Best of
Surreal

2011

The Tally


E.G. Wolverson - 2011
    Welcome to a world of crude cartoon and misplaced melodrama; a world free of all but the most trifling of consequences, where exaggerated sensitivity is rife and a semester’s success or suicide hangs on the whim of a woman. Young Tommo wiles away his evenings in a purple drunken stupor, lost to the tender mercies of what he desperately wishes was a hopeless love affair, but in reality isn’t even that. Gristle, meanwhile, is enraged when his weak-bladdered housemate Spadge moves out, only to be replaced by a neurotic freak named Jamal, who dares not only to bring books into his house, but to read them too.And for poor Will, matters are even worse. Women are staying in of a night! How’s he supposed to rack up his ‘tally’ of conquests if women daren’t leave their digs? They’re all terrified that they’ll be the next to fall prey to the invisible menace that has started stealing students away from the streets of Hull. Will has nothing to fear though – after all, he has his recently arrived destitute father to watch his back. And the fearsome Gristle. And the zealously neurotic Jamal. And the dangerously depressed Tom…The Student Bubble is about to burst, and when it does, the degenerate residents of 146 Worthington Street will find themselves drowning in a reality that they’re not equipped to comprehend, let alone survive in.

I Wonder What Human Flesh Tastes Like


Justin Isis - 2011
    Futuristic in outlook, up-to-the-minute in setting and sophisticated in influence, these are stories for those who feel that literature has not caught up with the 21st century.

The Weather Stations


Ryan Call - 2011
    2011 Whiting Writers' Award WinnerThe debut collection of ten short stories from Ryan Call, including stories originally published in Keyhole, The Lifted Brow, Lo-Ball, The Collagist, The Los Angeles Review, Hobart and Web Conjunctions.

The Summer Solstice and Other Stories


Nick Joaquín - 2011
    It features the title story “The Summer Solstice” as well as “The Mass of St. Sylvestre” and “The Order ofMelkizedek.”

Krazy and Ignatz, 1922-1924: At Last My Drim of Love Has Come True


George Herriman - 2011
    (Next: The dailies!)While the Krazy Kat Sundays were created and published in black and white until 1935 (and therefore the majority of strips in this book are black and white), Herriman’s publisher did briefly experiment with running the strip in color in 1924, and all 10 of these rare full-color strips are presented here. The book also includes more rare photographs of Herriman, a “DeBaffling” section explaining period references and in-jokes, and the usual surprise “goodies” each of these volumes springs on their readers. And for the 13th and last time, the covers will be by Chris Ware.

The Great Lover


Michael Cisco - 2011
    and in the black world between stations... the trains shrilly call to one another blind and massive in the dark - black rushing silence, rent by screaming trains ... Like the hideous angler fish of the ocean's deepest places, he is an otherworldly scavenger drifting in currents heavier than avalanches, slow as glaciers, a sea wasp with a bridal train of tingling nerves that drift in the sewage time and again tangling in women's dreams. From Michael Cisco, author of The Divinity Student, comes a visionary novel of eros and thanatos. The Great Lover, the sewerman, is the undead hero who nonetheless carries the torch of libido and life. Mischievous Frankenstein, uproarious cartoon demon, mascot of the subway cult, witch-doctor of feculent enchantment and weary veteran of folies d'amour, he stands, or shambles, as our last champion against the monochrome, white-noise forces of Vampirism.

Entrance to a colonial pageant in which we all begin to intricate


Johannes Göransson - 2011
    Cross-Genre. Fiction. Drama. "It would take a miracle to perform this pageant. For a start, you would have to reanimate Charlotte Bronte, Adolf Loos, and Ronald Reagan, and you would need an ungodly amount of wax. Most of the action is obscene, and therefore takes place offstage. The actors enter and report on scenes of spectacular violence that go on all the time every day. The audience is part of the spectacle too. We are all transformed into images somewhere in this script. At one point, all of Hollywood appears onstage on the form of dead horses, perhaps because Hollywood film continues to rely on narrative conventions that it exhausted long ago. The entire world also appears, played by a boy who, in a series of rapid costume changes, puts on increasingly pretty dresses"--Aaron Kunin.

Fantastic Orgy


Carlton Mellick III - 2011
    Over the past few decades, sexually transmitted diseases have evolved in unusual ways. Herpes, AIDS, Gonorrhea; these are all STDs of the past. These days, sexually transmitted diseases are more extreme and bizarre. Not exactly diseases anymore, they are more like sexually transmitted body modifications. There's an STD that changes your hair color, an STD that causes your toes to grow larger, one causes you to grow extra breasts on your body, another causes your skin to grow long metal spikes, and there's an especially annoying STD that causes you to ejaculate miniature eyeballs. Tonight is Share Your STD Night at the Demon Seed Swingers Club. Although most members of society fear the idea of contracting these diseases, there are some underground deviants who embrace them. They believe the diseases make them strange, unique, and beautiful. So they come together once a month to trade their wonderful STDs with each other in a surreal, fantastical orgy. However, tonight will not be like other nights. There's a new disease spreading through the sex club, a disease that causes people to become rabid bloodthirsty killing machines. As the infected rampage through the Demon Seed, the survivors realize there's only one thing they can do to survive the night: turn their grotesque STDs into deadly super weapons. Also featuring the short stories: Candy-Coated - A buff dude with a lollipop for a head has a hard time picking up the laydaaays due to all of the bearded truckers who keep trying to lick his head. Ear Cat - A Kitty of the Month Club selection gone horribly wrong. City Hobgoblins - A member of a punk rock band falls in love with a shark-like creature. (a prequel to the cult novel Satan Burger) Porno in August - A group of porn actors find themselves floating in the middle of the ocean, unable to remember who they are or why they are there. (Chosen for The Year's Best Fantasy and Horror)

Skeleton Leaves: A Collection


Helen Marshall - 2011
    Gorgeous and heartbreaking.”—Sandra Kasturi, author of The Animal Bridegroom (Tightrope Books, 2007) and Come Late to the Love of Birds forthcoming from Tightrope Books.“With Ondaatje-like resonance and attention to detail, Marshall explores the fatal attraction between a boy who never grows up and a pirate in love with his own death, the deforming ideals of motherhood and the sad similarities between adulthood and Alzheimer’s.”—Gemma Files, author of The Hexslinger Series (ChiZine Publications, 2011) and The Worm in Every Heart (Prime Books, 2006)

Love Is Not Constantly Wondering If You Are Making the Biggest Mistake of Your Life


Anonymous - 2011
    Shot down over a mysterious planet, you have been taken captive by a race of giant, superintelligent ants. However, the story is actually about your relationship with a young woman named Anne, and your struggles to cope with her alcoholism. Only with the right choices will you be able to save your relationship and discover the secret of the Ant-Warriors!

The Final Dream


Daniel Pearlman - 2011
    Lansdale]To avoid nightmares, people plug in to dreams created by dreamspinners. But, suddenly, the dream maker wreaks havoc and torments the customers.A short-novel by Daniel Pearlman“Media coverage was as heavy as Brian had anticipated. National Funscope gave top billing today to its noontime “Dreambeam” feature. The set of dreams that Brian had experienced last night was in some ways the most remarkable performance ever beamed by the great Iones. Not for a moment did Brian doubt Iones’s stature as the world’s greatest dreamist. But the incomparable Iones, full of surprises as he was, had certainly pulled the rug out from under him last night! The great artist had spun a delightful web in his brain, a tale of mounting suspense that was just coming to some gratifying conclusion when it abruptly ended just before the moment of climax.”