Only thing is, it's owned by a doll collector. The awkward intimacies of a little country inn provide the backdrop for this hilarious story from Augusten Burrough's new collection, Possible Side Effects.If you like the story, be sure to download the whole audiobook.

     Emily Atack was flung to fame at just 17, as Charlotte 'Big Jugs' Hinchcliffe in The Inbetweeners. Nearly ten years later, she won over the nation on I'm a Celebrity . . . Get Me out of Here! thanks to her hilarious impersonations and epic bravery during trials. While she was in the jungle, the country watched her go on a journey of self-acceptance and come out on top. Now Emily reveals the hilarious highs and the heartbreakinglows that rocked the years between. With astonishing courage and her trademark humour, she shares stories about her family, relationships, work life and love.Are We There Yet? is a warm, honest and funny book for anyone who has ever felt the need to break the mould to find out who they really are.

    After more than thirty years of being asked the same question—"Why don't you give us some good news for a change?"—veteran television news anchor Bruce Lindsay obliges us with humorous and heartwarming stories from the idyllic town that we believe we grew up in—or wished we did. Inspired from the stories found in real small-town newspapers, Bruce Lindsay introduces us to the down-to-earth, foible-filled characters from Parley's Grove—folks who can make the mundane mesmerizing and the absurd endearing. Warm, poignant, and always hilarious, these affectionate vignettes of small-town life will help you remember who you are and where you're from.

    

    But he and his fellow vampires Joy, Cynthia, and Ian have agreed to blend into human society. Inspired by superhero movies, one of few passions in his un-life, Alex decides to don a cape and start fighting bad guys. But his decision will have bigger consequences than he realizes—for himself and for everyone he wants to protect.From CHIP ZDARSKY and JASON LOO, the Eisner-winning team behind AFTERLIFT, THE ALL-NIGHTER is a story about found family and a new twist on superheroes!Part of the comiXology Originals line of exclusive digital content only available on comiXology and Kindle. Read for free as part of your subscription to comiXology Unlimited, Kindle Unlimited or Amazon Prime. Also available for purchase via comiXology and Kindle.

    Gary Handler has issues. His boss hates him, his mother hounds him, and his cat thinks he’s an idiot. But that’s okay because Gary’s got the perfect solution to all of life’s troubles: a porn site subscription and his right hand.Sadly, all habits grow old, even the fun ones. Gary soon finds himself at the doorstep of a creepy old pawn shop where he buys a used adult novelty toy to spice up his one-man sex life.Pity for him that it’s cursed by the angry spirits of all the “kids” he’s flushed down the toilet. Needless to say, hairy palms are about to become the least of his worries.----------Jack on, jack off ... with the Jacklight in book 2 of Shingles, the horror comedy series that’s not for those with faint hearts or weak bladders.

    All 97 counties of it! Surely it can't be as bad as everyone tells him. After twenty years living abroad, he thinks the time is right to search his homeland for the best of British using new eyes, those of a foreign tourist, and in the only way he knows how – by bicycle. Armed with a list of recommendations gathered from friends and strangers alike and the most spontaneous of routes, he pedals 5,000 miles through damp English country lanes, soggy Welsh moorland and windswept Scottish mountains. He gets wet quite often. Following on from the success and irreverent style of both No Place Like Home, Thank God and Hungry for Miles, Steven seeks out the quirky in the people he meets, the places he visits and the food he eats. Can his initial store of positivity survive the journey, or will it be ground down by the traffic, the weather and his British, vegetable-free diet of beer, pies and pork scratchings? In this, Book 1, The Journey South, Steven travels from Merseyside to Warwickshire, through the whole of Wales, the West Country, the south coast and to London. Armed with a bag of googly eyes, he meets a poetry-prescribing nurse, stumbles across Hilda Ogden's lawnmower, has his footwear stolen by foxes, discovers some very special Mexican fleas, crashes the TARDIS and visits dozens of British capitals, including its infidelity capital, its boob job capital and its dogging capital. He experiences "real" Britain – the good and the bad – its Morris dancers, pie 'n' mash and the pinnacle of British culture, a good old-fashioned street fight. The concluding part, The Journey North, covering the east of England, Scotland and the north-west of England will be available in Summer 2017.

