He talks to the models, he reads hundreds of filthy readers' letters, he organises the photoshoots and even gets to direct the action. He has, according to his non-porn friends, "the best job in the world". But Godfrey Bishop has a problem. Godfrey Bishop is going through the sex drought to end all sex droughts. He hasn't been with a woman in over a year and this knee-twisting frustration is magnified a hundred times by his daily grind. He feels like Billy Bunter put in charge of the cake shop, only to have the Atkins diet forced upon him at gun point. Chuck into the mix a twelve girl orgy, a stable of alcoholic co-workers, an angry argumentative feminist, a naked run from justice and an obsessive nutty reader who thinks Godfrey is trying to scupper his chances of marrying the magazine's centre-spread girl and you have Danny King's filthiest and funniest novel yet – according to the back of the book. Godfrey Bishop has "the best job in the world" – and it's doing his f*cking head in.

     Only to wake back up as a twelve-year-old! With time rewound and a second chance at life dropped into her lap, she sets out to right the countless wrongs that plague the ailing Empire. Corrupt governance? Check. Border troubles? Check. Natural calamities and economic strife? Check. My, seems like a lot of work. Hard work and Mia don’t mix, so she seeks out the aid of others, starting with her loyal maid, Anne, and the brilliant minister, Ludwig. Together, they strive day and night to restore the Empire. Little by little, their tireless efforts begin to change the course of history, pushing the whole of the continent toward a new future. And why did the selfish princess have a change of heart, you ask? Simple—she didn’t. She’s just terrified of the guillotine. They hurt like hell, and Mia hates pain more than work. Lazy, selfish, and a complete coward, the ill-equipped princess of the Tearmoon Empire, armed with memories of her past life and a diary from the future, tries to avoid dying at the guillotine again and changes the very course of history in the process!

    . . until Dottie’s given a free trip to Las Vegas. Second-grade teacher Dottie Gale lives in the tiny town of Quandary, Kansas, which is pretty much smack dab in the middle of nowhere. No mountains. No ocean. No life. Her ex-boyfriend and current school board member, Corbin Lane, cheated on her, making school functions more than a little awkward. But worst of all, a tornado named Maxine Westward rips through Dottie’s school as the new principal and has made her life at work a living hell. When Dottie is chosen to go to a teacher’s conference in Las Vegas, she knows her life is going to change. Driving from Quandary to Vegas, three strangers enter her life. Through a string of situations involving poppies, flying monkeys, and a life-size sculpture of an iconic rock star the four soon become inseparable. So, when Westward arrives on her broom in Vegas, Dottie is ready for battle. Her boss black mails her with stories of incarceration, thievery, and a steamy relationship with her travel companion, but Dottie knows that those who hurl insults shouldn’t hold secrets of their own. Editorial Reviews "I had so much fun reading this and spotting all the clever twists, it was very entertaining. In fact I’m tempted to re-read it, to find more of the subtle hints. I’ve also been to a few of the places mentioned in the book which meant an extra thumbs up for me. I would definitely recommend to readers who enjoy a modern take on a good original oldie." Roses are Amber

    When he opens his eyes, though, he sees a beautiful goddess that offers him a once in an after-lifetime chance to be reborn in a parallel world. The catch is that the world is violent and threatened by a growing evil! Fortunately, he can choose any one thing to bring with him. So he chooses the goddess, Aqua! And so his adventure with his gorgeous companion begins--if he could just get enough money and food to survive, keep his goddess out of trouble, and avoid grabbing the attention of the Demon King's army!

     One family. A tiny flat in Notting Hill. A beautiful neighbour. A very angry dog. A horny Welshman. An enormous turkey. On the biggest day of the year. What could possibly go wrong? Meet Ben Canterbury, 29, single, lives in a poky flat in Notting Hill with horny Welshman, Rufus. His life has been one disappointment after another. What makes it worse is that his brother, Jamie, is the complete opposite - a Barrister to Ben’s Barista - with a family and a proper house in Twickenham. In an attempt to compete with his perfect brother, Ben insists he hosts the family Christmas, but it isn’t long before he realises he’s way out of his depth. Ben’s flat isn't big enough for everyone (including one very angry dog), the Christmas tree’s from the £1 shop, the decorations are hung with Blu-Tack, and the turkey might not fit in the oven. Ben’s definitely not feeling the Christmas spirit. But when beautiful new neighbour, Mhairi McGregor, appears at his door, Ben’s Christmas worries go out of the window and he begins to wonder if it might not be the worst Christmas in history after all. Amid all the drama, drinking and carnage of Christmas Day, will Ben find true love or will it be another disappointment to add to the list? A Notting Hill Christmas is a brilliantly funny, feel-good, festive novella perfect for fans of romantic comedies like Love Actually and Notting Hill.

    The government sees a great chance to make a profit, if they can keep the secret long enough to corner the market on exports to the Holy Eldant Empire, their point of first contact with this new land.The people of the Eldant Empire, though, only have eyes for one of Japan’s traditional exports: pop culture. When it quickly becomes evident that government bureaucrats and “Japanimation” don’t really mix, the bigwigs realize they’re going to need help bringing “otaku culture” to the Eldant masses.Enter Amutech, a purveyor of “general entertainment” that’s secretly run by the Japanese government. Shinichi lands a job as the company’s general manager, whereupon he learns the state’s biggest secret. Now he finally has a chance to put his nerd know-how to good use spreading the otaku gospel in the Eldant Empire. And wait... he has to work with a half-elf maid, an empress, AND a female soldier to get the job done?

