Throw in a gig as a phone sex operator, an unexpected hunk of a boyfriend, and a client's murder, and you have all the ingredients for the perfect chick lit romp. Even bloggers at Trashionista just had to read it: "A fabulous book.” Shy, funny, loveable Emily’s a pretty unlikely candidate for a phone sex operator. She’d die if she had to talk dirty face-to-face—especially to her hot cop boyfriend. She sure didn’t set out to do phone sex—she wanted to be a writer. But when her BFF framed her for plagiarism, she got in a tiny financial hole and saw this ad for “phone actresses”… Hey, it’s not nearly as bad as it sounds. No pantyhose or pantsuits, no regular hours, you’re your own boss, and lots of people to talk to. Guys, that is. But here’s the odd thing—lots of them want to talk about more than Emily’s imagined attributes; they start to think of her as the best friend they’ll never have to meet. Next thing you know, one of her customers gets killed. What’s a phone kitten to do? Solve the murder herself, of course! “Phone Kitten was a fun debut read with an interesting premise and some great characters – excellent chick lit.” -The Brazen Bookworm “Marika Christian's debut novel was one of the most fun reads I have had this year. Sweet Emily taking a job as a 'phone actress' has to be one of the funniest things ever.” -Just Jump A fun, refreshing treat for fans of Jennifer Crusie, Janet Evanovich, and Stephanie Bond, Phone Kitten is your ticket to hours of giggles—so long as you’re not looking for raunch. Because this is so not it! “When I first heard of this book I was intrigued; a phone-sex worker turned sleuth? Sounds like the perfect mix...a fabulous book. --Trashionista Excerpt: The girl who answered the phone sounded a lot like me. She was perky, upbeat, and wanted me to come in that night for an interview. The thought terrified me, but my only other option was Walmart. I heard Walmart locks employees in the store. I've often wondered what would happen if one of the employees were pregnant and went into labor while locked up. Would they let her out? Would her supervisor deliver the baby in housewares and slap a little smiley face sticker on the baby's bottom? Phone sex had to be better than twenty-four hour retail. The company name was Dimensions. Located in the back of an industrial park, it was a little scary. There was a gravel parking lot with a dozen cars and only one door with a camera to capture anyone who pressed the call button. I was buzzed in immediately. I wondered, Why does a phone sex place need this much security? I was met by Taylor, the bubbly girl I talked to on the phone. “Come on, I'll take you in the back and we can talk.” She wasn't what I pictured. Taylor was a tattooed Goth chick, with every piercing imaginable. Taylor isn't what most people envisioned when it came to “bubbly.” Once we were in her office, she quickly closed the door. “Look, we talk dirty here. The language is sexually explicit. You have to say it all. Tits, cock, and fuck. Can you do that?” “Yes.” There, I said it. I said I could do it. I hoped I really could. She whipped out a headset, plugged it in, and said, “I want you to listen to a call.

    Getting away with it is highly preferable, of course, but perhaps when I’m long gone, someone will open an old safe and find this confession. The public would reel. After all, almost nobody else in the world can possibly understand how someone, by the tender age of 28, can have calmly killed six members of her family. And then happily got on with the rest of her life, never to regret a thing.When Grace Bernard discovers her absentee millionaire father has rejected her dying mother’s pleas for help, she vows revenge, and sets about to kill every member of his family. Readers have a front row seat as Grace picks off the family one by one – and the result is as and gruesome as it is entertaining in this wickedly dark romp about class, family, love… and murder.But then Grace is imprisoned for a murder she didn’t commit.Outrageously funny, compulsive and subversive, perfect for fans of Killing Eve and My Sister, the Serial Killer.

