaking her heart. So why is she trying to find excuses to see the all-star captain of the Pirates? And how did she become the only woman who could derail Jordan's plan to win it all?

    He never had good intentions with my heart from the beginning. Novah, Billie and Normani navigate through life with their heads held high despite their tumultuous relationships with the men they fathered kids with. Novah fell into love quickly with Carter. They were young. He was a rising NFL star and she was a popular video vixen. Years skate by and Novah realizes he isn’t the man she thought he was. After ending their love affair, she learns of their twin sons. Novah does the best she can to keep the peace. While the media makes her out to be the bitter, gold digging baby momma she takes it to the chin. For her sons, she will eat up any negative accusation the world has to say about her. Her only aspiration in life is to give her sons a good one. When Novah begins to stand up to Carter and his demanding ways things go left. He shows her a side of him that she’s never seen before and Novah is left with two choices. Turn another blind eye to his foul ways or finally expose him for the hateful person that he really is. Billie was born to model. It flowed through her being effortlessly. Billie only wanted two things in life. That was to model and be with Dreux. Dreux, however. wanted out of Detroit. He watched his brother fall victim to the streets and vowed to be different. Despite Billie’s love for him he left Detroit and attended college out of state. While being apart from Dreux, Billie found comfort with his cousin Malachi. Malachi was Billie’s yes man. Whatever she needed he was there to make it happen. Billie wasn’t attracted to him but was grateful for his presence. One lonely night Billie found herself in bed with Malachi. From that encounter, a child was created. Billie immediately regretted her decision to be with him and because she wanted nothing else from him Malachi turned bitter. Billie allowed for her broken heart over Dreux to lead her down a dangerous path. She partied more and ended up losing her son to Malachi. It was a mistake that he refused to let her live down. Now that Billie is better than ever and ready to get her son back Malachi is fighting her at every turn. Billie wants peace in her life but with Malachi constantly bringing her chaos she’s fearful that the old Billie might resurface and that’s the last thing she needs. Normani is young and full of life. While in her first year of college she met the popular DJ to the stars Tru. Tru was like a dream come true for her. The unattainable man that somehow wanted her and immediately she became engrossed by him. Without having to think about it she gave up school and allowed for her life to revolve around Tru. She became his biggest fan and after being together for a few years their daughter was born. Suddenly Normani began to see things in Tru that she hadn’t seen before. He was controlling, distant and selfish. Normani had only known two parents. She had an amazing childhood and wanted her daughter to have the same but Tru was making it hard for her to do so. When Normani’s childhood friend Azariah comes home for good and starts to garner her attention Tru takes notice. He makes big strides to show Normani that he is a changed man but for Normani it may be too late. This is a two-part series.

    This is the first time this novel has been available as an ebook and the first time it has been available outside the UK. Vernon Coleman is also the author of the bestseller Too Many Clubs and Not Enough Balls and the hugely successful bestselling Bilbury series. `As captain of my golf club I thought your book was a hoot.' - H.D. `An excellent and amusing story and I'm not even a golfer.' J.H. `Light hearted entertainment - very readable.' - Golf World `Thank you for providing me with hours of happy reading.' E.M. `Hugely enjoyable, in the best tradition of British comic writing.' Evening Chronicle `The scenario is tailor made or Vernon Coleman's light and amusing anecdotes about country life and pursuits. His fans will lap it up.' Sunday Independent Vernon Coleman has written over 100 books (many of which are now available as Kindle books on Amazon). His books have sold over two million copies in the UK in hardback and paperback and have been translated into 25 languages. His novel Mrs Caldicot's Cabbage War was turned into an award winning movie. What the readers say about Vernon Coleman and his books: Coleman is a very funny writer - This England Laugh out loud funny - Golf World He writes lucidly and wittily - Good Housekeeping Superstar - Independent on Sunday Vernon Coleman writes brilliant books - The Good Book Guide Compulsive reading - The Guardian etc etc For a list of books by Vernon Coleman please visit his author page on Amazon. For more information please visit www.vernoncoleman.com

    Live large. Love like there’s no tomorrow.Life rarely goes according to plan. Sometimes the unexpected is even better than we could have ever imagined …For as long as he can remember, Mason has wanted to pursue his dream of being a musician. He’s been chomping at the bit to jump into the industry for years, but his daddy has been holding him back, claiming that Mason still has some growing up to do. As far as Mason is concerned, he’s plenty grown, and just as talented and driven as his older brother Cash.Mason knows that he has what it takes to soar. He only needs his shot.Just when his life takes the turn he always wanted, love and life open up a new path of possibilities that could be even better than he imagined. If only Mason can summon the courage to embrace the unexpected.

    This hilarious 233 page full-color book contains over 400 of cartoonist, Chad Carpenter's latest comic creations. Consisting of anything animal, vegetable or mineral, but with a decidedly outdoorsy slant, this award-winning comic strip takes an offbeat view of the woodsy side of life. Find out for yourself why TUNDRA is one of the fastest-growing comic strips on the planet!