YOU THINK YOU KNOW THE STORYFive friends go to a remotecabin in the woods.Bad things happen.If you think you know the story, think again.Official Movie Novelization.

    Read with caution!Life has settled down for Nicole Peyton and Derek Gabriel. They've fought battles and won, but friends and family still struggle with the scars. During their first Christmas together, surrounded by the people they love most, Derek and Nick give each other the less tangible gifts that matter most--and the too tangible gifts that mean forever.

    As the 16-year-old kingpin of the Spider, his smut-peddling schoolyard syndicate, he's making a name for himself as an up-and-coming entrepreneur. Profits are on the rise, the other gangs are staying out of his business, and he's going out with Esme, the girl of his dreams.But when Esme gets kidnapped, and all the clues point towards strange forces at work, things start to get seriously weird. The only man drunk enough to help is a bearded, booze-soaked, supernatural bounty hunter that goes by the name of Jackson 'Jackie' Ronin.Plunged into the increasingly bizarre landscape of Cape Town's supernatural underworld, Baxter and Ronin team up to save Esme. On a journey that takes them through the realms of impossibility, they must face every conceivable nightmare to get her back, including the odd brush with the Apocalypse.

     Joe was just an average guy with an office job, a synthesizer band, and crush on a girl in the marketing department, until a horrible misunderstanding on a date with friends turned him into a real-life vampire. It didn’t take long for him to find out the afterlife isn’t nearly as glamorous as he’s been led to believe; it ruined his already-struggling love life, damaged things with his best friend, and pushed him away from his crazy family. So he’s letting the whole world know what it’s really like to be a card-carrying member of the undead, fighting his ridiculous situation every step of the way. But not everyone is happy to find out the truth, and for every ally he finds in the vampire world, there’s an enemy lurking in the real one, just waiting for a chance to show Joe a little vampire truth of their own... What readers are saying: "The vampire's humanity that Anne Rice strives for in The Vampire Chronicles? [Luna] captures it perfectly and smartly in his modern tale of the supernatural everyman." "I absolutely loved this book. It was full of witty sarcasm, humor, heartbreak and suspense." "Joe Vampire is a laugh out loud hysterical, sometimes poignant, read. I recommend this book to anyone looking for a funny, sarcastic look at the undead life." "I laughed out loud several times reading this book and giggled so many times my husband made me leave the room to go read elsewhere!"

    Be careful what you wish for...When a lowly antiques dealer who's in love with the governor's girlfriend releases a genie from a magic lamp, he unwittingly wishes himself into a hole the size of the Grand Canyon!

    What happened to Benny Imura and his friends after they reached Sanctuary—and discovered that it was far from the miracle they had thought it would be? Jonathan Maberry shares a glimpse into a formative moment in an exclusive e-short story that also features Joe Ledger (Patient Zero, Extinction Machine) and Iron Mike Sweeney (The Pine Deep Trilogy).

     Suspenseful, surprising, sometimes dark, sometimes humorous-these all-new stories will ensure that readers never think of vampires (or birthdays) in quite the same way again. In New York Times bestselling author Charlaine Harris's "Dracula Night," Sookie Stackhouse is the only human at the annual commemoration of Dracula's birth. But this year, the Prince of Darkness actually shows up-and finds Sookie to be a tasty-looking present. New York Times bestselling author Jim Butcher's crime-solving wizard Harry Dresden, of the Dresden Files novels, heads to a role-playing party to give his vampire brother a birthday present in "It's My Birthday Too," only to discover there are some bloodthirsty party crashers who don't share their brotherly love. In "Twilight," Cassandra DuCharme, who appeared in New York Times bestselling author Kelley Armstrong's Dime Store Magic, knows she has to kill to live as a vampire another year-but finds herself disturbingly disinterested in the hunt. Plus ten more bloody good birthday stories that take the cake.Contents xi • Preface: A Few Words (Many Bloody Returns) • (2007) • essay by Charlaine Harris and Toni L. P. Kelner1 • Dracula Night • [Sookie Stackhouse 4.3] • shortstory by Charlaine Harris21 • The Mournful Cry of Owls • novelette by Christopher Golden50 • I Was a Teenage Vampire • novelette by Bill Crider73 • Twilight • [Women of the Otherworld Short Fiction 7.2] • novelette by Kelley Armstrong100 • It's My Birthday, Too • [The Dresden Files 9.2] • novella by Jim Butcher146 • Grave-Robbed • [Vampire Files] • novelette by P. N. Elrod176 • The First Day of the Rest of Your Life • [The Morganville Vampires: Extras 2.5] • novelette by Rachel Caine201 • The Witch and the Wicked • novelette by Jeanne C. Stein230 • Blood Wrapped • [Henry Fitzroy] • novelette by Tanya Huff254 • The Wish • shortstory by Carolyn Haines265 • Fire Ice and Linguini for Two • [Garnet Lacey 2.5] • novelette by Lyda Morehouse [as by Tate Hallaway ]290 • Vampire Hours • novelette by Elaine Viets318 • How Stella Got Her Grave Back • novelette by Toni L. P. Kelner

    It's a tale filled with so much adventure, so much excitement, so much vocabulary, that all who read it will suffer a fit of giddiness that will freak out everyone in their general vicinity. It's the saga of Randall, a squire assigned to escort the lovely Princess Janice on a diplomatic journey of utmost importance. Then she gets killed. Now Randall must overcome desperate odds and ridiculous dangers in his quest to bring her back to life...before the entire Generic Fantasy Land falls into the evil clutches of The Dark One! Packed to the bursting point with unrestrained silliness (so be sure to hold it a safe distance from your face when reading), How to Rescue a Dead Princess is the novel all the really cool people are reading this year, an epic fantasy for your family to cherish approximately forever.