    This drawing guide is made with easy to follow, step by step instructions that will teach you how to create beautiful works of art! Add your own spin to these awesome characters and make them your own. Please note that we are not associated or affiliated with Five Nights at Freddy's or its creator. This is an unofficial book

    It’s all right here in these words. Everything you ever need to know. That’s because I use all twenty-six letters, and you can make anything out of those twenty-six letters. So, you see, this book encompasses everything." — PleaseHelpMeRumored to be penned by the brother of the best-selling author of “I Wrote This For You,” this new tour de force in poetry is sure to stab at your heart, or, at least, make you want to.If you loved the international best-selling collection of poetry, “I Wrote This For You,” you’ll probably hate this. But even those admirers of the free-verse artistry of that work will get a laugh from this classic parody. Author and screenwriter Edward Savio put together a spot-on send up of the poetry best-seller with “I Wrote This Crap For You.”It’s a quick, fun read that we hope you enjoy.“It touched my heart and moved me to tears.”“It’s as if he knew my inner thoughts and fears, and—come to think of it my diary is missing.”

    First Lady Destiny Simms is hosting a NYE’s service at her church and invites Ashley, who she met by barging into her home during the Thanksgiving holiday. With nothing else to do, she decides to go.  It was there that she was inspired to make 2020 the best year of her life.  What she didn't expect is to run into Patrick Need. He looked different, or was he always that handsome? In this holiday short, Ashley is determined to lay the foundation of a promising year.  Will she allow fear to overpower her faith another year? Is she worthy of love after her divorce? Find out in "A New Year's Kiss"  This is a short story, so short that you can finish it one sitting. If you aren’t interested in reading a short, please do not download. Happy New Year from NAKO!

    Not just once or twice, but seven dozen times. Each death a new demise, from the comic to the grim to the absurd to the transcendent and back again. With text by Jesse Ball and Brian Evenson complimented by Lilli Carré's macabre, gravestone-rubbing-style art, Henry King's ends are brought to a vivid life.

    easy. Especially a busy Christmas season. Parties, kids, decorations, kids, pictures, kids, vacation, kids. It's going to take every single adult in Polly's house to pull off a successful holiday. Fortunately, they're up to the task. Doug Randall is still fretting over what to do with his future. He enlists Polly and Henry's help when he comes up with another great idea. He doesn't want Polly to find a body in the building they investigate, but a mystery emerges when he peels wallpaper away from a gigantic painting. Bellingwood's history hasn't given up all its secrets yet and the latest spooky tale stirs memories that had been long-forgotten. Henry's sister, Lonnie, remembers going to the library on her way home from school simply to avoid the old building and she didn't even know the whole story. Once she found out, the creepy factor made more sense. Everything is wrapped up in the joy and excitement of the season. There is nothing quite as wonderful as sharing the holiday with your friends.

    trip to the Smithsonian's National Zoo. But when Lassie and Murdock tag along, everything goes haywire....3:39 a.m. "The Bachelor Party" (The Lassie Files Book 4)Just a few weeks before his wedding, Henry is shocked when he wakes up at the MGM National Harbor for a surprise bachelor party. And if Henry's father, Lassie, and Murdock have anything to say about it, it will be an "hour" that Henry will never forget...even if he wants to...Praise for The Lassie Files:Cat + dog = Henry's crazy night! -Cire6407Man, this is hilarious! It's short and easy to read in one sitting (or laying in my case), but you will find yourself, literally LOL! Gee, I think everyone would love this book! Can hardly wait for the next one in the series! -Louise PledgeI was already a big Nick Pirog fan before reading 3:06 am the Lassie Files so I was fully prepared to like the book. Was NOT prepared to just fall head over heels in love with it, but I did! I love the cat, the dog, the main character, his dad....every single thing about the book! It's funny, heartwarming (as are all Nick's books) and unforgettable. -Amazon CustomerGreat read! Really funny! Lassie is the best! Its a short book but I could not put it down till I was finished. As always Nick Pirog's sense of humor keeps you laughing. The 2 new friends of Lassie are great. I think we have all been there with a dog...you'll see. Can't want to the next Lassie story. -Kristina Masi

    10 Stories of Love, Faith, and Family "Like Amish soup for the soul."From the author of the bestselling Amish romance series Forbidden Amish Love comes Amish Neighbors, a short story romance collection from the heart.Ten stories under one cover.