And when Maurice turns Reginald to save his life, it's just Reginald's own further bad luck that he wakes up to discover he's become the slowest, weakest, most out-of-shape vampire ever born, doomed to "heal" to his corpulent self for all of eternity.As Reginald struggles with the downsides of being a fat vampire -- too slow to catch people to feed on, mocked by those he tries to glamour, assaulted by his intended prey and left for undead -- he discovers in himself rare powers that few vampires have… and just in time too, because the Vampire Council might just want his head for being an inferior representative of their race. Fat Vampire is the story of an unlikely hero who, after having an imperfect eternity shoved into his grease-stained hands, must learn to turn the afterlife's lemons into tasty lemon danishes.

    The most authentic edition of Chaucer's Complete Works available.- The fruit of years of scholarship by an international team of experts- A new foreword by Christopher Cannon introduces students to recent developments in Chaucer Studies- A detailed introduction covers Chaucer's life, works, language, and verse- Includes on-the-page glosses, explanatory notes, textual notes, bibliography, and a glossary

    . . - Every enemy's weaknesses exposed - Expert hints on close combat, long-range attacks, and magic spells - Where to find health power-ups when you need them the most - In-depth walkthrough featuring maps for every area, for both PS(R) 2 and XboxTM - Secrets to getting what you want from the NPCs - Exclusive interviews with the art director and Tolkien experts - How to use the Ring to reveal secret areas filled with power-ups

    Feminist cartoonist Robbins takes off the gloves and tells the tales of twenty not-so-sweet, totally immoderate, and utterly enjoyable goddesses, including Jezebel, Kali, and others.

     Includes: -Why Hank came to Belvaille -Hank's first job -Where Hank got his plasma pistol -Hank's first murder -Introduction of glocken -Where the Gentleman's Club and Athletic Club came from -Hank's first love -How and why Belvaille changed and became what it is today NOTE: while the stories are stand-alone, it contains many references to characters and events in Hard Luck Hank novels.

    In fact music hasn't just accompanied his life, it's been an integral part of it.In the bestselling and award-winning tradition of This Boy, In My Life vividly transports us to a world that is no longer with us - a world of Dansettes and jukeboxes, of heartfelt love songs and heart-broken ballads, of smoky coffee shops and dingy dance halls. From Bob Dylan to David Bowie, from Lonnie Donnegan to Bruce Springsteen, all of Alan's favourites are here. As are, of course, his beloved Beatles, whom he has worshipped with undying admiration since 1963.But this isn't just a book about music. In My Life adds a fourth dimension to the story of Alan Johnson the man.

    . . forever. Through the eyes of Cormac O'Connor -- granted immortality as long as he never leaves the island of Manhattan -- we watch New York grow from a tiny settlement on the tip of an untamed wilderness to the thriving metropolis of today. And through Cormac's remarkable adventures in both love and war, we come to know the city's buried secrets -- the way it has been shaped by greed, race, and waves of immigration, by the unleashing of enormous human energies, and, above all, by hope.

    Campbell Award for Best New Writer, Locus Awards for Best Novella and Best Critic, and numerous other awards. Twenty-four of his 30 books are still in print, in 10 languages. His short work has appeared in magazines around the planet, from Omni and Analog to Xhurnal Izobretatel i Rationalizator (Moscow), and in numerous anthologies. His most recent books are the novels Callahan's Key, and The Free Lunch.Contents:God Is an Iron (1979)In the Olden Days (1984)Local Champ (1979)Melancholy Elephants (1982)Not Fade Away (1982)Orphans of Eden (1996)Rubber Soul (1982)Soul Search (1979)Stardance (1977) with Jeanne RobinsonThe Magnificent Conspiracy (1977)

    She proclaims, in her delightfully urbane, witty, and very English way, that it is time to look at our commas and semicolons and see them as the wonderful and necessary things they are. Using examples from literature, history, neighborhood signage, and her own imagination, Truss shows how meaning is shaped by commas and apostrophes, and the hilarious consequences of punctuation gone awry.Featuring a foreword by Frank McCourt, and interspersed with a lively history of punctuation from the invention of the question mark in the time of Charlemagne to George Orwell shunning the semicolon, Eats, Shoots & Leaves makes a powerful case for the preservation of proper punctuation.

    

    their doctors."It was the dog who found me."Such is the stark confession launching the harrowing scene that begins The Asylum for Wayward Victorian Girls as Emilie Autumn, a young musician on the verge of a bright career, attempts suicide by overdosing on the antipsychotics prescribed to treat her bipolar disorder. Upon being discovered, Emilie is revived and immediately incarcerated in a maximum-security psych ward, despite her protestations that she is not crazy, and can provide valid reasons for her actions if someone would only listen.Treated as a criminal, heavily medicated, and stripped of all freedoms, Emilie is denied communication with the outside world, and falls prey to the unwelcome attentions of Dr. Sharp, head of the hospital's psychiatry department. As Dr. Sharp grows more predatory by the day, Emilie begins a secret diary to document her terrifying experience, and to maintain her sanity in this environment that could surely drive anyone mad. But when Emilie opens her notebook to find a desperate letter from a young woman imprisoned within an insane asylum in Victorian England, and bearing her own name and description, a portal to another world is blasted wide open.As these letters from the past continue to appear, Emilie escapes further into this mysterious alternate reality where sisterhoods are formed, romance between female inmates blossoms, striped wallpaper writhes with ghosts, and highly intellectual rats speak the Queen's English.But is it real? Or is Emilie truly as mad as she is constantly told she is?The Asylum for Wayward Victorian Girls blurs harsh reality and magical historical fantasy whilst issuing a scathing critique of society's treatment of women and the mental health care industry's treatment of its patients, showing in the process that little has changed throughout the ages.Welcome to the Asylum. Are you committed?

    Paul Muldoon, the distinguished poet and international literary eminence, has selected -- from a pool of several thousand published candidates -- the top seventy-five poems of the year. With insightful comments from the poets illuminating their work, and series editor David Lehman's perspicacious foreword, The Best American Poetry 2005 is indispensable for every poetry enthusiast.

    Steeple’s dream of a totalitarian America under his hand as benevolent dictator can now become a reality, even if it means making common cause with America’s mortal enemies. No treachery is too great to fulfill his ambitions, and those of his friends.But American patriotism doesn’t die that easily, and Steeple just might find out that men and women still exist to protect those who can’t protect themselves. Regardless of the odds, some people take their service oaths seriously, even unto death.Such courage always has a cost, though, and this time the cost is high.

    Within its shadowy depths the greatest of the old gods had carved a world unto himself. A place unrivaled in its beauty, obscurity, and danger.Trapped within The Fold, under the tutelage of the last arkeinists, Aeden must overcome his greatest obstacle, or die trying.

    Suddenly, this longtime church member and pillar of her small Southern community finds herself in the center of an unseemly scandal-and the guardian of a wan nine-year-old whose mere presence turns her life upside down. With razor-sharp wit and perfect "Steel Magnolia" poise, Miss Julia speaks her mind indeed-about a robbery, a kidnapping, and the other disgraceful events precipitated by her husband's death. Miss Julia Takes Over - Miss Julia has come to terms with her onetime rival, Hazel Marie, and is now the guardian of Little Lloyd. Now Hazel Marie has disappeared, and Miss Julia has to find her. With Little Lloyd by her side, she sets off across North Carolina, and encounters enough obstacles and adventures to tax even Miss Julia's amazing and ingenious survival skills.