    "People? Visible Toka Did you mean ghost," "I was just talking with my friends. Air with my friends!" Friends in the "(useless's guy ...)" Kotaka is but he discuss whether you can have friends What if the night sky, the night sky is useless action force It would make up disappointing part that aims to make. And come to join the club What wrong or one after another disappointing beautiful girl who is -. Awfully fun shame-based youth romantic comedy birth but everyone is either GYARUGE of various and vagus feeling or doing you can play go to the pool or doing they really make friends with? Deviant.Original:学校で浮いている羽瀬川小鷹は、ある時いつも不機嫌そうな美少女の三日月夜空が一人で楽しげに喋っているのを目撃する。「もしかして幽霊とか見える人?」「友達と話していただけだ。エア友達と!」「(駄目だこいつ…)」小鷹は夜空とどうすれば友達が出来るか話し合うのだが、夜空は無駄な行動力で友達作りを目指す残念な部まで作ってしまう。しかも何を間違ったか続々と残念な美少女達が入部してきて―。みんなでギャルゲーをやったりプールに行ったり演劇をやったり色々と迷走気味な彼らは本当に友達を作れるのか?アレげだけどやけに楽しい残念系青春ラブコメディ誕生。

    

    1965.  War's found himself deep in the glamorous yet lethal world of international espionage. Unhappy with both the treachery and restrictive dress-code, when a name from the past reappears in his life War realises he must risk everything to keep the world safe once again. This short story follows on from the How To Be Dead series and continues the tale of everybody's favourite grumpy Horseman of the Apocalypse...  What Amazon readers are saying about the How To Be Dead Comedy Fantasy Series: ★★★★★ “Dave Turner is a funny man and ‘How To Be Dead’ is a brilliant read.”★★★★★ “If Neil Gaiman and Simon Pegg sat down to write a story together they might come up with something like this.”★★★★★ “Hilarious and unexpectedly moving.”★★★★★ "Laughs and excitement combined!"★★★★★ “Laugh out loud funny… It’s been a while since an author has made me laugh more than Pratchett does.”★★★★★ "If you like Tom Holt, Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett, Dave Turner's books will fit perfectly into your collection."

    Fie, first princess of Daeman, finds herself isolated and stranded in the foreign Kingdom of Orstoll all by her lonesome - effectively having been wed off as a dowry gift in accessory to her sister, Princess Fielle's marriage.Trapped and isolated in a small back garden that once used to be a storehouse, Fie lives her days without purpose, and eventually without food - after the only member of her entourage, the chef, resigns.Just as Fie was about to give in to despair, she finds a pamphlet advertising a squire's test for the Royal Knights of Orstoll - beginning her journey of friendship, hard work, and guts, along with masquerading as a boy to walk her second path in life.What will Fie find along the way?

    Belgrieve finds this out the hard way when a deadly encounter robs him of his leg and the ability to pursue his dreams not long after setting off for fame and fortune. But fate isn’t finished with this retired adventurer! While gathering herbs in the wilderness, he discovers an abandoned baby girl and names her Angeline after deciding to raise her as his own. Angeline grows up to become a top-tier adventurer in her own right, yet after venturing out into the world and making a name for herself, fame, fortune, and power hold no allure for the accomplished S-rank adventurer: her heartfelt wish is for nothing more than to see her father again.

    Despite the fact that he's kind of a screw-up, the competition to hook up with him is fierce, and hilarious cat-fights ensue. An already tumultuous living situation escalates to an uproar when Keitaro and the girls get the news that their home will transform into a commercial inn, with strangers from outside their school as guests!

    Okay yes, all that stuff too, but I'm not talking about that right now. The government has also been lying to us about space aliens. Aliens have landed on the National Mall and are asking to speak with the President of the United States. For the sake of the planet, diplomat Michael Wallenson is tasked with keeping them away from Donald Trump at all costs. Will Michael succeed? Or will these heavily armed, easily offended aliens succeed in reaching our leader? Building the border dome, coal-powered missiles, and the true identities of the men in black - all in Take Us To Your Trump, another hilarious satirical comedy from author Andrew Stanek.

    WHAT are the dangers of getting directions from a fairy tale frog? WHERE do archangels go to kick back and relax? HOW can a garden gnome mend a broken heart? WHO is the last person you’d expect to visit you at Christmas? WHY shouldn’t you let Satan organise your funeral? Find out the answers to these and other pressing questions in this collection of short stories from the authors of the Clovenhoof series.

    In this world of ours……the first to die are those without guts.A portion of humanity has obtained special abilities, and two groups emerge in conflict. On the side of justice are "heroes." On the side of villainy are "monsters." For Chiaki, however, all that matters is finding work to support his younger brothers. But when a simple train ride to his latest interview takes a perverse turn, his sense of right leads him down an unexpected and uncomfortable path! From the mind of Prison School creator Akira Hiramoto comes a raw new story of a man caught between good and evil, lies and truth—and light and shadow!"