Laugh out loud as they encounter ‘crocodiles’ on the wall, strange African customs and unintelligible Afrikaans accents. Cringe with them as their visiting in-laws embarrass them in front of their new SA friends.If you enjoyed Educating Rita and Shirley Valentine you will recognise Mavis Turner.Set in the 1970s, But Can You Drink The Water? uses subtle observational humour with an underlying pathos to portray the upsets, hurt and changing family dynamics that emigration brings. (The story is based on a 13-part sitcom) ReviewWith a droll, witty, utterly British voice, this manuscript tackles playfully and sincerely the age-old fish out of water tale. What sustains this book, however, is the narrative voice, the dry and self-deprecating humor, and the ability of this author to tell a story simply and well. Publisher’s Weekly reviewer for the ABNA semi-finals.

    They have supported each other through difficult and happy times over the years, and now hope for the best holiday season ever. With a Christmas baby on the way, and now confined to her bed, Kyla is hoping that her pregnancy goes without a hitch. Meanwhile, Jude is juggling raising her rambunctious toddler all while managing Island Thyme Café; and at the height of her B&B’s seasonal rush, Lily is faced with a last minute change that could threaten to derail all of their holiday plans. This holiday season, enjoy the most wonderful time of year with the residents of Madrona Island in this heartwarming novella from the Amazon Bestselling author of The Guestbook. This Christmas story takes place a few years after the end of the third book, Island Thyme Cafe, in the Madrona Island series. However, this book can be read as a standalone.

    

    The economy is collapsing, his health is failing, and around his hometown of Broughty Ferry, Bob is struggling to get the respect he deserves. Fortunately his email junk folder is bursting with offers of assistance from around the world. In these genuine emails, Bob Servant looks to the Internet's worst con merchants and charlatans for answers to his many woes. The author of the bestselling Delete This At Your Peril and the critically acclaimed Radio 4 series The Bob Servant Emails is back with an all-new compilation of emails targeting a fresh batch of email spammers—the false lenders who have bravely stepped into the credit crunch, supposed doctors offering expensive treatments for Bob's ailments, and fake foreign soldiers offering him military advice in his campaign against a local bowling club. They all find a man from Broughty Ferry who is ready and willing to give them his valuable time.

    His search for the truth soon becomes a fight for survival and a race against evil, with any chance of correcting the timeline slowly slipping away.*** Time Split is also available in paperback. Also by Patricia Smith: Distant Suns, Distant Suns - The Journey Home, Islands - The Epidemic and Nebathan.

    But when Richard Colman adopts his dead sister's daughter, he has no idea how tough life can be.Richard's girlfriend walks out. His business starts losing clients. And there's something terribly wrong with the little girl.Her name is Bernadette, but Richard calls her "Barney". It's a word his own father used to use... a barney, a row, a terrible racket. And Barney is well-named – she never stops screaming. She hammers her head on the floor and the walls. She's adorable, but she doesn't sleep. She cannot talk. She won't even respond to her name.Richard slowly faces the unbearable truth that his little girl is profoundly autistic. And as he prepares for a battle simply to be allowed to keep his child, he's only beginning to find out how tough life can be. Christopher Stevens, the bestselling author of A REAL BOY, draws on painful and intensely personal experiences of raising his own autistic child, to create this compelling story of a single parent who must come to terms with his beloved little girl's autism.AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is a novel. The characters are fictional, though they are very real to me. Many of the events in the story did really happen to my family, following the diagnosis of my younger son with autism. I later wrote a memoir about this intensely emotional and exhausting experience: it was published as A REAL BOY. If you have read this memoir, you might recognise some of the scenes and situations in A GIRL CALLED BARNEY – and if you want to read a strictly factual account, the memoir will better suit your needs. A GIRL CALLED BARNEY is more dramatic, more tragic and less humorous than the later, non-fiction book. I used the novel to express the darker, more frightening emotions that, in real life, we hardly dare admit that we feel.Praise for A REAL BOY, Christopher Stevens's factual account of raising his autistic son:Jane Asher, President of the National Autistic Society"This wonderfully honest book tells us a great deal, not only about autism, but also about the extraordinary tolerance and unselfishness that is borne out of unequivocal love. At the same time, it reveals some uncomfortable truths about the struggle it takes to access the rights of those with disabilities in our so-called civilized society."The Sun, 15 Feb 08"incredibly moving"Daily Mail, February 26, 2008Christopher Stevens writes poignantly about life with his autistic son. It's a moving account of the boy's struggle to cope with a world that confuses him - and the extraordinary leap forward that gave them all hope.Bournemouth Daily Echo, 27th June 08By turns harrowing, humorous and inspirational.About the AuthorChristopher Stevens has been a senior sub-editor at the Observer for fourteen years and is also the author of Born Brilliant, the acclaimed biography of Kenneth Williams; Masters of Sitcom, a celebration of Galton and Simpson; and Thirty Days Has September, the bestselling reference book on Kindle.Born Brilliant was shortlisted for a "Sherry", the Sheridan Morley Theatre Biography Prize. It was adapted and broadcast as a Radio Four Book of the Week.

    It's a Tuesday.Bradley Michaels is just another man ending just another workday at just another job. He can list the usual complaints, can point his finger at the usual causes, and he can go about his routine as if one day is absolutely no different from the next. Until God himself just shows up uninvited and shakes up Bradley's entire existence by flaunting his own. It's not fair, but Bradley never claimed life is. And he tries to handle the new, omniscient presence in his head with calm attention and cool collectedness. But God happens to be a bit of a kid. He likes to joke, to prod, to stir things up. And what God sets his mind to, God succeeds at. Just as Bradley believes he's got life all figured out, God has to throw a wrench into it. But not at all in the way that Bradley—or you—can expect. Just when you think life is going according to plan, you find out your plan sucks. And it's time for a new one.

