And this time he's got a baby. William Walker loves his gorgeous wife and new son – even if he did faint at the birth. What man wouldn't, after two whole days of labour and only one small sip of (medicinal) whiskey to sustain him? But now he's a father, and a proud one at that. It's just a shame that parenthood doesn't stop him doing the wrong thing at precisely the wrong time, with comically catastrophic results for his small – and increasingly exasperated – family.This hilarious romantic comedy will have you laughing out loud as William battles everything from floods to the Machiavellian denizens of a sinister Kentish village with more than a few hints of Royston Vasey…

    Not human. Not A.I.He’s both, or perhaps in the end, neither.He’s got himself a new ship to explore the stars that rivaled anything in the A.I. or Xaran fleets, a new position he never expected, and problems dropped into his lap that he didn’t see coming.He wasn’t ready for any of it, he wanted to explore who he was, and the galaxy around him, with his ship and companion Chrystal.Then the biggest surprise of all, invasion. Worse, the Xaran empire’s technology isn’t up to the task, he needs to not just step up, he needs to step up in a big way.WARNING: This book is an erotic science fiction novel. If you are offended by explicit sex, do not buy this book. There are MF, and MFF scenes of a sexually explicit nature.NOTE: This novel is told in the third person limited from Mike’s point of view. NOTE: This novel is not a LitRPG, it is erotic science fiction and space opera. This novel occurs in the same universe as Ted Stedman’s trilogy, twenty years later, but it is not necessary to read that one first for understanding.

    With full-color photo essays, the author guides readers past good taste, sense and even logic into the magical, mayhem-ridden world known as his life.

    meets Star Wars!Blamed for a theft he didn't commit ...Pursued by some of the most dangerous creatures in the galaxy ... Adam Cain is BACK ... and ready for some royal alien ass-kicking!International bestselling science fiction author T.R. Harris introduces the first book in his new space opera series set in the universe of The Human Chronicles Saga , a thrilling tale of Human Superiority in the galaxy. The Adam Cain Chronicles  Book #1: The Dead WorldsYou've heard of him. He's Adam Cain,  The Alien with an Attitude.  Now he's back... in a series of new adventures as a badass Human showing the galaxy who's the boss. Accompanied by his buddies Riyad Tarazi and Sherri Valentine, Adam is struggling to make ends meet on a distant tropical world running Capt. Cain's Bar & Grill . The problem:They picked the worst place in the galaxy to run a legitimate business ... smack dab in the middle of lawless Dead Zone . Comprised of a hundred dead worlds left in the wake of one of Adam's old enemies--Kracion-- The Zone is a gold-rush-like region of salvagers, pirates and scoundrels,all looking for their piece of the action. And in the center of all this activity is the oasis planet of Liave-3, the home of Capt. Cain's .  In The Dead Worlds: After a supply of prototype superweapons goes missing from one of the dead worlds, suspicion falls on Adam and his friends as the thieves.Our heroes find themselves being hunted, kidnapped and otherwise abused...until they say enough is enough. That's when the aliens learn the galaxy's most important lesson: You don't mess with the Humans !  The Adam Cain Chronicles takes Adam and his friends back their basic raw talents, as supermen among the aliens of the galaxy. Set in the familiar universe of The Human Chronicles Saga , this new series rediscovers the wonder and excitement of the earlier books, when it was just Human vs. Alien. It also retains all the humor, witty banter and gritty realism of the first series. Each novel in The Adam Cain Chronicles is written to be a stand-alone work, able to be read by old and new fans alike. So if you've never experienced an Adam Cain adventures before, this is a great place to start. And for existing fans, you'll find all of the elements you loved in The Human Chronicles Saga ...and more! The ride is about to start! Order your copy of The Dead Worlds today.  Don't miss a minute of The Adam Cain Chronicles . And be sure to check out all the novels by T.R. Harris....The Adam Cain ChroniclesThe Dead Worlds The Human Chronicles SagaThe Fringe Worlds Alien Assassin The War of Pawns

    Apparently it’s fine for Scrimshaw Travel to make last minute amendments to the holiday without incurring any penalties or reducing the price in any way. That’s what the indifferent courier tells him on day one of the tour as she arrives in a clapped-out, old coach being driven by a partially-sighted driver. With the spa hotel replaced by a rundown guest house staffed by a neurotic manager, decrepit waitress and under-sexed, Italian waiter there doesn’t appear to be much of the brochure-described holiday left. Thank goodness for Angela, the rather lovely woman Derek pals up with on the journey down. She might just make the trip bearable. If only the other members of the group would leave them alone long enough to get to know each other, but Derek has always had the ability to attract the eccentric characters to him and he can’t escape them. Still, perhaps they’ll surprise him as he learns about their lives and secrets as they move from one hilarious excursion to another. And maybe Angela will provide one or two surprises herself. Driven to Distraction is a fun romp through the English countryside with characters finding love and friendship while travelling at twenty miles an hour. (Well, it is a clapped-out, old coach).

