Question: What would you do if you lost your best friend’s horse? Relax. This is purely hypothetical. But, seriously, what would you do? It’s an easy Sunday at home while your wife’s at work, and you look away for two minutes to make lunch for a couple of demanding toddlers. Somehow, by magical mist or advanced parkour, the monster is gone. Okay, fine. It’s not hypothetical. The guy off of work is me, Thatcher Kelly, and the horse I lost is actually Kline’s ginormous dog. But I still have his kids and demon cat, along with my own child and pig. I’m practically batting .667 at this point, and that’s a pretty good average. Right? Or one short jump from the devil’s number. Motherfluffer.

    Comic strip censors, apathetic baristas, and IRS employees are all strongly advised to laugh or get out of the way.Pearls Hogs the Road also features three comic strips illustrated by the legendary Bill Watterson of Calvin and Hobbes, who ended a 19-year hiatus from the comics page to collaborate with Pastis.

     Johnny Quick is your fantasy come true. Or is he your worst nightmare in the flesh? I'm an author. You know, the kind no one ever sees. I never leave my home in the woods. You'll never know who I really am. When a dickhead cover model steps over the line with my assistant, I have no choice. I always protect what's mine, no matter what lines it crosses. So, I cross the biggest line of them all. I bring Johnny Quick to life. He's the ultimate bad boy. He'll stick a knife in your ribs, fuck your wife, and blow your wad at the track, all in the same day. Every woman wants him. Nothing can touch him. Not even the law. He's unstoppable. And he's fiction. Johnny's the star of my bestselling Romance series. Now I need him to do a real job. That's where it all goes to hell. Fiction collides with reality… *Based on real experiences with the book world. **This is a stand alone story, built around depictions of true accounts of happenings within the Indie Author community. It contains violence, crude language, sexual situations, a few cliches, and some stereotypes thrown in for good measure.***

    Without losing their minds--or any other important body parts. And that gives this Christmas the potential to be their craziest one yet...

    Sometimes even the dog pays attention. But gradually, things get out of hand. A DAD'S PURPOSE, from W. Bruce Cameron, the #1 New York Times bestselling author of A Dog's Purpose and 8 Simple Rules for Dating My Teenage Daughter, is an instant classic. In this heartwarming book, Cameron comes to grips with how the chaos of children and parents and pets and homes conspire to turn a once perfectly normal life completely upside down. He quickly learns that the role of "Dad" must wear many hats -- from novice yogi to Montgomery Moose stand-in, to chili contest judge and free financial advisor. Cameron balances the hilarious moments of parenthood with the profound, poignant aspects of a dad’s life. Because although there may come a day when a father is relieved to hang up his moose costume, he will always treasure the times when his child wasn’t yet embarrassed to hold his hand. These moments are fleeting, but Cameron has captured them in A DAD’S PURPOSE. Whether you have a dad, are a dad, or might become a dad, please know that no one else is doing fatherhood perfectly either, and read this book of camaraderie and appreciation."Consistently funny...The book delivers a steady stream of quips and funny... readers of Dave Barry will be familiar with the exact register of Cameron's helpless self-depreciation and readers of David Sedaris will recognize that author's formula of ending each chapter with a funny paragraph, each paragraph with a funny sentence, and each sentence with a funny word. It's all enjoyable, lightweight riffing that may make new dads feel a little bit less alone." --Kirkus ReviewsPraise for W. Bruce Cameron:"W. Bruce Cameron has the knack, which he shares with Dave Barry and James Thurber, of playing the fool in a consistently hilarious way."--The New York Times"Makes the reader laugh out loud."--USA TODAY"This famous traitor to his sex reveals what men are really thinking."--O, The Oprah Magazine"The talk of parents nationwide."--People Magazine"Dead-serious humor reminiscent of Erma Bombeck."--The Chicago Tribune"W. Bruce Cameron is the Dave Barry of modern family life."--The Denver Post"Down to earth and funny, funny, funny."--The National Society of Newspaper Columnists"Hilarious!"--The Toronto Sun