A collection of stories, poems,letters (all to Harry Secombe), fairy tales and a section headed 'Politics And Other Nonsense'.

    Celebrating the grouch in everyone, the Grumpy Cat book teaches the fine art of grumpiness and includes enough bad attitude to cast a dark cloud over the whole world. Featuring brand new as well as classic photos, and including grump-inspiring activities and games, Grumpy Cat delivers unmatched, hilarious grumpiness that puts any bad mood in perspective.

    Imagine, then, the excitement that Howard Carson, an amateur archeologist at best, experienced when in crossing the perimeter of an abandoned excavation site he felt the ground give way beneath him and found himself at the bottom of a shaft, which, judging from the DO NOT DISTURB sign hanging from an archaic doorknob, was clearly the entrance to a still-sealed burial chamber. Carson's incredible discoveries, including the remains of two bodies, one of then on a ceremonial bed facing an altar that appeared to be a means of communicating with the Gods and the other lying in a porcelain sarcophagus in the Inner Chamber, permitted him to piece together the whole fabric of that extraordinary civilization.

    It's teeming with savages, thugs, angry toddlers, and disgruntled clowns. And every one of them is secretly mulling a scenario that ends with them kicking you square in the junk. What do you do if you want to take on The Batman and live to brag about it to your kids? What do you do if a rabid alligator picks a fight with your little sister? What do you do if the beloved star of "Forrest Gump" tells you to "shut the hell up" in front of a huge crowd?You read this book. It offers simple, effective instructions for beating up zombies, robots, co-workers—anything. The only limits are your imagination... and your habit of not following through on things, and possibly your uncoordinated, at times comically frail body.

    Little does she know the joy that Peewee will bring into her life. Follow the adventures of Peewee the Playful Puppy! What kinds of adventures will Lizzie and Peewee get into? These stories are great for quick bedtime stories and cute tales to be read aloud with friends and family! Excellent for early readers Includes fun games & activities for kids Great for reading aloud with friends and family Illustrated story book great for a quick bedtime story Funny and hilarious jokes for kids FREE book download included (see inside link) This books is especially great for traveling, waiting rooms, and reading aloud at home. Fun for Everyone in the Family! Kids and children can practice their reading skills or have a parent read the stories aloud to them. These fun stories are great for early and beginner readers. The stories are cute and easy to read and the illustrations are great for younger readers! Story List & Activities: Peewee’s New Friend Just for Fun Activity Peewee and the Squirrel Just for Fun Activity Lizzie Makes Gingerbread Cookies Peewee’s First Snow Peewee Meets Tiger Just for Fun Activity Funny Cat and Dog Jokes Games FREE Coloring Book Downloads Your child will be entertained for hours! *** FREE GIFT with your purchase! *** (see inside for link)Free children's book download included! See offer inside. Scroll up and click 'buy' and spend some quality time with your child! 100% Money Back Guaranteetags: children books, children chapter books, children story books, books children, free children kindle books, educational books for children, children joke books, picture books for children, children animal books, young childrens books, kindle books for kids, kids books, fantasy books for kids age 9 12, kid books, free kindle books for kids, books for kids ages 4-8, kids books on sale, best selling books for kids, good kids books, new books for kids, fun kids books, kindle kids books, kids picture books, bedtime stories for kindle, bedtime story, funny bedtime stories, bedtime stories for kids, animals, animal stories, animal pictures, storytelling animal, beginning readers kindergarten books for kids, stories for kids, stories for children, kids ebooks, short stories, bedtime stories, kids books, ebooks, childrens books, childrens book, kindle unlimited, kindle unlimited books for kids, kindle unlimited books for children, humor, early reader, beginning reader, kids comedy, bedtime stories, free ebooks, ebooks free, stories for kids, preschool, ages 3-5, ages 6-8, ages 9-12, preteen, beginning readers, beginner reading

    What really happens when you give in to your child's tantrums? The events that follow this seemingly simple act will test parents to the breaking point…while entertaining the millions of us who have been there ourselves (and lived to tell). Also a cautionary and instructive tale for new parents, If You Give a Kid a Cookie, Will He Shut the F**k Up? is a must-have for every family library collection. Just keep it on the top shelf.