     Includes Overdue Account, Walter's Cargo Shorts, Simon's Piecharts, Missing Missy, Obviously a Foggot, Formal Complaints, Justin’s Floodlight, Matthew’s Party, Permission Slip and many more.

    Their objective is classified, marked only by coordinates leading them into a deserted city at the heart of the fighting. From the beginning, everything possible goes wrong. A missile strike rocks the carrier mid-launch, and only a fraction of the unit reaches the surface alive.Outmanned, outgunned, and scattered, with a hard deadline to orbital bombardment looming, it is up to Drop Commander Tyco Hale to rally his troops and reach their objective. But what they find, hidden deep in the tunneled passages under the city, will change everything about what he fights for and what he believes in. With the unit in tatters and loyalties divided, the choice he makes in the dark will seal all of their fates - and much more besides.

    

    

     By Your Side- Jake Miller likes his life. It’s simple and quiet. Solitary. He’s taking the last thing his mother truly cared about before she died, the properties she owned, and making them his purpose. His time in the Army hadn’t allowed him to be there for her before, but this is something he can do now. Just him and his dog. Exactly how he wants it. Until her, his first tenant. With her innate openness and blinding smiles, the opposite of everything he thought he could possibly want. Casey Steadman has less to show for her twenty-nine years than she’d hoped. No white picket fence. No 2.5 kids. And definitely no loving husband. Just a few lukewarm relationships, an exceedingly crappy apartment, and a fabulous shoe collection (and the credit card debt to prove it). Moving into her new place is one big, high heeled step towards a new life. The stable, make-boring-mature-decisions kind of life that she needs to be able to prove to her family that she can live. What she wasn’t planning on was her hotter-than-Hades new landlord. Sparks are a-flying, and they’re the kind that can only come from a stiletto-loving, dog-hating, budget-repelling, relentlessly optimistic, youngest of five becoming the tenant and next door neighbor to a stoically silent, slightly pessimistic, ‘my only friend is my dog’, only child and former Army Ranger. Casey and Jake are total opposites. But when they come together, it just might be true love. Light Me Up- For Rachel Hennessy, it’s been an interesting six months. Boyfriend? Cheated on her. Job? She totally just got fired. Starting her own wedding planning business sounds exciting … in theory. In reality, it’s completely terrifying. And on top of all that, the freaking cherry right on top? She just had an ill-timed, alcohol-instigated one-night stand with her bff Casey’s brother, Tate. Yeah, that Tate. The one that she’s had a teensy, inconvenient crush on for years. But nothing about it is ill-timed or inconvenient for Tate Steadman. Because he finally feels free. Free of the oppressive relationship he’d been in for the past six years. Free to pursue Rachel, because one alcohol-fueled night was not even close to enough for him. He just wished she saw it that way. Because she makes him want more than he ever knew he was capable of. When their one night has unexpected consequences, Rachel has no clue how to trust that he’s not just trying to be ‘the good guy’ who wants to do ‘the right thing’. And even though the chemistry between them practically burns down an entire city block when they’re together, she doesn’t know how to let down the concrete wall she’s built up around herself. The ‘mistake’ of one evening can change the trajectory of two lives, but maybe a mistake is all they really need to push them right into true love. Tell Them Lies- Liz Peters hasn’t exactly gotten the happily-ever-after she’s read about in her Jane Austen books. ‘Always a bridesmaid’ is more fitting to the way life has been passing this good girl by. About to go postal from loneliness, she meets a man who doesn’t seem to fit any of her requirements for a book-worthy hero. Kieran Carter would do just about anything to put a smile on his terminally ill mother’s face. When he meets a woman in the ice cream aisle at the grocery store, Kieran finally has opportunity to do just that. If he needs to lie in order to give his mom a little hope? Not a freakin problem.

