i really mean it! IF YOU ARE EASILY OFFENDED AND BELONG TO ONE OF THE FOLLOWING GROUPS, PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS BOOK: SCOTTISH, WELSH, NORTHERN IRISH, IRISH CATHOLICS, COCKNEYS, CHAVS, UPPER CLASS ENGLISH TWATS, RELIGIOUS CHRISTIANS, MUSLIMS, JEWS, HOMOSEXUALS, RESIDENTS OF WATFORD, THE ACTOR ROBERT CARLYLE, THE WORKING CLASSES, THE UNEMPLOYED PUB GOING DOLE SCROUNGERS, THE AUTHOR'S FRIEND DANIEL SKELTON, REPUBLICAN AMERICANS, SOUTHERN STATES AMERICANS, CHRISTIAN MIDWEST AMERICANS WITH TRADITIONAL VALUES, ANY AMERICAN, TRANSVESTITES, SUPPORTERS OF THE ENGLAND FOOTBALL SQUAD, IRANIANS, EX PRESIDENT OF IRAN MAHMOUD AHMADINEJAD, SYRIANS, BASHAR AL ASSAD, WAYNE ROONEY, BELGIUMS, AGATHA CHRISTIE, THE FRENCH, YAHOO MESSAGE BOARD COMMENTATORS, SOUTH AMERICAN CRIME CARTELS, PRIESTS AND REVERENDS, THE WRITER OF THIS BOOK, PALESTINIANS, ARABS IN GENERAL, OLD YIDDISH MEN, THE FICTIONAL OLLAWONGA TRIBE OF DARKEST AFRICA, THE WRITER AND READERS OF FIFTY SHADES OF GREY, THE CHINESE AND TONY BLAIR. IF YOU BELONG TO ONE OF THE FOLLOWING GROUPS WHO HAVE HAD A MORE THAN CAMEO MENTION/APPEARANCE IN THE NOVEL, PLEASE READ THE BOOK WITHOUT FEAR OF OFFENSIVE STEREOTYPING: ITALIANS. If you have got this far, then allow me to enlighten you about a secret so great that the general public has no idea about but every government in the world knows and they are involved in a consistent cover up to keep the horrors from you.. What are the Ethereals? Some say they are the personifications of iconic and stereotypical energies given life by our collective beliefs and imagination. Others say they started as humans and evolved for much the same reasons given above. Both viewpoints have a basis in truth. A decade ago one of the most fearsome of these beings 'The Englishman,' was banished from our plane of existence by a weeping Tony Blair who cut the throat of a small child in a necromantic energy ritual to do so. With such a price paid, the question has to be asked ... just how serious a threat has arisen from the Ethereal world that the British government's only option is to bring back the Englishman to save us!!!! Set in 2012 in the lead up to the US election ... welcome to the twisted world of Mad Dog and The Englishman. WARNING: The following piece of hack work contains levels of swearing, depraved activity and violent situations sufficient enough to have Jihadi John puking up his guts.

    

    Communicating across the millennia, he and girlfriend Tori Morris, must battle with sinister forces to uncover a megalomaniac's plot to control the world with stolen time travel technology.