     With gorgeous watercolor illustrations and a fun, sing-song rhythm, your children are sure to love this journey of a little red balloon. Recommended for children aged 2 - 5

    His stable is a matchbox with a tic-tac box conservatory and with a cocktail stick, some cotton and a hawthorn berry, Tim can play swingball.

    The Lisa Book.Whether she's extolling the virtues of vegetarianism and the global village, raising awareness about the world's moral and social ills, or simply playing with her Malibu Stacy doll and dreaming of ponies, Lisa Simpson is a role model for the 21st century! Discover Lisa's lifelong ambitions, gather snappy answers to environmentally insensitive questions, uncover "the Truth" by logging onto her Internet blog, and follow along as she solves a real mystery. From the benefits of being Teacher's Pet to the secret correspondences of Commander–in–chief Lisa's presidential administration you will explore the inner workings of one of America's most progressive eight–year–old minds.The Simpsons Library of WisdomMatt Groening, the creator of "The Simpsons," offers an on–going series of portable and quotable books that will eliminate the need for all religions and philosophies, exalt man's role in the universe, and make the world a better place...sort of. No other television show in history has commented so freely and so humorously on modern times, and there seems to be no end in sight for the sharp satire and pointed parody that The Simpsons serves up every night of the week all around the world.

    "Know all the sunny places.""Flaunt your hair loss.""Get mad when you're stepped on.""Take some time to eat the flowers.""Be tolerant-but not overly accommodating.""Make your own hours.""Scratch when it itches.""Depend on others without losing your independence.""Avoid company you do not like."Altogether, here are over 90 simple life lessons, irresistibly illustrated in full-color. Proving what all cat fanciers suspect about their own pets, Suzy Becker's cat is a fount of wisdom. The book covers everything from grooming, health, and diet to being completely well-adjusted, and imparts perhaps the most valuable piece of advice a cat could give: "There is always time for a nap."

    All Rights Reserved.The Far Side and the Larson signature are registered trademarks of FarWorks, Inc.The Far Side Gallery is an anthology of Gary Larson's The Far Side comic strips, which were printed from 1982–1984.

     3k words, 6 color illustrations, perfect for emergent readers!

    Gackley creates hysterical parodies of children’s book covers from more innocent times. Many of these original books focus on life’s lessons, joys, and curiosities. Gackley cleverly takes the books’ classic covers and turns them into unforgettable, edgy, politicaly incorrect parodies that speak to the bad little kid in all of us. With a catalog of children’s book titles like Peeping Tommy Goes Cougar Hunting, Cousin Milky Is Lactose Intolerant, and The Blind Child’s Picture Dictionary, this collection will have readers in stitches. A fun read for parents, grown-ups, and kids-at-heart everywhere, Bad Little Children’s Books leaves no bad joke unmade.

    You know where you can go? The f**k to sleep.”Go the Fuck to Sleep is a book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate, and radically honest, it captures the familiar—and unspoken—tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night. Read by a host of celebrities, from Samuel L. Jackson to Jennifer Garner, this subversively funny bestselling storybook will not actually put your kids to sleep, but it will leave you laughing so hard you won’t care.

    Now the punk-rock papa is proud to share some of his story time with the world, through the release of his first children’s book THE LONELY ASTRONAUT ON CHRISTMAS EVE. This book, written by DeLonge, is a wistful story for the young and the young-at-heart alike. Wonderfully illustrated by Mike Henry, THE LONELY ASTRONAUT ON CHRISTMAS EVE, is a tale of a rocketeer alone on the moon on a cold Christmas night, and the gift he receives from a few unexpected (and extraterrestrial) friends.