    She quits her advertising job, and moves into a small coastal town, in a tiny house on wheels. Surely, the laid back country life with organic veggies will turn back the clock for her. Now, she only has to find the right guy–and it can’t be her odd, new neighbour who doesn’t want kids. No matter how hot he is. This time, Nina is determined to follow the plan, not her heart.Jay is used to solitary life. After his father’s death, he tries to keep the farm running, even if he’s more comfortable with the veggies than people. But who needs social skills? In the backside of Raglan, nothing ever happens. Until a cute, Finnish blonde moves into the neighbouring lot, in a ridiculous tiny house. Can Jay work out his issues and take a chance on the most exotic thing that’s ever walked into his life?Work, life, love and all those other big questions that vex us are are tackled in this humorous and thought-provoking book, which will stay with you long after you reach the end.

     Enjoys walking barefoot across shards of broken home. Likes loaded silences, resentment and insomnia. Dislikes romantic weekends, lie-ins and any chance of future happiness. Former GSOH. Developing PTSD. Ella Shawe was undomesticated, unattached and uninhibited. Until she met Dan. Sexy, charming and funny, Dan ticked all the right boxes and Ella threw herself head-first into the whirlwind romance. But now she’s moved into his family home, complete with two demanding children and a hyperactive dog. Throw in Dan’s impossibly perfect ex-wife, Ella’s interfering sex therapist mother and the snooty and dismissive mother-in-law from Hell, and Ella is almost ready to throw in the towel. But, ready or not, Ella is part of the family now, and getting it right for Dan’s kids means getting it right for everyone. She just needs to figure out how to include herself in the mix… Girlfriend, Interrupted will have you laughing-out-loud, gasping in embarrassment and rooting for Ella all the way. This British romantic comedy is packed full of humour and has a delightful contemporary heroine at its heart.

    In the end they burned the people. Karen was only nine when it started. Five years later she is watching the smoke rise from her parent's cremation with her younger brother and sister. She needs to find them somewhere safe. It won't be easy. Food is scarce. Militias round up the survivors to take them to death camps. Helicopters and drones patrol the sky on search and destroy missions. Rebels roam the countryside pillaging from the innocent for the supposed greater good, and vile opportunists prey on the weakest of the survivors. She has to get them off the mainland to a place the Loop hasn't touched. She knows where to go. It's a five hundred mile journey. It seems impossible. She doesn't know if they can make it. She calls it Shetland.

    The first is to move off the Tradmore Estate, and the second is to see Paris. Archie wants for nothing. He has his five-bedroom house but no one to share it with now that his beloved wife, Cath, has died.  And then … Holly has a disastrous night out and, against all the odds, Archie meets Rosie. A funny, sad and poignant tale of how love can be found in the strangest of places.

    Go to this entry on GoodReads if you wish to add the book by Graeme Simsion.

    Along the way he falls in love, drinks a lot of beer, eats too many sweets, ponders the meaning of life on the dole, and gets admitted to hospital for a painful condition.

    He talks to the models, he reads hundreds of filthy readers' letters, he organises the photoshoots and even gets to direct the action. He has, according to his non-porn friends, "the best job in the world". But Godfrey Bishop has a problem. Godfrey Bishop is going through the sex drought to end all sex droughts. He hasn't been with a woman in over a year and this knee-twisting frustration is magnified a hundred times by his daily grind. He feels like Billy Bunter put in charge of the cake shop, only to have the Atkins diet forced upon him at gun point. Chuck into the mix a twelve girl orgy, a stable of alcoholic co-workers, an angry argumentative feminist, a naked run from justice and an obsessive nutty reader who thinks Godfrey is trying to scupper his chances of marrying the magazine's centre-spread girl and you have Danny King's filthiest and funniest novel yet – according to the back of the book. Godfrey Bishop has "the best job in the world" – and it's doing his f*cking head in.

    A missing husband. A plot to blow up a national treasure. Fortune telling aunts. Mary Catherine, MC for short, didn’t move as the Queen of Boca Vista, Babbs La-Fleur, placed a pile of cash, which appeared out of a purse she knew cost more than her car, smack dab in the middle of her desk.Word at all the cocktail parties was that MC had a skill that came in handy for an aging socialite going through a divorce. She was good at finding cash in hidden bank accounts. Cash to pay for a nip and tuck and a new identity: Cougar. Hired that day by Queen Babbs to find her bad boy husband, Charlie, MC was back on familiar ground, tracking down bad guys through clues left in the DNA of their paper life. Asking her Aunt Sophia to read the family fortune telling cards might have helped. Instead, the paper trail Charlie left takes MC from a murder in the world of rich socialites to working with covert government agents deep in the world of counter terrorism.Praise for Bribing Saint Anthony Review from Sheldon Siegel "I had a chance to read Bribing Saint Anthony on a recent flight. It was a great read! I don't have a lot of time to read for fun these days, and your story was a treat. You have a nice touch, and MC is an engaging lead. Reminded me a bit of Carl Hiaasen--What is it about Florida, anyway?!? Keep up the good work!" Cheers from San Francisco, SheldonSheldon Siegel is a New York Times best-selling author of the critically acclaimed legal thriller series featuring Mike Daley and Rosie Fernandez, two of the most beloved characters in contemporary crime fiction.