Like the bungling burglar who logged on to his own Facebook page at his victim's house - and forgot to turn the computer off when he left, or the stupid bank robber who made his escape in his own car - complete with personalised number plates, or the idiotic criminal who tried to hand himself into the police... in order to collect the reward. Award-winning writer Andrew Penman has scoured the country for this hilarious collection of those who are not just bad, but also dim very dim. 'Andrew Penman enjoys a laugh at the expense of Britain's most stupid burglars' - The Mirror 'Exploits so dim-witted it's surprising they ever managed to keep themselves breathing long enough to commit any crime' - Wales Online Illustrated with cartoons drawn by Neil Kerber.

    

    Fatal Treasure is a truly compelling read.-Aphrodite Jones, New York Times bestselling author of Cruel Sacrifice and All She WantedIn 1622, hundreds of people lost their lives to the curse of the Spanish galleon Atocha-and they would not be the last. Fatal Treasure combines the rousing adventure of Ship of Gold in the Deep Blue Sea with the compelling characters and local color of Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil. It tells the powerful true story of the relentless quest to find the Atocha and reclaim her priceless treasures from the sea. You'll follow Mel Fisher, his family, and their intrepid team of treasure hunters as they dive beneath the treacherous waters of the Florida Straits and scour the ocean floor in search of gold, silver, and emeralds. And you'll discover that nearly four centuries after the shipwreck, the curse of the Atocha is still a deadly force.""On this day, the sea once again relinquished its hold on the riches and glory of seventeenth-century Spain. And by the grace of God, I would share the moment of glory . . . . I was reaching for my eighth emerald, another big one, when the invisible hands squeezed my trachea. In desperation, I clutched at my throat to pry away the enemy's fingers. But no one had hold of me.""-From the Prologue

    He spent the first year of his sobriety close to home, tending his garden, where he cast his mind back over his life, searching for the memories he'd tried to drown in vodka. Lane has gardened for as long as he can remember, and his garden's life has become inseparable from his own. A new bloom on a plant, a skirmish among the birds, the way a tree bends in the wind, and the slow, measured change of seasons invariably bring to his mind an episode from his eventful past. What the Stones Remember is the emerging chronicle of Lane's attempt to face those memories, as well as his new self--to rediscover his life. In this powerful and beautifully written book, Lane offers readers an unflinching and unsentimental account of coming to one's senses in the presence of nature.

    When they returned the next year, they were met with sticks and stones, stripped naked and sent home with red cheeks.Mark Horrell and his two friends Mark and Ian shared a dream to climb an 8,000m peak, but it seemed the gods were against them too. They had made no fewer than eight attempts without success (though they had managed to return with their clothes on).With towering ice walls, monsoon rainstorms, arm-twisting crevasses and – most dangerous of all – welcoming teahouses ready to entrap them, would it be different this time?

    My withdrawal/delirium tremens (DTs) were terrifying and excruciating.My story takes the reader through my experiences of late stage alcoholism, two arrests by my new husband of three months and my subsequent adventures through and between five inpatient treatment centers for alcohol abuse.

    There's no need to look through dozens of photos of birds that don't live in Texas. This book features 170 species of Texas birds, organized by color for ease of use. Do you see a yellow bird and don't know what it is? Go to the yellow section to find out. Fact-filled information, a compare feature, range maps and detailed photographs help to ensure that you positively identify the birds that you see.

    Pellham **Do you own a guinea pig but don’t know the first thing about how to take proper care of it? Are you considering getting one but want to make sure it’s really the best decision for you? Whatever your situation, this book will teach you everything you need to know to make sure you are making the best possible decisions.Taking care of any pet can be a huge responsibility. That’s why it is so important to do your research and really know what you are getting yourself into before you actually commit to owning any pet. Guinea pigs are no exception to this rule. While they are becoming increasingly more common as household pets, guinea pigs are still somewhat exotic and, as a result, most people don’t really know much about exactly what they need.That’s exactly where this book comes in. If you’ve been browsing the animal shelter or pet websites and can’t resist the adorable furry face of those guinea pigs you’ve seen, read this book before you make an impulse decision you might regret.Learn about:•The 10 different breeds of guinea pig you can own as a pet•The pros & cons of owning a pet guinea pig•The supplies you’ll need to provide a proper home for your new pet (and a rough estimate of how much it will cost)•The basic care you will need to provide for your guinea pig•How to train your guinea pig to do cool & useful tricks•A brief overview of how to breed your pet guinea pig and sell the offspringSo get this book and decide if this adorable little creature is the right addition to your home and then learn how you can be the best guinea pig parent there ever was!>>Purchase or Download This Book Today, Available on Kindle & in Print. <<

    You don't just get that, though. No longer do you have to spend precious minutes clicking through to apps to find out detailed information about them!You'll also get information on star ratings, number of reviews, bestseller position and pricing information. All of this is included inside this regularly updated book, giving you WAY more information than you'll find in just about any other 'top apps' book today.All of the recommendations, star ratings, pricing and other information are broken down by the following categories:Communication/Social Networking Cooking/Food Education Entertainment Finance Games Health Kids Music News/Weather Productivity Sports Travel Utilities Now you never have to guess at what apps are good and what are bad!(Notice: This book was written for the USA Kindle AppStore market and may not apply to other countries.)