    When Lassie and Murdock's game of "What Won't Murdock eat?" goes wrong, a trip to the emergency vet is in order. And when a crazed snake owner takes the vet hostage, it is up to Henry, Lassie, and Murdock to save the day. But they only have one hour. And the clock is ticking... *Disclaimer: THIS IS ONLY 40 PAGES LONG *Disclaimer about the disclaimer: 40 HILARIOUS PAGES :)

    Like an alcoholic taking a sip of whiskey. But no. Nothing. I had a blissful night’s sleep. Didn’t wake up at all. And for once, no bad dream either. This morning I feel balanced. Almost sane, for once.Rhiannon is your average girl next door, settled with her boyfriend and little dog…but she’s got a killer secret.Although her childhood was haunted by a famous crime, Rhiannon’s life is normal now that her celebrity has dwindled. By day, her job as an editorial assistant is demeaning and unsatisfying. By evening, she dutifully listens to her friends’ plans for marriage and babies while secretly making a list.A kill list.From the man at the grocery checkout who always mishandles her apples, to the driver who cuts her off on her way to work, to the people who have it coming, Rhiannon is ready to get her revenge.Because the girl everyone overlooks might be able to get away with murder…

    At the perpetual age of 650, this is really no longer an option. The Full Moon Event Paulie Vergen is a Vampire living the daily grind of life until a fateful day when a newly infected Werewolf landed on his doorstep. All Paulie wanted was peace and quiet, but life didn't often seem to care about his plans. He's now faced with helping the poor Werewolf navigate through the Underworld in order to find the help that he needs. Bob the Zombie Bob is a Zombie who was just going about his business when a band of thieves stole his hand so that they could make a batch of Elfagra in the Upperworld. While it's bad enough that they've stolen Bob's hand for such a purpose, it comes to the Zombie's attention that if the bad guys use the wrong technique it could cause a cosmic rift that will spell the real death of Bob...not just the long, drawn out one that's part of being a Zombie. Gappy's Gadgets Gappy Whirligig is an industrious Gnome who has yet to reach the Age of Tinkering. In a flash, Gappy's life flips upside down, leaving him to make the decision to either strike out on his own or become a 42-year-old foster child. Gappy demonstrates his industrious spirit as he leaves Hubintegler's rules and regulations behind and instead seeks to make his mark in the seedy town of Planoontik.These stories get their influence from Terry Pratchett's Discworld, Robert Asprin's Myth Adventures, Monty Python, and countless other comedic mediums. This omnibus edition includes the first four books in the Tales from the Land of Ononokin series. You'll get wizards, vampires, werewolves, dwarves, elves, gnomes, orcs, ogres, giants, gorgans, humans, trolls, zombies, and more ... and it's all set in a fantastical world that will keep you giggling for weeks.

    It had always been her dream to open a cafe on the beach and it was finally becoming a reality - until her husband disappeared into thin air. No calls, notes or clues as to where he went. Now days before the cafe’s opening, a private investigator notifies Jaymee that her husband's disappearance isn’t by mistake and the cafe, along with her life, is part of something much bigger. As more dark secrets start coming to light, Jaymee must act fast to uncover truths and figure out how to save her dream, family and the cafe.With the help of her loving daughter and a handsome investigator, ideas start coming together and the journey to save the cafe begins.Unexpected secrets, new romances and faith create an adventure Jaymee never could have dreamed of. Before the time Spring ends, relationships are strengthened, truths are discovered, and love is renewed in more ways than one.

    The United States is braced for a potential government shutdown and a US default on its debt. Washington is at the height of political dysfunction. Renowned Harvard professor, Winston Bernard Huntster II, has just aired a controversial documentary on the History Channel. To the mass of American viewers, it is an eerily striking comparison to the egocentric arrogance of the political landscape of present day. It is, to the millions of Americans tuned in, the fuel that would fire a movement to stop the reckless abuses in Washington D.C. Now, the man behind the firestorm is found dead in Boston Common from a gunshot wound to the head. His death has outraged an angry nation and incited its citizens to take to the streets. They will soon learn there is but one weapon that can crack the stronghold on Capitol Hill—the power of Article V. Show more Show less

    

    They are on their way to visit his parents for Christmas, but they never arrive.Tim has an unshakable feeling that something will go horribly wrong even before they set off. What happens is far worse than he could have imagined.The tragedy that occurs sees grief-stricken Tim back in his investigator role, seeking justice.