    With no way to make ends meet, she turns to the world of stripping in order to keep herself afloat. Jersey feels that she is simply existing, and finds nothing interesting about her life, until she meets Tommy Brownson. Tommy is cute, sweet, persistent, and patient. Jersey finds herself smitten with him, but soon after becomes just short of infatuated with his frenemy Kilexis Camren. Conflicted, Jersey is having a hard time figuring out if she wants the kind and gentle Tommy, after all he did approach her first, or the mysterious, rugged, and frank Kilexis. Not able to decide right away, Jersey dabbles with both, showing a much more favortism to the latter. Will she be able to pick in enough time to preserve the losing man's feelings? Or will fate choose for her, causing a heightened rivalry between the men? Cheyla Austin is a pill popping stripper, who has no idea where she wants to go in life, and to honest she's perfectly okay with that. Living life one day at a time, and having to answer to no one, has proved to be Cheyla's method for achieving contentment. She has no interest in dating anyone who may disrupt her easy going and detached life, until she meets the sexy, ambitious, and clever Kantwan Camren. Kantwan is a no nonsense guy, and refuses to be with a woman who will cower when met with true love or hardwork. Will Cheyla be able to mature into the woman Kantwan needs? Or will she continue to live life as a disconnected and afraid little girl, causing her to lose out on the man of every girl's dreams? Ivy Horne, hasn't had it easy for the past few years. With her child's father being thrown in jail for reckless petty robberies, she is forced to make sure her son has everything he needs. In order to put food into her son Donovan's mouth, she joins best friends Jersey and Cheyla, by dancing every night for cash. Her plan is to focus on making money, while looking for a new job to obtain before her man Portland comes home. In addition to that, there are no ifs, ands, or buts about her being faithful to Portland while put away. That all changes upon meeting the intelligent, handsome, and aggressive Elijah Camren, who tries to show Ivy that she is way too good to hold a man down that has been so disloyal to her in the past. When Ivy falls for Elijah's charm, just a teeny bit, she is stuck with having feelings for him even when Portland returns. Will she dibble and dabble like Jersey? Or will fate have to pick for her as well? Everyone seems to be in a love that's forbidden, frowned upon, or just downright wrong. Follow Jersey, Cheyla, and Ivy, as they all share forbidden love with a thug.

    Until she starts having dreams that are someone else’s memories. The world is on its second pandemic in a decade and EMT Angelica Morgan is burned out. * An old boyfriend, and surprise her new boss, puts her on administrative leave. Believing tea and cookies is a good solution, Angelica heads to her grandmothers. Can the world get weirder? Yes, yes it can. * What Angelica learns sends her careening down an entirely new path. One she isn’t even sure she wants no matter how much she desires to help humanity. Angelica realizes the advantages. But will she live to make use of them?

    The stakes are high and Sierra knows that if she wants to have that perfect family she’s always dreamed about, she would need to seek help. Ace Newman is a former Navy SEAL and a member of the elite security outfit, Silver Shields. Ace is good at two things: protecting his charges at all cost and keeping himself emotionally distant. When he meets Sierra, his walls slowly begin to crumble. Suddenly, nothing is more important to Ace than keeping Sierra safe and to do that, they hit the road. BOOK 2 Janey Moore led a simple and unpredictable life running her flower shop in a small town in Oklahoma. But when her sister mysteriously went missing she risked everything and went to Chicago in an effort to find her. When several strange things begin to happen, Janey realizes that her life might be in danger. The one person who can keep her safe is Silver Shields special operator, Drew Campbell but he is the last person she will ask for help. Drew Campbell is a man who is crushed by the weight of guilt. He can never open himself up to love again. Then he meets Janey Moore and his world tilts on its axis. When he hears that her life might be in danger, he decides that it’s up to him to save her. The only problem is that Janey does not want to be saved, not by Drew. BOOK 3 Nico Ortega is a man with a mission and that does not involve falling for the lovely and fiery woman who stole from him. Determined to get back what is his, he abducts her at gunpoint from a party and takes her to his private island. Now that he has her in his custody, he can get what she stole from him and send her on her way. However, things don’t turn out the way he plans. Tamika White lost everyone she’s ever cared about as well as her ability to laugh. A woman of few words, she retreated into a place deep down where no emotional connection can touch her. Then she meets Nico Ortega, the superhot, super rich hotelier. Sure that it's simply a case of mistaken identity, Tamika White decides to help Nico trace the woman he is after, a woman who looks remarkably like she does. BOOK 4 Hope Conran is the co-founder of one of the most popular dating sites. With an almost cult-like following among hackers, she is also one of the nicest people. But Hope hides a deep, dark secret from her childhood, one that is determined to creep out and consume her. She has had a series of life-threatening events that were too close for comfort and is afraid that someone might be after her life. Then to top it all, someone is systematically hacking into her servers and the damage is enough to wipe out years of hard work. She is at her wit’s end when a chance encounter leads her to Silver Shields operator and resident tech guru, Rusty Rosabelle. A former army engineer who served in the middle east, Rusty is very familiar with danger. As a techie and an ethical hacker, he is the perfect protector for Hope, but his arrogance rubs her the wrong way. Rusty puts his life on the line to protect Hope and in the process gets to see the beautiful, but broken soul that lives in her, making him question everything he has ever believed about love. BOOK 5 Emily Silver is the founder of Silver Shields, a security outfit that has earned a reputation as one of the best in the country. Several years ago, her life was shattered when she lost her seven-year-old daughter to kidnappers. Now there are two things that drive Emily: searching for her daughter and hating her ex-husband, tech billionaire, Wayne Carter.