    Featuring her make-at-home cleaning products, easy step-by-step guides and all her recommendations for toxic-free and eco-friendly products, this book is the ultimate guide to keeping on top of your house, and having fun while you do it.Lynsey shares her daily and seasonal routines, motivating and encouraging you along the way with so that you are left with the will, and the skill, to take on even the most seemingly insurmountable tasks and end up with a clean, calm and happy home.

    Written with a very funny and riveting honesty as only a person with the illness can do, Bipolar Happens! offers practical knowledge and deep insights into what it is like to live with bipolar disorder.Compelling, insightful and never afraid to tell the truth , many of Julie’s readers credit this book as being their personal catalyst for change. “When I read this book I actually felt that someone really understood me, and it made me feel hope for the first time since my diagnosis. I didn’t know what it meant to be psychotic or why I got overwhelmed a lot in crowds. I learned how to manage mania much better than in the past. And now I can see that I’m not the only one who wakes up with depression. Julie is funny and so willing to say what many people won’t. This book talks about the stuff we go through that never gets put into books. The book is like reading fables. It’s not overwhelming, but you really learn a lot.”

    For years I stumbled around in a daze drinking stale, bitter coffee and grumbling “beans… beans…”. Thank Goodness I finally woke up to the world of coffee. By Immersing myself in the coffee world via reading every book I could find, visiting trade fairs, every high-end cafe I could find, and barista competitions, I realized that, while there is a huge amount of information out there free on the Internet and in artisan coffee shops, there was no single resource that connects all the dots and spells it all out for confused novice coffee drinkers.Until now.Fact: Making a great cup of coffee requires focus and commitment. This means that to make a billion dollar for-profit coffee franchise, you MUST find ways to cut corners and short change your customers.Fact: There are some GREAT coffee shops out there that care about coffee and customers and are worth every penny they charge, but they can be hard to identify, making it easy to just settle for familiar chain coffee.Fact: Making very good coffee is NOT THAT HARD. With a minimal investment in time and education you can make the best cup of coffee you’ve ever had in your life in the comfort of your own home. This book shows exactly why billion dollar for-profit coffee chains are inherently unable to produce coffee of the quality you can make in the kitchen.The Coffeeist Manifesto is half self-defense manual and half how-to instructional. By the end of it, any coffee beginner will have a foundational understanding of the coffee industry and know how to identify the good coffee shops from the bad ones. But most importantly, you’ll know how to beat them at their own game by making coffee at home that blows the cafes out of the water.Complete Table of Contents:PrefaceHow to Read This BookPart I -Coffee TheoryCoffeeists of the World, Unite!HistoryBarista's DilemmaCoffee MythsFour Keys to Killer CoffeeHome RoastingPart II - Brew MethodsCold BrewCoffee PotPress PotAeropressPour OverVacuum PotPart III - EspressoMoka PotMyPressi TwistEspresso VariationsPart IV - The Truth About Coffee ShopsCoffee Shop AppreciationThe RulesDecoding the MenuPart V - Going Beyond the BasicsThe Politics of CoffeeFrom Coffeeist to AficionadoAppendix - Green Coffee Extract

    You'll also learn about asking the right question: "When do I have to shoot?" The concept of "Don't shoot - Training for the draw is just as effective." Force on force notebook: Revisiting the 21 foot rule in regards to carrying concealed. A special section on 10 seconds to fight. Download your Copy of this report. This report is published by The United States Concealed Carry Association, the biggest community of responsibly-armed Americans.

    

    One of the most delightful surprises as an essential oil user is the constant discovery of how many diversities each oil is capable of. The magnitude of this knowledge and the search for effective recipes that make every drop count can be somewhat overwhelming at times, for both beginning and seasoned oilers. The recipes contained in this REVISED EDITION utilize essential oils available from any reputable essential oil company. This creation is a culmination of "Best-of-the Best" aromatherapy recipes used successfully in various essential oil communities, and is a valuable tool for expanding your working knowledge of applications. A wide array of topics and over 300 recipes are covered in 104 pages that create creams, serums, salves, roller bottle blends, diffuser blends and more. Featuring an easy-to-use layout, there is room beside each recipe, as well as blank section in the back, to note your own modifications and experiments. This made-with-love book is a wonderful resource designed to free beginners from intimidation and feelings of being overwhelmed, as well as allow advanced essential oil users to broaden their horizons. Sections include:  Frequently asked questions  Respiratory Support  Concentration  Mood Enhancement  Stress Management  The Bedroom  Beauty & Skin Care  Health & Hygiene  Men  Children  Household  Outdoors DISCLAIMER: This document is a compilation of recipes used successfully by persons who use high-quality, authentic, plant-derived, unadulterated essential oils as determined by many factors including growth, growth location, harvesting process, distillation method used, etc. There are many grades of essential oils available. Not all essential oils are created equally, and not all essential oils are suitable for topical use or ingestion. Carefully do your research before selecting the brand(s) of essential oils that decide to use, and be selective concerning essential oil supplies as well. Always follow label directions on the essential oil bottles. The willingness of individual users to share their recipes in this book is very much appreciated. However, neither the contributors to this book nor myself are medical practitioners and cannot diagnose, treat or prescribe treatment for any health condition or disease. Before using any alternative medicines, natural supplements, or vitamins, you should always discuss the products you are using or intend to use with your medical practitioner, especially if you are pregnant, trying to get pregnant or nursing. All information contained within this book is for reference purposes only, and is not intended to substitute advice given by a pharmacist, physician or other licensed health-care professional. As such, the author nor Everyday Oil Solutions are responsible for any loss, claim or damage arising from use of the essential oil recipes contained herein.