    The authors patterned them after Lord Dunsany's "Jorkens" stories. The Gavagan's stories are widely considered classics.Contents:· Preface · pr · Elephas Frumenti [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss F&SF Win/Spr ’50 · The Ancestral Amethyst [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss F&SF Aug ’52 · Here, Putzi! [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Tales from Gavagan’s Bar, Twayne, 1953 · More Than Skin Deep [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss F&SF Apr ’51 · Beasts of Bourbon [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss F&SF Oct ’51 · The Gift of God [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss F&SF Win/Spr ’50 · The Better Mousetrap [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss F&SF Dec ’50 · No Forwarding Address [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Tales from Gavagan’s Bar, Twayne, 1953 · The Untimely Toper [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss F&SF Jul ’53 · The Eve of St. John [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Tales from Gavagan’s Bar, Twayne, 1953 · The Love Nest [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Tales from Gavagan’s Bar, Twayne, 1953 · The Stone of the Sages [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Tales from Gavagan’s Bar, Twayne, 1953 · Corpus Delectable [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Tales from Gavagan’s Bar, Twayne, 1953 · The Palimpsest of St. Augustine [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Tales from Gavagan’s Bar, Twayne, 1953 · Where to, Please? [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Weird Tales Sep ’52 · Methought I Heard a Voice [“When the Night Wind Howls”; Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Weird Tales Nov ’51 · One Man’s Meat [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss F&SF Sep ’53 · My Brother’s Keeper [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Tales from Gavagan’s Bar, Twayne, 1953 · A Dime Brings You Success [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Tales from Gavagan’s Bar, Twayne, 1953 · Oh, Say! Can You See [“Ward of the Argonaut”; Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Fantastic Universe Jan ’59 · The Rape of the Lock [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss F&SF Feb ’52 · Bell, Book, and Candle [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Fantastic Universe Oct ’59 · All That Glitters [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Tales from Gavagan’s Bar, Twayne, 1953 · Gin Comes in Bottles [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Tales from Gavagan’s Bar, Twayne, 1953 · There’d Be Thousands in It [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss * · The Black Ball [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss F&SF Oct ’52 · The Green Thumb [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss F&SF Feb ’53 · Caveat Emptor [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss Weird Tales Mar ’53 · The Weissenbroch Spectacles [Gavagan’s Bar] · ss F&SF Nov ’54

    Ten years later, she’s built herself a new life, but all that is threatened when Mirror Boy returns, warning of danger. A hunter has come for both of them, and unless Lynette can figure out what’s going on, they will both perish.Read JY Yang's Tor.com Original short story, Circus Girl, The Hunter, and Mirror Boy.At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.

    Especially when you're a newbie at shapeshifting.Luckily, there's a group called Shapeshifters Anonymous that will help you work through the difficult times, like eating your friends, and shedding.When recently turned werewolf Robert Weston Smith discovers his new found abilities in a humorous (but alarming) way, he seeks out the support group to help him figure things out. There he meets various characters who transform into assorted, odd things, including a sexy werecheetah named Irena. But little did Weston know he'd been followed to this private gathering, by someone who wants to do the therianthropes a great deal of harm...Shapeshifters Anonymous is a 12,000 word novella, specifically formatted for Nook. It contains a handful of werepeople, a dash of romance, some gratuitous humor, and revisionist Xmas theories. It also has previews of Konrath's other work.

    He scavenges what he can from what's left over. He is very careful in what he does and where he goes, taking no chances, no unnecessary risks, and weighing every choice... until he decides to visit the hospital at the edge of town, and experiences terror the likes he's never encountered before. A short story of approximately 9500 words, or 29 pages. The first story of the "Mountain Man" series. Contains language and graphic violence. This short story also appears in the horror fiction novella "Cauldron Gristle."If you enjoy this, check out the novels "Mountain Man" and "Safari," the next books in the series.Series order:The Hospital (short story)Mountain ManSafari (Coming in time for Christmas) Hellifax

    Not sure which.Being an undead, eternally pasty fifteen-year-old isn't quite the sexy, brooding, angst-fest Jane always imagined...Helen Keeble’s riotous debut novel combines the humor of Vladimir Tod with Ally Carter’s spot-on teen voice. With a one-of-a-kind vampire mythology and an irresistibly relatable undead heroine, this uproarious page-turner will leave readers bloodthirsty for more.

    Some days all of Claire’s house mates were all in, most days nobody was; some days there was food in the fridge. Most days, not. Claire had made a fine art out of scrounging up crackers and cans of soup. Her favorite was cream of tomato. Yum. Follow the link to read full short.I rarely wrote stories from Claire’s point of view, mainly because she’s the main character in the books, so it seemed redundant to have her take the lead in the shorts, too. But I did enjoy it from time to time, like in this short story (free on the website) that just gives us a taste of the romance building between Claire and Shane. This is set in that late-romance period somewhere around Feast of Fools when things are hot … but not yet reaching the boil that they would in Carpe Corpus.One of Shane’s many terrible jobs is featured, which is always fun for me. Poor Shane. Poor bosses.

    Abigail hopes that her birthday will slip by unnoticed and uncelebrated, but her employer, detective of the supernatural R. F. Jackaby, has other plans. Using magical party crackers that teleport the pair to unknown destinations in time and space and a cryptic map that may lead to a forgotten treasure, Jackaby intends to give Abigail what he considers to be the best gift of all--adventure. Abigail and Jackaby must tame an enormous (and carnivorous) rabbit, defend a castle, and master a dirigible if they want to find the treasure and get back to New Fiddleham alive.