     Every teenage girl has a diary in which she vents her frustrations with siblings and parents. But a zombie apocalypse? This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things During the Zombie Apocalypse is a comedic adventure about a teenage girl, her frustrating family, two high-spirited dogs, and a neighborhood of loveable rednecks coming together to survive a zombie outbreak.

    All Janelle wants is to graduate from college, get back to her pack, and find her mate, but werepanthers are hunting her. She escapes to San Antonio, where the werepanthers find her. Out of options, she jumps into vacationing SAPD Detective Nate Rollins’ car. Little does he know his old life is over.Now, he must protect them both from creatures he never knew existed.But things are not as they seem.Nate has a secret even he doesn’t know. A secret that throws them both into more danger.His old life is gone.Can he survive his new one?

    What if you had a genie who wanted your every last desire to come true? What if you had two? And what if they were competing to see who could do a better job?What would you wish for?

    She had just finished up a challenging five years at California's top legal college. Next stop, back home to Egypt to help her parents law firm. They specialized in help people of a certain kind escape repression, people of the supernatural world that is. When a vampire, whom she assumes was sent by the vicious and murderous Naqi family shows up at her school, Mariska must decide if she should feel school and return home or stay and fight. When her parents go missing, the decision is made for her about what to do. She will stop at nothing to find her parents and protect them. Even the charming prince Daemon can't stop her from finding the people she loves most in the world. His charm and the secrets he’s hiding intrigue her though. She wants to stay with him in his castle and be with him intimately, but her family will always come first. Will Mariska risk everything, including love to find her family or will she be too late to save any of them from the brutal Naqi Family Please be aware that this short romance story. Shorter fiction is a fun and quick read. T

     It’s a normal day at the Dripping Springs Superstore. Shoppers look at merchandise while keeping their kids under control. Customers wait in the check-out lines, some chatting, others silently bored. Everything is about to change. Terrorists rush in with guns blazing, killing all who try to escape, rounding up the rest to hold hostage. Carrie, pregnant mother with a four-year-old at home, escapes into a stockroom closet. She calls her husband Jason, an Austin PD officer. Jason and his partner find a raging massacre in the parking lot. They attack, badly outnumbered until Kelly and his rednecks fly onto the parking lot in their pickup trucks, shooting the terrorists where they stand. Inside the store, Carrie’s hiding place is about to be discovered. She pulls the pistol from her purse and waits, firing when her closet is opened, killing the enemy. As her husband frantically searches for her, Carrie slips into the storefront and attacks, foiling the terrorist’s plans. Reunited, Carrie and Jason think the danger is over. They are wrong. Terrorists attack them at home later that night, forcing them to flee into the darkness. Others join them as they try to find safety, the relentless enemy hounding them wherever they go. Now there is only one thing left to do. Fight back. Hunt the hunters. If you love action-packed tales of bravery, self-reliance, and the triumph of the human spirit, you’ll love Bug Out! Texas. Download your copy today!

    Gain powers. Unleash Goddesses. The locket that James got for his crush was supposed to be a present - but after opening it he accidentally unleashed a pair of ancient gods, reigniting a battle that has been centuries in the making. Now he's taken on their powers, and the only way to stop a terrible evil from laying waste to humanity is to team up with an ancient consortium of goddesses who have two things on their mind; stopping evil and satisfying James. Luckily for James, he's got time for both. Warning: This story involves violence, monsters, an enchanted axe, two goddesses that the main character gladly satisfies, cross-dimensional travel, roof-jumping, embarrassment, library shelves toppling like dominos, and security guards generally having a bad time.