Sweet and proper, Karah's future seems secure at a glamorous Flower House. She could be pampered for the rest of her life... if she agrees to play their game.Nemienne, neither sweet nor proper, has fewer choices. Left with no alternative, she accepts a mysterious mage's offer of an apprenticeship. Agreeing means a home and survival, but can Nemienne trust the mage? With the arrival of a foreign bard into the quiet city, dangerous secrets are unearthed, and both sisters find themselves at the center of a plot that threatens not only to upset their newly found lives, but also to destroy their kingdom.

    It is a totally inappropriate book about a completely dysfunctional family. The F word flies free along with many other curse words. Feel free to get drunk (because the Davenports sure are!) while you’re reading it, and prepare to wet yourself laughing. If sex scenes are not your thing, this book might not be your thing. But, if you have a crazy sense of humor and like raunchy comedies - you’re in the right place. Join in on the craziness of The Crazy Rich Davenport Family. Lucy’s husband Mark, died a year ago. Her life and her families has been steadily going downhill and things have gotten a little out of control, to say the least. When her daughter plans a birthday party for her half-sister. Lucy decides it’s time they all get their act together, but not everyone is on the same page.There will be dildos and strawberries flying in the air, along with firecrackers, curse words, and little blue pills being slipped into drinks - hard-ons for everyone! Lucy’s hope for normal in her dysfunctional family will never happen and things only get worse when Mark’s snooty parents drop a bombshell that will only spark more insanity from The Crazy Rich Davenport family.Hold on for the ride and laughter that ensues.

    Celebrating the creative side of failure in a way we can all relate to, F in Exams gathers the most hilarious and inventive test answers provided by students who, faced with a question they have no hope of getting right, decide to have a little fun instead. Whether in science (Q: What is the highest frequency noise that a human can register? A: Mariah Carey), the humanities (Q: What did Mahatma Gandhi and Genghis Khan have in common? A: Unusual names), math, or other subjects, these 250 entries prove that while everyone enjoys the spectacle of failure, it's even sweeter to see a FAIL turn into a WIN.

    But following his break-up with long-term girlfriend, Stacey, he finds himself single again. He's been out of the game for a while and is a little out of practice. Soon, the very irregular and increasingly worrying issue in Dan's life is the extended drought he finds himself suffering. And we're not talking the climate change, scorched earth, God I'm parched variety. You've got to hand it to Dan though - it certainly isn't from a lack of trying. With stalwart mates Ollie, Jack and Rob on hand to lend their collective pearls of male wisdom and arrange the odd road trip, you'd think Dan's days of languishing in a sexual wilderness would be numbered. Even best friends can't help prevent the kind of surreal holes Dan just can't seem to help digging himself into. And with each failed attempt, his self-esteem plummets to the point where he wonders if 'little Dan' will ever work again. Good job he has Kelly, his reliable and sympathetic colleague, to confide in. As a woman, she can perhaps shed some female light on why he's failing so miserably with the opposite sex, balancing out the testosterone-fuelled 'advice' from the lads. Surely Dan can't go wrong with Kelly teaching him the various intricacies of a woman's mind. Steven Scaffardi's first novel will have every guy laughing out loud in recognition and every girl secretly worrying - is this how men really think? A new talent to watch out for on the 'lad-lit' scene.

    The only romance on her agenda is what she's writing in her secret novel, but sometimes romance can't be avoided.Especially when your new neighbor is the insanely handsome and all around nice guy, Jameson Lane. He's everything a woman could want in a man, but Millie doesn't want a man. Not now; not ever. Too bad her heart didn't get the memo.

    A traitor has set free eight Lore, the spirits of what humans know as fairy tales, and they are making their way to Slumber to awaken their descendants. In order to save her home, the lives of her family, and all of humanity, Madly must learn to wield her exceptional powers and recapture the Lore before it’s too late and all is lost. But Madly’s only help are her two best friends and the Sentinel, Jackson Hamilton, that threatens both her heart and her destiny. Madly has loved Jackson as long as she can remember, but he is the one thing even a princess can’t have. Can she resist love to become the queen she was fated to be? Or can she find a way to have both?This novelette introduces you to Madly and prepares you for the quest of a lifetime

    Witty and irreverent, Horseradish is a book with universal appeal, a delightful vehicle to introduce Snicket's uproariously unhappy observations to a crowd not yet familiar with the Baudelaires' misadventures.

    In school, we're taught the basics about how the world works. But sometimes, we just need to dig a little deeper. That's where The Book of Unusual Knowledge comes in. The stories within this volume shed some light on the extraordinary things that the human mind can conceive. You'll discover amazing information about animals and intriguing tidbits about some of today's most revered institutions. What could cause a man to bury ten Cadillacs nose down in a pasture? Why did the king of Prussia assemble an "elite" infantry unit composed entirely of unusually tall men? Find the answers to these questions in the pages that follow.

    I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging dickhead. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world. —from the IntroductionActual reader feedback: "I find it truly appalling that there are people in the world like you. You are a disgusting, vile, repulsive, repugnant, foul creature. Because of you, I don't believe in God anymore. No just God would allow someone like you to exist." "I'll stay with God as my lord, but you are my savior. I just finished reading your brilliant stories, and I laughed so hard I almost vomited. I want to bring that kind of joy to people. You're an artist of the highest order and a true humanitarian to boot. I'm in both shock and awe at how much I want to be you." Now with 16 Pages of Photos and a New Introduction

    She would rather be anywhere than Samford, Louisiana, the small southern town where she once spent the worst month of her life. Most of all, she wants to move on to the art gallery job that is waiting for her in Denver. To fulfill the obligation she feels to her uncle and get on with the life she dreams of, Camille needs to entice a group of rural landowners to sell their mineral rights---and allow use of their precious water for the drilling of natural gas. Instead, she finds herself drawn to the local folk art created by those same landowners, and attracted to Marsh Cameron, the attorney representing them. Camille must decide whether family obligation---and her own plans for her future---are more important than the lives and tradition of this small community.