    Of endless weekdays, working weekends, making presentations, working with complicated Excel sheets, handling a boss with time-management issues and the general politics of the workplace. Sigh! After eight years of this life, her only personal insight is that she's terribly unambitious and constantly struggling to be an average performer in the competitive corporate world. When a colleague flashes the glint of a golden sabbatical she catapults into it headfirst. After all, one has to find one's calling at some point in one's life. So will the sabbatical miraculously change her life forever? Or will she go rushing back to her pocket money-generating job?

    Now it's about to become ground zero in a gold rush by every crooked company and asteroid thief in the galaxy. Andrew Cochrane, with his crew of the finest veterans and cunning rogues, have an even better scheme. They've conned the owner into hiring them as a mercenary security company to defend the system. With no oversight but their own, Cochrane's Company plans to seize the richest pickings for themselves. But nothing ever comes easy. If they want to keep their loot, they're going to have to outwit and outfight every smuggler, bandit and renegade after the same prize - and their boss, too!

    Humanity has been enslaved or scattered to the galaxy, hiding out in lonely systems far from home. A cry for help from an enemy ship prompts action from an unlikely group of refugees and a lone fighter pilot. This begins an epic adventure that will unite the remains of the human race and take them into the depths of the darkest soul.The battle for survival is underway and the War for Terra has finally begun.

    It's OK." Over one hundred contributors share their failures, setbacks and most embarrassing moments for this compilation of hilarity with the hopes that their stories would give the embarrassed and struggling souls some comic and inspirational relief. Life is riddled with pain, disappointments, and failures, but given enough time, they're folly. "We're All A Mess. It's OK" captures life's most absurd moments honestly and without a filter. It's filled with funny essays and one-liners that highlight the grainier sides of being human and imperfect. The book covers everything from horrible internet dating experiences, the strangest of co-workers, vacations that went array, to the worst holiday gifts of all time. It's an anthology of real-life disasters. You'll enjoy comedian/actor Kim Banta's tale, "My First Date and a Sluggish Toilet," detailing a first date in the nicest home in town, ending with an overflowing toilet and panicked placement of poo into her purse. And... "You Must Have Me Confused With Someone Else" depicts Dane Levent's severe behavior problems with her golden retriever, Buddy, after picking him up from boarding, only to find out a week later that she had the wrong dog. And... "He's Worth the Wait" by Bes. D describes her mother-in-law's long-term relationship with a convicted felon she had met on Meet-An-Inmate.com. And... "Saying ‘I'm Sorry' Will Not Fix This Situation" by Ashley P. is a hilarious tale of turning her best date into her worst date by leaping onto her partner's lap, causing what is called in medical terminology, a penile fracture. And... Follow along with Traci Jo's daily embarrassment by her mother, picking her up from school wearing different wigs, such as Dorothy Hamill and Marilyn Monroe. And... Read an entire chapter dedicated to strange conditions, such as Shelley Miner Gardler's need to gather her pets before she goes to work to tell them goodbye and to assign one to be in charge while she's away. And... Discover why Christine T sorts M&Ms in ROYGBIV order and eats them first by frequency until they're even, and then one of each color in order, until they're gone. These humorous essays and quips are about the blunders and snafus, and of everyday life that most of us can relate to. It's like "Chicken Soup for the Soul" if you threw in snark and expletives. If you like Jenn Mann, Samantha Irby and Jenny Lawson, you will love "We're All A Mess. It's OK." Get a copy for your funniest friends, or for grouchy people, maybe it will cheer them up. The book is an easy read and offers a real message that we all can survive, even the worst of failures and ultimately, even though we're all a mess, it's OK. Snarky women, quip, short stories, essays, funny, humorous essays, humor essays, gifts for women, funny stories, dating, relationships, failures, work, family, cats, dogs, alpacas.

    Unfortunately they have no real resources, no good plans, and no idea what the hell they're doing. What they do have is an army of foul-mouthed monkeys who want them dead, a beautiful woman who wants some answers, a sex-crazed tribal chief, a caffeine-addicted demigod who wants to be worshipped, and a telepathic skull who just wants a little excitement. Through nonstop comedy and good old-fashioned adventure these guys are facing some long odds but do Ron and Willy give up? No they don't. They get down to business. Monkey Business.