    And when a filmmaker friend is brutally murdered in the manner of a death scene from one of his movies, she's convinced that a copycat killer is on the loose�and that she's the next target. The man who swoops in to save her is the mysterious new love interest Anatoly Darinsky. Of course, if this were fiction, Anatoly would be her prime suspect.… Passion, Betrayal and Killer Highlights When her brother-in-law turns up dead and her sister is accused of the crime, Sophie's priority is finding the real killer. With or without Anatoly's help. Her brother-in-law's secret life yields plenty of suspects, but the San Francisco police aren't taking any of them seriously. So Sophie does what comes naturally to her: she stirs up trouble (to lure the killer out, of course). Obsession, Deceit and Really Dark Chocolate Sophie's relationship with the irresistible and occasionally insufferable Anatoly is on the rocks when a friend recruits Sophie to decode her allegedly two-timing husband's strange behavior. Suddenly plunged into a crazy world of campaign mudslinging, dirt-digging and cover-ups, Sophie begins to uncover some pretty dirty secrets indeed. Way in over her head as usual, Sophie reluctantly�or not-so-reluctantly�enlists the help of her two-time sidekick and ex, Anatoly. Lust, Loathing and a Little Lip Gloss Sophie is head over heels in love�with a three-bedroom San Francisco Victorian. She's just got to have it, despite a few drawbacks. Her slimy ex is the realtor, and her first tour of the house reveals, well, a lifeless body clutching a cameo with a disturbing history of its own. There's no way Sophie is going to give up the ghost on her dreams of stained glass and original woodwork, though�especially since Sophie is 99 percent sure her problems are caused by someone six feet tall instead of six feet under….

    The Other evokes just that sort of rapid pace and dramatic imagery. Consider FBI Agent Zack Tolliver, the sun-washed ochre cliffs of Arizona, the body of a little blonde girl found on a remote mesa top apparently killed by a bear, the Navajo guide side-kick, the tracks that change mid-stride from animal to human, the evidence that appears to lead to a local recluse crazed by the tragic death of his wife and child. Then the wild ride from case closed to case wide open again, racing off to the deserts of California, another little blonde girl preyed upon and abandoned, and who’s doing all this, anyway? What sinister force is toying with our FBI agent?

     Only a poisonous rumor stood between them. Could Lydia McDowell ignore an entire village and trust the shamed Doctor Jarvis? Or would doing so come at the cost of her brother’s life...and her own frozen heart?

    What she got was a skeleton, suspicious cops ... and Charlie. Ex-truckstop waitress/new heiress Lizbet Lange inherited a mansion from her ex-husband, who neglected to put in an outdoor, Olympic-size pool in the back "grounds" before he died. So, thinking it would be just the thing to cheer her up, seeing as how she's young and alone, she sets up a "dig" with the local pool company, who promptly unearth a human skeleton. And if that isn't bad enough, what with the cops and FBI and all, tromping around in her back yard, thirty minutes later the skeleton's owner, also shows up, albeit in ghost form, and asks Lizbet to help him find out who murdered him back in 1969!

    Mired in accusations of fraud, incompetence and malpractice, Barlow is cast out of the scientific establishment and ejected from the family home.Then, after three wine-sodden years, Barlow is approached by his equally skeptical mentor, Dr Alex Sixsmith, with an extraordinary proposition. It may be an offer that Newton cannot refuse, but there’s one tiny problem:Sixsmith is dead.

    Presented in a numbered series of e-books, each containing one year's worth of strips, this is a goldmine for all Big Nate fans to see many cartoons that have never been published in books. Aspiring cartoonist Nate Wright is the star of Big Nate. As a popular middle-grade book character, Nate is 11 years old, four-and-a-half feet tall, and the all-time record holder for detentions in school history. He's a self-described genius and sixth grade Renaissance Man. Nate, who lives with his dad and older sister, has a habit of annoying his family, friends, and teachers with his sarcasm.